Clarity
by Envy5
Summary: First a one shot, now extended. Clarity is the hottest night club in town. Owner/bartender Edward Cullen has all of the typical makings of a playboy, but will he give it all up to win the heart of Bella Swan? The name has changed, but the story will go on
1. Cupid's Got a Gun

_**A few things…**_

Song and lyrics belong to its writers and/or artists.

I don't own anything Twilight. No copyright infringement intended.

This is my first **real** story. I'm expanding on a one shot that I wrote a little while back called Midnight Blues for a contest that never happened. You should read that first.

I do not have a beta, so my apologies in advance.

Hate it or love it…let me know.

_Love is the ultimate paradox: it is death and decay; it is pain and suffering; is tears and heartaches - but in the end, it is eternal youth, energy, happiness, and joy. - Unknown_

**BPOV- In the Beginning (Cupid's Got a Gun)**

'_You watched me fall, stood over me as I hit the ground._

_Then he whispered his name in my ear, such a dark familiar sound...'_

Cupid's got a Gun is one of my favorite songs right now.

I step out of the shower and wipe my hand across the mirror, clearing it of the fog that had settled over the last half hour. A long, hot shower is exactly what I needed, so I took one. I smile at my reflection and grab a fresh towel while I hum along to the music. The heavy bass and lyrics from the song currently blaring through my Ihome are soothing to the myriad of thoughts running through my brain.

'_I should have known by the way he took my breath away._

_And the way he held me often hurt me, he told me love was pain…'_

I can't help but laugh because I am in a much better place than I would be had this been, say, a year and a half ago. I would have been as good as mush, crying and trying to figure out what was wrong with me. I would be somewhere curled up in a ball trying to make sense of all of my faults and everything that I could have done wrong while wasting my day away watching daytime television and eating cereal that would rot my teeth.

'_Man, I should've known he would do me dirt,_

_So miserable, I'm'll stomp through a puddle._

_Cupid's got a weapon, gotta part with the devil._

_Tell him that I'm done._

_Tell him that I'm not here._

_Hit him with the lamp. I'm'll hit him with a chair…'_

I can't help my laugh because I'm not that girl and I haven't been for a while now.

I'm sure some would consider me to be an emo bitch for listening to music like this first thing in the morning, but after the shit Emery pulled on me, it just can't be helped. I'm not emo – far from it actually – and that alone will strike people as odd.

I laugh again and continue the task of drying myself off.

"Bella, will you turn that shit down? You've been playing that same song non-stop all morning!" Rosalie yelled from her room down the hall.

I just chuckle and go back to towel drying my hair.

I have to leave for class in a few minutes and then I have to come back, change and hall ass downtown to a job interview that Alice and Rose are both making me go on. I had never seen myself working in a bar, but I need a job if these bills are going to stay paid.

I click the off button on my Ihome and stuff my Ipod and headphones into my purse. I'd be lost if I ever left the house without my music. A world without tunes just isn't worth living in. Period.

I double back and grab my journal on the remote chance that I'll have some down time in between classes.

I make my way down the hall to the kitchen where I find Rosalie sitting at the breakfast bar, reading the paper and eating a bagel. I reach in the fridge to find the orange juice, trying my best to avoid her glare that I'm sure to capture once she realizes that I'm making my way out to campus for the day.

The fact that we hadn't had our usual heart to heart about my break up with Embry hasn't escaped me, but it isn't something that I want to make a big deal over. She's been chomping at the bit ever since I came home Saturday night and I've made it the rest of the weekend without going into detail with her or anyone else about it. Even Alice and her all knowing texts haven't broken me down. There is no need to linger there now; I just hope Rose feels the same way.

She hasn't looked up from the Style section yet, so I may just be home free.

"So, I see you're still pissed at Embry." It was more of a statement than a question.

_Dammit._

I take a deep breath before I speak, but then decide to just go with my gut. Fuck it.

"No, Rose, I'm not still pissed at Embry. He's an asshole, so I can't really be mad at him for doing what an asshole is supposed to do, now can I?" I lean against the counter with a huff. If she's going to start the morning out in bitch mode, then I am going to meet her there step for fucking step.

No, she hasn't said too much in the form of words, but I know her and her mannerisms well enough to know exactly where she's headed.

She takes a moment to observe my defensive stance and you could see her decision to back off flash quickly behind her eyes. I met her stare for another moment or two before I would allow myself to believe she was actually going to drop this subject. I return the bottle of orange juice to its rightful place in the refrigerator. There was no need for us to fight, especially not over this.

"I'm not trying to give you a hard time, Bells, I hope you know that. I just don't want you wasting time on a slime ball like him. Think about it. He did you a favor," she said as she finished her bagel and came to lean next to me against the counter. "Trust me."

I know Rosalie is just looking out for my best interests, she'd said as much the minute I'd introduced her to Embry Call. I liked him well enough, sure, but it wasn't like we were engaged or anything. I wasn't invested enough to be truly hurt by his actions and that was by design. I made it that way. I had sworn off of attaching myself to guys romantically ever since the Riley debacle, so I had no doubt that I would survive _this_. _This_ is actually nothing.

My friends had dubbed that period during our freshman year as "Rileygate" and I still cringe each and every time I have to hear about it. That seems to be just about every time I show the slightest interest in a man. I suppose I should be grateful; I should be happy that I have people in my life that care and look out for me.

I love my friends, but I am a big girl with big girl panties on and I don't have a heart of glass. At least not anymore I don't. The _last_ thing that they will ever have to lose sleep over is Bella Swan falling in love. It won't happen. Embry was simply a handsome distraction. Hell, my pride is probably more damaged than anything else and the fact that I was the one to end it satisfies my practical need for revenge. I _will_ bounce back from the few short months that I spent with him.

Ever since I fell into that age old trap with Riley, I rarely have to worry about jerks playing Russian roulette with my heart. I took a chance on Embry, I am woman enough to admit that, and I got burned. _Shit happens_. Nowadays, I try to look at relationships as learning experiences and nothing more. You win some, you lose some. _Whatever_.

"I'm good, Rose, trust _me_. I just get inspiration from my choices in music."

My attempt at lightening the mood bombed. She really and truly looked concerned for me and there was just no need for it. Rose needed to know that I wasn't upset_, but nobody said I couldn't be a bitter bitch._

"Besides, it's not like I'm going to start stalking the poor bastard. I can't say that I wouldn't like to give him a hard knee to the junk, but I'm not stressing. I didn't like him enough for all of that." I give Rose a cheeky grin, knowing how much she would love my next point.

"He just may have to see me out and about this weekend, looking fantastic I might add, to know exactly what he's missing out on. No harm no foul." I shrug my shoulders to emphasize just how much I don't care.

"There's my girl!" Rose glances at the clock as she gives me a quick hug. "Shit, look at the time. I've got to run, but we'll talk later."

She shoots me a wink and heads out the door.

I shake my head, laughing at the protective mama bear that is my best friend.

I am not far behind her, grabbing my laptop bag and slinging it over my shoulder as I lock the door. I put my ear buds in as I take the stairs down to the lobby of our building and hit play on my IPod. I wave at the doorman and begin my walk towards the train station.

'_Cupid's got a gun and he shot me with it. Cupid's got a gu – un. But who said he's a lover? Really he's murderer…'_

I smile to myself. _Let's get the day started._

**xxMBxx**

Campus is its usual flurry of activity and excitement on the first day of fall quarter.

Students are crossing the quad trying to get to class on time while professors and various members of the faculty are rubbing elbows amidst the hallowed halls of education. I think it's safe to say that I have found my place here at Northwestern. I have enjoyed my time here so far, but I look forward to the day that I am considered a part of its alumni.

My first class of the day starts soon and I'm cutting it a little close in regards to time, but that's alright. Very few things could change my mood or disrupt my stride right now. I'd already been by the book store to get my textbooks and I picked up the booklet that the professor recommended we purchase to accompany the regular seminar in my first course. I am off to an excellent start!

Being in my junior year puts me in a strange position, but I really don't have anybody to blame for that but myself. Sort of like my need to work in a bar to make ends meet, I find myself balancing the classes that I need to complete my major with the classes that are of genuine interest to me.

I've worked closely with my counselor in the College of Business and I believe we've struck a good balance. My decision to major in Business and Public Relations was a sound one; it is a field in which I can excel and make a comfortable living. That idea is a foreign one to me having grown up in the tiny town of Forks and having a small town police chief for a father. Majoring in business means that I can get an internship before I finish school and get a job at a reputable firm. I may even be able to move quickly up the corporate ladder.

But, if I were being completely true to my hearts' desire, speaking candidly during a moment of sheer weakness, literature would have been my one and only choice. Perhaps, during another lifetime where the amount of money I make isn't important, I could explore a dream like that.

"Bella!" I hear someone yell from across the quad.

I turn around and see Alice waving at me like a perky little maniac.

I slow my steps as she leans into a shiny, black Mustang convertible with the top down being driven by...a male model? The weather isn't that bad yet, so I guess it's not _too_ strange of a sight.

I'm not sure who she's talking to, but whoever it is, he is a mighty fine specimen. He's wearing a dark pair of sunglasses and has a crazy head of auburn hair that has definitely seen its fair share of wind this morning. It looks just like I would imagine it would have had I run my hands through it from root to tip. I grab a hold of the strap of my laptop bag to keep myself from running over and embarrassing myself. I wait for her to finish instead.

After a few seconds of running the tip of my shoe through a patch of dandelions, she's rushing towards me. Alice moves just as quickly in stilettos as Rose does. The convertible passes me as she approaches.

_If a blur can be attractive, that was a damn good example of one. _

"Hey Ali, are you ready to start this madness all over again?" I ask as she catches up to me. We start making our way toward the student center together.

"Please. You know I'm always ready, how about you? "

"I'm good. I'll be even better once I get some coffee into me. Who was that in the hot car?"

"Oh, that was just my brother. He dropped me off since I left my car at Angela's after the party on Saturday night."

Oh yeah…_that_ party. I should have known that Alice was too messed up to drive home, but I hauled ass off campus as soon as I had my altercation with Embry. I feel horrible for that.

"Are you serious? Alice, I am so sorry. You should've just come home with Rose and crashed with us." I pulled her into my side and hugged her, hoping she would accept my apology for sucking so badly at being her friend.

"Don't even worry about it. Edward was good to come and get me. He was at a friend's house not too far away. Besides, I could've just crashed at Angela's if I was that desperate."

"Still," I said, not wanting her to let me off the hook so easily.

"Whatever, you had your hands full," she said as she waved me off.

We walked in an awkward silence, her waiting for me to elaborate on what had me occupied on Saturday and I was waiting on her to change the subject. She knows all about Saturday already from Rose and I'm not talking about that today.

"So, how is your course load this quarter?" I decided to take the initiative.

"I've actually got 17 credit hours. It's going to be brutal."

Damn, I hadn't taken that many hours in one quarter since freshman year. That was Alice though. She never did anything half assed.

"Really? How are you going to swing that?" I asked, concerned that she was taking on too much.

"It really won't be that bad if you think about it. Instead of taking on a minor, I'm starting on my Business Enterprises certificate. That will make my time in New York even more worthwhile after we graduate."

Alice had her eyes set on attending the Masen Design School in New York right out of undergrad. Interior design and anything related to fashion was where Alice wanted to be, but Northwestern is one of the best names you can have on your resume when it comes to business. Getting that certificate would put her near the top of her incoming class when it came to snagging the better and more prestigious internships. I'm not sure why this surprises me, though. She is always a step ahead of everybody else. That freaky brain of hers could come in handy sometimes.

"So, are you still feeling ok about your interview?" she asked.

"Yes, I'm good to go. Even if they don't hire me, it'll be good practice."

Like most people, I tend to get stage fright when it comes to interviews or being analyzed. When I interviewed at Newton's Outfitters back home, Charlie had to drag me down the stairs. Regardless of whether I was ready or not, someone was going to have to hire me to do something.

"Have faith, girl. Don't forget, I know about these things." She tapped her forehead to emphasize her point.

"I know, I know," I laughed at my omniscient little friend.

"Listen, I'm not working tonight, but be ready by a quarter 'til."

**xxMBxx**

I stop in the student center to grab a coffee since the next hour and a half of my life will be spent in a seminar on Comparative Literary Studies and its relationship to other forms of creative production such as fine art, new media and music. _This_ is one of the few classes that I can count on to marry what I _will_ be doing with what I _wish_ I could do, so I want to make sure I'm fully aware and functional.

"Isabella Swan. To what do I owe the pleasure?"

I shiver a little as I recognize the condescending tenor of the voice. It was both uncomfortably close and unnecessarily loud to my eardrum. There is only one person that would take my attempts at ignoring him to mean that I'm having trouble hearing.

I lean back a little and turn to see Tyler Crowley, staring open mouthed as usual, standing way too close for comfort. Like most students on their first day of school, he's dressed to impress in his preppy khaki pants and argyle sweater.

I should probably mention that most of those students running out to buy new clothes for the first day of school are normally in middle or high school.

I notice a slight hint of smugness about him today, which speaks volumes about his arrogant ass. We're both third year students, so we're bound to run into each other, no matter how hard I try to avoid him. The pleasure is absolutely all his.

"Tyler, how are you? Beautiful day, don't you think?" I figure plastering my fake smile and feigning pleasantries will make my escape that much easier because I really don't have the time for this shit today.

"It's definitely a beautiful day out, Little Swan, but imagine how much more lovely my morning became when I heard that you and Embry Call were no longer an item?"

_Shit. Shit. Fucking shit._

I have been ducking and dodging Tyler since I met him during our freshman orientation. He was one of those guys that must've been considered 'big time' in high school and thought that that popularity would automatically transfer over for him in college. I mean really, who wears their letterman jacket from high school to campus? I'm sure he was a nice enough guy, but his cockiness was like bug spray to a family of mosquitoes on a camping trip to me. I simply wasn't interested in getting to know him any better, especially after I spent a few precious moments that I would never get back talking to him.

Of course, in my world, that meant that he would take an unhealthy interest in me and would act as my shadow from that day forward.

_Shit._

"Hmm. That's interesting, Tyler. I see the gossip mill is up and running this quarter."

He laughs and takes a step closer like I had given him a compliment or something. _What the hell?_

"Yes, it would seem so. You know how I like to keep my ears open in case there is news that is of interest to me." He takes another step closer and puts his arm against the wall that I'm standing next to, bringing him even further into the boundaries of my personal space.

_Dear God,_

_it's me._

_Please don't make me have to junk punch this imbecile on my first day of class._

_Seriously._

_Love, Bella_

"So, Bella, what do you say we discuss my lovely morning and the newest product of the gossip mill over dinner this evening?"

I cock my head to the side, trying to gauge if he is really serious or not. If I didn't know any better, I would think that he believed he had a shot with me, even after all this time of me target practicing his ego.

But hell, he couldn't be that damn stupid. We _both_ knew better than that.

At that very moment, the barista called my name, signaling that my coffee was as ready to go as I was. I rushed over to the condiment area, grabbed a handful of sweetener, and backed out of the nearest doorway as quickly as I could.

_Thank you, God._

"Tyler, you know, as great as that sounds, I'm going to have to take a pass on that. See ya!"

I don't remember sprinting that fast across the quad in my life.

**xxMBxx**

Several hours and three classes later, I was back at the apartment getting ready for my interview. Monday was the only day of the week that I had to go to all three of my courses this quarter. I was drained, but it would be worth it to have a more relaxed schedule for the remainder of the week. Alice is coming by to pick me up for my job interview, so I have plenty of time to get ready without having to worry about getting to the train station on time.

I jump in the shower and pin my hair up into a tight bun, letting a few loose strands hang freely. I wasn't sure just how professionally I would need to be dressed since I had never interviewed at a bar before. Alice wasn't much help, at least not the way she normally is when I come to her for fashion advice. She gave me some lame excuse about not wanting to jinx it by adding her two cents and changing the outcome of the interview.

I love her, but she can be a space cadet at times.

Rose stepped in and helped me. We played it safe by selecting a charcoal gray pinstripe skirt and a light gray silk blouse. Confident and sexy – exactly what I want them to think. Rose gave the outfit her stamp of approval while she told me a little bit about this place - Midnight Blues. She has only been working there for about three months, but I had never been there. Not that I don't enjoy a nice night out with my friends, but since both Rose and Alice worked there, I sort of avoided it. I haven't had many real jobs, but work always seems like the place you avoid when you have free time, so I would usually suggest other places for us to go out and do damage.

Surprisingly, she only had positive things to say. Rose could be a hard ass and I trusted her to give it to me straight, the good and the bad. She told me that the tips were fabulous because the variety of clientele ranged from college students to the well-to-do upper crust of Chicago. There was a restaurant along with a full service bar, with the bar doing the majority of their business. The restaurant was so good, though, private parties were almost always being held there. The owners were friendly and fair and the atmosphere was busy, but somehow, relaxed at the same time. I knew from talking to Alice that her brother was a co-owner, but I had never had the chance to meet him. Rose said he was cool, but I figured he had to be a jerk if he made his sisters' friend's interview like everybody else. Alice just laughed at me and told me he and his partner were a pair of young, inexperienced businessmen that wanted to do everything by the book since this was their first true business venture. I really don't care, just as long as they like me and they're paying.

I put on the lightest touch of makeup, step into my sensible black pumps and give myself a once over in the mirror. I also say a silent prayer that I don't slip or something equally embarrassing before I have a chance to get this job. My phone vibrates on the dresser just as I look at the clock to check the time. It's a text from Alice:

_I'm outside waiting on your fine ass. Come on!_

I giggle and grab my purse and light leather jacket. The season is just turning to fall, so the days are nice, but the Chicago evenings are starting to get chilly. I'd rather be safe than sorry in case Alice and I decide to do something afterwards.

After a few minutes in Alice's bright yellow Beetle, my nerves are starting to set in. "Are you sure I look okay for this, Alice?" I'm not sure why, but suddenly, I'm very squeamish about going on this interview.

"What are you talking about? You look great! I couldn't have done a better job of dressing you myself. Don't let Rose know that." I giggle because she's right; it would go straight to her head if she knew that. "Besides, this is really just a formality. My word alone tells Edward and Jasper that you're the one for the job. Relax."

I tell myself to relax, but my mind is going into hyper drive.

"I didn't even bring copies of my resume. Alice, we have to go back."

"Bella, chill. This is a real interview, but they have already seen your resume. If you're that nervous, consider this more of a meet and greet. You have absolutely nothing to worry about."

"Alice?" I can't think of anything else to say.

"Bella, really. Have I steered you wrong yet?"

No, she hadn't. She was as good of a friend to me as Rosalie and I had only met her when I started at Northwestern. Rosalie and I have been friends since we were little, so that says a lot about Alice and how awesome of a person she is. She'd give the shirt off of her back to a stranger if they needed it.

I blow out a breath and lean my head against the window as the busy streets of Chicago pass us by.

I may as well enjoy the ride.


	2. Something

**Housekeeping Items…**

Quotes, songs and lyrics belong to their writers and/or artists. Get used to it. They'll be used in pretty much all of my stuff because music is a major inspiration for me.

I don't own anything related to Twilight. No copyright infringement intended.

I do not have a beta, so my apologies in advance.

Hate it or love it…let me know.

**Chapter 2**

**EPOV – Something…**

The grand essentials of happiness are: something to do, something to love, and something to hope for.

– Alan K. Chalmers

'_Shoulda known better than to think this was real, _

_And you could be mine…_

_Shoulda known better. Slowed it down; Cause I feel you needed time…_

_But I kept thinking…_

_This could be something. This could be something. This could be something._

_Or maybe it's just nothing at all…'_

"Dude, what the fuck do you have us listening to?" Emmett bellowed.

I sighed before I laughed, hoping he didn't see my shoulders shaking.

Emmett always walked around here like a baby during our weekly clean up and he never did truly appreciate my eclectic taste in music. I had just put a new CD into the small stereo system behind the bar. There was no need to fiddle around with the much larger system behind the DJ booth, especially when Mike wasn't here to work it.

Once a week, I had the entire staff come in to clean everything. This was in addition to cleaning as they went during their shifts and the overall wash down we did at the end of each night.

_What can I say? My OCD wouldn't allow for anything less. _

We followed both a weekly and monthly checklist of what needed to be addressed, each person taking care of their own respective areas when the schedule was set properly. Emmett tried to convince me to hire a separate crew to come in and do it, but I felt like we would get better results if it was done by people that actually gave a damn.

The pay differential was enough to shut him up after awhile.

Still, he complained about any and every thing that he could wrap his mind around while he carried boxes of liquor or baskets of fresh linen to the places they were supposed to go. Right now, he was ragging on my music and it was getting on my nerves.

"Emmett, this is a nice song. Actually, the whole album is really good. You should check him out," I said, trying to convince him to give this up and coming artist that I'd stumbled upon a try.

Jasper picked that moment to walk through the room on his way back outside to finish the windows. He wore a pair of jean overalls and a wife beater, extra long squeegee and fresh bucket of water in hand.

"He's right, Em, you should check it out. Although, I do have to say that I concur with your observation that our boy Edward here is setting quite the depressing tone."

"Don't you have more manual labor to tend to?"I asked. I didn't need any help from the peanut gallery.

He bowed and flipped me the bird as he made his way out, whistling a tune.

"Whatever, man," Emmett said. "You always seem to find something _new _and _upcoming_ to bore the shit out of us on clean up day." He put the boxes down on the bar with a huff.

That last part may have been a little bit true. I knew I had been different lately. I wouldn't necessarily say I was boring; I would maybe say I was melancholy or contemplative. Either is better than boring. I knew that something had shifted in my attitude about a lot of things, but I couldn't put my finger on exactly what it was.

At first, I thought it was my recent separation from Tanya. She and I had tried our best to make it work, but I really wasn't cut out for the relationship thing. At least I hadn't been in the past. Even outside of that, it wasn't the relationship thing that wore on me. I was actually _ready_ to try something different, something more settled. When Tanya and I struck up our relationship, I thought I was ready, but the problem wasn't about being ready. The problem was her.

That was weeks ago and I was long over the loss of having her in my life. We had only tried for a solid two months, anyway. I was more affected by the failure of the entire thing. Once my mindset shifted, I knew with full clarity that we were wasting each others' time.

Her leaving was for the best; even Jasper could back me up on that. But since then, I found that I wasn't in the mood for the usual hook up on Friday and break up on Monday that I typically went for. It was fun and I had done a lot more of it than I should have in my day. Hell, I could probably continue doing that for as long as I wanted, but I found that I wanted something more, something deeper. I wanted to be _fulfilled_.

Once that realization had occurred to me, I knew then that a change was brewing and bubbling up within me. I didn't just want it. I needed it. It was a feeling that I had never felt. It was maturity. It was certainty. It was all encompassing. It had me scared shitless.

I had retreated inside of myself, you could say.

I didn't want to burden anybody with my troubles and I wanted to sort it all out for myself. I took an inventory of my life. I had an education. I had a great family. I had wonderful friends. I had a flourishing business, not too many worries about money. That left one major, gaping hole within an otherwise flawless picture…some one that I actually _wanted_ to share it with.

Tanya had tried. I had tried. But you can't put a round peg into a square hole it would seem.

"Calm down. I'll put you out of your misery soon enough," I said as I went behind the counter to shut off the stereo.

I shot him a glare that he returned in kind as I turned to address my staff.

"Ok, everybody; you all did a great job today. I'll meet you guys back here for the dinner shift."

Everyone scattered to finish up any last minute things before we separated for the next few hours. I was going to go up to my office and do some paper work before guests started to arrive. As I gathered my things, Emmett met me at the pass.

"What's up, man?" I asked, trying to remain casual. He had a serious look on his face that made me kind of uncomfortable. Emmett was always the happy go lucky one out of our group.

"You, man. What's been up with you lately?" I took a step back, slightly offended at being called out by my friend.

_Have I been that obvious? I thought I was doing a pretty good job at acting normal._

Before I could ask out loud, he continued.

"You haven't come out with us in fucking forever. You work while we chill after close each night. You're torturing everybody within earshot of your maudlin ass music. Something has seriously crawled up your ass and died."

I was surprised, that much was for sure, but not at what he was saying. His words were right on the money. I was surprised that I had been found out so quickly. I was doing my best at maintaining the status quo, but I guess I had been way more transparent than I had planned.

_Didn't mean I had to admit that shit._

"I'm not sure what you mean, Emmett. I don't have a problem."

"Bull. Shit." He said, crossing his arms over his chest. I was going to have to give him some kind of answer if he was ever going to let me past him.

"Look. I appreciate the concern, but nothing is wrong. I've just had a lot on my mind is all." I clapped him on the back appreciating that he was concerned for me. "Truly, there's nothing for you to worry about."

He looked at me, long and hard, and I knew then that he wasn't convinced. Not by a long shot.

"I don't buy it. There's something going on and its either going to be me or its going to be Jasper, but one of us is going to figure you the fuck out."

"Em, you are stressing yourself over nothing." When he shook his head in response, I tried for a more roundabout way to put him at ease. "Don't you ever find that you just need some time alone in your own head?"

Confusion colored his face.

"I don't know what the fuck you're talking about, but we're going to get to the bottom of this shit tonight. You're coming out with us. There's a party tonight at Carmen and Tia's near campus and you're going."

"I don't want to go to a party tonight. Near campus? Why the hell would we go to campus?"

He walked closer to me and poked me in the chest to highlight each of his words.

"You. Will. Be. There."

I rubbed my chest and watched him as he grabbed his keys and walked out the front door.

I guess I was going to be there.

**xxMBxx**

Dinner service went off without a hitch.

It was a Saturday night, so the restaurant was filled with satisfied diners, but the bar was usually where the action was. I wasn't bar tending tonight, so I had changed into a suit; my usual routine on nights that I took on a more managerial role. By the looks of things, we'd be full right up until close. I stood at the cash register and just stared at it. I'd have to wait to go through all of the receipts to see what we took in. Apparently, I was going out tonight.

"Monday." Jasper said, sneaking up behind me.

"Monday?"

"Yes, Monday." was all he followed with. I was officially lost.

"Is there something that I'm supposed to know about Monday? I feel like I'm missing something."

"No, I don't suppose you would know anything about Monday, but that's why I'm telling you now; this coming Monday in particular."

Jasper was one of my dearest, oldest and most smart assed friends. I really didn't want to get pissed off at him, but he was pushing my buttons and he knew it.

"Ok, so I'll bite. Monday?"

_This would be the only time I asked him before I told him to kiss my ass on whatever day of the week he chose._

"First, I need you to chill. Emmett and I are going to get you good and loosened up tonight so you can finally tell us what your deal is."

I rolled my eyes, but he had my attention, so he kept on talking.

"Second, Monday is the day that Alice has all of our interviews coming in for hostess and waitress positions. We are only down a couple in the restaurant, but I'd like to add a few more bar maids."

Jasper had been hounding me about increasing the staff to handle our recent boost in patrons. He had been trying to link up a time where we could both sit down and do all of the interviews in one fell swoop; I just hadn't been in the mindset to follow through lately. I admit that I was being difficult with my schedule on purpose. Even though I was fine with burying myself in work, I wasn't overly anxious to be around a group of new women, even if they were potential employees. Plus, I didn't have the patience that Jasper and I always seemed to need when weeding through any 'undesirables.'

Luckily, we now had Alice.

She took care of going through all of the applications and the phone screenings that we insisted upon. This happened before any of the applicants stepped foot in here with the idea of spending any substantial amount of time and being paid for it. She made sure we only saw the cream of the crop and I knew she would deliver this time as well. I just didn't want to be bothered.

"Monday, then?"

"Monday," he said, not even trying to hide his slick little grin.

_Ass._

"Fine. I'll be there with bells on," I said, sarcasm heavy in my voice.

"Good. First one is set to arrive at noon." Alice said.

We both turned at the sound of her musical voice. With a full house, Alice had been attached to the hostess station for the better part of the evening. She stood tall in her designer heels, but she was still a munchkin as far as I could see.

She approached and rose up to her tippy toes to plant a kiss on my cheek.

"Hey, Ali," I said, still eyeing Jasper.

"So does that work for you? I hadn't really had a chance to check, but we received a good deal of qualified applicants this go around and I didn't want to miss out on adding some dependable members to the staff." She asked. My sister knew that I didn't like surprises.

"No, that's cool. My issue is with how it was presented. You know how you can look at your favorite meal with extreme distaste if it's served to you on a garbage can lid? It's all in the presentation."

Jasper laughed, but he still hadn't torn his eyes away from my little sister.

"Great. I think you'll both be very pleased," she said, looking up at me and then slowly turning her attention towards Jasper.

"Alice, let me just say that I was pleased the moment you walked through the door this evening in that stunning dress and those fabulous shoes." He took her hand in his and brought it to his lips. "You, my dear, are a sight for sore eyes," he crooned.

_Jesus._

I'd known Jasper long enough to know when he was putting in work towards getting the attention of a female, but this was laying it on a little thick, even for him. This had actually started a while back. I still wasn't sure how I felt about him flirting, much less hooking up, with Alice, but I also wasn't going to stand in his way outright until I had the chance to question him fully on his intentions. I would like to think that he knew better than to pull a one hitter quitter on _my_ sister of all people.

"I'll take that as my queue. If you'll both excuse me."

_We all have problems and I'll worry about theirs on another day._

I took my leave of them and went looking for Emmett. He managed security for us, but he wasn't at the front of the house or at the bar. Those were his usual hangouts during the course of the night. He always said he wanted a front row seat for any trouble that might get started, but that wasn't the type of crowd we had in tonight.

I found him once I decided I would check on things in the kitchen.

"Do you have any plans for tonight? You should come and hang out with us," he said, his voice low and deep. He was obviously talking to somebody, but I couldn't see around him to know who it was.

"That doesn't sound half bad, but I _do_ have plans. I'm going to a party with my roommate," I heard a feminine voice responding. It sounded like Rosalie, but I wasn't used to her sounding so sugary sweet.

I didn't want to be rude and interrupt, so I leaned a little to my right to get a better view.

_Yep, it's Rosalie._

"Hmm, maybe we'll run into each other, then," he said.

"Yeah, we just might. I'll be sure to keep an eye out," she responded, running a finger along his lapel.

The order for her table was called, cutting off their discussion. She sauntered past him, carrying a tray of appetizers and looked over her shoulder at him.

"Hey, Edward," she said as she passed me by, like it was the most natural thing in the world.

"Hey Rose," I said in return, mirroring her air of calm.

Once she was out of the door and out of ear shot, I leaned on the wall to my left and crossed my arms over my chest, making myself comfortable. I felt the sweet surge of satisfaction running through my veins at the fact that I'd caught Emmett red handed. Let him tell it, he was the Leon Phelps of Chicago and didn't have to try at attracting females.

This would be sweet.

I stood and waited for him to make eye contact with me. Once he raised his head and removed the fingers that were rubbing relentlessly at his temple, I let my ear to ear grin overtake my face.

"Well, well, well. What do we have here?" I said, joy gleaming through my words.

"Shit," he said as he rubbed the back of his head. He was clearly trying to run through his big book of excuses. I could see it as he turned from one page to the next; still not finding what he was looking for.

"Look. I was going to tell you guys tonight that I was, am interested…in Rose. I swear."

_Well, I'll be damned. Looks like he decided on going with the truth._

I parted my lips to speak, but he held his hand up to stop me.

"Before you say anything, I really like her and I would appreciate some space on this."

I raised an eyebrow at him, waiting to see why he thought I would object.

"At least until I know where this is going to go," he amended. "I know we both work here and I've never asked or thought to ask about workplace relations and all that other professional bullshit, but Rose is different. I mean, Rose makes this different. I mean, she's a good girl and we haven't done anything. Damn, I don't know what I'm trying to say."

He went back to rubbing his temple. He was clearly frustrated, maybe even a tad nervous, but that only made this moment that much more interesting.

"Fuck it. Rose is hot. And not just hot like her ass or her tits are hot, I mean she's hot like her brain is hot, too. She's the total package, I wrote a fucking letter to Maxim about my dreams about her kind of hot. She's smart as hell and she's great at her job and she's in school and she's going to be great at whatever the fuck she's studying since I haven't gotten far enough to ask her yet and she doesn't take any shit, especially not any of my shit, and I think I want her to be the mother of my children…"

I was at a loss for words and Emmett was out of breath.

"Listen, I was just going to tease you a little bit, but you're serious about all of this, aren't you?"

"As a heart attack, bro," he finally managed while taking a huge sigh of relief.

We had never put out any written stipulations on 'office' romances. I didn't feel it was appropriate to get involved in them myself, but I had faith and trust in the people we hired. I would let them make their own choices as far as that topic went.

"Then I'm happy for you. You know better than that. I would never begrudge you the chance to go after something you want. Jasper wouldn't either. I only ask that you keep it professional in front of customers, but have at it. By all means, have at it," I laughed.

I turned and walked out of the kitchen, not having checked up on anything. I couldn't wait to tell Jasper.

**xxMBxx**

A few hours later, we were at a little spot that we used to frequent on East Grand Avenue called Tequila's.

It wasn't much, just a little dive bar on the outskirts of campus. The party over at Carmen and Tia's was in full swing, but that wasn't exactly the atmosphere that would allow us to talk the way the three of us needed to. I tried to convince them to stay at the bar until the last of our customers cleared out, but they wouldn't hear of it, saying I needed some fresh air. Jessica and Lauren would handle close.

We stopped by Carmen's, still in our suits from work, and stood out like sore thumbs. After getting a few starter drinks in me and a few 'private' after party invitations from the ladies, I was where Jasper felt I was sufficiently loosened up. We made our way out and stumbled into Tequila's.

"Shit, I haven't been in here in years," the feelings of déjà vu hitting me as soon as we sat down.

"I know, right? The place hasn't changed a bit." Jasper said.

He put three fingers in the air, signaling the waitress.

"I'm just going to come out and say this now because I feel like a complete douche bag having to come to you shitheads at all."

We both looked up at Emmett, surprise on my face and confusion on Jaspers'.

"What's up man, you look intense," Jasper said. I hadn't had a chance to update him with my discovery from earlier tonight.

Emmett sat with his elbows on the table, slowly banging his forehead. He mumbled, just low enough for us to still be able to hear him.

"I need help."

Emmett finally looked up when our drinks arrived. He filled Jasper in on what I saw and then filled us in on the rest of the blanks.

Their story was fairly simple. He hadn't really gotten far or made any head way in regards to pursuing Rosalie; just some idle chit chat here and some flirting there. He knew just enough to know that he really liked her and that she was somewhat interested, but he was stuck. The usual flexing of his biceps and making his pecs dance wasn't going to work on this one.

As he told us more about his interactions with Rose, his eyes sparkled as he recounted each of their exchanges and innocent touches. It was like he had committed them all to memory. It was obvious that our boy was in love. I don't think he would have been able to hide it from us much longer if he wanted to. I was happy for him, definitely.

He was a close friend and you want all of your people to be happy, but there was a low ache deep in my belly that silently told me I was just the tiniest bit jealous. He had clearly found that _something_. But, by the time he finished talking, he just looked…depressed.

"I don't know what the hell I'm doing. And when I say I don't know what I'm doing, I mean _at all_. I need help."

"Geez," was all I could contribute. "We all need some damn help. I know I do." I took a long pull from my beer, crossing my arms.

_How the hell was I supposed to help him when I was doing such a shitty job at helping myself?_

Jaspers' chuckle broke me from my selfish brooding.

"Dude, you've come to the wrong fucking place for help with that," He laughed around the neck of his bottle.

"Ok, so I'm really not trying to be a wise ass or anything, but didn't you have a shit ton of girlfriends in high school?" He asked

I knew where he was going, so I just shook my head and listened.

"Hell yeah, I did," Emmett scoffed. "I was captain of the football team."

Jasper leaned over and patted him on the shoulder by way of an apology.

"Of course you were. Anyway, why don't you just do _that_? It sounds a lot like that high-school-puppy-love-do-you-like-me-circle-yes-or-no shit."

Now, _that_ surprised me. I had always pictured Jasper to be more of a romantic, or at the least, more sensitive to the needs of others. After all, he was the one with all the southern hospitality and charm. Still, I chose not to interrupt his rant.

"Write her a damn note and slip it on her tray or something."

"Fuck you, Jazz."

"What? I'm just saying. It can't be as complicated as you're making it sound."

"Jazz, it's the most complex fucking algebra problem that I have ever seen in my life. I think she's the one, man."

"How could you possibly even know that?"

"I don't know! That's what I've been trying to tell you losers all night. All I know is that I've never felt like this about a chick. _Never_. I don't just want to bang her. I mean, I do, but there's something else…"

"Ok, ok. Don't have an aneurysm. I move we table this new development for the solutions segment of the evening. Edward, I believe you have a few things that you need to get off your chest, too. Out with it, man."

And so I did.

I spilled every thought that had been running through my jumbled and confused mind during the last month or so. My two best friends sat and listened, not interrupting me once. That was weird. _They always interrupted me._

When I finished, they both just sat there for a while, so I waited.

Then they sat some more, still not saying a word.

"Whoa."

Emmett was the first to break the uncomfortable silence. "I thought I had problems. That's heavy, man."

Jasper smirked between the two of us. "Reform…I like it."

"You make it sound like I'm a fucking recovering psycho sex addict or something." I said.

"No, not at all. I didn't mean it like that. I guess I'm saying I'm sort of… proud of you."

I looked over at my friend, only seeing sincerity.

"Actually, it's really funny that you and Emmett have both been thinking along those lines. There's something that I've wanted to talk to you about. It's been on my mind for awhile, actually. I…"

Just then, my phone buzzed in my pocket. I pulled it out and sat it on the table. Alice was calling me.

"Hey Alice," I said.

There was no answer, just muffled noise.

"Alice? Alice, are you there?" The loud music and people milling around in the background made it hard for me to tell if she had answered me or not this time.

"Ed – waaaaard!" She yelled.

"Alice, are you ok?" I asked. Emmett looked up at me while Jasper's entire body immediately tensed up.

"I'm fine, Ed –waaa- aard! How did you get on my phone? A- and why did -didn't you tell me Snake Bites are SOOOO much better than Lemon Drops?"

_Shit. She was fucking drunk out of her mind._

"Alice? Fuck, tell me where you are."

I could feel myself starting to panic. She was already small as hell. Her little frame couldn't handle tequila and vodka mixed together like that. I know we taught her better when it came to managing her liquor intake. _Dark liquor, never sicker and all that._

"I'm at An – A –Angel's, oops, I mean Angela's and I'm having the BEST time, Ed – waa – ard! She throws the BEST parties…"

I grabbed my keys off of the table and quickly made my way out to the truck. Jasper and Emmett were right behind me. I was going to try to keep Alice on the line, at least until I could figure out where the hell she was.

"Alice, sweetheart, can you put one of your friends on the phone for me?"

**xxMBxx**

"The room! Edward, make the room stop spinning!"

Alice was curled up in my guest room, dealing with the worst hangover of her life. I stood in the doorway, sipping my coffee. I watched as she rolled around on the bed trying to find a comfortable spot.

_Poor thing._

"So, I take it you don't want to go to brunch this morning? That's a shame. A three cheese omelette from Martha's sounded great today."

"Eww, Edward!" She yelled as she ran into the bathroom to hurl whatever ungodly mess was left in her stomach.

I laughed as I walked to my room to get showered and dressed.

I hadn't been in my townhome long. I had moved from my studio downtown after Tanya and I broke things off. Funny thing, too. You would think that I would have moved to a smaller place since I wouldn't technically need more space.

I talked to my dad about it and we both decided that it was a smart investment. Acquiring real estate outside of the bar could only be a positive, especially if I could afford it. I didn't tell him about how I was ready to dig in the dirt and plant some roots of my own. He didn't need to know that part and I wasn't really in a place to explain why I felt that way about it. I'm still not.

It's nice and in a good section of town. There are three bedrooms, two with walk in closets. There is a full bathroom off of the master suite, bringing the total of bathrooms to two and a half. There was a decent sized kitchen off of the large living room. I even had room for a formal dining area in that space. I had the place outfitted with brand new stainless steel appliances and brushed nickel fixtures throughout. My mother had helped me with all of the décor and details, but that probably goes without saying. But my favorite place in the entire structure was the balcony. She had a landscaping friend of hers add all types of planters and lush greenery, making it my favorite escape after a long day. It felt like home to me once we were through. Once I'd felt it, I couldn't shake the urge, so I moved into this much larger place with considerably more space to fill when the logical next step would have been to scale back. _Go figure._

Since Alice and I would be missing our usual Sunday brunch together, I improvised and made something for us here. Scrambled eggs, sausage and waffles for me. Dry toast, G2, and Advil for the lady.

After I sat down to eat, Alice made her way in, looking like death warmed over.

I struggled to hold in my laughter, but this was a rare treat for me.

"You know, I don't think I've ever seen you this plastered, not even that time that one summer when Sam Uley threw that party and you…"

"I remember, Edward, I was there," she said, cutting me off before I could recount one of her less than finer moments from high school. "Let's leave the past where it belongs."

I let her nibble on her toast and drink her G2 before I bothered her again.

"So what happened last night?"

"I don't even know really. I got caught up in the moment, I guess. I met my friend Bella and we went to Angela's for a party she was having. I've mentioned her to you before, haven't I?"

I thought about it and shook my head, I couldn't recall the name.

"Yeah, well, Bella is Rosalie's roommate. I thought you would have at least remembered her name; I've been friends with her since freshman year. Anyway, one minute, we were at Angela's chilling out and, before long, the place was packed and we were all drinking our weight in shots. I must have butt dialed you because I don't remember making any calls. As a matter of fact, I should probably call and check on her, I don't remember her coming back to the party after her blow up with Embry."

"On who?" I asked.

"On Bella. She had a huge fight with her boyfriend; that much I do remember," she said as she began texting vigorously.

I had no idea what she was going on about, but if there was nothing wrong to make her drink the way that she had, I wouldn't stress out over it. She was entitled to a little irresponsible unwinding every now and then.

"Does Rosalie have a boyfriend, Alice?" I figured that would be a good piece of information to get for Emmett.

"No. Why? Are you interested, brother dear?"

"You wish I was, Alice," I chuckled. She was always bugging me to get back out into the dating game. She thought I was still messed up over Tanya, but I never was, really. It just made for a convenient excuse.

"Good, because I think she has the hots for Emmett."

_Oh really, now?_

I would put that question in my back pocket for another day. Right now, I needed to switch into big brother mode.

"You know, you could have gotten yourself in trouble being that drunk, Alice. I need you to promise me that you will stop and take a minute to call me when you realize that you're going to be going overboard. Rosalie was none too pleased to have to concentrate on giving me directions."

"She'll live, but you're right. I'm sorry if I scared you."

She came over and kissed me on the cheek.

"Do you mind if I crash here another night? I don't really want to go to my lonely apartment."

_No, not the puppy dog eyes._

"Oh, so you want to laze around and be sick all over my place, huh?"

"No, I just really want to sleep. I'll never drink again if He'll just let me live. But I'll also feel better knowing that I have you around to get me stuff so I don't have to get up," she said.

_I was such a sucker._

"That's cool. I think you still have some clothes up there if you wanted me to take you to campus in the morning."

"That's perfect, especially since my car is still at Angela's. Sounds like a plan. I'll let you know if I need anything," making her way back to the guest room.

"I'm sure you will, Munchkin."

"Shut up!"

The next morning, I got up bright and early to drop Alice off on campus. This was the first day of the quarter, so I knew she'd want to get an early start.

I took the mustang since it was still nice out. Alice and her hair would just have to be a sacrifice to the convertible gods. We made our way through traffic in a decent amount of time, but I think I sustained more damage from the wind than she did.

"You can let me out here, Edward. I'll walk the rest of the way, my friend Bella is right over there."

I pulled up to the curb and Alice hopped out of the car, grabbing her things along the way. The next thing I know, she's yelling and waving at her friend to stop. I looked up to where she had pointed.

Standing amidst the dandelions and the many students rushing about was the most beautiful, unassuming creature I had ever laid eyes on.

_Who in the hell is that? _

_Is that Alice's friend? _

_Why hadn't I met her before?_

_If Emmett thinks Rose is hot, wait until he meets her roommate. _

_No, scratch that. He can never meet her roommate. _

_I officially call dibs._

_She is absolutely fucking gorgeous._

In that brief moment, I took her in fully, hoping my dark sunglasses hid my wandering eyes. I scanned her from head to toe, noting the flowing, chocolaty brown hair that hung around her shoulders, her hands tucked into the pockets of a fitted gray hoodie, skinny jeans that hinted at a very complimentary form as well as, wait…are those…high top chucks?

_I think I just fell in love. A girl that appreciates the classics._

Alice leaned into the passenger side a bit, pulling me out of my one sided conversation.

_I hope she didn't catch me checking out her friend. She'd never let me live that down._ _Maybe she just dropped something?_

"Ummm, yeah," Alice said. "So, thanks for the ride and for letting me hang out yesterday."

"Of course, Munchkin. Anytime." _Good, I was in the clear._

"And, umm, I'll see you later this afternoon."

_Wait, that's not right._

"Why are you coming in today? I thought you took the night off?"

"Do you see my friend over there, Bella?"

_Shit. She noticed… _

"You mean the girl standing over there?" I asked, pointing to a red head on the other side of the street.

"No, Dipshit. The girl standing over _there_. She motioned in the correct direction with her head. "She's one of the interviews I set up for you and Jazz today."

_Shit._

"I'll see you later, brother dear." She winked at me and was on her way.

_Shit. Shitshitshit…_


	3. This Moment of Clarity

**Housekeeping Items…**

Quotes, songs and lyrics belong to their writers and/or artists.

I don't own anything related to Twilight. No copyright infringement intended.

I do not have a beta, so my apologies in advance.

Hate it or love it…let me know.

A huge thank you to everyone that has read, reviewed, added me as a favorite or put me on alert. I'm still really new to this and your thoughts and comments motivate me. You guys make me smile big time!

**Chapter 3**

**This Moment of Clarity…**

_**Clarity:**_ Clearness or lucidity as to perception or understanding; freedom from indistinctness or ambiguity. The state or quality of being clear or transparent to the eye. –

"_Clarity of mind means clarity of passion, too; this is why a great and clear mind loves ardently and sees distinctly what he loves." _– Blaise Pascal

**EPOV**

_Shit. Shitshitshit…._

I bobbed and weaved my way down the busy streets, barely missing pedestrians, maneuvering my way through traffic like a bat out of hell.

My hands were shaking. My heart was racing, damn near beating its way out of my chest. Adrenaline was running wildly and uncontrollably through my limbs. I wanted to jump out of my car and run a fucking marathon. I'd win that shit, too. I sucked the crisp morning air deeply into my lungs.

Heavily.

In and out.

I could actually breathe. And I could see everything; it was all in high definition, so crystal clear. I'm sure I would've had my head stuck out of the window with my tongue hanging out if I didn't already have the top down on the Mustang. What had been hazy and blurred for so long became real and relevant and true.

I felt wonderful. I felt energized. I felt crazy as hell. But I also felt certain. I hit the button on my Bluetooth and used the voice command to call Jasper while I gripped the steering wheel tighter as I merged onto the freeway.

I had been struck by an odd sense of inspiration that I couldn't fully process. I suppose you could say I had had an epiphany of sorts during the last half hour and it needed to be addressed…immediately.

"Hello?" He answered groggily. I must have woken him up.

_Tough shit. I'm in the middle of a crisis. As my best friend, it's in his job description._

"Jasper, wake up." I said, hoping to get his attention sooner rather than later.

"Edward? Why in the hell are you calling me this early?"

"Get up, man. I'll be at your house within the hour. We've got business."

I pulled up in Jasper's driveway much sooner than I should have.

His house was the wet dream of every living, breathing bachelor come to life. He essentially lived in a renovated mansion that had been in his family for years. It had a huge backyard, complete with swimming pool, fire pit, and basketball court. This place had always been a blast to visit when we were younger. Some of my fondest memories of growing up were made here. We spent much of our time camping or swimming in the backyard or plotting on how to sneak in and out undetected as we got older. We were usually up to no good either here or at my parents' house. But with his parents traveling so much now that they were retired, they had made their estate in Austin, Texas their primary home base. They would come to visit every now and again, but their house here in Chicago was pretty much his now.

I walked up and knocked on the door before twisting the knob and letting myself in. I never really had the patience to wait on his slow, southern ass and today was no exception. He was probably still in bed anyway. His usual routine was to come down and unlock the door before going back to sleep if he was expecting me.

_How you could be thoughtful, but still not give a shit about somebody else's time was beyond me._

I went into the kitchen and started a pot of coffee just as I heard the water being turned off upstairs. A few seconds later, Jasper came down in his basketball shorts and sneakers.

"You said you wanted to talk, right?"

Luckily, I had put on a t-shirt and sweat shorts of my own this morning.

xx _C _xx

Many a conversation had been had under this basketball hoop. Sports, girls, anything that was important to us could be hashed out right here. The bar was equally as good, but not at nine in the morning. There was a time and place for everything.

"Is changing the name of the place really going to have an effect on what you're dealing with right now?" Jasper asked.

We had been playing one on one for a while after I gave him the abbreviated version of my trip to campus this morning. I didn't go into detail about what I felt when I first saw Bella, but I did mention that Alice pointed out one of the interviewees that would be coming by today. He didn't necessarily need to know that I had had an out of body experience over a woman I barely caught a glimpse of and knew absolutely nothing about. And I don't mean that in an Emmett way, either. I simply breezed over it all by telling him I was 'inspired' by the moment.

"I don't see why not. I told you what the name would stand for."

"Don't get me wrong, I think it's a cool name. It's actually cool as shit. I guess I just don't understand everything fully. We can't just go making changes like this whenever the mood hits."

He was right about that. It wasn't a smart financial move to be making big business decisions when I was so full of unidentifiable emotion like this. Damn, I sounded like a hormonal prepubescent girl to my own ears, but there was no way that I was going to be able to make him understand something that I was having trouble wrapping my own mind around. It just made sense to me.

"You're right and I get that. But, I think this is the right direction. After our talk the other night with Emmett, it seems like it could be a meaningful change for everybody involved."

We continued to play for the next little while in silence. I was the one that tended to be moody and contemplative when I was thinking something through, but Jasper seemed to go to a quiet place in his head to mull things over. I didn't mind so much, I knew I had dropped a bomb on him that would affect our mutual investment. Besides, the early morning sun felt good as I worked up a sweat and purged what ailed me, figuratively.

"Ok, I'm behind you, but only on one condition." Jasper said after we called game. I grabbed a towel and he grabbed a water bottle.

"What's that?"

"You need to be the one to tell Alice."

_Fuck._

"That's cool, I can do that. Hell, she probably already knows about it."

With Jasper's blessing, we discussed the strategy I had come up with in the car. I knew I'd have a better chance of convincing him if I had a course of action in place. He had always been a sucker for history and military-like action plans. After an hour or so, I looked down at my watch.

"Alright, I'm going to head back uptown and get things started. I'll see you this afternoon."

"Noon, Edward. Don't be late for these fucking interviews."

"Am I ever late, Jazz?"

"When it's for shit that you want to do? No, not at all."

"Even when I'm late, I'm on time."

He gave me the finger and went back inside.

I slipped my earpiece in and dialed the sign company that we had looked up as I made my way back to the car. Next would be the printer and a few other vendors we had decided on to implement the changes we wanted to make. Emmett would be next because there were some errands that I needed to run before I had to be at the bar for interviews and someone would need to meet said vendors.

After that, well, I was going to send Alice a text message and hope for the best.

**BPOV **

We arrived at Midnight Blues and, thankfully, I managed to keep myself right side up. As we approached the building, I noticed that everything was extremely immaculate and clean, however, the place where you would imagine a huge, elaborate sign was - blank. _Weird._

I stopped and pointed. "What's up with the sign, Alice?"

"Oh, yeah, I forgot about that." She said with an exasperated huff.

"Apparently, the boys decided this morning that they wanted to rename the place. They have a huge marketing blitz lined up to start next week, but they decided to rename it from _Midnight Blues_ to _Clarity_."

I had to chuckle at that. Alice was what you would consider a 'planner.' Spur of the moment wasn't usually her style.

"I'm surprised you let something like that go down." I said.

We both paused for a moment to look at the blank space. I stood with my hands behind my back and she stood with her arms crossed over her chest. _She was actually pouting!_

"It stands out like a sore thumb when everything else is all 'prettified' and put together." I bumped her in the side in an attempt to make her smile. Her face was all scrunched up like it caused her physical pain that I had noticed it.

She sighed, but still didn't smile. "You're right, it's driving me crazy, but they only took it down this morning. The new one should be here tomorrow. Edward is _way_ worse than I am when it comes to things being in and out of order," she giggled.

"Did you ask them why they decided to change it so abruptly?" I asked.

"Of course I did, but neither one of them would tell me. Emmett just laughed when I asked him, so I suppose it's an inside joke or something. Come on, we don't want you to be late."

We walked in and the place was nothing like I pictured it.

You think of a bar and your mind automatically associates it with one specific description or another. You have your dive bar, singles bar, sports bar, cop bar, college bar; the list goes on and on. This place didn't fit into any of those typical molds.

It soon became clear to me why it was so appealing to so many different people.

The foyer was a very nice size. The floor was made of marble. It was a cream color with subtle streaks of blue and green running through it. Tall, wooden pillars gave the space a regal look. As you would expect inside any fine dining establishment, we were immediately greeted by a large hostess stand, topped with the same marble as the floor and surrounded and enclosed by smaller pillars. You could easily fit three or four people back there at once.

_They must do a whole hell of a lot of business. _

Behind it was a dark paneled wall with two archways flanking it on either side. To the right of the hostess station was a massive coatroom and a hallway that lead to the men's room. Situated to the left was another corridor leading to the ladies' room.

I could see how some would immediately peg this place as stuffy or formal by the entryway, but those thoughts would be knocked right out of the park the moment you came through the archways. It opened up into a huge, two story facility. The walls were a bright, strange shade of blue, not dark like you would assume with a name like _Midnight Blues_. They were almost a baby blue, but not that pale. It was the perfect shade of blue, really.

We walked in further and I noticed the dark, mahogany wood of the massive bar that was strategically placed in the center of the room. It was surrounded by barstools and was clearly meant to be the focal point since it wasn't placed against the wall like most bars. I remembered this same rich coloring from the foyer. It could be found throughout, lining the walls and the crown moldings. It offered a nice contrast to the vivid colors found everywhere else, from the table linens to the window treatments.

It didn't come across as pompous at all; it actually struck me as both simple and classy.

There was eclectic art donning the walls with various shades of blue moving amongst the reds, greens, oranges and purples of each piece. It was subtle, but blue was always the dominant color. They blended in with the décor, tying the large space together. The tables and chairs of the dining area were spread out over such an expansive space that it felt as if we were surrounded by a moat.

Alice led me further still, crossing into another open area connected by a much larger archway. From the outside, it hardly seemed possible that so much could fit into this place. There was a shiny mahogany dance floor in the center, lots of space aged looking sound equipment, a gigantic DJ booth and an exquisite baby grand piano just off to the left of the room. A spiral staircase leading to the second floor sat behind it. High top tables and chairs with dramatic centerpieces were sprinkled throughout, making it easy for guests to enjoy some dancing and entertainment after dinner. Each centerpiece featured candles, flowers, or stones, all in varying shades of blue.

The ambience of this place was a myriad of different things. It was professional and stylish, yet relaxed and inviting. It was elegant and refined, yet vibrant and fun. Somehow, the new name _Clarity_ made total sense.

I stood in awe of my surroundings until I heard a pair of footsteps approaching leisurely from behind us.

My attention was turned once Alice grabbed my shoulders and spun me in the direction of the footsteps.

_Holy Mother of…_

"Bella, I'd like to introduce you to my brother, Edward Cullen, and his best friend and co-owner Jasper Whitlock. Gentleman, this is Ms. Isabella Swan."

I believe I used the word 'vivid' when I described some of the colors that I'd come across as I walked through the establishment known previously as _Midnight Blues, _now known as _Clarity_. People, I have made an _egregious_ mistake in my usage of the word and, for that, I sincerely apologize.

I've never seen a more vibrant, vivid, tantalizing, delectable shade of the color green in all of my life. And this comes from a girl that grew up in the rainy, vegetation filled town of Forks. They were beautiful.

I took in a sharp inhale as I looked into the eyes of the man standing in front of me. I had thoroughly misunderstood what I saw whizzing past me this morning in that fuck hot car; I hadn't nearly given it the credit it deserved. I just stood there, entranced. I looked at him. He looked at me. I looked at him some more. I knew I should be saying something, anything, but I couldn't get my brain to work fast enough. I was literally tongue tied. On top of that, I could feel my cheeks starting to burn with reckless abandon.

_Shit. Shit. Shit._

I must have looked like a deer caught in the headlights because the god among men standing before me seemed to take my silence as his queue to rescue me from myself.

"Isabella, it's a pleasure to meet you. You come highly recommended by Alice."

I could feel a grin spreading across my face, but I was able to rein it in before I started to look insane. I glanced down at his outstretched hand and fought tooth and nail with my desire to touch him before I was able to convince myself that my limbs were acting accordingly. It would be rude to not shake the hand that he had extended to me first.

_Soft and supple. _

Those were the only two words in the English language that I could muster up to describe the feel of his hands. Before I could tackle those adjectives and wrestle them into the gutter where I wanted them, I noticed a buzz of electricity coursing between his palm and mine. It was so faint, it was actually more of a hum, but it was there nonetheless. I'm not sure what it was exactly, but now was neither the time nor the place to try and find out.

_Come on, Swan. Get your life together before you make an ass of yourself._

I made eye contact with Edward once I'd grabbed a hold of myself, partly to let him know that I wasn't ready for the loony bin, but mostly to make sure that he was real. He was most certainly real. He was real chiseled, really tall, really lickable and most certainly really gorgeous.

I licked my lips as I retrieved my hand and was greeted immediately by his partner whose presence had fallen by the wayside as soon as I laid eyes on Edward. He damn near snatched my hand away; he had taken it into his own so quickly.

"Ms. Swan, the pleasure is mine," Jasper said as he lightly brushed my knuckles with his lips.

I could feel my face flaming up again on contact.

My hand wrapped around my throat on instinct; I was so taken aback by both of these men. They are young and ambitious and going after their dreams, one venue at a time. They struck me as a dynamic duo that wouldn't stop at one successful business, not by a long shot. I'd figured all this out without even having a proper conversation with either of them; that's just how intriguing their auras were or something.

Neither of them could be much older than Alice and I, but Edward was the older sibling for sure. From what Alice had told me, he and Jasper were childhood friends much like Rose and I were. Jasper was no slouch in the looks department, either. He had honey blonde hair, piercing blue eyes and he was only a bit shorter than Edward. He had to be at least 6'2" and Edward still stood taller.

Alice pulled me from my analysis by clearing her throat. I took that as her way of telling me to get back into business mode. I was going to do just that. There was no way in hell that I was walking out of this place without making a damn good impression on these guys. However, Alice and I would need to have a serious discussion on how grossly unprepared and misinformed I've been. She could have warned me. Rose could have, too.

_What had she called them? Friendly and fair? She was supposed to give me the good shit…_

"Have a seat, Ms. Swan," Edward said, gesturing towards a chair placed across from two seats that were side by side behind a desk. It was out of place in the otherwise impeccable design and set up, but I assume they had it set up this way for all of the interviews they would be holding.

"Thank you," I said, smoothing out my skirt as I took the seat. Jasper sat down as well, but Edward seemed to linger behind me. Jasper looked up at Edward, smirking and arching an eyebrow at him.

_I wonder what that's about._

Edward took his seat and cleared his throat. "So, Isabella…"

"Wait, I'm going to have to stop you right there." I said. I thought for a moment to make sure my next words didn't come out as bitchy or rude as they usually did.

"I actually prefer to be called '_Bella'_. Not '_Isabella'_ and definitely not '_Izzy'_."

I paused to make sure they were still with me. They just stared at me with blank expressions like most people do during this particular discussion, so I took that as my queue to continue.

"If you could, I would simply prefer to be called plain old '_Bella'_. If I'm being honest with you both, I will find it difficult to answer to any other variation that either of you may choose to come up with. It's a deal breaker."

They both looked at me with identically raised eyebrows before Jasper burst into a fit of laughter. My blush crept its way back up to my face, but I figured that it would.

"Maybe I should just call you Sweet Cheeks then, hmm?" Jasper chuckled, nodding towards my face and wiping the tears away from his own as he pulled himself together.

_Hmm, this one is a bit of a smart ass. He'll be fun to get to know._

I smiled, not wanting to confirm if I was ok with his choice of nickname or not and the interview officially got underway. I felt as if I was in front of a firing squad once it actually started, but I think I met them toe for toe considering the barrage of questions they were throwing at me. Most were surrounding my background and work experience. Jasper surprised me by asking one that I hadn't expected.

"So, Ms. Swan, if you were to obtain this position, how would your boyfriend or significant other take to your being busy most weeknights and weekends? Between work and school, that would put quite the strain on your social life, don't you think?" he asked.

It was such a personal question, but this was a social job of sorts, so I could see the relevance.

_Sort of._

"Well," I paused, giving the question some thought before I answered, "I would like to believe that anything worth having in your life is worth making time for and that any significant other would not only appreciate, but also support my drive and ambition to support myself financially through school."

_That was a good answer, right?_

They looked at each other again, almost having a private conversation that I wasn't privy to. Suddenly, I felt the need to quantify an important part of my statement.

"However, because I do not currently have a boyfriend or a significant other, as you put it, it's a non-issue."

_There. I will work my ass off in this place, if given the opportunity. I'm a poor college student that can't keep a boyfriend. I don't want to, but that's neither here nor there because I want to keep our lights on. Hire me!_

Once they finished asking questions, Edward and Jasper both stood.

I followed suit and shook both of their hands with confidence. Alice appeared out of nowhere while Edward walked us both to the front door. He thanked me for my time and, after glancing over at Alice, told me they would be in touch, making no solid commitments.

Before I knew it, we were outside, leaning against the bright yellow Beetle.

My head was spinning and I released the breath that I didn't realize I was holding.

I looked over at Alice expectantly as I ran my fingers over the bun in my hair and caught my breath. She wouldn't make eye contact with me, but you could tell she was struggling not to laugh at me.

"I told you so. Let's go get dinner…and a drink." she said.


	4. CRUSH

**Housekeeping Items…**

Quotes, songs and lyrics belong to their respective writers and/or artists.

Sadly enough, I don't own anything related to Twilight. No copyright infringement intended.

I do not have a beta, so my apologies in advance.

Hate it or love it…let me know.

A **huge** shout out to everyone that has read, reviewed, added me as a favorite or put me on alert! There are more and more people following my story and

I thank you all for taking time out to add me to your rotation.

It's simply awesome.

Feel free to let me know what you think since I'm writing this as I go. I'd love to hear from you!

**Chapter 4 – C.R.U.S.H**

_Why do they call it a crush? Because that's how you feel when they don't feel the same way in return. – Anonymous_

**EPOV**

"I like it." Emmett said.

We stood on the other side of the street, watching the workers as they put the finishing touches on our brand new sign. The company we had hired came through with the rush order. You could say that I was pleased, but that would be a gross understatement. The silly grin that I couldn't wipe off of my face could attest to that.

The sign was awesome. It was perfect and _exactly_ what I envisioned. It looked like it had always been there, like it belonged…

_Damn. I guess I could say that about a few different things nowadays._

I tried to hide my grin and knew I was failing miserably. I hadn't stopped smiling since Isabella; I mean Bella, came in for her interview yesterday.

I stood at the door after Alice and Bella walked out to her Beetle. That car was just right for her, so little and bright and cheery. That yellow would have been a god awful choice in any other scenario, but for Alice? Perfection…

I watched their exchange from the window, hoping they wouldn't know I was there. I noticed the relief that washed over Bella's face after she stopped her nervous fidgeting. I truly hoped she hadn't worried about doing well in her interview. She had blown her competition out of the water. She was sharp, witty, and she consistently spoke her mind. Having a back bone would take her far in this position. We needed help in the kitchen, but more so in the bar area. However, someone that would be comfortable filling in for both areas would be a major plus. The fact that Bella could roll with the punches and could maneuver through the unexpected like she did when Jasper asked her about a significant other proved that point.

"_However, because I do not currently have a boyfriend or a significant other, as you put it, it's a non-issue."_

I sighed deeply at the memory. She had admitted, of her own accord mind you, that she wasn't spoken for. That fact alone had me on cloud nine. The hope that I felt flooded my system, splishing and splashing its way through my very being. I could feel it settling over my fears while it uncovered brand new ones. As a potential new hire, I would need to walk a very fine line if I decided to pursue her.

I _almost laughed at myself just then. _

_Of course I was going to pursue her…_

She was everything we could hope for in a potential employee. _Maybe even more._ She was overqualified, really. I knew I would have to speak with Jazz, but as far as I was concerned, she had the job before she even got here.

I turned around once they drove off only to find Jasper standing against the bar with a strange little gleam in his eye. He was watching me watch them.

"What?"

"What do you mean what?" He asked, trying to conceal his smirk.

"Just what I said, you freak. What?"

He was analyzing me. I hated when he did that.

It was weird how thoroughly he could feel people out, even when we were younger. You could be doing your damndest to hide a certain feeling or emotion and he always picked up on it. It was uncanny how in tune he could be with someone he had just met. He knew me well, so his radar was probably ringing off the charts.

I hadn't realized that he'd be able to pick up on my infatuation so quickly. True enough, I was out of practice because I hadn't really cared about anything in so long. I should have been more aware, but I had no way of knowing that I would feel much more than that initial physical attraction, _so_ much more. There was an instant, undeniable connection once I actually had the opportunity to meet Bella; to talk to her; to look into her eyes; to touch her. _She had the softest skin I had ever touched in my life…_

"Umm, you might want to put a cork in that," Jasper said as he went behind the bar and poured a drink.

"Fuck you."

I had forgotten he was even here for a minute.

"Out of all the ladies that we saw today, I have to admit that I like young Bella the best."

"Hmm." That was all I was willing to give as an answer, but it was all he needed to continue.

"And, by the vibes you're throwing, I think it's safe to say that you agree?"

_He's such a smug bastard._

"Yes, I liked her a lot actually." I answered coolly, opting to try and cover up my defensive posture before he could pick up on it. "She's at the top of my list of candidates. There's nothing wrong with that."

He raised an eyebrow, noting my automatic defense.

_Shit._

"No, there isn't. But why ever would you think there would be something wrong with it? We _are_ supposed to be discussing all of the candidates at the conclusion of interviews. We're simply discussing the business at hand."

I waved my little white flag as I made way to one of the bar stools.

_Fuck it. There's no reason to fight it._

"I can see that you find this very amusing."

"That I do. But, now I'm even more intrigued."

I looked at him, waiting on his question. I could see that he had one, just waiting to claw its way out of his smart ass mouth.

"What?"

"Well, let's take a look at the facts." He began ticking each one off by raising a finger. "There's a dreamy, faraway look in your eye. There is a noticeable rise in your heart rate. You have an unmistakable twinkle in your eye. I'm also feeling a slight tinge of déjà vu in the air – a few nights ago in a little hole in the wall bar if your memory is as sharp as mine. So, now the question is, what is it…exactly?"

_Motherfucker._

I knew I could beat around the bush some more, but that would only encourage him. I could keep him guessing all I wanted; try playing coy about my obvious crush. But there was no use. I knew that, in the end, I was just going to tell him anyway. This wasn't about games.

"I don't know what it is, Jazz. I have no idea. There's just something about her." I met his eyes before I continued. "I think, right now, I'm just thrilled by the fact that I'm going to get a chance to see what that something is."

His expression showed that he was surprised by how easily I gave in, but he could also see that I was being 100% genuine. You have to keep in mind that I knew I wasn't your typical head case and I usually made him work for it. Like I said, though, this was serious. I couldn't explain it and there simply wasn't anymore to say than that. His expertise may come in handy, though, so I needed him on my team.

"When was the last time you used the term thrilled in reference to a woman?"

"Probably never."

"You said you were hit with 'inspiration' when you saw her this morning?"

"Yeah, I suppose I did say that."

"And you have been smiling ever since she walked in the door."

_I guess my smiles are few and far between if he feels the need to point them out._

"Ok, I'll take your word on that."

He regarded me silently, tossing back his shot. "Well, that could be _something_, right?"

His eyes held a deeper meaning, an underlying understanding of what this could all mean for me.

I thought back to our night at Tequila's, feeling my lips curl up as I remembered that fleeting moment of jealousy that raged through me, flooding my entire being, as Emmett put a voice to both his fears and his revelation. I wanted that. I knew that for sure when my path crossed hers. The longing that needed to be filled, the missing part of my painting, it was her.

Or at least I thought it could be.

I liked to think that I was a fairly good judge of character. I couldn't read people like Jasper, but I had a knack of my own for seeing through bullshit people when I met them. I knew nothing of Bella, but I knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that she was anything but bullshit. I damn sure wanted to learn more in regards to what she was about and that alone spoke volumes to me.

I wanted a shot at something real, something special, and something beautiful. From what little I knew, she was all of those. I also wanted something that was mine. From what little I knew, she could be that, too.

My best friend handed me a shot as he poured his second. We toasted.

"Yeah, that is _something_."

We put the topic of Bella on the back burner and talked about the other candidates that had come in that day. While they paled in comparison, we did have a few that would make the cut. We decided to call back three of them: Gianna, Bree and Leah. Bree and Leah would be hired on specifically for the bar while Gianna had extensive experience working in a restaurant setting. Bella would be our wild card, being trained to excel at both.

"Good, I feel a whole lot better having a full crew again." Jasper said, stretching after his fourth shot of Don Julio.

"A little bit tired?" I asked, knowing it would piss him off. "Come on, you used to be able to drink me under the table."

"I still can, you pussy, but I'm pacing myself. It _is_ only Monday." He said. "I'll handle the call backs in the morning, but I don't think I'll have them come in until next week."

_A week?_

No, that was altogether too long for me to go without seeing Bella again. The thought caused me physical pain. I had way too much work ahead of me as it was to just start from scratch. I wanted, no, I needed to get this plan into action, even if I didn't have the plan just yet.

"Ok, that sounds good. But I was thinking, since Bella would need the most training, how about I go ahead and do her call back? That way, we can get her in here as soon as possible…to shadow Rosalie and Jessica during their shifts? Rosalie would be an excellent mentor for her. After all, Alice says they're roommates, she makes the most in tips by far and knows how to handle both areas."

That sounded like a believable plan, even to my own ears.

Jasper wasn't fooled, though. "Sounds like you have this all worked out."

I chuckled as I grabbed Bella's resume and contact information. "Far from it, my friend. Far from it."

We parted ways moments later. It was highly unprofessional, but I didn't give a fuck. I had a phone call to make.

I couldn't help the satisfaction I felt while standing right outside our very own successful establishment, watching random workers loading up their supplies after another random job. Little did they know they were putting the shiny new ribbon on what would be the birthplace of a new start for me, be it a good one or a great one. This could be the start of a good friendship, or a great something else. I didn't want to jinx it. Bella was inside with Alice going over paperwork that I could really and truly care less about. And I've been smiling like a lunatic ever since.

I clapped Emmett soundly on the back as the workers packed up their truck. "I like it, too. A lot."

xx_C_xx

**BPOV**

After dinner and a couple of drinks, Alice and I made it back to the apartment. Rose was in the living room, spread out on the floor. Books and papers were strewn around the room while she sat in the middle of the floor typing furiously on her laptop. Her eyeglasses dangled on the end of her nose. She even had a pencil stuck in the middle of the hair, piled high on top of her head.

She looked up once she heard the door close behind us, smiling brightly.

"Ladies! You're back! How did it go?"

I had been giving myself a stern pep talk ever since we left Clarity. I wasn't going to get my hopes up about this job. I did my best, I knew that much, but I wasn't going to set myself up for disappointment. The deed had been done. If I got it, I got it. If I didn't, then it would be on to the next one.

I shrugged, "I don't know. It went."

"That's bullshit, Rose. She did fabulous. I'm sure she got the job." Alice interjected.

"I'm sure you did great, Bella. They made me sweat before they called me back. That's what they do." Rose said.

I shrugged again before plopping myself down on the couch and kicking off my heels.

_Which reminded me…._

"Speaking of making you sweat, why did you two leave out that little bit about how fucking gorgeous they were? I had to pick my jaw up off the ground so much I didn't think I'd be able to answer the questions."

They both broke out in fits of laughter, but I didn't see what the hell was so funny.

"They are yummy, aren't they?" Rose said, rubbing her palms together.

_That's the understatement of the year._

I could feel myself starting to flush just thinking of all the naughty things I could do to that brother of Alice's. Jasper was edible, too, but there was something about Edward, something ridiculously tasty. His name alone did strange things to my nervous system. I unconsciously started to fan myself with a piece of loose leaf on the cushion next to me. I might have been better prepared to deal if I had known. Maybe I wouldn't be lusting over one of my potential bosses.

_That's not true. I'd be lusting anyway._

They didn't need to know that, though. "A little advanced notice would've been helpful."

They both chuckled a bit at my expense. I just rolled my eyes. They were always finding me funny when I acknowledged a man.

_Tramps._

"Anyway, yeah, yummy is a good word." I said, hopefully bringing an end to the dynamic duo and their appeal.

We all sighed a little in agreement with each other.

"So Bella, what did you think of my brother?" Alice asked.

_Shit._

I had wondered when she would ask me something like that. We had made it through dinner without her putting me on the spot. I should've known she would wait until she had Rose at her side so they could jump me. But, it _was_ an intriguing question. What _did_ I think of her brother?

I could tell her how absolutely fine and fantastic he was, but I'm sure she had heard that same old story a million times in her life. I could tell her how his ambition made him all kinds of sexy to me. I could go on for days about how the velvety smooth sound of his voice made me want to do bad, filthy things.

What I couldn't tell her about was the electricity that crackled around us whenever I looked into his eyes today. There was a slow burn behind them that I didn't understand, but damn it if I didn't want to. It left me breathless. I couldn't tell her that there was a pull, strong and sure, that I fought with every time I stood on my feet. That the there was more than one occasion this evening where it was just he and I in that room, how she and Jasper and anybody else that may have passed by just drifted away.

With Rose being so touchy lately, I knew that it would be best for me to keep my auto blush to myself, especially with the business with Embry so fresh. We still hadn't finished with that and it just wouldn't do for her to be on guard in her misguided attempt to protect me from myself if I did, in fact, get this job.

"I was very impressed. I think he and Jasper are going to be very successful businessmen."

_That was a good answer. Not too much, not too little. Smooth…_

"I hope they call, though. I bet the tips are amazing in that place."I said, again, trying to change the subject.

"They're more than amazing, Bells. You could easily keep the rent paid after a single busy shift. If you work as much as you've been talking about, you won't know what to do with all that income, damn the bills." Alice said. I was starting to get excited at the prospect the more she spoke.

"You'll fit in great and, with that cute shape you've got going on, you'll be a top earner I'm sure."

"Like hell she will," Rose said, looking up abruptly from her laptop. "You're my best friend, Bells, but you'll have to get through me to take that title."

I was never one to back away from a challenge, especially not from Rose.

"Oh, really now? Then, game on, _Miss Hale_. Game. On."

We stared at each other, unflinching.

"Oh geez," Alice said.

We both spat on our palms.

Alice cringed.

I leaned over from my spot on the couch while she scooted towards me with her laptop pressed firmly against her chest so we could shake on it properly.

"Eww, I can't believe you two do that. It's just gross," she said.

"Hey, it's either spit or blood. You gotta bind it." I said.

Whenever Rose and I placed a bet or challenged each other to something, we made a rule that it always had to be 'bound.' It had to be unbreakable. Charlie, my dad, was a Trekkie to the extreme and we had gotten the idea one night from watching an episode of Star Trek with him. The Klingons took a blood oath, pledging that they would follow through on whatever it was they were talking about, no matter what. We watched them cut their hands with huge, razor sharp swords. It was then, and only when the blood was dripping, that they shook on it. They actually allowed their blood to mix, signifying their indestructible promise to each other.

We were glued to the television set, both of us watching with wide, curious eyes.

Never did we think there was anything in the world more binding than saying '_back back no trade backs_.' Surely, nothing could be more serious than the infamous _triple dog dare_. It just wasn't possible. This oath solidified both their promise to each other and the obligation in their words. That was all that mattered to us. We didn't know the other meanings or connotations behind such a ritual and I honestly don't remember much of the episode after that. Since we were eight at the time and the sight of actual blood made me nauseous, we had to think of something else that we could use. It was then that we decided spit would work just as well.

_Besides, we were tomboys back then and pinkie swears were lame._

"Get over it. You know how we operate," Rose laughed.

Alice didn't say anything; she just shivered a little as she grabbed her phone and ran to the bathroom.

"Did you get to meet Emmett?" Rose asked out of nowhere as she went back to her typing.

"Who's Emmett?" I asked.

"Uh, big guy, looks like a bear that ate a football player? Curly brown hair? Adorable dimples?"

_Adorable?_

My eyebrows shot up immediately as I watched the realization of what she had just said wash over her face.

She squeezed her eyes shut, but the damage was done. I wanted to ask why I had never heard this name before, especially with the glowing description she just gave.

"Emmett had been long gone by the time we got there," Alice answered for me as she made her way back into the living room, curling up on the couch behind Rose with her cell phone in hand.

"Oh, ok. I just wondered." Rose said, focusing her attention back to her keyboard.

I was still staring at her. "Oh no, you're gonna have to do better than that. _Who_ is Emmett?"

"He's just a guy. He works at Clarity, heads up security."

My eyes narrowed.

She started to sweat.

"He's really nice and I just wondered if you had the chance to meet him while you were there, that's all."

Alice tried to muffle her laugh. Rose threw a throw pillow at her.

"Aww. That's _adorable_. Do you have a crush, Rosalie?" I sang. Not many things on the planet could make Rosalie Hale uncomfortable, so I took full advantage whenever I came across one.

"No, I don't." She said.

I just looked at her.

"Stop it! I don't."

I was still staring, eyes blank.

"Bella! I do not!"

"Yes. You do." Alice deadpanned.

Rose threw another pillow.

I couldn't catch my breath, I was laughing so hard. Tears gathered as I tried to control myself. Just then, my cell phone rang.

Glancing at the clock, I saw that it was just before nine at night. I looked over at the girls who were both grinning like banshees. Alice was literally bouncing in her seat with both of her hands in the air, fingers crossed.

I picked up the phone, but I didn't recognize the number that popped up on the screen.

I answered it anyway.

"Hello?"

"Hello, may I speak with Bella Swan, please?"

"This is. May I ask whose calling?"

"Sure, uh, this is Edward Cullen, from Clarity." _Velvet._ "Did I catch you at a bad time?"

"Umm, no, not at all. What can I do for you?" _Ha! That one's too easy…_

"Well, I didn't plan on calling you so late in the evening, and I do apologize for that, but I simply didn't want to wait make my offer to you on behalf of myself and Jas – I mean, Mr. Whitlock. We would like to offer you a full time position at Clarity."

I looked at the girls and smiled. Edward didn't wait for my response.

"We can be very accommodating to your schedule as I'm sure school is your main priority, but getting you on the books as a full time employee instead of a part time one would allow for more options in both training and scheduling. We'd also like for you to be trained extensively to accommodate both the bar area and our standard diners, so time is of the essence. Is this something that you'd be interested in?"

I wanted to play it cool even though I was vibrating with excitement, much like Alice. I had a job. Not just any job, either. It was a good one. This could be something that would carry me through school, taking a tremendous weight of off both my back and Charlie's.

Then I realized that I hadn't given him an answer yet.

"Yes, I would definitely like to accept your offer." I said, drawing on the excitement of my best friends as they did a little happy dance around me.

If I didn't know better, I would say that I heard a sigh of relief on the other end of the line.

"Great. I know it's short notice, but I was hoping you'd be able to come by some time tomorrow to start some paperwork?" Edward asked.

"Tomorrow would be great, actually. I have an early class in the morning and then I'm done for the day."

"Excellent. You and Alice can work on a fitting schedule once you're done with your training phase. I don't anticipate it to take very long for you."

"I appreciate the vote of confidence, Ed – I mean, Mr. Cullen." I hadn't had very many bosses, but I thought a more formal moniker seemed appropriate, even if he was Alice's brother. I wanted to start off right. I didn't imagine many bosses to be so encouraging, especially considering he hadn't seen any of my work yet.

"That sounds great," he said. "I look forward to seeing you tomorrow."

My stomach did a flip flop at his words. "Likewise. I will see you tomorrow."

I don't know why, but my heart raced at the very idea.

xx C xx

I dressed down a bit since I had to go to campus before heading downtown to Clarity. Alice said it wouldn't be a problem since I would be wearing a uniform once we opened, but I would want to be comfortable during the day. She would be going over my paperwork with me while I would go over policy and procedure with either Edward or Jasper, she wasn't sure which.

I was nervous and it would be a long day, but I was so excited. Not many had the chance to work with both of their best friends. They were great people and I knew I would learn my way in no time.

I put on a white tee and a snug pair of dark washed skinny jeans. Sitting on the bed, I tied my chucks and went over everything in my head. I had shaved in the shower and tucked some black hose and black heels per her instructions. I wore my hair down with a thick black headband, curling it tightly so it would fall just so and I wouldn't look like a total bum once the dinner shift started. I had no doubt that it would be busy, even though it was only a Tuesday.

Before I could stand up, there was a knock on my door and Rose poked her head in.

"You decent?"

"I try hard not to be. What's up?"

She came in and looked at me with a nervous expression. Rose didn't really do nervous. I wanted to ask her if something was wrong, but she started talking before I could.

"You ready? Don't be nervous because you'll do great. The paperwork and policy stuff is boring, but you'll probably be with me during dinner and I'll show you the ropes. Jessica is alright, but just smile and nod while you're with her. She can be a bitch and a half and gets off on feeling like she's in control. You'll get more of a lesson in what not to do if you go to any tables with her."

I just chuckled. "I'll keep that in mind."

I checked myself in the mirror and grabbed my messenger bag off of the bed. Rose was still standing in the door way, shuffling from one foot to the other.

"Ok, what's going on? You look kinda green."

She was gorgeous as usual, of course, but she looked like she was going to be sick to her stomach.

"No, no, I'm good." She brushed an imaginary piece of dust off of her Juicy Couture sweatpants. She had mentioned having to go in early for her weekly clean up shift, so she was also dressed down for the first part of her day.

"Are you sure?" I was really starting to worry about her.

"Yes, I'm fabulous. Great, even." She fumbled with something behind her back. "Listen, I know you have a lot on your plate today, but could you do me a solid?"

"Sure, Rose. Whatever you need."

She looked back and forth between me and the floor for a moment before she brought her hand from around her back.

"If I give you this, do you think you could give it to Emmett? If you see him?"

I looked down at the pink, folded piece of stationary covered in red and pink roses that she held. That was her favorite stationary; her signature. She rarely ever used it, reserving it only for special occasions and correspondence.

She clutched the note tightly.

"Sure, I can do that. Is there somewhere that I can leave it if I don't see him? I'll be training, so I'm not sure where I'll be."

"No!" she yelled, but composed herself quickly. "I mean, no, don't leave it anywhere. Just keep it if you can't give it to him yourself."

"Ok, ok. Calm down. I'll keep it on me and if I see him, I'll give it to him. If I don't, then I won't."

"Ok. Ok, yeah, that's good." She was still so nervous, but was visibly trying to calm down. If I was being honest, she was freaking me out a little. I had never seen her this way. "Ok. Thanks."

"Not a problem." I said as I grabbed my jacket and headed for the door.

"Oh, and Bella?"

"Yeah Rose?"

"Don't read it, ok?"

Now _that_ was a request that I would not, could not, guarantee. Instead of lying to her, I smiled and slid the note into my back pocket. As soon as I got out the door, down the steps and into the lobby, I whipped it back out.

_No spit was involved, so I was in the clear._

I opened it slowly, as it was folded just so:

_C is for your confidence - Boy I love the cool in you.  
>R is for the rumors they make - I wish that they were true.<br>U, you put a smile on my face - you're unforgettable.  
>S is for your sexiness.<br>H - I gotta Have it.  
>I gotta crush on you - I love me some you.<br>A big crush on you - I love me some you.  
>A big crush…<em>

_What the fuck? Are we back in middle school?_

I read it again to make sure I had read it correctly the first time.

I was torn. There were two things that I wanted at the moment. First, I wanted to turn back around, run up the steps and tease her unmercifully, but then I also wanted to turn back around, run up the steps and hop up and down, squealing with my best friend like a fan girl.

But I couldn't do either because she'd be kicking my ass for reading it.

I thought it over and came to one, simple conclusion.

_How fucking cute is that?_

I made my way to the train, beaming with happiness for my friend. She had an honest to goodness crush on a boy. Well, on a man, I'm sure, but it was such a wholesome and innocent sentiment for her. The Rose that I knew was bold and brash and straight forward to the extreme in both her words and her expressions. She could be scary in an either you love it or hate it sort of way. She rarely put herself out there for anything or anyone, unless it was something she cared about.

_This must really mean something to her. _

I couldn't wait to meet him. As I made my way across campus, I began to consider what I would do if I were ever in that position. For example, what would I do if I ever gained the courage to admit to the percolating crush that I could feel beginning to grow within me for a certain pair of steamy, green eyes? They seemed to be looking back at me anytime I closed my eyes.

_The note thing didn't work too well for me in the eighth grade, so I'd have to come up with something else if I ever found myself in that situation._

I could see it now. The age old 'Do you like me? Circle yes or no.' Yeah right. Maybe the old me would have been a sucker for love and done that, but not now. I couldn't put myself out there like that, certainly not again. I didn't have the luxury of allowing myself to let anything that felt even remotely like infatuation cloud my head or my judgments; especially not in regards to my interactions with my new boss. No, not going to allow myself to go back down that road. Not worth it when it inevitably comes falling down, crushing me like it always has.

_No sir. I'm not gonna be able to do it._

I pushed those bubbling feelings down, deep and low into the pit of my stomach and focused on Rose and her new found happiness. Soon to be, anyway. Whoever this Emmett was would be a complete tool if he didn't jump for joy once he got his hands on Roses' little love note. I was familiar with the song and I could see her totally dancing around in her bathroom and singing into her hairbrush.

I did, however, allow myself to consider the possibilities if, for conversations sake, I was an old sucker for love, all the way to the doors of my lecture hall.

xx_C_xx

**EPOV**

I could have waited to call Bella to offer her the job. The paperwork could have waited for sure. I just couldn't stand the idea of waiting to see her again. A combination of desperation and brilliance helped me come up with the idea of bringing her in a little earlier than the other girls we hired. The guise of paperwork and getting her started on training under both Rosalie and Jessica was my salvation. Bella would be our multitalented addition if it killed me.

I went to the gym to let off some of my nervous energy before heading home. My fingers literally itched to dial the number on her application. I called Alice first to get an idea of whether she'd be available to talk or not since they had gone out after the interview.

"Alice, why are we whispering?"

"I snuck off to the bathroom. I didn't want her to know I was talking to you. She should be surprised by your call."

"Oh, okay. That makes sense. So she's with you and she's free to speak with me?"

"Yes, but you should call her even if she's not. Are you going to tell me now, brother dear, or do I have to wait you out?"

I was momentarily stunned. I had expected this reaction from Jasper, at least eventually, but was floored by Alice seeing through me so fast.

_I'm losing my touch._

"Tell you what?"

"You know what!" she whisper yelled. "You totally have the hots for Bella. Admit it."

I cringed because Alice would never let this go. It wasn't enough for her to know due to her borderline precognition or to tell you that she had a feeling about something. Oh no. Alice usually wanted the confession.

"Alice, what are you on about? I think Bella is a nice girl from what I've seen and I want to bring her in sooner rather than later. I think she could be a valuable asset to the staff."

Silence. Complete silence other than the sound of my own heart pounding in my ears.

"Yeah, ok. Like I said, I'll wait you out."

I sighed, resigning myself to the fact that everyone will know about my crush before everything is said and done.

"You do that. Listen, I'll see you tomorrow, I need to make another call."

xx_C_xx

We crossed the street and headed back into the bar. Everything looked awesome. Aside from the new sign being installed, we had received all of the menus and placards with the new name and design scheme on them. Emmett had done well with overseeing the receipt and installation of everything that was to be delivered.

The upcoming marketing blitz would be executed flawlessly by Alice and Jasper, I was sure of it. They usually worked together well and would have our new name buzzing around the city in no time. I was especially impressed by Alice and her enthusiasm, considering she still didn't know the full reason for the change.

It wasn't for a lack of trying to find out, either. She had sent me a couple of text messages throughout the night trying to get an answer as to whether or not I liked Bella. She wasn't in middle school anymore and I was older than her, so I just ignored those. When she started back up with phone calls this morning, she went in on me about why we had changed the name. I really didn't care about telling her, but she was starting to grate on my nerves about it, so I didn't.

I glanced over and saw Alice and Bella sitting at the bar, reviewing some of the paperwork that Bella needed to sign in order to get on the payroll and other various human resources items. My nerves relaxed entirely, all evidence of grating falling by the wayside. She looked amazing in her curve hugging jeans and fitted tee. Her hair bounced around her shoulders and I wanted to reach out and touch the silky strands. I could get lost in just looking at her and she was going to be coming in and out of here on a regular basis. I was beside myself with all of the possibilities. At that very moment, she absently flung her hair behind her shoulder as she and Alice laughed about something or another. I was hopelessly lost to her. Her smile absolutely lit up the room…

Yes, everything was coming together nicely.

I pulled myself together and approached them, remembering to be in boss mode and not the mouth breather that I felt myself becoming.

"Good morning, ladies," I said. "I trust everything is coming along over here?"

Bella looked up at me and smiled as I stood next to her stool, then looked away as if she had caught herself and disapproved of the action.

_Oh no, we absolutely can't have that._

I kept my hand placed firmly on the back of the stool, resisting the urge to touch her hair or lift her chin like I longed to.

"Definitely. Bella is officially a member of the _Clarity_ family," Alice said, grinning a little too sweetly for my liking.

She tapped her stack of papers a little bit harder than she needed to against the bar and gave me one of _those_ smiles. You know the kind, the sort of smile that's so forced you end up smooshing your nose and squinting your eyes? Yeah…that one. She wasn't happy with me at all, but gave a good front for our new employee.

"I'm glad to hear it. Bella, why don't you grab a drink and we can start going over the policy and procedures that you'll need to have on file."

"Sure, Mr. Cullen, thank you," she said as she stood up, barely making eye contact with me.

It took a bit of effort on my part, but I wanted to appear unaffected by this shy version of the woman I met yesterday. She was every bit as enchanting, but I would have to find a way to at least make her comfortable enough to talk to me. If I couldn't, then I'd never get close enough to get…well, closer.

"Great, I'll meet you back at one of the tables near the piano in about ten minutes."

She nodded and turned to walk away from me, completely ignoring the step down that she needed to take away from the bar. Before I could grab her, Emmett had his arms firmly wrapped around her, effectively keeping her from falling flat on her face.

"Hey there, Little One. We don't want you falling and trying to sue us on your first day," Emmett said.

You could see the horror and embarrassment flicker on Bella's face, lighting it up like a Christmas tree, in a beautiful shade of pink blush. She covered it up with a nervous laugh while I ran my fingers through my hair, relieved that she was in one piece.

"Sorry about that. Also, thank you. I'm Bella and I tend to do things like that often," she said as she extended her hand for Emmett to shake.

He returned it in kind, but scooped her up again for a hug, lifting the poor girls' feet off of the ground.

"Nice to meet you, Little One. I'm Emmett," he said.

Not wanting to intrude on their meeting anymore than I already had, I made my way upstairs to get some of the things that I wanted to review with Bella. I also needed a second to shake the irrational jealousy that was again running rampant throughout my body. I wanted to be the one to sweep her off of her feet. That could have been a great opportunity for me to show her she could laugh and smile and hell, make eye contact with me. Yes, I was her boss, but damn it, I wanted to be more.

_I needed to get my shit together. Quick._

I splashed some water on my face before making my way back down the steps. It wouldn't do for me to be wearing my emotions on my sleeve the way that I had been. As I placed my papers down, I noticed that Bella hadn't come in to start our session yet, so I took the opportunity to get us both a ginger ale or something from the bar.

Employees were starting to arrive for their pre shift clean up, so I hoped Bella was delayed because she was meeting some of her new co-workers. Grabbing a bottle and a couple of tumblers, I looked around and noticed Jasper and Alice sitting together at the end of the bar in what appeared to be a heavy conversation.

_Nope, not even gonna go there with them today. When Jasper wants to talk to me about it, he will._

I chuckled to myself as I continued to do a visual sweep of the area. I made note that Jessica was mopping the foyer in shorts that were way too short for front of the house, Rosalie practically ran to the kitchen area with her laptop bag clutched tightly in her hands, and Mike was walking back to the DJ booth. While I noticed all of this random activity, none of it held my attention for too long.

Then, all I could see was red.

I didn't even notice the sound of glass breaking as the two tumblers I held shattered as they made contact with the floor.

Emmett was standing by the front door, leaning down so Bella could whisper into his ear. She reached into her back pocket and pulled out…a pink piece of stationary? She placed the intricately folded piece of paper carefully into his hand, placing her free hand firmly on his bicep. She closed his fingers around the paper and held them there. She had yet to move her lips from their spot, playing dangerously close to his earlobe.

I blinked. Then I swallowed. Then I blinked one more time to make sure my mind wasn't playing tricks on me and I wasn't seeing things.

It took everything inside of me not to collapse onto the floor into an epic temper tantrum, the likes of which would have made three year olds all around the globe lift their sippy cups with pride.

_No fair! I called dibs!_

xx_C_xx

Uh oh…


	5. You Got Me Wide Open

**Housekeeping Items…**

Quotes, songs and lyrics belong to their respective writers and/or artists.

Sadly enough, I don't own anything related to Twilight. I do own my original characters and my original story. No copyright infringement is intended.

I do not have a beta, so my apologies in advance.

Hate it or love it…let me know.

**Hey! Thanks to everyone that has read, reviewed, added me as a favorite or put me on alert!**

**Sorry for the delay! My attempts at posting once a week have been an epic fail, but know that I'm trying. Reviews from last chapter put a big smile on my face as I had gone without internet for a few days after my neighborhood had a lightning strike. Strange…**

**Chapter 5 – You Got Me Wide Open**

_Sometimes I'm confused by what I think is really obvious. But what I think is really obvious obviously isn't obvious. – Michael Stipe_

**BPOV**

_Sweet. I'll get to take care of Rose and her situation before I have a chance to get busy and forget about it. _

How awesome was it that Rose's boy toy would be the one to come and save me? His timing was perfect, in more ways than one.

"Uh, Emmett, I'm really glad that I've had the chance to meet you before I get into any heavy training for the day."

He immediately stood up straighter and smirked down at me.

_Uugh, he probably thinks I'm hitting on him._

"Is that so?" he asked, grinning from ear to ear.

"Yeah, your name precedes you."

"Totally," his smug confidence was written all over his face.

_Idiot. Why are all guys such idiots?_

I had to admit, though, his smile was infectious. And his dimples _were_ pretty adorable. Otherwise, I might have thought he was a douche bag. Instead, I smiled right along with him. He was very well built, tall, protective by how he came to my rescue before I could do a full on face plant. He was very much _Rose_. I could immediately see what she saw in him.

"Listen, could I talk to you in private for a minute?"

"Sure. What's up, Little One?"

I cringed at the nickname he seemed to have grown fond of as I dragged him towards the entryway, right outside the foyer. The girl that was mopping had a set of headphones on, so I didn't think she'd be privy to what I was going to say. Just in case though, I signaled for him to come down to my height so I could be sure. This was information of the most sensitive nature, after all.

When he was close enough to my face, I reached into my back pocket. He watched as I placed the note into his hand and closed his big, meaty paw around it, making sure to hold his fingers there as I began to whisper, attempting to explain what I was doing.

"Okay, I know you don't know me and this feels all kinds of weird because I don't know you either and I'm not completely clear on what I am and am not allowed to tell you."

He paused and stood up at his full height again, looking down with lines of confusion spread all along his massive forehead.

_Damn, he's huge. Like, linebacker huge, for sure._

"Come back, I'm not done."

He looked at me warily, but came back down to my level. I grabbed onto his arm to make sure I wasn't in danger of falling, again.

"Look, I'm not sure if you know who this is from, so I'm not gonna spill the beans totally, but once you _see_ it and think about how the contents are being presented to you, you may have an idea. I was asked by my _roommate_ to give you something and I believe it to be something extremely important to her."

There were only a few breadcrumbs to leave, so I hoped he would pick them up and follow me.

I paused, wanting this last part of my rant to be clear.

"The one thing that I can say for certain, though, is if you handle this information poorly, I will find a way to hurt you." Stepping back to reassess his size, I wanted to amend that statement. I'd had plenty of self defense training, but I'd need every last bit of it if I couldn't get a clear shot to the baby maker. "Some kind of way."

He looked down at his hand long enough to open his fingers. He examined what I had placed in his palm. Understanding dawned on his face and relief dawned on mine once he registered the multitude of roses and the distinctive, pink girliness of the paper. He tucked it safely into his pants pocket and regarded me with a satisfying sense of appreciation.

"Fucking A. I can see you're gonna be one tough little new hire."

"Tough enough to take you on," I said with a smirk of my own.

I watched him walk away from me, tapping his back pocket. I couldn't help but smile. The package had been delivered successfully and this Emmett of hers wasn't a jerk off that I'd have to hate. Actually, I got the feeling that he would make a great partner in crime.

I glanced at the time. We were way past the ten minute mark and I didn't want to have Mr. Yummy waiting for me. _I'm going to have to work on a better nickname for him._ The thought alone of having the time to work on one without becoming a stalker made my insides curl up like a fan girl. I was getting ready to sit directly across from him while he taught me all about the rules and regulations of Clarity. I would be a good little student, too. I would be both engaged and interested. I would even stay late for extra credit if he wanted me to. My participation grade would be _phenomenal_!

I had to shake my head before the mental images of leather and lace and being taught a fabulously long, hard, and fast lesson took over my mind completely. I was slowly but surely stepping into the danger zone. But just because I couldn't pursue him didn't mean I couldn't pursue him in my head…

_Hell, I might be able to teach him a few things. A few nasty, dirty, wonderful things…_

_Shhh. Bad Bella…_

After I had thoroughly chastised myself this morning for even entertaining the idea of letting myself get caught up again, I decided that the best course of action would be to stay in a neutral zone of sorts. However, that plan was already proving itself to be easier said than done.

When he came up behind me and Alice and placed his arm ever so gently on the back of my stool, I just wanted to lean in and tuck myself soundly into his embrace. I wanted him to wrap his arms around me and I wanted him to hold on. Tight. I wanted to breathe him in, all sandalwood and cinnamon, while I licked the column of his neck to see if the taste matched the delicious smell. I don't think he even wore cologne, or at least he hadn't around me so far. Maybe it was his aftershave, but my brain registered it as pure Edward. I could actually imagine what it would feel like to touch him, all lean and strong...

_Whoa._

That line of thought just wouldn't do. It was officially time to get my head in the game. I couldn't allow myself to get too far ahead of things. I would be pleasant, professional, and polite. I couldn't let myself get too close to him. At all. I knew that if I did, I wouldn't stand a snowballs chance in hell.

It surprised me to see him standing near the bar, but I was relieved that I hadn't kept him waiting. I walked towards him, noticing that he was in a heated exchange with Emmett, the expression on his face pure fire.

What the hell could've happened in the span of ten minutes?

**EPOV**

Jasper was at my side in an instant.

"Edward, what's going on?"

There was no way for me to answer him without looking like the pussy he already thought I was. I just stood there, clenching my jaw and my fists at my side simultaneously. _Is she watching his ass while he walks away? Son of a…._

"Edward?" Alice asked, touching my arm as if I needed the comfort.

I jerk away, not really meaning to offend her, but knowing that I wasn't in any position to let my true feelings show at the moment.

"Nothing." The lie tasted bitter as it sat around in my mouth, lying awkwardly along the surface of my tongue. "I'm fine."

That one hurt like a bitch. It felt like chewing on my own kneecap. I swallowed hard as I tried in vain to pull myself together. Policy and procedure still needed to be reviewed with _Ms. Swan_ and I was just the motherfucker to do it right now.

Jessica had obviously heard the glass break and promptly ran in to start cleaning up the mess. Any normal person would have grabbed a broom and dust pan to sweep up the dry glass. But no, Daisy Duke opted to bend over right in front of me as she picked up each jagged piece with her hand, too worried about not missing her opportunity to think about cutting herself.

"Oh, for the love of…" Alice sighed as she left my side and went to give Jessica back some of the dignity she didn't seem to have.

Before I knew it, Emmett was approaching me and I had to fight the urge to knock his head clean off of his shoulders.

"Hey, Edward," he said.

I just glared at him.

"That Bella is a cool chick. I think she's gonna fit in here pretty well."

I glared at him some more, feeling the heat of my anger rising up each column of my spine.

"Hello? Earth to Edward?" Emmett said, a look of agitation crossing his face.

I still couldn't form any words, at least none that would end with us still being friends. I just concentrated on keeping my hands at my sides and not spitting on him.

"Emmett, not now," I said between clenched teeth.

_I'd have to go see the dentist soon if I kept this up._

"Dude, your mood swings are seriously giving me whiplash," he mumbled.

My head snapped up in his direction as soon as I heard him speak. He couldn't possibly be serious. The rational part of my brain knew that he had no way to know that I had my eye on Bella. There was no way that he could predict I would be considering Bella as the future mother of _my_ children. What I couldn't reconcile was how he was saying the same things about Rosalie not too long ago.

"What was that?" I asked as I approached him.

It was all fun and games when the errant thought had passed through my mind when I dropped Alice off the other day. My subconscious _knew_ that he would drop his crush on Rosalie as soon as he met her roommate; I knew it and I'd said it. But fuck me if I was going to stand around and watch it happen without having my say.

"Are you fucking kidding me with this?" I asked as I moved further into his personal space. We would have been nose to nose if I was a little taller.

"What? What did I do?"

"You've got to be fucking kidding because I just saw you and Bella…together."

He looked at me like I had another head growing out of my neck.

"Um, yeah, I know you did. That's why I came over here to tell you that I thought you and Jazz had done a good thing by hiring her. She's a cool ass chick." He said. The only thing missing was the 'duh.'

I closed my eyes tightly, willing myself to back away. Again, my rational mind knew that Emmett would beat the brakes off of me, but the other part of my mind simply didn't give a fuck. I hadn't even had a chance to decide whether or not I thought Bella was a cool ass chick or not. Emmett must have seen the frustration running through me.

"Man, you need to fucking relax. You have been a flake like corn here lately. You go from being normal Edward one minute to being a sensitive bitch the next _way_ too easily for me. _What_ is your problem?"

I didn't want to tell him my problem. I shouldn't have a damn problem. I should be whispering and sharing notes and stories. We should be taking long walks and having extravagant dinners. We should be celebrating holidays and taking lavish vacations. My problems should be trying to get out of helping with our wedding planning and convincing Bella to start making babies with me sooner than later. We should be checking stock options and investing for retirement together. I wanted to be the one to do that. But somehow, I had allowed the chance to pass me by.

While I was both shocked and utterly appalled by how fully my disappointment ran, I sighed, conceding my defeat.

"Sorry, Em. I'm fine; I just had a bad moment there for a minute."

He looked me up and down, but finally uncrossed his arms from around his chest.

"Whatever dude."

I couldn't expect him to say much else considering I had just had a silent nervous breakdown right in front of him without even trying to justify it, but he'd be alright. He was the type that would forget all about it by the middle of the evening. He'd probably be ducked off in a corner somewhere, sucking face with Bella. _My_ Bella.

_Asshole._

I felt utterly defeated. I felt like I was just catching my breath and finding a meaning behind all of this hard work. I was getting closer to finding the one thing that might make me happy. That wouldn't be happening now. I was down for the count without ever throwing a punch.

I ran my fingers through my hair while taking deep, cleansing breaths. I leaned against the side of the bar and took a moment to survey the scene. I hoped no one had caught wind of our little one sided sparring match.

Jessica had finished cleaning up and was headed towards the door, no doubt going home to change per Alice's intervention. Emmett was scanning the room with his head hung low, trying to be incognito but failing miserably.

_Asshole._

I rolled my eyes, feeling every drop of my fantastic mood from earlier drain away, leaving me with only myself and my brooding thought process. I would never begin to understand how I could have messed this up so badly. I thought we had some sort of a connection, a means to a future end together somewhere in the cards.

Whenever I looked into her eyes during her interview, I could have sworn I saw the slightest hint of a sparkle, calling to me and beckoning me to reach for it. I guess I was wrong about that. I guess that twinkle in her eye was just that… a twinkle in her eye. It had nothing to do with me. She had made her decision and I'd have to abide by it. _Nobody said I had to be happy about it._

I looked down at my side and there stood Bella, watching me closely with those pretty brown eyes of hers. _Damn._ I hadn't even felt her approach. Then again, maybe I did. Maybe that's why I was able to calm down so quickly.

_Shit._

Emmett still looked around the room, but I thought he had been covertly trying to locate Bella.

_Hmm. That's strange. She's right here and he hasn't even looked in this direction. _

_Of course he didn't, he doesn't have the connection that you have with her._

_Damn right._

On the inside, I smiled smugly, but on the outside, I knew what I had to do. I would have to be as cold as ice to keep anything that I held on the inside from oozing its way to the outside. If she was gonna be my best friends' girl, I'd simply have to treat her that way. It would kill me every time I had to do it, but I would. It would be bull shit for sure, but I'd live.

My back straightened and I went behind the bar to get two more glasses. Fuck it, I was still thirsty.

"Are you ready for our review of Clarity's Policy and Procedure Guidelines, Isabella?" I asked in the most authoritative voice that I could muster.

"Uh, yeah. Sure," she whispered.

If I didn't know any better, it looked like her face had fallen just the teeny, tiniest bit. That was probably just me and those dreaming eyes of mine, though. She had definitely taken a pause as she realized what I'd called her and how I'd said it. She had made her choice and we would be employer and employee, nothing more. I could be strong. I could be a bastard. She could live with it just as I would have to.

On second thought, this was a very bad idea with me being in the mood I was in. I was the last person that should be doing this, but it couldn't be helped at this point. I would have asked Jasper to step in for me, but he and my sister were now noticeably absent.

"Let's go, then. We are behind schedule and I trust that you will make a better effort to be prompt in the future." I hissed, passing her by and making my way into the next room with her trailing behind.

I was being _petty_, I knew that. _Childish_? Abso-fucking-lutely. But, in my own defense, I had the right to be that way; at least until I got over whatever the hell it was I was getting over.

Going against her wishes and calling her by her full, government name would be my first step toward recovery. Well, second step. The first was admitting that I did, indeed, have a problem. I was man enough to do that, but I wasn't sure if I was man enough to handle it well. What had Emmett called me a minute ago? Yeah, a sensitive bitch.

I was an ice cold, sensitive bitch…

xx_C_xx

We sat down for our review and the tension in the room was palpable.

"So, have you enjoyed your first day with us so far, Ms. Swan?"

The smile that I had plastered on my face was so tight that it hurt.

She shot me a puzzled look, almost as if she was unsure of how she should answer me.

"Yes, yes I have, Mr. Cullen."

_I'll just bet you have…_

My emotions were all over the place. I was seething on the inside. I wanted to call bullshit on everything that had happened from when I had first laid eyes on her at Northwestern to this very moment. It wasn't supposed to be this way. I wanted to do this smoother.

"Right, then."

I slid a handbook across the small table to her, resisting the urge to lace our fingers as she picked it up from its spot. Maybe in a different time and place, I would have said to hell with it all and just done, my friendship to Emmett be damned, but I was a loyal friend. I couldn't just forgo his feelings to satisfy my own. And what about Bella? What about her feelings?

The little demon in my head said that she didn't share my infatuation; he told me that she had made that point with full clarity.

And just like that, I breathed fire directly into my pissy ass mood all over again. Picking up my own copy, I proceeded.

_The sooner we start, the sooner we can get this shit over with._

"This handbook is designed to acquaint you with all of the inner workings involved with your employment here at Clarity. It contains all of the policies that have been established to maintain order and a positive work environment."

She nodded and I continued.

"We reserve the right to make changes with or without prior notice. Everything that we will review together will be common sense. This should all make sense to small children. Can you handle that, _Ms. Swan_?"

She looked up at me immediately from behind her own copy of the handbook. Disbelief, then anger blazed prominently behind her mahogany irises, turning them almost black.

"Alright, Isabella. Please stop me if you don't understand something or if I move too fast for you." I said.

_Fine._ If this was the way my mind chose to cope, then who was I to stop it? Emmett could go ahead and add condescending bitch to my new list of nicknames.

xx_C_xx

**BPOV**

You know, the more I thought about it, I realized that I was wrong…so wrong.

Turns out, Jasper was nice. Emmett was cool. But Edward? Edward was kind of a bastard.

I sat and watched all of my delicious, high definition, naughty girl fantasies run totally down the fucking drain. I sat and listened to this jack ass talk to me like I was in the third grade trying to get my first lemonade stand off of the ground.

No, I wasn't an enterprising entrepreneur that modeled for GQ in my spare time. I had absolutely no experience with this line of work. He knew that when he hired me. But gone was the moral support and encouragement that he showed in me from the night before. It felt as if I had disappointed him in some way. He still regarded me politely, but that just made me feel worse. Something had changed, drastically. He was suddenly acting like I was stupid. _Dumb and stupid._

The weight of that realization was heavy on my shoulders. How could I do a good job when I knew that my boss had already decided that I was incapable of grasping the simple themes in this booklet? The way he made no qualms about showing me that he thought I couldn't handle asinine things. Things like knowing a drunk motherfucker when I saw him, being polite when I served a table, or maintaining my personal hygiene was seriously pissing me off.

_Ol' Dirty Bastard. Maybe that could be his new nickname…_

I think my breaking point finally came at the one hour mark. That was when he made mention of the current dating policy.

"Isabella, while Clarity has no specific policy in place that forbids pursuing more "personal" relationships with your co-workers, we do ask that you carefully consider the consequences of such actions. I trust that you can contain yourself enough to keep any _booty calls_ or _grope sessions_ out of the public eye?"

_Huh?_

"And if you could _begin_ to conduct yourself with some form or _illusion_ of discretion, then that would also be superb."

_Yep, that did it._

"Listen, you condescending, self righteous prick. You act like I'm some ding bat whore in heat that just waltzed in here off the street. I have been nothing but friendly and respectful to every person that has crossed my path since I walked into this place and I'd _love_ to know who you think you are to talk down to me the way that you have been."

By this time, I was on my feet, shaking with anger and spitting at him like a dungeon dragon.

"In addition, how I handle my romantic dealings is none of your damn concern, but I can assure you that sliding down a stripper pole is not my thing. I'm not sure what bug crawled up your ass this morning or if maybe you being a nice guy was all an _illusion_, but I have enough assholes in my life without having to deal with this."

I don't remember ever being this mad. Not with Reilly, not even with that jack ass Embry.

"You guys all done in here?" Emmett asked out nowhere. He waltzed in eating a bag of potato chips, completely oblivious to what just happened.

He didn't wait for either of us to answer before walking over to me.

"Cool. Hey Bella, I'm headed home to change, but I wanted to thank you again for giving me that note from Rosie. I've been crushing on her since I met her and would have died trying to figure that shit out if it hadn't been for you. My pansy ass friends couldn't help me for shit. Anyway, I asked her out and we're going on our first, real date. So, I owe you one."

You could almost see the happiness seeping out of his pores.

_At least one good thing came out of this cluster fuck._

I grabbed a tight rein on my emotions, not wanting to be nasty to someone that had been nothing but nice to me. I did my best to avoid his eyes as I tucked a stray piece of hair behind my ear.

"I'm glad I could help. You and Rose will be great together, Emmett. If I don't see you, it was so nice to meet you today."

His smile faded as he looked at me more closely.

"What's up, Little One? What am I missing here?"

I fought back my tears, refusing to let that ass wipe see one single drop. He didn't deserve the satisfaction. I gave Emmett a watery smile as I made a bee line towards the exit, hoping to find the room where I had stashed my stuff. It was a cute little dressing area that the female employees used to get ready for the dinner service. I crossed my fingers that I could find my way back without Alice there to guide me.

First, I needed to do one more thing.

I turned and made full eye contact with Edward, mouth wide open, still glued to his chair.

"Oh, and _Mr. Cullen_? Just in case I wasn't _clear_, I quit."

**EPOV**

_Astounded. That was a good word._

I was astounded at how I'd fucked this up beyond repair. I had made a mountain out of a single gnat's ass. To add insult to injury, I had done it for no good reason.

"Rosalie…" I whispered to no one other than myself.

I don't know if I was astounded by what she had said or by how outraged she had been at my behavior.

Bella had been so quiet and shy towards me all morning. I knew I was good at being a dick, but she was like night and day, lit up like a Christmas tree when she stormed out of here. And sexy as fuck, if I was being honest.

I was completely astounded at how stupid and insecure I truly was. Even more so that she hadn't quit an hour ago.

'_I can assure you that sliding down a stripper pole is not my thing.'_ Had I really insinuated that?

_Bravo, Cullen. Bravo._

"What the fuck did you do now?" Emmett asked, balling up his now empty bag of potato chips.

He stood over me after we had both watched Bella leave. He had clearly missed her chewing my ass out, but now he wanted an explanation about what part of the show he _did_ get to see.

"It would appear that I may have misunderstood some things." I said, hoping that being vague would be enough.

It wasn't.

He tilted his head a bit.

I just sighed as I pinched the bridge of my nose.

"I went to the bar to get a drink for Bella and me since we were getting ready to do her Policy Review. Once I got it, I noticed you two talking by the door. I must have misinterpreted what I saw. I thought she was slipping you her phone number. I misunderstood your body language."

Perplexed was another good word to use. That's exactly how he looked.

"Why the hell would you think that? Didn't I explain to you dummies how I felt about Rosie? Wasn't that just the other night?"

I didn't have a good answer for him. I sat there, chewing on my thumb nail.

"Is that why you broke those glasses, because you thought she was hitting on me? Why would you even care if Bella gave me her num…?"

He didn't finish; the silence hovered between us as the puzzle pieces fell into place for him.

"You like her! You wanna knock her boots, don't you?"

I winced at how eloquently he had summed up my situation.

"Among other things, but none of that matters now. You saw that for yourself."

"Why doesn't it matter now? Could it be because you handled it like a dumb fuck? What did you say to her?"

I gave him the short version of our review session. He looked almost as angry as Bella did.

He left without saying another word to me. A few seconds later, the tiny terror that is my sister came barreling in. She was probably going to cut me.

Her hands were on her hips as she tried to level me with her death glare.

"Seriously?" She asked.

"Alice," I pleaded. I didn't need her trying to make me suffer more. I would make sure that I did a thorough job of that on my own.

"Seriously," she repeated. "I seriously can't believe you treated her that way."

"Alice, I don't even…"

"No, you had your turn. You shut the fuck up and listen this time. I'm your sister and I love you and I put up with your shenanigans with that single fact in the back of my mind, but I won't let you blow this."

She was a little late with that, but I knew when to keep my mouth closed and this was one of those times. I hadn't noticed that she was inching closer to me as she spoke.

"I don't know what you said or what you did, but on every single thing that I love in this world; you had better find a way to fix it."

Alice had handed me my ass before, several times, in fact, but never like this.

She closed the gap between us and put her small manicured finger squarely in my face.

"Fix. This. Now."

xx_C_xx

Dinner service was starting and I couldn't bring myself to care.

Rather than getting all spiffy for my managers shift tonight, I sat at the bar, tossing back the Jack that I had been cradling since the mess I made this afternoon. When the night first got started, we liked to keep it mellow with soft jazz or something else soothing and generally pleasing to the masses being piped through the speakers. _Damn that._ Tonight was different and I had Bootsy Collins playing.

_Hell, I thought it was soothing and anybody that didn't like it could just kiss my ass._

I had destroyed my chances, that much was clear. Alice said I had to fix this. Okay, I could understand that. She told me to fix it _now_. That would be a little bit tougher for me to swing. That had been a couple of hours ago and I still hadn't seen her. On top of that, I would probably never see Bella again.

_Got to be,  
>Got to be the freak of the week.<br>You'se a fine mutha funka  
>And I met my sexual peak.<br>Freakin', speakin', and peakin'  
>I got to get some of that love.<br>You were sent from above,  
>So can't we just push and shove? <em>

_Hey Hey Hey…_

I let the bass of the music flow through me. Bootsy Collins was one of the best creators of funk of his era _and_ this one. I loved the classics and his music was one of my guilty pleasures, being introduced by some friends that Jasper and I used to hang with in college while enjoying 'herbal' refreshment.

I'd been a fan ever since.

"Are you fucking kidding, dude? How is this appropriate right now? You've got this playing while people are trying to order fucking appetizers." Jasper whisper yelled into my ear. He was bartending tonight, but I couldn't really hear him.

As I looked up, I saw Alice walking in from the foyer with Bella in tow. They sauntered past Jasper and I as we watched from the bar in stunned silence. Alice went between cutting her eyes at me and smiling at Jasper. Bella stared down at the floor as if she had found the pattern of the wood grain fascinating.

They didn't stop, walking straight through to the kitchen as if nothing had ever happened today. Jasper and I exchanged a confused look as Bootsy kept on singing, like he was sitting here at the bar drinking Jack right along with me.

_Sittin' on a groove and I wanna play…  
>Just checking out the moves that you display,<br>you got me wide open, you got me wide open…_

Everything was all hazy and techni-colored at the same time.

Her dark brown hair hung in loose curls down her back, a little teased up in the back, framing her face beautifully. Her shapely legs never seemed to end in the black mini skirt and heels that she wore thanks to Alice and her decision to put all of the girls in 'tip insuring' uniforms. Her white blouse was opened just enough to show the most delicious sample of cleavage that I had ever come across. It molded to her small, tight form in the perfect way. It wasn't slutty or trampy like some of the get ups that I've seen coming and out of our doors. It was flattering and unbelievably sexy on her. Suddenly, the suggestion of a stripper pole didn't seem as awful as it sounded.

_God bless those damn uniforms…_

xx_C_xx

**My husband, who has also been serving as my pre-reader (thanks babe!), let me know that I've been remiss in not including my playlist. **

**Since it's still pretty short, here's the list so far:**

**Cupid's Got a Gun- Shanell ft. Nicki Minaj**

**Something – Drake**

**Moment of Clarity – Jay Z**

**C.R.U.S.H – Ciara**

**You Got Me Wide Open – Bootsy Collins**

**Check them out when you get some free time! I'll try and post links to my profile as the list grows. They are a major, major influence on how this story is going to play out and, since this is a work in progress and you guys are my readers, let me know your thoughts so far, what songs move you or what you'd like to see happen! I'll shout you out and appreciate you bunches!**


	6. Let it Go

**Housekeeping Items…**

Quotes, songs and lyrics belong to their respective writers and/or artists.

Sadly enough, I don't own anything related to Twilight. I do own my original characters and my original story. No copyright infringement is intended.

I do not have a beta, so my apologies in advance.

Hate it or love it…let me know.

**Shouts out to MamaJoyof3 and …**

**You guys give me a kool aid grin!**

**Chapter 6 – Let it Go**

Most of us women like men, you know; it's just that we find them a constant disappointment.

– Clare Short

**BPOV**

I found the room that Alice had taken me to when I first got here this morning, before she insisted on giving me the full tour. The kitchen was ridiculous, something that even Gordon Ramsey would have to give props to. It was clean enough to eat off of any surface you wanted to; immaculate just like every other nook and cranny in the place. I had caught a glimpse of the cleaning schedule that Edward was in charge of and he kept that thing in heavy rotation.

_OCD seemed like the type of problem a fucktard like him would have to deal with._

I quickly located the cubby where I had stowed my stuff, unzipping my bag and tossing in the essentials, the wallet and lip gloss that I had put in my pockets this morning. I ran my hand over the unopened garment bag that hung there. It held my brand new, pristine black and white uniform.

_I bet it would have been cute as hell on me, too._

I looked around the elegant space, essentially a glorified locker room like you would find in a prep school full of prissy girls. I couldn't help but wonder what could have been had I just stuck it out. I hadn't quite made myself comfortable here, but it was easy to see that I could have. This would have basically been my second home if my bullshit meter could have just stayed at a simmer. Instead, I had let what Edward said to me get under my skin and, instead of a simmer; I was experiencing a rolling boil.

_Fuck it._

I grabbed my shit and bailed.

Who the fuck was he, anyway? Where did he get off calling me a two bit hoochie mama and why had I let it bug me like this? I could have shot him a snarky remark and rolled with the punches, but instead, I flew off the handle. I couldn't regret giving him a piece of my mind, but I did regret the quitting part. This arrangement was heaven sent and I squandered it over somebody else's bullshit.

It would have been nice if this had been the first time, fool me once and all of that, but it wasn't. Many of my meltdowns had been blamed on the actions of others, but the one common denominator was always me and my shit. I could have dealt with this in a much more constructive way.

I had made it halfway down the street, headed toward the bus stop, by the time Rose had caught up to me.

"Bella! Bella, wait up." She was out of breath, having run from the kitchen to catch me, I'm sure. "What happened back there?"

I toed the concrete with the tip of my shoe, hands shoved into my pockets. Truth be told, I was now embarrassed at how I had reacted and didn't know how to justify my actions. Embarrassing myself? I could handle that. Things had to look pretty bad on both Rose and Alice.

"It's hard to say, Rose. I'm not entirely sure that I know what really happened myself."

I could feel her gaze as she willed me to lift my head. Rose was one of the few people that I could always be honest with. She made it hard for me to forget that.

"Bells? Just tell me about it."

I immediately thought back to that night when my situation with Embry had hit the fan. I had my suspicions that he was playing around on me, confirmed them when I had caught him once, even twice, but I didn't want to judge him on my past experiences.

"_For real, Embry? I couldn't do it for you like this whack bitch could, huh? Is that what you're telling me?"_

"_Bella, wait. I don't know what you're talking about, but I can explain this."_

_How he planned to explain having Emily Young posted up on a wall, fucking the shit out of her, would be entertaining to say the least._

_But between the vodka and the predictability of this night, I simply wasn't in the mood._

_I blasted through Angela's bedroom door, shaking the picture frames clear off of the walls in the hallway._

_I had to get out of there._

_I needed air, fresh and pure, unlike this stifling fog that whirled around me. Between Embry's bold faced lies and the drunken stares of everyone at this party, I thought I was going to hyperventilate._

_Embry grabbed my arm and yanked me back before I could make it out of the back door of the apartment. My salvation._

"_Will you just hold the fuck up? Damn, Bella. You're always so fucking full of drama. Why do you always do this?"_

"_Me? I did this? I stuck my dick in the first thing that smiled at me? You're still buttoning up your damn pants!"_

_The apology in his expression quickly morphed into a different one, one that told me he wasn't about to let go of the fact that he felt his actions were justified._

"_You're such a fucking contradiction, Bella. You used to be just as into me as I was into you, but you're so hot and cold. You don't even give me the time of day anymore."_

"_Why the fuck should I? I may not ever understand why I'm doing the best that I can, but I have been and I am. Now, I have to see that bitch on campus. I have to look her in her eyes and see that she's had half of me. Shit, Embry. She's not even half the woman I am and you're fucking her at a house party!"_

_I heard Rose say that once and it felt right in the moment. She wouldn't care that I stole her line…_

"_Please save the theatrics for once! We've been fucked from the beginning and you know it! You haven't tried to make this work for shit!"_

_At this point, I wanted nothing more than to curl up into a ball and cry. Everyone was getting a front row seat to my latest failure, to my world tumbling down around me, once again. _

_I didn't see Alice or Rose around. They were probably still with Angela taking shots. _

_I was on my own and I felt like I wasn't myself anymore, like I was having some sort of out of body experience._

"_You know, I only give you a hard time because I can't keep going on like this, pretending like I haven't tried to forget! I wish I could trust you, but I can't forget all the times I've caught you, balls deep, in some shit! I really thought I could forgive you, but it's not the same. You lied to me, Riley! You lied to me over and over again and I can't keep doing this."_

"_Riley? That fucker again?"_

_I shook my head, not understanding the question he had asked._

"_What?"_

"_Riley. You called me Riley, Bella."_

_Even in my inebriated mind, I knew I was in over my head…on so many levels. _

_I turned and closed the gap between myself and the escape of the back door._

"_If you weren't happy, you could've told me."_

_And with that, I was out the door, running away from something that I still didn't have the strength to take on face to face…_

_Yeah, that hardcore self destruction really happened._

I knew I had been permanently damaged by Riley, but deep down I didn't want to be. I didn't want to admit just how extensive that damage was, not even to my best friends. I had a feeling they knew, Rose could always see through me and this time was no different, but I didn't want to look weak or let them see just how insecure I was as a result of my time spent with him.

"I don't know, Rose, the day has just been really weird."

I went to sit on the bench at the bus stop and Rose joined me as she listened.

"I met Alice when I got out of class like I planned. She showed me around, gave me the usual HR spiel like I expected, but then I got ready to meet with Edward to go over policy and procedure and everything just...changed."

"What do you mean by changed? I'm sorry, but it's not adding up." She said.

"Well, let me think. I took a short break after my meeting with Alice because Edward needed to get some stuff before ours. That's when I met Emmett. He caught me before I could fall off of the stool I was sitting on. Once everybody dispersed, I thought I could use that time to take care of Operation Roses."

"What?"

"Yeah, Operation Roses. I figured I could be stealthy and give him your note without anybody else around. I figured you'd want that to be done on the down low by how you reacted this morning, right?"

"Umm, yeah. Thanks for that, by the way."

_Ohmifreakingod! Rose is blushing!_

I nudged her in the side. "Come on, now. You know better than that. I've always got your back."

"You read it though, didn't you?"

_Uh oh._

"Why would you think that?"

"Why else would you feel the need to threaten Emmett?" She asked, shooting me a knowing glare.

"Oh yeah, I almost forgot about that. Busted."

"Yes, you are." She giggled.

"You can't be too mad at me. From what I hear, you have a hot date in your very near future."

She just leaned back on her elbows and sighed.

"Bella, I'm so, so hyped at the idea of it, but I'm kind of scared. I've never felt this way about somebody before. What if the date goes badly and…"

"But what if it goes really well?"

"Wait a minute, I didn't get to finish. What if the date goes badly, but what if it goes really great and I fall for him?"

I couldn't help the chuckle that escaped me.

"You say that like you aren't already halfway there."

"But that's what I mean. I could totally see myself falling for him…hard. What if he's the one, Bells? Am I ready for that?"

We sat there quietly for a minute.

"I don't know. You know I'm the last person that should be telling you how to handle your feelings and shit."

She couldn't really disagree with me, so she changed the subject instead.

"You say things took a turn after you talked to Emmett?"

"Yea, that's when I noticed it anyway."

"Well, what if it's all related? What if Edward got pissed because he saw you talking to another guy?"

I thought for two seconds before I had an answer. "That's crazy, Rose."

"Is it? Why couldn't he have been so overcome with jealousy that the only defense he had against his burning desire for you as well as his own inner demons relentlessly eating away at his insides was to act out towards you?"

Now we were both laughing.

"In an alternate universe, maybe."

"Maybe. But not impossible, right?"

I leaned over, elbows on my knees and my chin in my hand. Rose was so clouded over by love that everything was looking like a schmaltzy harlequin novel to her. As mushy as my insides were at the possibility, it wasn't very likely.

"Rose, he thinks I'm a two bit floozy throwing my poon all over the bar."

"He couldn't really think that, Bella."

"But he damn near said it to my face. Even if he hadn't alluded to it, he thinks I'm as smart as a box of rocks. That doesn't sound like the sentiment of a man stewing with desire for me."

All of that aside, I was pissed at myself for being so pissed about this, pissed about him. I had put him on a pedestal of sorts in the short time span that I'd known him and, despite how he made me all gooey and wanting, he had proven that he was just a man. He wasted no time showing me that he was a regular, plain old _stupid_ ass man. Just like the rest of 'em.

Even though it made absolutely no sense at all, it hurt, and my subconscious let me know just how tired I was of feeling that way by the way my brain had snapped and my tongue reacted. He was the recipient of all the rage I felt toward him, Embry and Riley in that moment. The sad part about it was that he had only seen the tip of that iceberg.

I was disappointed that _he_ was disappointed, but at the end of the day, I think I was the one that was disappointed. I didn't want to feel that way, ever again.

Rose looked down at her watch and frowned.

"I have to go back and get ready for my shift. Please tell me you're coming so you can get ready for yours."

I wasn't usually in the business of letting assholes push my buttons, but I couldn't help it this time. You could always count on me for a few choice words, but I'd never actually jeopardized my livelihood. Most definitely not without a good reason.

What really messed with my head was how his attitude towards me had done a full 360. There was no way that my behavior could have been the reason for it. How could I go back in that place and pretend like it didn't bother me?

"B – ell – a?" She sang into my ear.

"What?"

"Ella ella ella, aye!"

"What, Rose?"

I was trying to sound irritated, but she could be such a cornball when she was trying to cheer me up.

"Come back with me?"

"Rose, I don't think…"

"Look, you're set to work with me tonight. I don't usually volunteer to train newbies and I'm the best at all of this shit. Think about it, an opportunity like that doesn't come by every night. With me as your guide, I promise that you won't have time to think about this afternoon because I won't put up with anything less than your full attention. You will be a sponge tonight. Plus, Alice and Emmett will be there, too, and we've all got your back if need be. Please come back?"

I could see that I couldn't win this argument.

"So, you're saying that you're not just an awesome teacher, but also modest and demure?"

"You bet your ass I am."

"I guess you've got me, then. How could I say no to an opportunity to learn from _the_ best?"

"The _absolute_ best."

xx_C_xx

We approached the doorway to Clarity, Rose with a bit of pep in her step as she raced against the clock. I followed a few steps behind, sluggish after the adrenalin of our pep talk had worn off. I wasn't exactly sure if I was supposed to be here or not. Rose slowed up and we crossed the threshold together, only to find a steaming Alice waiting on the other side of the door.

"Where the fuck have you been?"

Rose looked between us and gave me a wave as she slid past Alice.

"I was up the street a bit, talking to Rose."

"Why aren't you getting ready to start your shift? You're going to shadow Rose tonight."

Enough time had passed since my outburst where Alice should have been made aware of what had happened between me and her brother. The way she talked, it seemed like I should have already been dressed and out on the floor, awaiting direction. I was confused.

"Alice, some things happened during my policy review that probably need to be addressed."

"Bella, we don't have time for any of that. You need to go on ahead and go to the dressing room. Your uniform is pressed and ready to go."

"But Alice, really. I need to clear this up. If not for myself, then for you and Rose. I don't want my actions to reflect badly on either of you."

"Bella, I know that you're new and this is your first day, but Clarity runs like a well oiled machine for a good reason. Whatever you have on your mind can wait. Please go get dressed."

I looked long and hard at Alice. While her stature had remained the same, stoic and fuming, her eyes and her voice betrayed her. She had to know what happened. Even if she didn't know all the details, she had to be made aware of one looming fact that couldn't be changed.

"But Alice, I quit. Shouldn't I go talk to him or something before I just assume I can waltz back into my job?"

Now she was either playing dumb or she really wanted me to get ready. She sighed heavily and approached me, placing her hands squarely on my shoulders.

"Fuck that and fuck him. We've already wasted enough time with his simple ass. Let's go, we've got to get you all pretty for your first day on the job."

**EPOV**

That's the great thing about being the boss. One of them anyway…

Nobody gives you shit about you sitting on your ass instead of working. Maybe the other boss, but that's it.

Sitting here at the bar and drinking myself stupid may not have been my brightest idea, but it sure helped numb the pain. Random girls came by and tried to get my attention, that was a given. I wasn't being conceited, that's just the fact of the matter. We garnered our fair amount of female attention when we went anywhere and just because this was my place of business didn't make it any different.

I only had eyes for the small brunette shadowing the Amazonian blonde tonight, though.

I reflected on the fire that lit her features this afternoon. She was all piss and vinegar, sweet and sour, as she laid into me.

_Sheer, unadulterated hotness_.

The shy, delicate flower that she had portrayed was a ruse that drew me in. Sweet and aromatic, fragile and perfect. There was so much more to her than that and I was clueless to all of it. I now longed to find a way to be found worthy of a place in that hallowed middle ground. I wanted to be where the people that she cared about and knew her best dwelled, somewhere between the dainty candle flicker and the molten lava that flowed powerfully beneath.

I was disappointed in myself for how I'd handled everything, but found that I was more disappointed that I had disappointed _her_. She was so pissed off, she quit without any question. All or nothing. Respect or be disrespected with extreme prejudice.

_I couldn't have agreed with her more._

"Something on your mind there, Hoss?"

I looked up from my glass to see Jasper grinning at me while he wiped down the countertop.

"Fuck you, Jazz." He chuckled; raising his hands up in surrender and went on about his business.

I looked over and noticed Bella, smoothly speaking with a customer as Rosalie watched on with pride. I knew she would be a quick study. _Engaging, attentive, knowledgeable, and gorgeous_. Over at the hostess station, Alice was still giving me the stink eye. Emmett stood close by her, doing the same.

I had fucked up, on several levels, and I would do my best to handle that. I wasn't sure how they had convinced her to come back, but I thanked whatever gods may be that she had. If I hadn't been sure of anything that came out of this mess, there was one thing that rang strong and true.

One day, I would make Bella mine.

"I remember when you used to look at me like that, Eddie."

I whirled around in my seat, trying my best to focus through the dizziness. Only one person ever called me Eddie.

"Tanya, what are you doing here?"

"Hello to you, too." She moved to sit in the seat next to me. "Jasper." She nodded in greeting. He returned it and went on about serving customers.

"So, is that the new little play thing holding your interest nowadays?" She moved her head in the direction of Bella and Rosalie.

I looked Tanya over, such a stark contrast to where my attentions had found their new home. Bella was petite in height, small, but deliciously curvaceous, shapely and inviting. A natural beauty, lips that looked soft and plump. Smooth, porcelain skin that I constantly wanted to touch.

Tanya was the picture of what she thought she was supposed to be. She was beautiful, don't get me wrong, tall and blonde, sea green, sparkling eyes, thin with fantastic bone structure, at least that's what her mother had always told me. Make up was flawless, clothes were designer. She could have any man in the world. But she wasn't my Bella.

With things where they were currently, there was no way that I was serving her up on a platter like that.

"Tanya, I don't know what you're talking about."

She snorted with no grace behind it at all.

"Oh ok, so you're not taking my calls just for the hell of it?"

"No, not just for the hell of it. I thought it was fairly clear that we didn't have anything else to say to each other."

She ignored me and placed her hand over mine on the bar, lightly stroking it.

"There is a lot that we have to say to each other. I thought some time and space would give us clearer heads to hash out this mess between us."

I was the one that had been drinking, but she had to be batshit crazy if she thought we had something left to hash out.

I removed my hands and placed them in my lap for safe keeping.

"I don't know what you mean, Tanya. There's nothing to hash out. There's really no more mess, either."

"What do you mean, Eddie?"

"What do I mean? We took care of all of that, remember? You smashed some stuff, didn't like what I had to say at the time? Does that ring any bells for you?"

She looked as if she was actually taken aback, like she didn't recall anything of our final night together. Instead of letting her down easy like I had planned, our simple conversation had turned into a Friday Night Fights on HBO.

"The things that I remember are the hurtful things that you said to me and the things that I said to you in anger. I may not ever understand what happened or what changed, but I don't think it would be prudent to just end what we were building."

Now I was the one taken aback.

"What exactly were we building, Tanya?"

Her eyes brightened at what could only be described as an opportunity for her.

"Look around you, Eddie! We were building our empire, this empire, piece by piece. Together, we can rule the world. I've been talking to Mother and she helped me see that you were right to want to start living our life and raising a family. I'm ready to do all of those things, too."

I sat up straighter, amazed at the complete level of crazy that sat next to me.

_Truly delusional._

"You didn't listen to a word that I said that night did you?"

"Of course I did."

"Then why are you here?"

I could feel my vocal chords soften as I noticed the shock and hurt whirling behind her eyes at my abruptness.

"I just can't figure you out. I spent a fair amount of time trying, that's for sure. But why did our love have to change? Why can't we try to recapture that?" she said.

This chick damn sure knew how to harsh a nice buzz. But it was of no matter. This needed to be done and my points had to be made since I wasn't as concise as I thought I had been with her.

"Listen, I meant what I said that night. I want all of those things, sure, but I thought I had made it crystal clear that you aren't the person I want any of those things with. Not any of it."

The words '_I haven't found her yet' _were on the tip of my tongue, but they wouldn't fall out. They just weren't true anymore.

She narrowed her eyes at me, all serpent-like and looking for the jugular.

"So, you're fucking her then? If it's not me you want, then it has to be her." She let her eyes wander toward Bella again. "A waitress, Eddie?"

My jaw was locked tight. Somehow, Tanya knew all of the right buttons to push. She had won most of our arguments from the sheer exhaustion I would get. She was a spoiled princess, through and through. I could be a brat some times, but she gave the term new meaning. I wouldn't give her the satisfaction this time, not at Bella's expense.

"I'm not fucking _you_. That's all you should really be concerned about."

I turned in my seat to face her, feeling much more stable than I had the first time.

"You would kiss me, but it wasn't real and you know it. You act like everything between us was alright but you know that that's not true."

She pouted immediately.

"I gave you the best that I had and you just want to turn around and sacrifice all of that?"

"Tanya, please…"I said, taking another long gulp of my drink.

She was brimming with the frustration of not having her way.

"No, I can see that she has something to do with this. There's no other reason why you would be pushing me away like this. She's attractive, I'll give you that, but I was here first. You owe me more than this, Eddie!"

She was on the verge of yelling, her whining drawing the attention of most of our customers and all of our employees, including Rosalie and Bella. This situation needed to be diffused _immediately_.

"First, Tanya, keep your voice down. Bella is an employee, a new one at that. Second, I don't owe you anything, least of all an explanation for what I may or may not want in my life now. We had magic in the beginning, I can admit to that, but that new excitement faded fast. I wanted more than what you could give to me. Irreconcilable differences if you need a phrase that you and your damn mother can relate to. Not once did you ever say you came in here because you loved me and you wanted to work it out, not that I would expect you to, but it proves my point. How deep could your love have really been for me then, hmm?"

Her fingers twisted nervously around the napkin in front of her. Maybe she thought I hadn't noticed any parts of the charade that was our time together, but her silence meant I had her right where I wanted her.

"You want the appearance of us, Tanya. Nothing more."

She grabbed my glass and tossed the half empty contents all over my face and shirt.

Jasper walked by quickly, headed towards a customer, tossing a hand towel in my direction. I took it, wiping away the last evidence of my association with Tanya Denali.

"You want to be a pretty woman loving a rich man. That's who you are and I'm alright with that because I found out before I could make a huge mistake. I'm not sure how you saw me looking at Bella, but I can guarantee you that I never once looked at you like that. There is no more you and me and there won't ever be."

She stood from the stool, speechless, grabbing her hand bag from the bar and marching her red bottom stilettos out the front door.

I sighed, finally feeling free of her.

"Fucking buzz kill, dude." Emmett said, clapping me on the shoulder and speaking to me for the first time since the debacle of this afternoon.

xx_C_xx

**BPOV**

She looked so…desperate and despondent when she walked in. Beautiful, no doubt, but it was like she had something to prove. The surface held all the right weaponry, a gorgeous face, shoulder length strawberry blonde hair, the shape of a Bond girl.

I went over tonight's specials as Rose watched over me. I had gained a decent repartee with two of our tables, so Rose thought I could handle being the primary server for them. That was before my attention was pulled away from them by the blonde bombshell that had just walked in.

She had nothing on Rose, but you get my meaning.

I tried to get my head back in the game, but the closer I saw her getting to Edward, zeroing in on his position and trying to find the courage to approach him, the more I noticed that I didn't like it.

Table two had decided on their entrees after we had delivered their Calamari and Bruschetta, so we went back to the kitchen to put the order in.

"Who's that woman talking to Edward?" I asked.

Rose gave me a side long look as she put her notepad into her apron pocket, but I was beyond caring about her judging me at that point.

"That's Edward's ex-girlfriend, Tanya."

"Oh," was all that I could muster.

_Who would've thought he would go for the obviously rich and beautiful?_

"She's beautiful, isn't she?" I asked; ignoring the burning sensation of the knife I had shoved into my very own sternum.

"Oh yes, very beautiful. She's absolutely gorgeous, supermodel material. But she's also certifiably insane." Rose jeered.

"Really?"

"Yeah, really. He'd have to be even dumber than Emmett thinks he is to take her back."

I was immediately intrigued.

She gave me as much of the low down as she could before it was time to get back out on the floor. Our customers were thoroughly enjoying themselves when we went to deliver the expertly plated entrees. So much so, they asked for refills on their drinks. Rose waved me over to the bar as she wandered off, towards Emmett, I'm sure.

I didn't want to invade their privacy, but Edward and _Tanya_ were seated very close to our pre-appointed area at the bar for picking up drinks specifically for dinner traffic. Seats were filling up fast, so I waited a minute for Jasper to see me waving at him.

"I just can't figure you out. I spent a fair amount of time trying, that's for sure. But why did our love have to change? Why can't we try to recapture that?" she said, running a single finger along his jaw line.

_Whoa. This was a conversation that I definitely didn't need to overhear._

Jasper caught me out of his peripheral and headed in my direction.

"What can I do you for, little lady?" he asked, all charm and charisma.

"Hey Jasper, could I get another Long Island Iced Tea and a Sex on the Beach?"

He feigned a look of shock that had caught me off guard with the amount of tension that had taken residence around us. "Why, certainly you could, but isn't that mighty forward of you? This is only your first day after all."

I caught on quickly, picking up on the fact that he was trying to shield me from the carnage that was happening only a few feet away from us. We laughed together for a moment.

He winked at me and went to shaking up my drinks. "Coming right up, Sweet Cheeks."

I leaned over the bar, hanging my head as I tried mightily to not pick up any tidbits of the conversation going on next to me.

"I'm not fucking _you_. That's all you should really be concerned about."

_Oh, what fresh hell is this?_

Just in the nick of time, Jasper walked up with my drink order.

"Here you go, darlin'. Take these to the customer and give them my deepest regards." He said.

There was something behind his bright, blue eyes that told me to get the hell out of dodge.

"Thanks," I said, grabbing my tray and making my way quickly out of the drop zone.

As I sat the fresh drinks onto the table, shooting a nod over in Rose's direction that I had this and she didn't have to stop what she was doing, a loud shriek at the bar caught both of our attention, as well as the attention of my customers.

"…you owe me more than this, Eddie!"

Before anyone had a chance to express their shock over the loud indiscretion that we had just witnessed, I took my leave of the table as Tanya reacted to whatever the hell Edward had decided to say to her, throwing his drink all over him.

_Indiscretion indeed._

I scanned the place trying to settle my attentions anywhere but at the bar. Alice leaned against the entryway, smirking and satisfied, eyes focused on the melee. Rose and Emmett had ducked out to hide their hysterics. Jasper had made his way to the kitchen doors with a handful of towels slung over his shoulder, whistling Dixie.

I waved Alice over and ducked inside the kitchen door.

"Alice, what is going on?"

"Oh, that? Don't pay her any attention, I knew she would be here tonight," she said, peeking through the swinging door.

"Alice!" I yelped. I was all out of ideas.

"Shuh…breathe, Bella," Alice soothed. "This is just a part of the process, it had to happen."

I stood stock still while looking at her. Either she had fallen completely off of her rocker or I simply wasn't getting her meaning.

"Come on now, silly. I know you've heard me talking about exorcising the demons that are left upon you when you end a relationship. It's an important step. That shit gets into your clothes and it stinks. Speaking of, you and I will need to have a little chat later." she said, as if that explained everything.

"Ok, so, what do we do now?" I asked, afraid of what Miss Cleo would have up her sleeve next.

"Now? We wait," she said.

xx_C_xx

We waited and emerged from the kitchen once the coast was clear. Edward was still perched upon his bar stool, but the customers we had had either cleared out or moved on to the entertainment portion of their evening. The adjoining room was now bustling with activity, despite the minor disruption not too long.

Rose came in and grabbed me, letting me know that it was time to take stock and check the Kitty. Clueless, I let her lead me to the bar, wary of our final destination, but relieved that we were on the opposite end of the boys who were huddled around Edward.

The Kitty was where all of the bar maids gathered and put all of their tip earnings into a pot, splitting it based on the percentage of who had brought in the most dough. There were peasants, royals, a princess and the much sought after Queen of the Kitty.

Rose pushed and elbowed her way through the gathered group while I took the opportunity to say hello to those that I hadn't met yet. Not wanting to miss out on anything, I made my way to Rose's side. She was rolling her neck and loosening her arms, preparing.

"This is my wheel house. You just sit back and observe." Rose said, her cerulean blue pupils fully dilated.

Each waitress that had participated in the dinner service had taken residence upon this space, emptying out there pockets and placing any spare change that they had in their possession in full view. As a new member of the staff, I was present, but not truly accounted for. Emptying my pockets only took a few seconds and the ritual began.

By the twenty minute mark and after a respectable amount of bartering, Rose had been crowned tonight's 'Queen of the Kitty' and Jessica had been given her tiara as the 'Princess.'

"Suck it, you Twat Monkeys!" Rose declared as her first order of business, sticking her tongue out at Jessica and fist pumping the air. I could see now that I would need to monitor some of the time that she spent with Emmett.

She counted out some bills and handed me a wad.

"What's this for?" I asked, not expecting to really be able to participate until I had finished my training.

"Bella, you were excellent tonight. You were charming and attentive and the customers all left here happy and satisfied. I have no doubt that I'll be sticking my tongue out at you before too long." She said.

My heart warmed at the back handed compliment she was giving me, but I wouldn't be swayed from our signed and sealed agreement.

"Thank you, Rose. I relish the opportunity to learn just enough from the best so that I can properly fist pump when I swoop in and take your title."

She arched a perfectly shaped brow at me as she tucked her much larger wad down deep into her cleavage...which was also much larger.

"Ha, that's so cute! I love it when a youngster has goals!" We both laughed, but I was genuinely grateful that I had her here to take me under her wing, not to mention talking me off of the ledge earlier. I wouldn't be able to tell her that until I had dusted her ass at least once, though.

We were pulled away from our laughter by the sound of Alice's tinkling soprano voice over the microphone in the next room.

_This place really does have a kick ass sound system._

She had climbed up to the DJ booth where Mike was setting the tone for a night of drinks and dancing for the new patrons that were filing in, as well as the ones that had stayed around after finishing their meals.

"Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to Clarity! Tonight, we have DJ Magic Mike on the wheels of steel."

Snickers, giggles and groans could be heard amongst all of the employees.

"I told her to say that shit!" Emmett yelled from his side of the bar, pointing at his self with both thumbs.

"Please don't be shy! Just let us know if you have any special requests that you'd like to hear. As always, our bar maids are here to please with the best drinks and appetizers in town. Let's kick things off with a song that I want to dedicate to the newest member of the Clarity family. Bella, this one is for you, girl! Enjoy!"

The upbeat, thumping rhythm of Keyshia Cole's Let it Go came through the speakers:

_I understand why you wanna try.  
>Make him stay home late at night.<br>But if he wanna go,  
>he'll be gone, no lie.<br>I can't explain how many times I tried.  
>How many times I cried.<br>Thinkin' about mine and where he might be.  
>Remember when I gave everything I got,<br>couldn't get deep down inside.  
>How could I love someone who didn't love me?<br>But now I get _

_that if he don't wanna  
>love you right way, <em>

_he ain't gonna.  
>It ain't where he's at; it's where he wanna be…<em>

_Baby I won't let you play games._

_If you wanna leave, then you can go._

_If he ain't gonna love you the way he should, then let it go.  
>If he ain't gonna treat you the way he should, then let it go…<em>

A part of me was appalled at the spotlight that was shone on me, but not even that could keep the smile off of my face. We had spent many a night singing into our hairbrushes to this song over one bum or another. It could have been nostalgia, or it could have been those stains she had talked about earlier that continued to linger on my clothes. Either way, her message was received, loud and clear.

_Crazy Alice._

Sufficiently and utterly exhausted from the roller coaster ride that this day had turned out to be, I gave Rose a hug and let her know that I was heading home. I set out to find Alice, hug her, and maybe ask her for a lift since Rose was going to hang out for a little while.

Before I could get too far, though, something in my peripheral had caught my eye. I warred with myself, weighing the arguments of both the teeny tiny little angel on my right shoulder and the larger, more opinionated devil on my left. As much as I'd love nothing more than a shower and my bed, the day was not done. The angel had won. There was something else that needed to be handled if my conscience was ever going to find rest tonight.

I made my approach. Quietly. Cautiously.

"Mr. Cullen…I mean, Edward. Can we talk for a minute?"

xx_C_xx

As always, thanks for reading! Let me know what you think, I love hearing from you guys!

**The playlist as it stands so far…**

**Cupid's Got a Gun- Shanell ft. Nicki Minaj**

**Something – Drake**

**Moment of Clarity – Jay Z**

**C.R.U.S.H – Ciara**

**You Got Me Wide Open – Bootsy Collins**

**Let it Go – Keyshia Cole**


	7. You Should Be Here

**As per usual…**

Quotes, songs and lyrics belong to their respective writers and/or artists.

Sadly enough, I don't own anything related to Twilight. I do own my original characters and my original story. No copyright infringement is intended.

I do not have a beta, so my apologies in advance.

Hate it or love it…let me know.

**Sorry for the delay. If it makes you feel any better, the next chapter will be up in the next day or so…..**

**Chapter 7 – You Should Be Here**

_Get it - get it better or get it worse. No middle ground of compromise.__  
><em>**_- _**_Henry Ossawa Tanner_

**BPOV**

_I made my approach. Quietly. Cautiously. _

"_Mr. Cullen…I mean, Edward. Can we talk for a minute?"_

I'd like to think that I approached him with the cool, calm, stealthy demeanor of a jungle cat. A mistress of the Serengeti setting her sights on her prey. A denizen of the night making the object of her forbidden desires flinch and squirm with anticipation as she zeroed in on him…

_Yeah, right…_

I'd like to think that, but my nerves were fried as I walked over, slowly, but still like regular old Bella. My dogs were barking and my shoulders felt like they had gone through a good, deep tissue beat down, but I wouldn't show any weakness if I could help it. He wouldn't even be Mr. Cullen until we talked because, as far as I was concerned, Jasper was my boss now and he was just _Asshole_ Edward.

I strode as best I could, holding my sore shoulders and my head high. I even attempted to sashay, adding a slow wind to my step, but that just felt silly on me. I told myself that he was still a bastard the closer that I got, but I wanted this job and I planned on being here for the long haul, with or without his blessing. I would try and let him know that in the most civil way that I could.

_Plus, he had had a hell of a night already without this foolishness._

_Shit._

Even with my thoughts of strength and certainty running through my head, I was turning soft. _Why should I care that he'd had his ass handed to him by his ex?_ I told myself that I didn't, even though I really wanted to run my fingers through that messy, copper crop that he called hair. I wanted to tell him that he didn't need that bitch. A denizen of the night would tell him that _she_ could be what he needed.

_What? _

_Stop. _

_Focus._

There he sat; slumped over and holding court over a sad, almost empty glass of brown ice. The 'sausage fest' that had been surrounding him had dissipated, leaving him all alone at the bar. Most of the customers were dancing and partying in the other room, enjoying their nightlife. He was lost in his own little world and I immediately started having second thoughts.

The Angel and the Devil decided to take their places at the podium:

_You should go ahead and talk to him. But be nice! Let him know that you're not mad and that you'd like to be friends…_

**Phbbt…damn all that. Tell him that you're gonna be around this place whether he likes it or not. Tell him that he can hate that shit or he can love it. You could care less either way…**

The Angel just shook her head…

_Come on now, Bella. Can you imagine what it will be like to come in here, night after night, with all of the tension and animosity that would remain if you held onto this grudge? Sure, you could do it, but that doesn't mean it's to be done. Maybe he has the wrong opinion of who you are now, but you could always change his mind. Remember what Grandma Swan used to say. You'll catch more flies with honey…_

**That may be true, but remember what Charlie **_**always**_** says. A hard head makes a soft ass and a good junk punch is a thing of beauty! You don't have to pander to him. You just have to do a good job and make your money. Fuck him! If he's so sure that he doesn't like you, tell him to sit and spin…**

The Angel took a moment, flipping through her notes.

Finally tossing them over her shoulder, she turned toward her counterpart, the Devil.

_I actually agree with you this time. A hard head makes a soft ass, indeed. You're stubborn as all get out, but just this once, think of the bigger picture. Think of Alice and Rose and how they helped in getting you in here. It will be worth it to be the bigger person._

It was hard to argue with the Angel. She was dead on. As much as I could appreciate the spritely little Devil, wishing I had considered a good, solid junk punch earlier in this day, the point and the win went to the Angel this time.

"Edward, are you alright?"

He jerked his head up in surprise, eyes mossy green and streaked with red, blood shot and droopy. He looked around, breathing heavily, but slowly calming. I watched on, nervous, but determined. He then settled on my face.

"Bella, you scared me. For a minute I thought you were Alice."

The true fear of his expression made me giggle.

"Nope, it's just me, can I sit?"

He was hesitant.

"Umm, sure. …if you want to," he said.

I took a seat, trying to be as lady like as I could in my short skirt. I shimmied further, burrowing into it. The bar stools here were armless and _so_ comfortable with nice, soft cushions and high, slated wooden backs. Deep, dark mahogany with different color cushions on each one. The coolest part was that they swiveled.

As I smoothed my skirt again, I noticed him taking me in, lingering on my legs that were haphazardly wrapped around the stool to keep my _business_ intact.

_Interesting._

I waited for him to meet my eyes before I dove in.

"Edward, listen, I know you had a tough night, but I think there are a few things that I should say before any more time passes between us."

I searched his face to make sure he was with me. Behind his eyes I could see the stirring of something that he wanted to say, but he just nodded, stoic and silent, telling me to continue. _Allowing_ me to continue. My eyes narrowed.

_Alright then, fucker. Here goes…_

"Ok. Look, I shouldn't have reacted to what you said to me the way that I did, especially not on my first day here. I definitely shouldn't have let it drive me to the point of quitting. I'm so - sor - sorry."

I choked a bit on that last part.

His eyebrows rose, showing his surprise, but I wasn't anywhere near done with him.

"I'm mature enough to admit that I'm sorry for that, but you have to understand me when I say that I don't think you deserve it."

His head tilted, waiting for me to elaborate.

"You deserve respect for being one of the owners of this place, but your employees deserve the same. You turned into an entirely different person when it was just you and me. You may be like that with everybody that works for you, but I was completely thrown for a loop and acted off of instinct. Trust me when I say that I've had people not like me before. That's fine because now that I know, I can deal with it, but there's usually a good reason behind it."

I paused, waiting for any sort of sign from him that I was wrong or that I shouldn't have felt the way that I did or at least a hint at his reasoning.

Nothing.

I soldiered on.

"Now that I have a better idea of where I stand with you, I want to at least make an effort to establish some peace because…I want and need this job and I can't say that your surly disposition towards me is going to be enough to make me give it up."

_There. It was out on the table and the ball was in his court now._

He rubbed at his temple, missing it a few times before he seemed ready to respond.

"Bella, the last thing I expected was for you to walk back in here, at all. Especially not before dinner service." He turned a little on his stool, facing me, "I can never express to you how glad I am that you did. I'm the one that owes an apology, not you."

He looked over at me, all long lashes and Bambi eyes.

"I am so, so very sorry for how I talked to you and for what I said. I had no right and I completely understand why you quit. I only hope that you can forgive me."

_Wow._

I didn't expect for this to go so easily. I imagined him flying off the handle and making me fight him for those words of apology. I was knocked off of my game and I didn't usually let that happen, _certainly not twice in the same day. _

"So, that's it?" I asked.

His eyebrows shot up again. His remorseful words were nice, but he had another thing coming if he thought he was just going to get off scot free like that.

"Not to seem ungrateful or anything, but more of an explanation is in order, don't you think?" I prodded.

"Well, umm…" he stuttered.

I waited.

He tossed back the liquid that remained in his cup; raking his fingers through his hair like there was no tomorrow, avoiding my eyes completely.

I waited some more.

"Bella, I wish I had an answer for you, but I really don't. I could say that my day just suddenly took a turn for the worse, but that would be sort of lame."

I was amazed. And slightly fucking infuriated.

"So, you're saying you flipped the switch from being a nice guy to a jerk off _just_ because you fucking felt like it? Because something in _your_ day didn't go like _you_ wanted it to, that gave you an all expense paid pass to make _me_ feel like shit?"

I could feel the Devil pushing the Angel just the slightest bit to my left. All of my previous resolve to take the high road dissipated into the air around us. I was getting mad all over again.

"No, no, I'm not saying that…"

"Then exactly what in the hell are you saying? I'd love to know what _exactly_ it was that I _did_ to make you start acting all pissy. Did I do something to make you suddenly decide that I wasn't good enough to be nice to? Did I say something to make you think that I needed to be told to keep my _poon_ to myself?"

"No, Bella, wait. I'm just saying that there is no good reason in the world for me to give you. I tend to be moody sometimes. A character flaw, if you will."

"A character flaw, huh?"

He nodded, vigorously.

_He was right. Lame._

"One of many," he added quickly.

_Still lame._

My eyes narrowed further. I didn't buy it for a minute. His lips were moving, but he was saying a whole lot of nothing. Suddenly, I was exhausted. I could fight him on this, I could even try and pull an answer out of his ass, but what would be the point? I wasn't going to rock the boat further if there was even the slightest chance that things could be civil between us.

I looked over at him. His eyes were pleading, begging for me to accept his oh so delicate reasoning. Soft and as thin as tissue paper.

He licked his lips, searching for more words to try and placate me, coming up empty. Somehow, I didn't notice. I was being drawn to his tongue, flicking about his mouth, creating the moisture that he seemed to need so badly all of a sudden.

"Uh huh." I said randomly, twirling a lock of my hair around a finger.

He really was a ridiculously drool worthy specimen. Even in his disheveled state, his sexiness truly knew no bounds. His wild hair, the stubble forming along his jaw, the red flush upon his lips, that tongue…

"Bella?"

"Huh?"

"I asked if we could maybe call a truce. I have no reason to not _like_ you. I'd like the chance to show you that I'm not always such a dick."

_Oh no, please don't make me think about you and your dick!_

I shook my head, feeling the daze that being this close to him apparently put me in. Noting how his face had fallen, I realized that he had taken that as my answer. He thought I was saying no to his offer for peace. I pulled myself together quickly, wanting to find a resolution to this mess despite the distraction of my inappropriately lusty thoughts. _Inappropriate, but justifiable._

"On one condition."

"Name it. Anything."

"Tell me what I did."

"Bella…"

"I think I have a right to know. You were a total ass face to me."

"Bella, you didn't do or say or imply anything. I promise you that. I also promise that I _can_ be a good guy, a decent boss. Look, you took the first step by coming back when you had every right to leave and never return. I get that. Let me meet you the rest of the way."

I mulled over his words, his desire to make good.

"You know, you're amazingly lucid for a drunken motherfucker that had a beautiful, mysterious lady pour a drink on him not too long ago."

His smile was warm and inviting. Brilliant and beautiful.

"Yes, I am completely capable of knowing a drunken motherfucker when I see one, fuck you very much," I said, brushing off my shoulder and popping my collar a little.

He laughed right along with me. "Yes, you can indeed."

He took on a faraway expression. It was fleeting, but it was there before he quickly composed himself. He was still relaxed, but he seemed to catch himself from opening up too much, a feeling that I was all too familiar with.

"Believe it or not, that was one of the brighter spots of my day," he chuckled.

"You can't be serious," I said.

"Oh yes, deadly serious."

"Why is that?"

"Well, let's see. What happened after she threw her drink on me?" He asked, tapping his chin.

I thought for a moment.

"She left."

"Exactly! Brightest spot of my last 12 hours."

We both doubled over, he was holding onto his sides and I was wiping tears from my eyes. It felt good not to be on guard around him for once. Comfortable. It was actually…nice.

Turning serious again, I figured now was as good a time as any to let him in on a decision I had made. I could only hope that his friendly disposition would stand.

"Oh yeah, you should probably know that I don't consider you _my_ boss anymore."

He continued laughing a little more, leaning back against the bar, letting my declaration soak in fully.

"Is that so?"

"Yes, it is. I quit you as my boss today and I think I'd like to keep it that way."

He started to open his mouth in question but, feeling bold and empowered, I put two of my fingers right on that sexy mouth of his.

"I think I like this version of you much better and I think I'd like to keep him around a little longer. For now on, Jasper is my boss." I was teasing, sure, but I started to like the sound of it. He didn't say anything in protest, so I figured it was a go.

"Well, it's been a long night, so I think I'm going to go find Alice and try to hitch a ride home."

"I could take you?" He offered and stood up at the same time I did.

"Umm, no, I don't think so. I'm probably going to send her back so she can give you a ride, too. You shouldn't drive with this much Jack Daniels coursing through your veins." I held up the empty bottle and shook it to prove my point.

"True," he said, nodding in agreement.

I started to walk away, but paused.

"I'm glad we got to sit down and talk. Thank you, Edward."

"My pleasure, Ms. Swan," he said softly.

"I think Bella might be ok when we're off the clock?"

He looked at me for one, excruciatingly long moment, and then grinned at me, big and bright like the sun.

"Noted."

I turned and started my search for Alice. Even though I walked away with _many_ more questions than answers, I was proud of myself. I had put my big girl panties on and I'd taken the bull by the horns in order to turn this situation with Edward around.

_We're gonna make it after all…._

**EPOV**

_Another suitable end to another abysmal night. This was my fuck awesome existence. _

The peanut gallery surrounded me as soon as the coast was clear.

"Ok, so, you have to tell me. You had not one, but _two_ hot chicks tell you the fuck off in the same day. Now, don't tell me you're going to Disneyland, but really, how the fuck are you feeling right now?"

_Emmett is so fucking funny._

"Don't even worry about it, Bro. Her booty is mad thin anyway. You should go for Bella."

I ignored him and everybody else that had crossed my path, only allowing Mr. Jack Daniels to have any say in my feelings. One by one, the crowd started to disperse. Even Jasper had stopped pretending to wipe down the already clean counter in front of me. He was holding vigil, but that was because he was my friend and wanted to be there for me. I didn't need or deserve that right now, I just needed to come up with how I was going to get out of this hole as far as Bella was concerned. Tanya could go fly a kite.

I felt someone approach. I had even heard the quiet question that was asking if I was ok. That didn't stop the adrenaline from coursing through me, expecting Alice to fully make good on her promise to make me pay if I couldn't find a way to fix everything.

Coming closer, I seriously thought it was Alice, finally coming to cut me. But no, it was Bella. Wanting to talk. To _me_.

She sidled up to the bar, wrapping her legs around the stool as best she could in her skirt, like we were little kids sitting in her tree house. You could tell that she had been a tom boy growing up, trying to remember to keep her legs _just so_ in that damn skirt.

Feigning nonchalance in the wake of her own discomfort, it just made her all the more endearing to me. Whether or not the source of her discomfort was me or the offending piece of clothing she had to wear, she was trying. That was more than I would ever be worthy of. Much more than I deserved.

Pulling on extra material that simply wasn't there, she was smoothing it out within an inch of its life. She tried crossing her legs at the knee. She then thought better of it, letting them hang free before crossing them at her ankles.

_That evil, ubiquitous skirt, encasing and confining those long, luxurious, shapely legs of hers. _

I simply couldn't help the way that I all out molested her with my stinging, tired eyes. She was a goddess and I was a mere pauper. I was a jester within her magnificent court. Thank God I met her eyes before I could draw anymore of her wrath.

She was phenomenal in her ire. I sounded like a douche, tripping over my words and pissing her off more. I couldn't shake the idea that seeing her all fiery and mad had put in my head. My ears were ringing, from the liquor, but also from the voice in my head that kept telling me that she should be here. She should be in my life. She should be _here_.

I mean, really, there had to be something to the spark that flew between us, right? There had to be something that she saw to have come back, something ever present, even now, when she could probably get some satisfaction from punching me in the face. Her job? Sure, that was one reason. I'll even compromise and say that it was a main reason. But this? This amount of passion had to mean that there was more to it.

I thought I would burst out laughing when she alluded to the fact that she thought I didn't like her. That was the _furthest_ thing from the truth. I liked her way too much, my desire reaching epic proportions, but I could never let her know that. Not now anyway. As she simmered down from spitting fire, I had to fight the urge to verbalize that she should be here, without question. When she asked me for more, I thought I was going to piss my pants.

_You want more? I'll give you more. A helluvalot more. _

I knew she wanted more of an explanation, but I couldn't just put myself out there like that. She already had absolute power over me. I mean, I had to maintain some sort of dignity. Hell, I was a catch, right? _Fuck yeah I was._ When the circumstances were right, I could show her what she was missing. I'm a good man and I work hard. _I've got more than just some good dick and some money…_

Hope flooded me when things cooled and we just started to talk to each other. We even laughed. Maybe we would be friends after all. The thought made me want to hurl. Deep down, I knew that maybe, just maybe, it would be for the best. Maybe this would put us in a place where I could make up for my errors today and get her to truly _like_ me. Maybe this would get my foot in the door to let her see that, once I got her, she would _never_ want to walk away. Not again.

This sure as fuck wasn't a part of the plan when I'd hired her, brought her in early to stalk her, romance her, but now we were back to square one. Actually, we were at negative twenty five squares. I'd agree to anything if it would change that fact.

She informed me that I was no longer her boss because she had "quit me." It took everything inside of me not to say "but you can't quit me, baby..."

It was hard, but I did it, even though it sounded smooth as _fuck_ in my own head.

I negotiated with her, asking that she at least keep up the pretense for the other waitresses lest they get wind and think that they had me wrapped around their fingers, too. Missing my intonation, she never picked up on the fact that she had me wrapped around hers, completely and undoubtedly.

After another round of debate, she agreed to call me Mr. Cullen when the situation called for it, but I would be Edward any other time. I wasn't sure how I felt about it at first, but the more I thought about it, the more I liked the sound of it. She had the upper hand in this situation, but she had had that the whole time anyway.

Asking her to let me take her home sounded desperate, even to my own, inebriated ears, but I didn't want her to leave. Being with her like this, simply talking, felt…nice. Comfortable. But she was visibly tired and I had taken enough out of her for one day.

_Not nearly enough, but you know what I mean._

I probably could have suggested that she look for Alice in the upstairs offices, but I was a man. Surely she would be there since Jasper was nowhere to be seen, I didn't need to be sober to come up with that. I was a man and watching Bella move would be my greatest reward for this horrible night.

_I hated to see her go, but I loved watching her walk away…_

xx_C_xx

**Playlist is on my profile. Check it out. I love it….**


	8. My Best Friend's Say

**As per usual…**

Quotes, songs and lyrics belong to their respective writers and/or artists.

Sadly enough, I don't own anything related to Twilight. I do own my original characters and my original story. No copyright infringement is intended.

I do not have a beta, so my apologies in advance.

Hate it or love it…let me know.

**Chapter 8 – My Best Friends' Say…**

"_I'm mistaken for a flirt when I'm friendly. I'm mistaken for a bitch when I'm blunt. I'm mistaken for sad when I'm alone. I'm mistaken for shy when I'm quiet. Quit assuming and get to know me." – Anonymous_

xx_C_xx

"_Whatever. I'm the girl Barbie wants to be…" – Anonymous_

**BPOV**

My job at Clarity was shaping up to be the greatest thing since sliced bread.

True, it may have been like the awkward little heel of the loaf. It may have even had a spot or two of mold on it. It certainly wasn't perfect, but it was still good. I would tell myself that over and over.

_It's all good._

It had been a few weeks since I'd had that talk with Edward. That was at the end of my very first night. Thinking on it now, it seemed like a life time ago. It was still weird when I was around him, but I chalked that up to the shaky start that we'd had that day. It would get better. It may even get easier. That's what I had been trying to explain to myself, anyway.

Without a doubt, Edward had been my biggest hurdle so far; the mere thought of him tripping me up anytime I tried to get out of the starting blocks. I was like a runner that was great at the sport, but this single event gave me the heebie geebies. It was like I was a master if I was competing in a speed race like the 100 or even an endurance race like the 800, but I feared the hurdles. Being this close to him daily was turning out to be a gift and a curse of sorts. Our agreement was that I wouldn't think of him as a boss, but that simply couldn't be helped. His commanding demeanor and attention to detail while on the clock absolutely called for it.

There was a tension in the air whenever we were working together, a sensually thick and decadent thing that covered us like a mousse, guiding my steps toward him as if he were chocolate. I thought it was my imagination or my lingering feelings of uncertainty about this whole situation, but it was clearly there, crackling and popping away in the background. It hummed between us constantly, not only on his manager shifts, but when he worked behind the bar, too. Maybe even more so. He wasn't the laid back comedian that Jasper was when he tended bar. He was just as much a supervisor as he was in his suit.

I had done well so far, putting extra effort into being on my best behavior each and every night. I was diligent in keeping my trap shut whenever he barked out an order. I walked on eggshells so I wouldn't get too comfortable around him just because we had come to a mutual understanding. I wanted to show him that I was about my business and that my work ethic was top notch and above reproach. I wanted him to know, beyond a shadow of a doubt, that I was there for a reason and that letting me go would have been the worst mistake that he could have made.

I allowed myself to thrive off of his power instead of allowing it to anger me when he chose to flex it. The most difficult part in all of that was how it made me wetter than a friggin' rainforest. Like a Navy Seal Veteran. _Damn._ Most nights, I wanted him to just toss me onto that fucking bar and pound me for all that I was worth! That train of thought was doing nothing for my self control. I was a powder keg, just waiting to be lit and ready to explode with all of the mixed emotions that I had swirling around inside of me.

_And I thought I had it bad when I simply considered him to be my smoking hot employer! _

I was so far beyond beating myself up for my inappropriate thoughts at this point. They were always on deck, ready and waiting to flood my brain, to overtake all of my senses. I wanted to know the little things. What was his favorite color? Why did he always run his hands through his hair and tug when he was nervous? I wanted to know what moved him. I wanted to know what actually made him smile, made him happy. I wanted him. Plain and simple.

I finally just had to say fuck it. _It is what it is…_

"Ms. Swan?"

"Huh?"

I was dreamily staring out of a window during my Global Markets seminar. There I was, diligently taking notes one minute, then chewing on my pen and staring out at a random patch of grass on a hill the next. This is what he had reduced me to. There wasn't even anything interesting about it. It was just grass. Just a plain old patch of boring ass, green grass. That lush green color was wrapped tightly around each blade. It consumed it. Encompassed it. Defined it. The sunlight bounced off of the moist droplets of morning dew, turning each tall, strong _green_ blade all bright and shimmery. _Uuugh._ I needed to get my shit together. What loser can't pay attention during her one class of the day? I need this damn grade, too.

_That boy was going to be the death of me._

"Uh, I'm sorry. What was the question?"

Professor Cope looked pissed as she leaned on her desk, allowing her dark squared frames to dangle on the tip of her nose.

"I asked what your thoughts were on the role that local culture has played in how many global brands have chosen to go about establishing their presence within their respective markets."

Thank God I hadn't fallen completely off of my rocker with this. I had still been keeping up with my studies.

"Well, I believe that many of today's industry giants have taken the opportunity to expand their markets on a global scale both seriously and responsibly by taking the time to understand the local cultures in which they owe their success, or continued success depending on your perspective. While the global market is about products, the local markets, wherever they may be, are about the people."

I took a moment to gather my next thought, noticing how the entire seminar was giving me their undivided attention; no doubt wanting to see me squirm.

"The need for both industry standards and efficiencies has been balanced with the need to forecast and execute effectively within varying local markets around the world. Some of the more basic business formulas for doing this have included developing marketing plans and advertising campaigns with regard to cultural sensitivities and religious dietary needs, for example."

_Take that, Bitches…_

My professor looked sufficiently impressed. "More students should come to class as prepared as you are. But, in the future, please try and pay more attention in my class, Ms. Swan."

I could only nod and sink down into my seat…and further into my thoughts.

I decided then and there that I would have to stay on my toes about one additional thing: keeping quiet about it all. Nobody needed to know. Still, seeing that man in action was like magic. He would my little secret. He was the forbidden, shiny red apple that would remain just out of my reach.

I always knew that strength and power was appealing to me, but his was on a whole other level. His sexy was on a hundred thousand…screw that, a trillion! Couple all of that with the fact that I never forget shit, especially if I felt like I'd been wronged in some way, and I was wound super tight when in his presence. Wanting him could end up being both the worst and stupidest thing that I could ever do. He was my boss for goodness sake!

All of that made thinking of him as just one of the guys on a social level a slow and steady race. It was a problem that had Excedrin written all over it and wrapped up in a neat little bow. When we weren't on the clock, he was so nice and friendly. He was sweet, maybe even a little shy. He smiled. We had even tied one on a few nights after shift. Shared a few laughs. I could see that he was really cool, at least when he tried to be.

Our new little social circle was also a conundrum. Whenever we did anything, it was me, Rosie, Alice, Emmett, Jasper… and Edward. There was always me on one end, one certified couple, a wanna be couple in denial, and then Edward bringing up the other end. I had to give him credit, though. He tried like hell to get me to talk and loosen up a bit. Sometimes, I just couldn't. I still had something to prove. _To him._ Both versions of him. Becoming aware of his vulnerability on that first night as well as his jagged, dominant edge had placed me in a full on tail spin. It was the sweetest kind of torture.

And each day I told myself it was getting better. That I was getting better.

Despite that smudge in the beginning, I can honestly say that, since we'd had that talk, things had been good. _Really good._ I was settling in nicely. Having my best girls with me most days and getting the chance to know Emmett and Jasper on a friendly level had been an absolute blast!

There were a few girls brought in a week or so after me, so I wasn't officially the newbie anymore. Bree and Leah were both super cool and I could see hanging out with them in the future. That Gianna bitch? I had the feeling that she was going to be a problem, right off the bat.

Speaking of problems, when Jasper had introduced me to Mike for the first time, he looked at me like I was something to eat. Seriously, I think he may have creamed himself when I shook his hand. I excused myself immediately to go to the ladies room to wash mine. I really wanted to be nice, but he had this creepiness about him, a 'hungry' vibe if that makes any sense. Anytime I was friendly, he would always take it as permission to go too fucking far. I can't count how many times I'd look up to find him leering at me from behind the DJ booth. I made sure I kept the pepper spray on me that Charlie had sent.

Aside from that, though, the money was _fucking_ awesome and I was still just considered a trainee! Jessica currently wore the princess crown, but I had bigger fish to fry. Rosie and her days as Queen Bee were surely numbered. All I had to do was learn the menu, be on time and be nice to my customers. There were kitchen staples and specials to consider, but all in all, I was doing ok in that regard. My school schedule was pretty lenient most of the week, so getting to work on time was only tricky if I was coming in for a cleaning shift on Mondays.

Being nice to my customers was easy…most of the time. This white blouse didn't hurt much, either. Alice was simply an evil genius. I had a nice, push up, water bra from Victoria's Secret that truly gave me a boost in my tips anytime I decided to wear it. So much so, Rose proclaimed that this Thursday would be our "girls' night out." We were all scheduled off, so I really had no reason to turn her down. Besides, we hadn't done anything without the guys in awhile. But I wasn't complaining. Life was good right now and spending a little of this hard earned money was definitely in order.

Any type of girls' night for Alice had to involve shopping.

"OMG, Bella! This set would be perfect for you!" Alice squealed as she handed me a hunter green nighty.

"Alice, who in the world would I even wear this for?"

"Does it matter? Now, scoot. I'll bring you a few more things to try on while you're in the dressing room."

I learned long ago that arguing with Alice when she was in her element like this was futile. I took the nighty and several other ensembles to the dressing room. Rose was already locked away in hers.

After a couple of hours and more stores, Little Miss Dress Up allowed us to get some food in our systems by way of the Water Tower Place Food Court.

"I'm so glad you got those pumps, Rosie. They make your legs look _fantastic_ in that dress from bebe." Alice said, munching on her Asian salad.

"Thanks, but fuck the dress. I'm more concerned with how they'll look with my La Perla set!" She laughed.

"I guess that means things are going good with Em, then?" I asked, going in on my grilled ham and cheese sandwich. I knew they were, but I loved to watch her reaction whenever I asked.

"A good girl never tells," she said as she popped the top on her delicious smelling turkey meatloaf, "but I haven't been a good girl in a very long time, so yes!" She squealed, sounding a lot like Alice usually does.

She leaned in to whisper and we automatically did the same.

"I'm thinking we'll be sliding into home base here soon, so I figure I should be prepared."

"Ooh, do tell!" Alice clapped her hands in approval. "I knew that big ole teddy bear had it in him! He's probably got a monster sized…"

"Hey, hey, watch it! That's _my_ man you're talking about." Rosie winked as she pointed at us with her fork. She was so happy, she was glowing.

"What about you, Alice? How are things going for you and your guy?" I asked as I took another bite.

Her fork clanged loudly as it hit the edge of her bowl.

"What guy?" She asked, all innocent and wide eyed.

Rosie and I shot each other a questioning look across the table before we both busted out laughing.

"Oh, please! You can't seriously think that you and Jasper are being low key. You two may as well be wearing signs on your foreheads!" I chuckled.

_She couldn't really believe that, could she?_

She dug down deep into her salad bowl. She probably would have crawled into it if she could.

"Alice, come on now." Rose said, crossing her arms in disbelief."What's the problem? We're only picking with you. You and Jasper are adorable!"

"I – I didn't think anybody knew. I thought we were being careful. Professional."

She looked absolutely mortified.

"Honey, what are you talking about? I think you two are the cutest thing ever, but a blind man could see that you are totally into each other. What's wrong?"

She was on the verge of tears.

I pulled her close, wrapping my arm around her. "Alice? Sweetheart, talk to us."

She sniffled as she fought away her tears. Rose looked at me like I was supposed to have an answer, but I was just as clueless as she was. We'd have to wait until tinker bell could talk.

"I - I'm just not sure what Edward will say. He's my brother and Jasper is his best friend. He'll never go for it and… I just don't want him to be mad."

"Oh honey, of course he's not going to be mad," Rose soothed as she held Alice's hand across the table.

I snickered.

Rose shot me a death glare.

She and I both knew that _Sgt. Slaughter_ would have a field day with this, especially if he found out in a way that he didn't like. If I had learned anything about Edward, it was that he could be the slightest bit touchy with certain subjects.

"Of course he's going to _act_ mad, but what big brother doesn't act protective of his baby sister? It's in his job description! I think you may be overreacting a little."

Alice hiccupped. "You think?"

"I know! If you're happy, then he'll be happy."

"Besides, we've both got your back. We'll just kick his ass if he tries to start any shit." I promised.

"I doubt Jasper would take any shit from him either, but I really don't think you need to worry. Edward's got his own problems now," Rose winked at Alice, nodding in my direction.

"What the hell does that mean?" I asked, holding Alice at arm's length.

Rose jumped in, "Nothing. Nothing at all."

And, just like that, the little nymph was smiling again. "Thanks guys."

Crisis averted, we went back to our dinners.

"How is everything going for you at work, Bella? Are you getting used to everything ok? Is everybody being nice to you?" Alice asked.

I knew what she was getting at. She wanted to know how things had evened out between me and Edward. With her being in charge of the hostesses, I didn't get to see her much during my shifts now that I was close to being 'fully orientated.'

"It's great, actually. A few minor difficulties here and there, but overall, smooth sailing over calm seas."

She scrunched her eyebrows as she chewed.

"What difficulties?"

I sighed. I really didn't want to get into this if I was being paranoid over nothing.

"I had to push Mike away from me again."

"What?"Alice asked. Rosie looked up from her plate.

"Yeah, he seems to be getting more comfortable with me. He tried to grab me around the waist the other day. I just laughed it off, but…" I didn't want to go into detail about how skeevy it made me feel.

"No worries, I'll mention it to Emmett and see what he thinks." Rosie said.

"Rose, you don't have to do that. He's harmless."

"No, that fucktard needs to learn some manners if he's starting to get handsy with you. We'll let security deal with him. Period." She said, her eyes blazing.

Alice nodded in agreement.

"Ok, if you think that's best."

"I do. Now, I think what Alice _really_ wants to know is how her brother is treating you nowadays."

Leave it to Rose to get straight to the heart of the matter. She looked at me closely, but I couldn't help the little grin that formed on my lips as I thought about him.

"Well, he's been very nice; you guys have seen him off the clock. He's a drill sergeant during our shifts, but I think he may be coming around."

"Umm hmm," she said, pushing the remaining macaroni and cheese on her plate to the side.

"What?" I was confused. I thought that had been a positive answer. He was still _Major Pain_, but hell, I didn't want to kill him anymore.

"Bella, how many times do I have to tell you that he wants you so bad, he can taste it?" Alice asked, taking the tone of a preschool teacher.

I just stared at her.

"You know hunter green is his favorite color?"

The laugh that came out of me after hearing that little nugget of info sounded like an insane hyena.

"Please, that man doesn't want me." I pulled the crust off of the rest of my sandwich. "Hell, I'm doing good just to be able to say that he might actually like me."

Rosie raised an eyebrow, so I clarified. "Not like me like me, just like me as a friend, you Goober."

Alice shook her head as she gathered up our trash. "You are so dim sometimes."

How was I being dim? These were facts!

"What are you talking about? If _Plastic Boobs_ Barbie is any indication of what he likes, then I am the _furthest_ thing from it!"

"Ah, but that means you've thought about it." Rose said.

"Why does that mean that?"

"It means you've paid enough attention to put it away in your mental Rolodex. You feel like _Mahnolo Blahnik_ Barbie is what he looks for in a woman, but you have to remember, he dropped that crazy bitch like a bad habit. You, my dear, are the opposite of _that_." She said.

_She could be a smart cookie when she wanted to be._

_Shit._

"Look, I'm just glad that things are cool now. Let's just leave it at that, huh?" I asked, desperately wanting to get out of this before I let my true feelings show.

"Say what you want, Bells, but I see it. And I know you. You are going to think and think and think some more about what _might_ happen or what _could_ go wrong. You can't live your life like that. You can't keep shutting yourself down because of the dickheads you've kept company with. You are smart, you are funny as hell and you are a knock out. You are what guys consider a catch and Edward wants to be the one doing the catching. You just have to throw it!" She said as Alice gave her a high five before sitting back down next to me.

Pointing her finger squarely in my face, she continued. "You need to let it happen if it's going to, and I have the sneaking suspicion that it is. Just wait."

Alice and I both snickered a little at Rosie and her commentary. She was so Mother Hen and hysterical when she got up on that soapbox of hers. But I knew how to fuck with her like nobody else could.

"I know, right? Because your little playground love note was _so_ inspired." I rolled my eyes to add extra effect. It was a low blow, sure, but I had to say something stupid to counterbalance the rightness of her statement and to take the heat off of me. That only seemed to work her up more.

She gave me the finger and set her sights on Alice.

"I can't imagine what you're laughing at, Shorty. The same thing goes for you. If being with Jasper makes you happy, then damn it, you _be_ with Jasper. Edward will get the hell over it. And like I said, you can say what you want, but my little playground love note got me what I wanted, didn't it?" Alice and I straightened right the fuck up after that as she went on and on, picking up her own tray and mine to take to the garbage.

"I wish you bitches would just be happy already! Shit. All this angst and drama is tiring as hell. I'll never understand why we always let what other people think keep us down and hold us back. Life is too damn short as it is…"

I let the truth of those words hang in the air. I didn't even have a comeback for her.

_Was that what I wanted? Could I put myself out there with only a wing and a prayer that I wouldn't be shut down or hurt again? Lord knows I wanted Edward, in a bad way, but was I strong enough for that? Would I ever be strong enough?_

I wasn't sure that I would be.

As we stood to leave, Alice turned me toward her, serious as a heart attack.

"Bella, you and Rosie are my sisters, but _you _will be my sister in law before it's all said and done."

_Aaaagh! What?_

She turned and walked away, tapping her forehead and leaving me stunned and standing there with my mouth wide open.

"Shut your mouth, sweetie, you _know_ I know…"

_Son of a…_

I blinked a few times and caught up with them when my legs could move again.

"Alice, you have gone completely bonkers and Rose, you need to come up with a better nickname for _Blonde Ambition_ Barbie because I would _love_ to be a _Mahnolo Blahnik_ Barbie, so that bitch can't have it."

We laughed all the way to the car.

xx_C_xx

My feathers were still sufficiently ruffled after Alice's little prophesy. She had an uncanny way of knowing things, but she couldn't possibly be right about this one. That Joker could barely tolerate me.

"So what's on the agenda for the rest of the night?" Rose asked as she fiddled around with the IPod.

"Well, I have an early conference call with the Chicago Tourist Authority about adding us to their visitors' guide, so I was thinking we would have a good old fashioned movie night at my place?"

"Sounds good to me, I don't have class until tomorrow afternoon." I said, resting my head on one of the many shopping bags that had been stuffed into the yellow Beetle. I really just wanted to chill. I loved my girls, but they could take a lot out of you.

"Cool, we can order something on pay per view."

Alice had the cutest little condo. The entire first floor was done in purples. Very monochromatic with different shades and textures sprinkled throughout. The stairs led to her second floor. The entire thing was just a wide opened space. It was her bedroom, but the rest of it was filled with clothes and shoes. The only doors in the place were the front door, the patio door and the bathrooms.

We filed in and prepared for our night of relaxing. I went and got the tank top and boy shorts that I kept here and Rose opened a bottle of Ciroq as she popped popcorn.

"Here Rose, this nightshirt should fit you." Alice said as she tossed the shirt over the banister.

"Hell yea it should fit. It's my shirt!" She laughed, pulling the shirt on over her clothes.

"Whatever!" Alice chuckled.

I sat on the couch and picked up the remote that was sitting next to a shiny, new black Xbox 360 and a shitload of games.

"Alice, since when do you play Xbox?" I yelled.

"Umm…that's Jazz's."

My head spun toward Rosie who was stripping in the kitchen. She nodded, knowing exactly what I was thinking about the Xbox.

_Interesting._

I scrolled through the options on pay per view and decided that we should end the night on a high note.

"Hey, what do you guys think about Zack and Miri Make a Porno?"

Rose walked past me with her glass of Ciroq and orange juice, plopping down in front of the stereo system in the corner of the room."That's cool. I'm not really gonna care in a minute, though."

"I love that movie!" Alice yelled from upstairs.

Seeing as how we had some time before we'd all be ready, I got up to make myself a drink in the kitchen. "Hurry up then!"

"Ooh, hold on a second. Do you remember this song, Bella?" Rose asked, forgoing the Ipod doc and putting in a CD. "I've had it in my head all day!"

The bass vibrated through the walls of the condo as she turned the stereo up.

The opening of the song gave me a shiver, jogging my memory and putting me in a place that I had forgotten about.

"Of course I remember this song. How could I forget?"

This was the theme song from fall quarter of our sophomore year. That was after that awful summer, the last one I had spent at home. I had spent the entire time, crying and heartbroken, over Riley. June and September had been like night and day. I can remember being so glad once I started feeling more and more like myself. That was when this song was put into its heaviest rotation. I saw the light at the end of the tunnel and had been able to finally see the forest for the trees. Grant it, I was maybe only 65 to 70 percent at the time, but it was a vast improvement. Hell, I had even stopped listening to music for awhile because it always ended in me remembering something else about him. The crying fits would start all over again. Charlie thought I had gone nuts. He had even suggested that I transfer to a school in Florida so I could be closer to my mom. That wasn't gonna happen though, so I put on a happy mask for him. Because I had gone home for the summer, the girls had to help me through it by phone and Skype since Alice was a Chicago native and Rose worked on campus as a student liaison. By the time fall rolled around, I had come back to school with a fresh, new, slightly jaded perspective on life. I had even gotten my first tattoo.

When the words started, I closed my eyes and sang along, almost automatically…

_My best friend say,_

_She's sick of me, cryin' on the phone_

_Tellin' how my man be doggin' me._

_My best friend say,_

_Don't tell her nothin' 'bout me and you_

_Cause she ain't showin' me no sympathy._

_My best friend say,_

_If she was me_

_She'da let you go a long, long, time ago._

_My best friend say,_

_My best friend say…._

Alice had to have jumped down half the flight of stairs because her feet hit the ground just in time to take the lead.

_I – I – I'll be there…_

_I'll still be there for you_

_In your time of need_

_You can lean on me,_

_Come on…_

_I'll be there for you…_

_I'll be there for you_

_In your time of need_

_You can lean on me,_

_Come on…_

_I'll be there for you._

Rosie came along and twirled me around, drink still in hand. By now, we were all dancing and singing at the top of our lungs.

_My best friend say,_

_I can stay with her, at her house _

_No doubt, anytime I like._

_My best friend say,_

_Don't let you in my life_

_Cause you don't do for me_

_And you don't act right_

_My best friend say,_

_If she was me_

_She would let you go long, long, time ago._

_My best friend say,_

_My best friend say…._

_I'll still be there for you_

_In your time of need_

_You can lean on me,_

_Come on…_

_I'll be there for you_

_In your time of need_

_You can lean on me,_

_Come on…_

_I'll be there for you._

_Hey, hey, hey hey yeah…_

Once the song ended, we laughed and hugged each other, each of us grateful to have found such good friends in each other.

"Ah, good times…" Rose trailed off.

"Better times," I corrected.

"Ok, love fest time is over. I'm gonna go up and change for real now," Alice said, taking two steps at a time.

"Hurry up, Pip Squeak!" Rose laughed.

Once Alice came back downstairs in her night clothes, Rose passed out blankets and I ordered the flick. Before she could get comfortable and I could hit play, there was a loud knock at the door.

"Bella, will you grab the popcorn and a couple of bowls? I invited some company over," she said as she made her way to the door.

My heartbeat picked up its pace.

_No. No, she wouldn't have. Of course not…_

Before I could even ask, the doorway was filled with testosterone. There stood Emmett, Jasper, and Edward, holding a six each of Corona's and Heineken's.

"Ladies! Who wants to catch the first beat down in Guitar Hero? I brought my shiny, new glow in the dark drumsticks!" Emmett said.

_Fuck. My. Life._

xx_C_xx

**A/N: Thanks for reading! **

**Go Bucks! **

**Playlist is on my profile and enjoy the long holiday weekend!**


	9. I Like It

**As per usual…**

Quotes, songs and lyrics belong to their respective writers and/or artists.

Sadly enough, I don't own anything related to Twilight. I do own my original characters and my original story. No copyright infringement is intended.

I do not have a beta, so my apologies in advance.

Hate it or love it…let me know. Matter of fact, tell a friend!

**Thanks to all those still reading and reviewing for me. **

**Makes my day!**

**Shouts to brittney101 this week…we won!**

**Chapter 9 – I Like It…**

_**Stop thinking in terms of limitations and start thinking in terms of possibilities. **_

_**- Terry Josephson**_

**EPOV**

As soon as Alice opened the door, I saw Bella standing next to the sofa with a look of absolute horror. I couldn't do a thing to stop the grin it put on my face to see her all disheveled and caught off guard. She was always so careful and restrained when she was around me.

_Watchful and reserved_…_Always_. The sick bastard inside of me found it to be a rare treat to see her just the slightest bit off balance.

Clearly, she and Rosalie weren't expecting us as they were in their bed clothes. Alice was such a sneaky little shit. I'd have to come up with a way to thank her for calling Jasper when she did.

"Saddle up, Gents. We've been invited to a sleep over!" he had said.

Emmett and I were both confused as fuck, but got in the car anyway. He explained what he meant when we got to the 7-11 to buy some beer. I was cool to sleep in my underwear if we ended up staying overnight, but we had to stop off at Emmett's place first for two reasons. First, he had gone commando today and second, he wanted to grab his drumsticks.

At least he had the decency to keep the priorities of the extra trip we had to make on his account in the right order.

Rosalie ran past us up the stairs with a blanket wrapped tightly around her lower half, but Bella was still as frozen as a statue. Blinking, but not moving. Breathing for sure because I couldn't help but catch her nipples puckering under the snug, white material of her top as the rise and fall of her chest told us she was alive. Still, not moving a muscle, but definitely alive.

"Hey," I said as everybody began to disperse.

I took a step closer to her, out of sheer animal magnetism, it would seem.

She blinked a little, and then thawed out of her frozen state.

"Hey," she replied, "What are you guys doing here?"

_Let's see..._I _was aching to see you? Dying to be near you?_

Truth be told, I was. She had the night off, so my heart just wasn't in the restaurant or the bar today. All three of us played hooky after going in and making sure everything that needed to be handled was. We were over at Jaspers' place shooting the shit, but my mind kept wandering to Bella and what she was up to for the night.

"We were invited, I think. At least that's what I was told. Are we crashing?"

She shrugged, pretending to be much more comfortable with the situation than she really was. "It's all news to me. Here, let me put some of that in the refrigerator."

She took the Coronas out of my hand and walked into the kitchen with me following closely behind her. She was right _there_, close enough for me to reach out and touch her, in that sinful white wife beater and a pair of the skimpiest boy shorts or whatever they were called that I'd ever seen in my life.

_To make matters worse, those fuckers were green, too…_

It amazed me the way such a small frame could jiggle _oh so correctly_. She reached up to put a few bottles of beer into the freezer. She turned and smiled a little as she grabbed a few Heineken's from me to add as well.

"Like what you see?" Rosalie whispered, sneaking up behind me.

With the mouth on Emmett, I should have known that it would only be a matter of time before Rosalie was giving me shit, too.

"Umm…what do you mean?" I asked, hoping the mother hen of their group was in good spirits tonight.

"I've got my eye on you, Mister." She slurred a bit as she moved closer, poking me in the chest with one of her sharp acrylic nails. "You had better watch yourself because you can't play a _player_. I know your game and you had better be on the up and up if what I've been hearing is true."

_Good spirits indeed. _I opted to look past the player remark, hoping she was referring to herself.

"Rosalie, dear, how much have you had to drink?" I asked; amused by how her disoriented wobble didn't stop her from protecting her friend.

"Not nearly enough." She paused, reaching around me for the open bottle of Ciroc.

"For damn sure not enough for you to take what I'm saying to you right now for a joke. I like you, Edward, but Bella is not a toy. She's been through some things and I won't have you playing with her. If you aren't serious, you need to take whatever thoughts you have in your head about her right on out of that door."

I was stunned silent. Her rant was unexpected, true, but I was more impressed at how she still had her faculties about her in order to keep her warning to me discreet. Bella was still rearranging things in the refrigerator, completely oblivious to her best friend kicking my ass on the down low.

"Rosalie, I…"

"Come on, you Big Turkeys! Let's get this game started. I've got the Red Hot Chili Peppers on deck and I'm Flea!" Emmett yelled from the living room, saving me for all intents and purposes. I really wasn't sure what I was supposed to say in response to Rosalie, but I knew my feelings were genuine and I needed to stay on her good side.

Her eyes cut over to Bella just as she was closing the freezer door, effectively letting me know that now was not the time for me to respond.

She sipped her drink and sauntered right past me, but not before leaving me with something to chew on.

"Don't forget what I said, Fucker. If you hurt one hair on her head, I will bring a rain storm of pain into your ridiculously handsome life."

_Well damn. _

xx_C_xx

She was all flushed from her all too short stint of dancing.

Singing and dancing.

Somewhere in between Sweet Child o' Mine and Pearl Jam, I settled my head onto the back of the couch.

"_Edward," she whispered, the tip of her tongue running along the shell of my ear at an agonizingly slow pace. "What took you so long? You know I've been waiting for you…"_

"_Not as long as I've been waiting for you, baby." I said._

_Some way, somehow, she was seated fully in my lap, straddling me as I sat on Alice's Barney purple couch. I held onto her for dear life, my hands splayed across the flesh of her creamy, flawless back. So soft. So supple…_

_Her fingers pressed almost painfully with want against my torso, playing about the ridges of my stomach, toying with the waistband of my boxers._

"_There's no need to wait anymore then, hmm? I'm right here." She purred._

_As she let her lips and tongue take advantage of my neck and chin, I allowed my hands to settle onto the firm, taught curve of her ass, kneading and grasping, memorizing the rise and fall of her shape as we roamed each other's form, our bodies grinding together relentlessly. The tune in the air was wildly staccato in my ears. It was familiar, helping us build upon the delicious friction that we were creating, that we both craved. We picked up a steady rhythm, her body playing into the melody that she was drawing out of mine._

"_Bella, you are so fucking…perfect," the feel of her making me halfway incoherent. "I've – I've wanted you, no, needed you, for so long. Please tell me you feel it, too."_

_She licked her way across my cheek, stopping at the corner of my mouth. _

_I wanted her lips on mine so badly, but she stopped short, sucking and twirling her tongue on that same spot and driving me mad…_

"_Does it kill? Does it burn? Is it painful to learn that it's me that has all the control?" She asked; her voice losing that huskiness that she had just a moment ago._

…_wait. What?_

My eyes popped open and I surveyed the scene before me.

_Rosalie would probably beat the living shit out of me if she knew what was running through my mind just now._

Apparently, I wasn't the only one stuck in a daze, only mine was the result of a stupid daydream. The lights in the room were dimmed, highlighting the colorful glow coming off of the huge plasma screen. I was still on that horribly purple couch, nursing a Heineken, but Bella wasn't with me. She stood just off to my right, singing her heart out to Maroon 5. Jasper was sitting in a chair to my left, legs propped up on the arm with his tongue stuck out, concentrating hard on hitting his guitar riffs. Rosalie was standing up, wearing a nightshirt, a pair of capri sweatpants and a pin striped fedora, looking all the part of a quirky bass player. Emmett was wailing on the drums with sticks that glowed neon blue. Ironically, they were playing Harder to Breathe at expert level:

_Does it kill?  
>Does it burn?<br>Is it painful to learn  
>that it's me that has all the control?<em>

_Does it thrill?_  
><em>Does it sting<em>  
><em>when you feel what I bring<em>  
><em>and you wish that you had me to hold?<em>

_When it gets cold outside and you got nobody to love,_  
><em>you'll understand what I mean when I say<em>  
><em>there's no way we're gonna give up.<em>

_And like a little girl cries in the face of a monster that lives in her dreams,__  
><em>

_Is there anyone out there? 'Cause it's getting harder and harder to breathe.  
><em>

_Is there anyone out there? 'Cause it's getting harder and harder to breathe.  
><em>

_Is there anyone out there? 'Cause it's getting harder and harder to breathe…_

Jasper and Emmett fist bumped as they basked in the applause of the simulated audience on the screen.

"You guys take this shit way too seriously for my taste."

Jasper scoffed. "Fuck you. Our band is kicking ass in career mode and we just played the _shit_ outta that song."

"That's the best performance that the House of Blues has seen tonight. And don't act like you haven't rocked out with us before, Shithead." Emmett said, pointing his glow sticks at me.

He was right of course, because I owned the lead guitar, but they had intruded on my dream just when it was about to get good, so I had the right to be an asshole and rain on their parade.

"Whatever. Where's Alice?"

"She wasn't cutting it on vocals, so we kicked her out and put Bella on full time." Rosalie said in an ice cold tone, looking down at the bass in her hand as if it were a real instrument.

"Not you too, Rosalie. Tell me they haven't brought you over to the dark side."

"That wasn't our doing. If you're gonna blame anybody, blame Miss Bella over there, who's a natural, by the way." Jasper said.

I look over and Bella is dabbing at her blushing face, neck and chest with a napkin, her skin glistening.

_Shit…_

"Guitar Hero, huh?" I asked, taking a long swig of my beer while suppressing both my lust and active imagination.

She giggled a little and came over and sat next to me on the couch.

I fucking loved that sound, especially when it was in response to me.

"Guilty. I love singing on that microphone and it gives me a rush. Especially when it's a song I like. Singing was one thing that I could always do with my mom and feel good about it. She never got mad at me for being off key or for what song it was. That's probably one of the reasons that I seem to make a mike out of anything I can grab a hold of." She responded bashfully.

_How cute is she? And she's talking. To me. About herself._

That alone was enough to engage me.

"I like Maroon 5, too. This song is kinda bitter for a game, though." I said, noting how the tone of the song and the passion that she held behind those words set alarms blaring in my head, especially with Rosalie's speech fresh in my mind.

"Eh, I don't know. Maybe a little, but Adam Levine is fucking awesome. I love most of his stuff. There's a lot of feeling in this one, though. I don't know if bitter is what I would call it, I just feel like he's pissed and releasing his frustration. That's normal. That's universal. It's easy to get caught up in it…like you saw. I guess it's an easy song to relate to since we all feel that way sometimes."

"Yeah, I can understand that, for sure."

And I could. I felt honored to be made privy to the small glimpse of herself that she was giving me, hanging onto that tiny sliver of her mind like a fat kid to candy. I was dying for her to give me some examples, for her to give me just a little more, but I'd tuck that conversation away for another day.

"Besides, Emmett wanted to play it since the drum part was pretty challenging." She said with a laugh.

"Damn straight and I killed that shit!" Emmett added, twirling the sticks in his hands. "You guys weren't too bad either."

"Well thank you so much for acknowledging the fact that we were there playing with you," she laughed.

"Never let it be said that I didn't give credit where it was due," he said as she stood and ruffled his hair.

She went in the kitchen, flipping the light switch on in the living room as she went and poured a glass of water. "Where did everybody go?"

"Umm, Rose went upstairs and I think Jazz went to find Alice," Emmett answered.

"To find Alice? Why would he feel the need to go find Alice?" I asked.

"Well, uh, you see…" he stumbled.

Everybody had been playing their part in the 'keep Edward in the dark about Alice and Jasper' drama over the last few days. It was cute at first, but now it was starting to get on my nerves. I would ask questions or point out where one of them had messed up just to watch them back track and try to correct themselves.

_Idiots._

"I think Jasper felt bad because he laughed the loudest when she got kicked out of the band," Bella blurted out, saving Emmett from digging himself deeper in the hole.

_Et tu, Bella?_

I looked at her skeptically, but couldn't really fault her for unnecessarily helping my sister.

"Hmm. I guess that makes sense. She must've been pretty upset." I said.

"Nah, I wasn't too upset. I sucked pretty bad compared to Bella. I just went and put some laundry in until they finished," Alice said, coming around the corner with Jasper just as Rosalie descended the stairs.

"So what did you exciting, attractive, vivacious ladies have next on your sleep over agenda?" Jasper asked. I couldn't tell if he was being sarcastic or just overly complimentary.

"We actually had a movie cued up before you guys got here," Bella said, taking her seat on the couch next to me again. "And we were supposed to be relaxing tonight, Jazz."

"Yeah, we can't always be the life of your party," Rosalie added, taking a seat on the loveseat while snacking on some popcorn.

"What movie?" I asked. I didn't really give a shit what movie. It didn't matter, just so she stayed where she was, I'd be a happy man.

"Zack and Miri make a Porno," Rosalie answered.

Emmett shot beer through his nose. "Best. Sleepover. Ever!"

"Calm down, Perv. It's about that, but it's not really about _that_," she clarified.

"Oh, ok. I was about to say."

Bella threw a pillow at his head, "You wish."

He pretended to think a little. "Yeah, I think I do."

Jasper gave him a high five.

Alice walked by and grabbed the remote off of the table, taking a seat on the floor, coincidentally right in front of the chair that Jazz had just sat in.

"Animals. Emmett, make yourself useful. Grab the popcorn and hit the lights." She barked.

By the time he grabbed the popcorn and several smaller bowls, we had all settled in to watch the flick. Emmett had Rosalie wrapped securely in both his arms and a blanket on the loveseat while Jasper not so covertly played in Alice's hair from his seat in a way that I'm sure he thought I wouldn't notice. Bella and I were still together on the sofa…with an entire couch cushion separating us.

Jasper smirked over at me once he noticed me eying the distance and mouthed, "Pussy."

I just gave him the finger.

I had to admit, the movie was funny as hell. The laughter started immediately and continued throughout. Bella would make a comment to me every now and then or I'd ask her something about one scene or another, but she kept a relatively safe distance between us.

Once we arrived at the part where Zack and Miri had their infamous love scene in the back of the coffee shop, I looked over to see all three of the girls in awe. _Damn._ If that's all it took, then I was going about this thing all wrong. The moral of the story hadn't escaped me though. It meant something because they cared for each other. They cared for each other because they had spent so much time as friends, building a foundation and getting to know one another on a more basic, but much deeper level. They didn't realize it before, but the culmination of all of those things into this supposedly meaningless act had made it an important moment for the both of them.

_I got that. _

I just wasn't sure how it could be implemented into a real life scenario, one without a script or happy ending already written into the last page.

I picked up the forgotten bowl of popcorn and offered it to Bella who was tucked into the other end of the couch, warm and cozy underneath a blanket. She absently stuck her hand into the bowl without taking her eyes off of the screen.

I just chuckled and went back to watching.

Before the end of the movie, I looked down and Bella was fast asleep, snoring lightly with her head on my shoulder. I hadn't even noticed her inching closer to me or me to her, but here we were. I'd definitely have a crick in my neck by morning.

_Best. Sleepover. Ever._

xx_C_xx

"Gianna, I need you to run back and tell Felix that table 12 needed those oyster appetizers three minutes ago." I said between gritted teeth.

My manager shift tonight meant that I was full on in both the restaurant and the bar. Jasper wasn't bar tending, so I had to make sure Garrett had everything he needed with our two new bar maids working with him. Leah and Bree had both done fine so far, but I wasn't the type to take any chances.

"Bella, how is everything going with the large party in the next room?" I asked.

She had tried to take on the responsibility by herself, but once she realized that a party of 19 people was no cake walk, she had come back, against her will, looking for reinforcements. I may have pulled out my manager card and told her that she didn't have a choice in the matter, but that's neither here nor there. Rosalie and Jessica stepped in and assisted.

"Things are really good. I just took silverware, dessert plates and napkins in because they're about to cut the birthday cake they brought with them."

She answered in the positive, but looked a little down.

"Good, I'm glad to hear it. You know there's no shame in asking for help when you need it. That would have been too much on you had you tried to handle it all on your own. Even the best have to have assistance sometimes. Even if it's just to help you carry your trays. That party is a perfect example of that." I said, hoping to lift her spirits a little.

"I know. I just wanted to take care of it."

"And you did. By giving them the very best service that you could. Now they'll think of us for other events or just when they want to come out and have a bite to eat in a nice, friendly place."

She looked up at me from the imaginary piece of string on her shirt and smiled.

And then I smiled because she smiled.

"Mr. Cullen?"

And just like that, the moment was gone.

"Mr. Cullen, the people at table 12 would like to speak with a manager." Gianna said as she strode over towards us.

Bella immediately tensed up and retied her apron, walking past Gianna to check on her party. They not so subtlety bumped into one another, causing Gianna to damn near trip on her own heels. I couldn't help but notice how Gianna mouthed the word _"bitch"_ in Bella's direction. God only knows what Bella mouthed in reply since her back was turned to me. With friends like my sister and Rosalie on her side, I smirked as I thought of the possibilities.

"I'll head over in just a second."

I turning back to the receipts that I had been looking over.

I waited a moment because I still felt eyes on me. I looked up only to confirm that she hadn't moved. She just stood there, grinning at me like a loon. This wasn't the first time and it was starting to make me uncomfortable. I'd hate to have to let her go over something stupid; she really seemed to know what she was doing otherwise.

"Was there something else?" I asked.

She looked at me with her dark green eyes in a way that I'm sure was meant to be a sexy.

"No, nothing at all. I just like watching…you…in action."

_Shit…_

"Well, you don't actually get paid for that. I'm sure you have other customers to attend to while I go check on table 12."

My voice was stern, hoping to get my point across without having to actually sidestep her misguided advances.

"Mr. Cullen, I've actually been wanting to get a moment alone with you."

_Shit…_

"I can't imagine why, Gianna." I could feel my patience wearing unbelievably thin.

She took a few baby steps toward me. "Well, Edward, I've noticed you watching me and I'm sure you've noticed me watching you. I was sort of hoping…"

I could see her hand moving toward me out of my peripheral. I could allow her to continue and promptly let her go, or I could do her a solid and give her a warning before she went too far. She was lucky that today had been a good day.

"Alright, I'm going to stop you right there. I'm not going to fire you right here or right now because you don't know much about me, with you being new and all. Understand that you won't ever know much about me. You are a Clarity employee and I am your boss. That's really all that you need to know."

Disbelief covered her features.

Surely getting turned down wasn't something she was used to. She had to be at least 5' 6", long black hair, and olive skin. I hated having to be the one to pop her cherry…and her bubble.

"If the need to have another conversation like this arises, you will be fired on the spot. Is that understood?"

"Yes, Edward." She responded with a fair amount of venom behind her eyes. I had to give her credit, though. She was smart enough to take me at my word, turning to walk away and continuing on with her duties.

"Oh, and Gianna?"

"Yes?"

"Don't call me anything other than Mr. Cullen from now on."

She nodded and kept going.

_That one was for Bella._

xx_C_xx

The end of the night couldn't have come fast enough. We were super busy and I had been pushed and pulled into a million different directions. But, all in all, I would say it was a successful evening.

Aside from utilizing every spare moment I had watching or conversing with Bella, I had gotten a great deal accomplished.

"Long night, huh?"

I looked up as Bella made her way to the bar where I was finishing up my organizing of the receipts. I know it's an OCD tendency, Jasper and I would just end up going through them all again in one of our offices upstairs. It's a waste of both time and energy, but just as I've always told Alice…

_I gotta do what I gotta do._

Plus it will keep me from going insane and that's beneficial for everybody in the long run.

"Yes, a very long night. We did well, though. How'd you do?"

I nodded toward her hands that were currently digging through her apron pocket.

"I did great! I made a few hundred dollars, easy. "

She was beaming with pride. So much so, it made me want to grab her and hug her to me, tight. She was flourishing, just like I knew she would. It sucked that I couldn't just outwardly show her that, not the way I really wanted to. We were friends.

_Just friends._

I should be happy as hell that we had made it this far, and I was, but it was eating away at my insides. It was gnawing away at my subconscious. It was consuming my every thought, waking and otherwise.

I knew that I could change the tenor of everything with just one question, one inference that I wanted to take it another step, move it along. I could do that, but if I were being honest, I was afraid. I was afraid of derailing all of the progress that we had made. I was afraid of her shutting me out just when she was starting to open up to me. I was afraid of fucking up.

"Speaking of tips, I'm surprised Rosie isn't out here yet." She said, looking around as the other waitresses started to gather.

"Come on, Bella, it's time to go check on tonight's Kitty Kat!" Rosalie said as she came up on Bella's other side.

"I'm sorry, what is it time for?" I asked.

They both stopped and looked at each other before turning to me with matching, evil grins.

"What's wrong, Edward? You never heard the girls' around here talking about the Kitty?"

I know my eyes had to pop out of my head while I stood, watching Bella's lips as she enunciated the word _Kitty_. She moved her lips deliberately and with predetermination. She said it with purpose while the curve of her juicy lips was really all of the purpose she needed. This girl had a dirty side.

_I liked it. I liked it a lot._

"I _know_ you've heard us talking about our tips before, Edward." Rosalie said, stifling her laughs.

"Yeah, I know I have, I guess I've just never paid attention before."

"Hmm. Wonder why you're paying attention now?" She teased as she went over towards the other girls.

"Ha ha ha."

That was my brilliant response.

Bella made a move to follow her, but something inside of me made me reach out and lightly grab her arm, causing her to stop in her tracks.

It was all kinds of stupid, I know, but I had to do _something_. There were people all around us, but I couldn't let the night pass without spending more time with her. My every thought was her anymore. The urge to confess my feelings was great, but I beat it down into submission. I had to find out more. I wanted to know all of the little things, what made her tick, what moved her.

Every fiber of my being screamed at me to take it slow, and I agreed, but _shit_. She sent chills up my spine every time I took a look at her. We were moving at a snail's pace and I needed to prove, for once and for all, that I was not a pussy.

_To myself and to Jasper. _

She eyed me as I went to war with myself. My palms were actually starting to sweat. My mouth had gone as dry as the Sahara.

_Fuck it. I couldn't take it anymore._

"Hey, Bella, would you want to grab a bite to eat some time?"

She looked up at me, big doe eyes, all warm and melted chocolate.

Before she could answer, Emmett walked up and showed me his dumb side. "Dude, I'm hungry as hell. A bite to eat would be perfect. You guys want to get cleaned up and do Howard's? I could go for one of those big ass steaks."

"Oooh, Howard's? Let's do it! I want to get all dressed up and pretty tonight! We could do the town!" Alice squealed as she quickly walked past us, already dialing on her phone.

_What the…? Where the hell did all of these people come from?_

I shut my eyes, hoping like hell that I wouldn't let out the scream that was clawing its way out of my chest. I had just gotten up the nerve to ask Bella out and these douche bags just came in and shut my shit down! They were seriously starting to cramp my style.

"I'd love to grab a bite to eat, Edward," Bella whispered.

I opened my eyes and whipped my head around, hoping I had heard her correctly.

"Yeah?" I asked.

"Yeah, I'm hungry and everybody else seems to be, too. Plus, I've never been to Howard's. It's kinda fancy, right?"

"Oh, umm, right. A little. We'd have to dress up. Ties and jackets and all of that."

She didn't want to go out with me; she wanted to go out with _everybody_. Like usual. Like _friends_.

_Fuck._

"Bella! You know you can only keep the Kitty waiting but so long!" Rosalie hollered from across the bar.

Bella chuckled as she turned to join her associates.

I could still be a man and admit that I felt defeated. I had finally gotten the balls to ask her out and it turned into another group excursion in the twinkling of an eye. All things considered, though, I suppose it could be worse. I'd still get to spend some time with her…

"We really need to limit how much time she's spending with Emmett," she said.

I looked up quickly and found her still standing next to me, curves and chocolate and awesome, before she winked at me and turned on her heel.

_The twinkling of an eye might not be such a bad thing after all._

I watched her as she gathered with her friends and slammed her money on the bar like she was playing dominoes. Slow and steady was what I was going to have to rely on to win this race, I knew that much. It was gonna be a bitch. I knew that much too. It was going to test all of my strength and my very will as a man, but as I pealed back each beautiful, flavorful, intense layer that was _my_ Bella, I realized that I was alright with that.

As a matter of fact, I think I liked it.

_I really, really liked it._


	10. Just Friends?

**As per usual…**

Quotes, images, songs, and lyrics belong to their respective writers and/or artists.

Sadly enough, I _don't_ own anything related to Twilight. I _do_ own my original characters and my original story. No copyright infringement is intended.

I do not have a beta, so my apologies in advance. Anyone willing to take on the task, I'd love to chat with you!

Hate it or love it…let me know. Matter of fact, tell a friend! I won't mind!

**Chapter 10 – Just Friends?**

_**Love is friendship set on fire. - **__**Jeremy Taylor**_

**BPOV**

"Hey Edward, we're going to get outta here so we can start getting ready. You guys want to meet us at Bella and Rosie's by say eight? Our reservation is at nine." Alice said as she ushered me out of the restaurant towards her car. Rose followed behind us after we had pulled her tongue out of Emmett's mouth.

"Alice, what's your rush? We still have plenty of time before our reservation. Chill!"

"Bella, do you not realize what just happened back there?"

"Um, we all decided to go out to dinner together?"

"Bella, you just got asked out on your first date with Edward! I think I deserve a little credit for waiting this long to pull you out of there!"

The girl was damn near bouncing out of the drivers' seat.

_What?_

"No, he didn't. You are absolutely delusional."

"I don't know, Bells. I think the little Pixie may have something there." Rose added, picking at the cuticles in her fiery red nail beds.

"Bull shit." I said as I watched the city lights going by much faster than they really needed to.

Edward had asked me if I wanted to "get a bite to eat." _Yeah, I know it, I was there._ _Big whoop_. Friends go out and share meals all the time, right? Why would this be any different than all of the other times we had had food in each other's company? My head told me that I was right, prudent even. This was just like any other day.

It _was_ a Friday night out, but nothing special. We would eat, we would talk, and we would laugh. Knowing Rose, we'd hit a club. He'd get hit on by some fabulous, busty blonde. I'd get hit on by some drunk, desperate loser. Just another day in the life.

The butterflies floating and flitting about in my belly, on the other hand, were telling me something altogether different. I knew about those damned butterflies, though. They were all pretty and appealing at first glance but, if you looked at them closely, they were really just slugs with a nice outfit on. The butterflies couldn't be trusted and never turned out to mean anything good when they came around.

_At least they hadn't so far_.

I ignored them and went back to watching the streetlights.

xx_C_xx

Once we were in our apartment, Rose and Alice both tried shoving me into the shower while I tried to talk some sense into them.

"Ok, ok. Geez. I know I worked all day, but I can't smell that bad. And don't forget, I was there. I heard it all for myself. Going out to some fancy place for dinner wasn't even Edward's idea. It was Emmett's."

"That all makes sense, but you do realize that he could have objected if he wanted to, right?" Rose asked.

"Yes, and he also could have objected to all of us doing something together, but he didn't." I countered.

"True, but he's not stupid, either. Maybe he _liked_ the idea of us being around. You know, to take some of the pressure off?"

"But I thought that's what most guys wanted. The more 'pressure' we can apply, the better?" I laughed, making my voice all breathy like Marilyn Monroe.

Rose gave me spirit fingers before heading towards her room. "That was a good one, Bells."

Alice stomped around us like a child.

"This isn't funny Bella! And you can't make a joke out of this just to make yourself feel like it's not a big deal. Hurry up and shower so Rose can do your hair and I can get your make up done before they get here. I'm gonna jump in Rose's shower once she's finished."

"Alice! I know you're Sgt. Slaughter's sister, but calm down! It's _not_ a big deal. It's just dinner!"

Alice stopped dead in her tracks, suddenly turning serious. The mood in the room went from playful and teasing to contemplative and somber in less than a second, causing me to take a pause myself. She had tossed half of my closet onto the bed and had a white sweater dress with a deep cowl neck in her clutches.

"You guys really do think that this is more than a normal night out, don't you?"

"I do!" Rose yelled from down the hall.

"Shut up! You're not helping!" I yelled back. She wasn't standing here taking in the earnest look on Alice's face the way that I was.

"You don't realize how serious this is, do you? Edward doesn't ask girls out. Hell, he's never had to!"

Her arms flailed around wildly as she grew more and more animated and agitated before pulling me down to sit with her on my bed.

"Call me a romantic lunatic if you have to, but Bella, I've never seen that look in his eyes before. I've never heard him even come close to asking a girl on a date. People thought he was just stuck up when we were younger, but that wasn't it at all. He had every right to be, but he's really kind of shy and reclusive once you get to know him. What I saw today was him stepping out of a shell that he has always been closed up in, for whatever reason. He's starting to feel comfortable with you, Bella. You did that. He got blocked by Emmett, but he meant for tonight to just be you and him. I just know it!"

Her eyes glistened with all of the truth and sincerity that she felt in what she had said. Tinker bell _truly_ believed. All we were missing was some fairy dust and a musical number. But this wasn't a fairytale and I didn't believe in magic. I wasn't Cinderella or Snow White.

"Alice, Sweetie, I love you, but you _are_ a romantic lunatic." I said, high tailing it to the shower before she could catch me.

"Ok, be like that. But just know that I can show you way better than I can tell you. Put these on, you buzz kill!" She said as she threw a black thong and a push up bra into the bathroom behind me.

xx_C_xx

I stepped into the shower, letting the warm spray soothe my aching muscles and my jumbled brain, coating my hair with shampoo. I shook my head as I thought of Alice and her cute, albeit irrational, level of optimism. That girl could find even the thinnest silver lining around something, just so long as it was sparkling. She seemed to be so certain about her brother and I. Little did she know that I burned inside from the very idea that he could want me the way that I wanted him.

I lathered up and backed out of the direct stream of water for a minute so I could shave.

She was right about some of the things she had said, though. I could tell that he was introverted and reticent when it came to certain situations. He was completely oblivious to much of the attention that he got from my co-workers and patrons at Clarity. We won't even get started on the double takes I've seen occur in public. Even as a woman that has entertained her fair share of salacious thoughts about the man, some of the things that I'd seen were downright shameful. But who could blame them for _literally_ throwing themselves at his feet? On the outside, he's simply _fantastic_.

What intrigued me, however, was what was starting to ooze from the inside. I was starting to see the parts of him that he only seemed to reserve for his inner circle…a circle that he had allowed me into. It wasn't easy or pleasant at first, but he had. It became wider as the relationship between Rose and Emmett blossomed. Jasper and Alice thought they were really being stealthy as they played intrigue and espionage around their own budding little relationship. I think it was just a turn on for them, being secretive. And then there was me. If it weren't for Edward, I'd be a fifth, sixth or seventh wheel or something. How did I fit in and where did that put him?

_No…it couldn't be possible._

_Could it?_

My loofah and lady shaver fell out of my hands as it dawned on me. Logic put us together, that much was obvious. But…what if there was more to it than that? What if the two of us fit because, normally, we wouldn't? I could feel myself starting to shake even though the water was still warm.

What if he _had_ been making a move to change our social standing in the group tonight? What if it really wasn't about the group at all? What if he really _was _trying to put the funny shaped pieces of the puzzle together? What if he was asking me out, but got sidetracked by Em and his grizzly bear appetite? What if he _was_ taking the chance that I was much too afraid to?

You know the one. The one that you take when you're playing the Sims and you flirt and wait with bated breath to see what kind of reaction your Sim gets in response? _That one_.

What if he _was _asking me out and I undercut him by suggesting that we all go out together instead? Why didn't I listen? What if he had gone out on a limb and took the risk but, for all intents and purposes, had received a rejection from me?

I frantically thought back on everything that had taken place after our dinner plans were made: We pooled our tips, I got some dirty looks from Jessica and Gianna separately, but that wasn't anything new or noteworthy. I caught his eye as I made some plans to meet up with Bree on campus to go over some of the notes that I had taken in our women's study seminar the other day, but then Alice scooped me up and shoved me into the Beetle.

_Shit…_

This whole situation had just turned a corner and I was already out of breath. Things would have to be handled even more delicately than before. I just had to pay better attention from now on. I had to read the signs in front of me. I had to play the game if I wanted to get the prize at the end. But this wouldn't be a hand of poker. Maintaining my poker face is what got me into this fucked up position in the first place. Now I was playing catch up. No, I'd have to approach this the way you approach a game of Jenga…

_With kid gloves._

My mind was telling me no. But my body? My body was telling me to get the hell out of the shower before I turned into a prune and get that thong on so I could do some research. As I rinsed the conditioner from my hair, I changed my mind about arguing with Alice over the dress that she had picked out for me. That may be a decent way to get the proverbial ball rolling. I could figure things out in my own head while being intently aware of what I had been missing, but had everyone around me certain that Edward and I had something that was worth exploring. I would pay attention to the small stuff, something that I hadn't truly been doing. I was too focused on the bigger picture. The bigger picture would always be me getting hurt in the end, just like all the other times. The only way that I could prevent that would be to gather all of the Intel that I could and walk into this, whatever it is, with my eyes wide open.

"Hey Rose? Do you think I could borrow your black knee boots? The suede ones?" I yelled.

xx_C_xx

**EPOV**

Dinner at Howard's was fantastic. It really was one of the best steak houses in the city. We all ate and drank as conversation flowed effortlessly around our table. Jasper even met up with us outside of Rosalie and Bella's apartment building.

_I wonder how that happened._

When we arrived at Rosalie and Bella's place, I wasn't sure what I had expected to see. The apartment wasn't huge, but it felt like they had made this house into a home. They were still undergraduates after all, so I was truly impressed. Things were orderly, but lived in. It was a cozy blend of their personalities, a mesh of their very different personas. The walls were a natural cream color, bringing butter pecan ice cream to mind. The couch and chairs were a neutral grayish color with bold crimson and orange pillows and coordinating striped throw rug. The lamp shades on the two lamps sitting on their end tables were a deep crimson color, covering the room in a warm, celestial glow. Adorning the walls were multitudes of candid shots all framed in a rainbow of shapes, colors and designs.

I learned a lot from those pictures.

Most of them were of Bella and Rosalie or just Bella and some of her friends or Rosalie with some of her own. They both did pee wee cheerleading and played soccer together by the looks of things. Rosalie hung out with the jocks and the cheerleaders in high school while Bella was more in tune with the individualized, bookish crowd. She and Rosalie had truly grown up together.

_I had to chuckle._

Still, most of the pictures were of them together. Many of them were pictures taken with what I could only assume were their families, showcasing them during various ages and stages of awkwardness. I was immediately drawn to the little brown haired girl with braces and a king sized pink banana clip in her hair. There was a man standing behind her with one of the meanest handle bar mustaches I had ever seen, at least aside from _my_ dad. That had to be hers. Plus, I think I remember her saying he was a cop.

"You see something interesting up there?"

I turned around and was met with a real, live, breathing angel. Her dress was simple and white, textured like a sweater and wrapped snugly around her body like an early Christmas present to me. She was ethereal in both her beauty and appeal. Luminescent. Her hair framed her face, long and loose, curled just slightly on the ends, her make-up light and complementary.

The black suede boots, however, made her look like an angel straight from the depths of hell considering the hellacious nature of my thoughts at that moment.

"Yes, yes I do actually. In fact, I'm intrigued. I love the banana clip, by the way."

Her smile gave the glowing lamp shades a run for their money.

"Ah, you found the money shot. That's a picture that Rose put up after I had lost a bet."

"Really? I would have never figured you to be a gambler. What was the bet?"

"What? You can bet on any and _every_ thing. I actually recommend it. Keeps things interesting." She said with a wink.

_I loved a playful Bella._

"You, my dear, are deflecting. What was the bet?"

"Let me think. There's a long list that goes along with that question. I think this particular bet had something to do with how long it took Charlie to trim down the 'stache.'"

We laughed together loudly, Rosalie winning the bet because her dad hadn't trimmed his moustache down in the 90's like Bella had bet. Oh no, he had actually waited until we were well into the next millennium and that was just a damn shame. We were laughing so hard, Bella had grabbed onto my arm to keep from falling over.

"Hey Bella, can you come here for a sec?" Rosalie called out, bursting our little bubble.

"She probably wants me to see what shoes she should wear tonight. I don't know why she always asks me, I'm a train wreck when it comes to shit like that," Bella said.

"No you're not. I think you always look nice," I said, feeling extremely bashful and exposed all of a sudden. "I mean, you shouldn't doubt your fashion sense. Rosalie doesn't, anyway."

The slightest bit of blush saturated her skin before she mouthed a quick thank you and turned toward the others in the room.

"If you guys will excuse me," Bella said as she wandered down the hallway with me watching each and every sway of her hips as she went.

Emmett had his entire upper body stuffed into the refrigerator while Jasper leaned against the breakfast bar, watching me with the faintest hint of a smirk on his lips.

"What the fuck are you staring at?"

"Me? Nothing. I was just waiting for you guys to kiss or fuck or something and be done with it already."

_Really?_

"Wow. Well, that's an awfully smart mouth on a guy holding an inexplicable garment bag with a fucking red dress in it." I said.

He immediately lost the smirk.

"Oh this? Umm…"

"You're slacking on your pimpin' there, sir," Emmett laughed around the apple he had found.

Jasper had turned an interesting shade of blue, his expression a mixture of frustration and embarrassment. And maybe just a splish splash of anger.

"No, I'm not. Alice asked me stop by her place on the way, so ya'll can kiss my ass."

His accent usually got more pronounced when he was worked up. He couldn't hide the nerves that had crept up into his normal cool, southern swagger.

_At least not from me he couldn't._

"Ok. But Alice came here straight from the restaurant, right? How'd you get in, Jazz?"

"Umm…I…" He stuttered, trying to come up with a believable response.

Emmett coughed loudly, either choking or masking his guffaw. No doubt it was the latter.

_Poor, poor pathetic, misguided Jazz._

He had to have it pretty bad because we usually talked about everything. Not to go all celebrating the moments of our lives or anything, but this was the first time in a long time that there was a topic that we didn't just hash out between us. No basketball game or anything.

I wouldn't push him or my sister, though. They both knew me better than anyone in the world and they had to put their heads together at some point. I couldn't wait for the day when they would give up on this stupid thing.

_Super spies, they are not._

I don't care if they're together, but Jasper and I will need to discuss. _Period._ There was no denying it and there would be no avoiding it. He knew it and she sure as fuck knew it. It's my prerogative as a big brother. But I was in a good mood, so I let him off the hook.

"Please just tell me my sister isn't wearing that." The dress was a bright, fire engine red. Let's just say that the belled out sleeves of the thing were longer than the damn skirt.

"Of course I'm wearing it, Edward. I doubt you'll be paying that much attention to me anyway." Alice said as she came into the room wearing a robe that was way too big on her.

We all tried to hold back our laughs.

"It's Rose's and I'm short, shut up!" She squealed, grabbing the hanger and rushing back toward the holy of holies in her hooker red pumps…the bedrooms.

"And stop popping up like that when the grown-ups are out here talking. It's creepy, with you being so little." I said.

I had been teasing her with that line since we were kids.

"Fuck you, Edward," she yelled.

She'd been responding that way for just as long.

xx_C_xx

We arrived at Howard's just in time for our reservation. The hostess took a few minutes to ogle Jasper and then took a few more trying to get me to look at her cleavage. Once she decided that she was fighting a battle that she couldn't win, she asked us to wait a moment while she made sure our reserved room was ready. I watched Bella as she and the girls went to the powder room.

"Edward, are you sweating?" Emmett asked.

"What? Hell no. Why would I be sweating? We just came in from outside." I said. I was nervous as fuck, but he didn't need to point it out.

"Are you gonna pull the stick out of your ass at some point? This is supposed to be fun and I'm hungry."

I glared at his silly ass.

_Like I gave two fucks about him being hungry._

"How long are you gonna be mad at me? I didn't cock block you on purpose, Bro, I swear. If I knew that you were actually asking her out on a date, I would've just taken Rosie to the Steak and Shake."

I wanted to be pissed at him, and I was, but the more I thought about it, in the car, in the shower, over a beer, in the car on the way over here, he may have done me a favor. Moving slow didn't mean asking her out on our first date at work and in front of God and country.

"Don't worry about it, Em." I said.

The girls joined us and we were shown to our private room.

xx_C_xx

Rosalie decided that a club up the street from Howard's called Cliché would be a good place to get a night cap or whatever we were looking for after filling ourselves on dinner.

"Corny," I coughed out once she told us the name of the place.

We pulled up in the two taxis that we had hailed for transportation. Jasper and Alice got into one and the rest of us in another. We walked in without any trouble from security at the front door, thanks to the beautiful ladies that accompanied us, no doubt. The baseline was bumping and the atmosphere was upbeat and festive. A party themed song was playing, getting all of the patrons in the mood to have a good time.

"_Now a party ain't a party 'til it's ran all through…"_

I recognized the song. It was an oldie but goodie.

Rosalie immediately took to the dance floor and the girls quickly followed. I was just glad to see everybody relaxed and having fun. There were a few close calls at the table during dinner where either Jasper or Alice should have or could have fessed up to their supposedly secret relationship, but they didn't. The same went for me and Bella, though, if I were being honest. In all fairness, the comfort in which we handled ourselves with each other was telling, at least to everyone sitting at the table with us.

I watched the girls dancing and enjoying the night outside of our usual spot, mindful of the assholes that could be found all around them. They were all drooling. Thirsty and predatory. Watching and waiting.

_Waiting for a chance to get all up on my girl… _

No, I couldn't do it myself without raising a few eyebrows, Bella's especially, but I'd be damned if any of them would get a chance to. I would allow the girls to enjoy themselves, but as far as I was concerned, Emmett, Jasper and I were all on security detail tonight.

I was situated on a bar stool taking the first shift when Emmett came up next to me, whispering hot and wet into my ear.

"What do chicks drink?"

I stuck my pinkie into my ear and twisted. I know I heard him correctly over the music, but I wanted to be sure without him giving me a damn swimmer's ear.

"What?"

"Man, what do chicks drink? I want to get the girls started on some drinks when they come off the dance floor. Chivalry and shit." He said.

I looked up at him because, frankly, he couldn't be serious.

"Are you for real?"

He looked back at me with a blank expression.

"Yes? I wanna be suave tonight, so I need to order a drink for Rosie. "

_I didn't want to laugh at him. Really, I didn't._

"I'm not a girl. How the fuck should I know? Order a tray of apple martinis or something." I said.

"But how the fuck do you not know? You bartend. You've had girlfriends before. Stop being a dick and help me!"

Jasper laughed at us as the bartender approached.

"May I have three Cosmos with top shelf vodka, please?" He said.

Emmett looked at him as if Hugh Hefner had just walked into the building.

"It's not that hard. Go with pretty and fruity. Sophisticated is good, too. Chicks love Cosmos cuz of Sex and the City. Alice loves that Carrie broad."

I lifted my eyebrow while he continued on with his lesson.

"I tend to go with top shelf, clear liquor myself. It keeps you from being sick in the morning if you stick with it and you don't reek of it for the next two days."

Emmett could only nod, mentally taking notes by the way he moved his lips.

"Jesus," I said as shook my head at dumb and dumber.

I continued to watch the dance floor while the song blended into another one with a similar party beat. Some people went out onto the floor while others came off. It still felt a little _clichéd_, but there may actually be something to the themed business model this place was following. Everybody here was clearly having a ball.

"Whew, I need a drink," Rosalie said as she fanned herself with her hand.

"Already a step ahead of you, Princess." Emmett answered as the bartender placed the three drinks on the bar.

"Please," I thought to myself.

Emmett was anything but smooth, but I guess I couldn't fault him too much. _He_ had his girl. Speaking of, I looked over and Bella was sipping on her drink while she spoke softly with Alice.

_Wonder what that's all about?_

"Everything ok? You having a good time?" I asked once Alice had stopped bending Bella's ear.

"I am. How about you?"

"Nice place, even though the name's a little corny."

"Yeah, I caught that. You have to cut the competition some slack. They can't all be fabulous like Clarity."

I smiled at how she knew exactly what I was thinking. "True, very true."

She leaned over the bar stool next to me instead of sitting in it, which struck me as odd until she started speaking so closely to my ear that I could feel her warm breath caressing my ear lobe. Unlike Emmett, she could come as close to me with her hotness as she wanted to, swimmers ear be damned.

"Howard's was an excellent choice for dinner. Thank you for taking me." She said, stepping back, almost as if she wanted to see my reaction.

It was so out of the blue; it caused me to choke a little on my own drink. Had she picked up on my true intentions? Did she know that I had been attempting to create a sort of casual dating situation?

She pulled her phone out of her small, black suede clutch and looked at me knowingly.

"What?"

"Smile," she said before snapping a quick picture.

_Yeah, she knew… _

"May I?"

She nodded while handing it to me.

I took her phone just as Rosalie poked her head over and wrapped an arm around Bella's shoulder. They both smiled, so I took that as the universal sign for 'take a picture, stupid.' I looked at the screen and the image was breathtaking.

In a bold stroke of inspiration, I programmed my phone number along with the new picture she had taken of me into her list of contacts. I may have also, possibly, forwarded along the snap shot of them to myself. She looked at me with a question covering her gorgeous face until the reality of what I had just done dawned on her.

I smirked because I wasn't done just yet.

I then put her phone to my ear after dialing my own number, letting it ring a few times before hanging up.

"Smile," I said, taking the liberty of snapping a picture of my own of her.

She punched my arm lightly, but I could only shrug in response.

"Hey, it's only fair that I have one, too."

Once I made certain that I had her phone number stored and secured, I handed her phone back to her and attached her name and adorable picture to my brand new, most prized possession.

I leaned into her this time so she could hear me over the thumping music, the heat of her body radiating directly into mine. I resisted the urge to skim the column of her neck with my nose, but it was hard. _Sort of like other things at the moment. _She smelled just like fall, vanilla and lilacs, rich and warm.

"I just figured, since we usually talk through one of the others when we're all making plans or whatever, it makes sense that you have my number…and that I have yours…just in case you need it or need me or need something or…"

Fuck, now I'm rambling.

_Smooth, Edward, you've talked to girls before, remember? Get it together. Besides, she's smiling, so I couldn't have fucked up too bad._

"…look, I'm rambling. I just figure, we're friends by now, right?"

She nodded again, still leaning into me and tucking her thick brown locks behind her ears. She was waiting to hear what else I had to say.

_Ok, here goes…_

"I know it might seem strange, especially since we've all been hanging out for awhile, and let me know if I'm out of order. Look, I'm not trying to pressure you or anything like that, but Bella, I'm really feeling like you and I might…"

"Bells! There you are!"

_Are you fucking kidding me?_

"Come on Bella, we have to dance! This is one of my favorite songs!"

And just like that, the Tiny Terror had come in and swooped on what might have been a huge moment, a leap forward, dragging Bella back out onto the dance floor.

…_Cuz I'm not tryna pressure you_

_Just can't stop thinkin' bout you_

_You ain't even really gotta be my girlfriend._

_I just wanna know your name_

_And maybe sometime_

_We can hook up, hang out, and just chill…_

She was bumping and grinding with Alice on the dance floor while I watched on, helplessly, from a distance.

_Just friends my ass._

What happened next still feels like a blur to me.

One minute, I'm sitting and feeling super satisfied at the progress I had made. Even with Hurricane Alice stepping on my toes, I had taken that first step, well, one of a few first steps really, but I did it and got what I wanted. I got a solid confirmation that maybe we could be more than what we were.

Even while my heartbeat started getting back down to its normal pattern, Bella was making eyes at me, _at me_, as she moved with her hands in the air, down her body, winding them through her hair. She was working that little, tight frame of hers, worry and carefree to the bass line. I could tell that the vultures were still circling, just waiting in the wings, but I couldn't help but wonder if she was doing it all for me. She couldn't possibly know that she already had me.

Still, her eyes never moved away from mine and I was hypnotized. Maybe I could cap this good night off and join her for a dance or two? I usually made it a rule that dancing wasn't my thing, but in this case, I could consider making an exception.

I turned towards Jasper as he came back into the club from having a smoke. He knocked me in the shoulder and ordered another beer. I was gonna tell him to go fuck himself cuz, as it turned out, I wasn't a complete pussy after all.

_Everything was everything. _

The next thing I know, some punk is all up in Bella's face, way too fucking close for my liking. She seemed to know him and he damn sure thought he knew who she was. You could see that she was trying to play it cool, tried not making a scene, but he wouldn't be deterred. She pushed him away, tried dancing around him towards Alice who was hot on his heels, yelling and trying to pull him away from her. He kept putting his scummy hands on _my_ Bella, grabbing at her arms, tugging on her waist.

I immediately saw red.

Before I could react, Rosalie strode past me, cool and calm as you please, pulling her earrings out and tucking them into her handbag as she made her way through the thick crowd. Emmett wasn't too far behind, cracking his knuckles and rolling his neck, loosening his shoulders up.

I shot a look at Jasper. He took a long pull on his fresh beer and we were out of our seats in a flash.

_Shit…_

**What's this now?**

**Reviews are awesome, but I'm just glad if you're still hanging out with me. X's and O's to you all!**

**Playlist is updated. I'm trying to figure out how to post pictures of the gang's outfits. I'll post them on my profile as soon as I do.**


	11. I Don't Wanna

**As per usual…**

Quotes, images, songs, and lyrics belong to their respective writers and/or artists.

Sadly enough, I _don't_ own anything related to Twilight. I _do_ own my original characters and my original story. No copyright infringement is intended.

I do not have a beta, so my apologies in advance. Anyone willing to take on the task, I'd love to chat with you!

Hate it or love it…let me know. Matter of fact, tell a friend! I won't mind!

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter 11 – I Don't Wanna<strong>

_**"If we listened to our intellect, we'd never have a love affair. We'd never have a friendship. We'd never go into business, because we'd be cynical. Well, that's nonsense. You've got to jump off cliffs all the time and build your wings on the way down."**_

_**- Ray Bradbury**_

**BPOV**

"Back the fuck off, Dog Breath!"

Alice was pulling and tugging as hard as her little arms would allow her to, trying to get Emery's drunken ass away from me.

I had done my best to stay civil, to placate him and possibly get him to leave me alone without getting all pissed off and causing a scene. I had seen him when he walked in with his friends, obviously just making a stop as they'd all clearly been drinking for awhile. I whispered to Alice that I hadn't seen him since Angela's party and I didn't want to get into it with him tonight. The six of us had been having such a good time and she seemed to agree, this was neither the time nor the place…until this damn song came on that she _had_ to dance to.

Dragging me out onto the dance floor with her, I had lost sight of my desire to remain incognito. That desire had been replaced by a much stronger, more important one. That was my fault, but fuck it if I didn't have a good damn reason…Edward and I had exchanged numbers! In the grand scheme of things, it really shouldn't have been a huge deal, he had even tried to explain away the importance of it mere moments ago, but I knew. I felt it. I knew that I was supposed to be more vigilant in watching for signs, but I'd have to be deaf, dumb, _and_ unconscious to miss that one. His bashful way of making the transaction was the cutest thing I had ever seen – second to only kittens and puppies. Not even babies were that cute.

_Not all of them anyway._

Even when Alice and I started to dance, I couldn't take my eyes off of him. The feeling was mutual for sure because I could feel his gaze caressing every curve, nook and cranny of my body. He was brimming with the same excitement and wonder that I felt inside, screaming and trying to make its way out of me. If I could've run up and flopped down on his lap while he sat on that bar stool, I would've. Hell, I probably should've.

_But, as they say, you wait long, you wait wrong._

I was still entertaining the idea when I tried to be sexy and dipped low to the floor. I had seen Rose do it a million times and the guys would usually fall to her feet. The way his eyes slightly bugged out told me it was doing the trick. Having his attention like that was _intoxicating_. He didn't try to pretend or act like he didn't see me. He was watching me and he liked it. I liked it. We were in sync. It was like the best kind of high.

But, as I made my way back up, I felt an arm snake its way around me and it couldn't have been the same arm that I wanted it to be.

"Hey baby, you look soooooo good tonight. That dress is the shit. Come here," he slurred as he pressed his face painfully into my neck.

_Surprise_ would have been an understatement.

_Disgust_ would have been another.

"Embry, what the hell are you doing here?" I asked, as pleasantly as I could.

"Oh, you know, just club hopping with my peeps. Glad I ran into you, though. Why haven't you called?"

He tried wrapping his other arm around me, sending a wave of Mad Dog 20/20 over me.

_Yep. Drunk as a skunk._

"Embry, hun, you know why I haven't called," I lightly pushed against his chest to get some breathing room between us. "I haven't called for the same reasons you haven't called me."

He laughed. _Fucking_ laughed at me.

"Aww, baby. You still mad about that? You know you're the only one for me. You'll always be my girl, even if you are a fucking cock tease half the time."

I laughed in spite of the fucked up situation that I now found myself in.

_Have I ever been the only one for him? Let's see, there was Emily. Then there was Chelsea. We can't forget about that Maria bitch…_

As I thought back on how many times I hadn't gotten mad at him, but went running back just to prove that I wasn't strange, just to show that I could keep a boyfriend, just to have him refer to me as his, the shit didn't seem quite as funny anymore…

"The only one for you, Embry? Hardly."

I pushed him a little harder.

"Don't be like that, Bells. Come on, I've been miserable without you. I know you've been miserable without me. Stop playing fucking games."

I tried dancing around him, but he was too comfortable and I knew he would never see reason enough to let me go on my way, not like this. If I wanted to get through his drunken haze, I would have to be gentle, but firm.

"Embry, stop. We aren't together anymore and we won't ever be again."

_Of course that went over like gangbusters._

"Bella, why are you fucking talking to me like that? Come over here and stop being such a teasing little bitch. You know you want me. You need me. Tell me you missed me," he said, much more forcefully than before as he pulled me impossibly closer.

"Will you quit it with this hard to get bull shit? You are mine, Bella, no matter what you think, no matter how many girls I fuck around with, you will always be mine."

I'm still not sure if he really said that shit, or if my mind was playing tricks on me, but my subconscious took me backwards, right into the middle of a scene that was very similar to this one. Only Embry wasn't the one holding onto me that time, though he claimed to own me all the same.

_Riley…_

Horror and embarrassment flooded my senses and I froze up, just like I did that night that felt like eons ago. He was right. There was a time not too long ago that I did need him. I felt myself choking up on how pathetic I had become without even realizing it. The fight in me was being drawn out, even while I tried backing away. That only made him hold onto me tighter.

Gone was the slurring, confused, drunken college kid.

_This was the Embry that I knew._

I felt a hard yank from the other direction. Once I stumbled out of Embry's grasp, I twirled around to find Rose pinning her hair up into a neat twist on top of her head. Where she'd hidden the bobbie pins, I was sure I'd never know.

"Alright, asshole. I've told you this once before, but let me try it again. You fuck with my best friend, you fuck with me. And I'm not the type of bitch that you fuck with without regretting it for a very long time."

Her tone was low and menacing. I was surprised that we could hear her, but she was as clear as a bell.

"If there's anything else that you'd like to say to Bella, I suggest you spit it out now before I fuck that pretty mouth of yours up so bad that all you'll be able to spit out are your teeth."

Embry could only stare at us with his mouth hanging open until a deep laugh from the pit of his belly rumbled out of him.

"Are you for real? You're gonna kick my ass? I know you're a big bitch, but come on."

Her eyes were fire as she started stepping out of her Christian Leboutin heels. At the same time, Embry's friends Sam, Quil and Paul wandered up, flanking him and joining in his mirth as he tried pulling himself together from his heavy bout of laughter.

"I'm a joke now? You just try me and see, Fucker. I'll take on all of you dick heads, no problem."

He should have been used to Rose by now; she made no bones about the fact that ass kicking was her specialty. Embry knew from jump that she hated his guts just as much as he hated hers. My nerves were getting the best of me, making me nauseous, because she would actually try and fight all of these guys at the same time.

The laughter died down quickly and was replaced with a cautious wariness. Embry's expression changed from one of glee to one of apprehension. His friends followed suit.

When I turned around, I saw what had them shitting their pants.

Not only was Rose just a few steps away from beating Embry down, but Emmett, Edward and Jasper were standing behind us, just waiting for one of them to do or say something stupid.

_Not more of this damsel in distress bull shit…_

Jasper came over and helped Alice off of the ground. She was still tugging at Embry's shirt, bless her heart.

The menace that was etched on Emmett's face even had me a little scared. He looked away from Embry and his crew just long enough to look at me.

"Bells, I want you to know that the only reason we haven't beat the shit outta these creeps already is because there would be nothing hotter right now than seeing Rose kick your boy here in the dick."

Rosie turned and blew a kiss at the big bear.

"That's cute and all, but that really won't be necessary. If she were to break a nail on him, we'd have to let her kill him."

We all turned towards the scariest, hottest, most commanding voice of them all. Edward spoke up out of nowhere, surprising the hell out of me. He strode between all of us, sure and strong, picking Embry up as if he weighed nothing. His friends tried to jump to his defense, but Jasper, Emmett and Rose were right on their tails.

Edward spoke low into Embry's ear. We couldn't hear him, but I could imagine the pain that he must've promised him both by the look on Embry's face and the tightening of the veins in Edward's neck. He pushed him up against the wall by his throat, damn near suspending him in the air. When he finished, he threw him towards me.

"Now, I don't know who the fuck you are and I really don't give a shit. First, you need to apologize to the lady. Then you need to take a good, long look at her because you won't be seeing her again if I have anything to do with it."

Before he could utter a word, security descended on us. They gathered from the crowd that Embry was the offender in the situation and he was promptly ushered out of the club along with his drinking buddies. I looked down at my hands and I was still shaking from it all.

"Hey, hey, are you alright?"

I looked up and was met with Edward's mossy green eyes and I just lost it. I lost myself in what I had been dealing with since I had allowed Riley to break me so long ago. The violent spasms that rocked me came as I realized that I couldn't blame him or Embry for any of this. Not anymore. It was on me to face it, to handle it and I didn't. I tried to avoid it all, tried wishing it all away. I tried closing myself off and that hadn't worked either.

I felt the tears land on my cheeks of their own accord as I clung to his chest; I for damn sure hadn't allowed them to fall. I had been reduced to finding comfort with assholes like Embry that thought they owned me and I let them lead me to believe that, in the end; I didn't deserve the fairytale and I would never have it.

The man that didn't shy away from my emotion, the man that was letting me get a small portion of my frustration out, the one that had absolutely nothing to do with my bull shit told me something completely different as he wound his arms around me, tight and secure.

"Can we just get out of here?" I asked, allowing my vulnerability to show through.

_I was already snotting and wiping my nose on his shirt. May as well look like a needy bitch, too. I already felt like one._

"Sure, sweetheart, whatever you need."

I hoped he was for real, hoped upon hope that he wasn't playing a game…not like all the others. I knew for sure that I wouldn't be able to take it if he was.

xx_C_xx

The apartment was dark when I opened the door. Edward held my hand up until I tried to unlock it. He picked up the keys when I dropped them like a dork, opening it flawlessly when my own shaking hands wouldn't. Or couldn't.

"There's beer or whatever you'd like in the fridge." I said as I made my way to my bedroom.

I didn't want to be rude, but I had to take a few moments to pull my shit together.

I pulled off the hooker boots and tugged the dress over my head. Pulling my hair into a ponytail, I jumped into the hot shower quickly, rinsing the smell and memory of Embry's hands from my body. On the outside, I was sure I looked like a basket case. I hadn't stopped shaking since I first noticed who had put their arm around me on that dance floor. It wasn't that I was afraid of Embry. He had never hit me or abused me physically. I was more upset by the fact that he knew what buttons to push. He immediately went for the jugular, talking about how I needed him and that I was his. Using my apprehension for intimacy against me.

I remember yearning to hear those words. I also remember when needing somebody in your life wasn't a bad thing. When did it become something to be ashamed of? I'm not sure when, but somehow, it had and I was. I should have been petrified about my future coming face to face with my past like it did, but that wasn't it, either. I hadn't done anything wrong by Embry. _He_ was the one that had gone around the campus, the world for all I knew, fucking anything that smelled good and smiled at him. When we first started dating, he thought I was frigid because I hadn't jumped into bed with him right away.

_No, I was still hurting._

Hell, I am still hurting, but I would never apologize for wanting to take things slow, especially on a physical level. That doesn't make me a tease; that makes me smart. If I had held out a little longer with Embry, I could have saved myself a whole lot of hurt.

The worst that he could have done to me was tell Edward that. He could have mentioned my flaws, how my self esteem wasn't the greatest, that chocolate needed to be in the immediate vicinity whenever I started my period and that I could be clingy sometimes. I could never fault him for driving away somebody that probably didn't want anything to do with me by telling him the truth. The most fucked up part about it all was that Edward probably already knew all of that shit. He and I had spent more time together than Embry and I ever did. He knew me better than any of the guys I've dated, especially Riley.

_Riley…_

Riley was the horcrux. My kryptonite. He was the source of all of my drama. If I had handled that better, gotten over it when I should have, so many things would probably be different. For instance, I probably wouldn't be in this bathroom talking to myself when the object of my affection is sitting in my living room, worried and waiting for me.

_Me!_

_Ok Bella, get it together or leave it alone._

I couldn't change the past; I knew that much, but the question still remained.

_What do I do about my future?_

I put on a pair of sweats, two pairs of thick, fuzzy socks and zipped up my hoodie. I grabbed three blankets from the linen closet as I passed it.

Edward was sitting on the couch, still in the dark. The light from the hall illuminated his features as he sipped from his beer bottle. When he heard me approach, he looked up and handed me the other one that he had opened.

"Thanks," I whispered, avoiding his eyes.

"You wanna talk about it?" He asked, worry lacing his soft voice.

"Sure, I was sorta hoping we could. Come with me?"

"Anywhere."

_He didn't even have to think about it._

I grabbed a few more beers as well as the bottle opener and my keys off the breakfast bar. Slipping the opener into my pocket, I tugged at his hand. He looked at me in question, but followed all the same.

Leading him into the hallway, he took the blankets and the beers out of my arms. We went up the stairwell at the end of the hall that led up to the roof. Our building was only four flights, but the spot that I liked to call my own on that rooftop was always a good place to clear my head. I usually reserved it for my alone time, but, sharing it with Edward felt right tonight.

I had an old folding lawn chair tucked away that I had swiped from Charlie's, but I bypassed it, opting for the ground instead. I would have pulled that bitch out in a heartbeat if I thought he'd go for me sitting in his lap.

_A girl can dream._

Taking a blanket from him, I spread it out and sat down Indian style. He looked at me for a long minute, tilting his head and chuckling before he joined me.

"I hope this is ok," I said, unsure of his reaction or how comfortable he was being here with me like this.

"It's more than ok, Bella."

I smiled while he handed me the other blanket. He wrapped his around his shoulders and I did the same, bracing ourselves against the breeze being kicked up by the city below us. The silence that followed was a little uncomfortable, but not too bad. It was the first time we were truly alone, so it was to be expected.

I wrapped my arms around my knees out of habit.

He broke the ice.

"So, did you enjoy yourself before that last bit at the end?" He asked.

I snorted, thinking back on how awesome the night had been before Embry showed up to ruin it all.

"I did. It's always a good time when I'm with you guys."

A few more moments passed.

"So, Embry? Was that his name?"

_Cut to the frickin chase why don't ya?_

I exhaled deeply, preparing myself for memory lane.

"Yeah, that was Embry…my ex. It didn't end well between us, but I guess that's obvious."

He laughed.

"Oh, I don't know. I didn't see any drinks flying past your head."

I thought back to _Boob Implants Barbie._

"Hmm. Touché."

We sniggered lightly together. I had forgotten all about Barbie Girl and her drama.

"I'm really sorry for all of that, by the way."

"What in the world would you have to be sorry for?"

"I can think of a few things, but generally, I'm sorry for the fact that the douche bag that I used to date had to come and destroy the good night that we were having."

I looked over at him and he was leaning back on his hands, eyes dancing at me.

_Maybe I was making an assumption? Maybe Embry showing up hadn't messed up anything?_

"Well, I don't want to assume, so I'll rephrase that. The good night that _I _was having."

He took a single finger and brushed a stray hair from my ponytail behind my ear, lingering for a split second along my cheek.

"That's not necessary. I think it's safe to say that we were both having a _very_ good time."

I'm sure my blush was off the meter.

"Were we?"

He lifted my chin with that same hand.

"Yes, we definitely were."

_Danger, Will Robinson. Danger!_

"Hmm." I looked away, suddenly craving the beer that we had brought up with us.

"Really though, thank you for stepping in. Embry was never good with handling his anger."

"Bella, you don't ever need to thank me for that. None of us really. We should've just let Rosalie beat the shit out of him, though."

"Yeah, she makes ass handing an art form. Always has."

"Trust me; I've seen her with unruly customers. I know better than to get on that girls bad side."

"And knowing is half the battle."

We clinked the necks of our bottles in toast.

_Rosie was bad ass. Period._

"I'm not sure if you feel up to getting into it, but what happened between you two? He seems to feel like he still has a claim on you."

I choked a little, but not enough to keep me from responding. If I didn't know any better, he almost sounded concerned.

"He knows better than that. We haven't talked in weeks. Months really by now. It's a long story, so how about the abbreviated version?"

"My ears are all yours, Ms. Swan."

"I have one condition, though."

"You usually do."

"I want the cliff notes on Malibu Barbie."

It was his turn to choke a little.

"Who?"

"Tanya."

"Oh, yeah. Alright, we can do that. Did you want to pitch a tent first while we're up here? Maybe start a fire and make some smores?"

I looked around at our surroundings.

"You don't think we'd already be doing that if we had marshmallows downstairs?"

"You really want to hear about her?"

"Only if you really want to hear about Embry."

"I don't, not really, but I want to know about it because it's had an impact on you."

"Really? I thought you were just being nosey."

"I _am_ nosey…when it comes to you. I want to know it all. Judging by today and how I almost had to knock his teeth out, that needs to start with Embry."

My tonsils were playing volleyball with two words: why and me.

_Why would he be nosey when it came to me?_

I stared at him, long and hard. He was serious and he was waiting.

"Let me start by saying I am not hurting over him in any way, shape or form."

He nodded.

I took a deep, cleansing breathe.

"Rosie thinks I'm crazy, but she also thought I was crazy for giving him the time of day in the first place. She was right, of course, but I'd never tell her that. Anyway, Embry was my first try at a normal relationship after another relationship. At first, things were great and I thought he was really into me. I wanted to be really into him, I wanted to be normal, you know? But, I guess when you get comfortable and you start to see the crust of a motherfucker, that honeymoon phase dries up really fucking quickly."

His eyes got big as he watched my mouth moving at warp speed, but I was on a roll.

"After the first couple weeks, his true colors started shining through. We didn't spend any time together after we had pretty much been inseparable. I had to beat him off with a stick in the beginning, but he had worn me down. He stopped answering my phone calls, stopped responding to my text messages. He'd always have a good reason when we did hook up, but then all of those lies that were told to cover up the first set of lies started to crumble. You put those lies with the other lies and, well…you get the picture. First there was Maria. When I found out about her, I completely lost my shit. That's what a good girlfriend is supposed to do when she finds out that her good boyfriend ain't really all that good, right?"

He nodded, showing me that he was still following.

"Mind you, I had gone into the whole thing with the knowledge that I had to be ready, even a little closed off because you give people the potential to fuck you up pretty bad when you open yourself up, you know what I mean? So when I found out about him fucking around with Chelsea, I was numb. I expected it. We went through the motions. He said I was frigid. I detached myself even more. When we got to Angela's party at the start of last quarter, I went ape shit, but that was really only because I was embarrassed and he was fucking that girl Emily up against a god damned wall!"

By the time I took another breathe, I was spent. I sprawled out across the blanket, exhausted from going back through all of that nonsense in sixty seconds flat. Alice would have been so proud.

"You probably think I'm a flaming nut job."

Edward crawled down beside me, stretching his long legs out and resting his head on his arms. His face was so close to mine, I could feel and smell his warm breath washing over me. He was all cinnamon and beer and yummy.

"No, I think he's a flaming douche. But tell me about the relationship before him."

I could feel the relief of being finished being replaced by lead in my gut, dropping all the way to the tips of my toes.

"Why do you wanna know about that?"

"I don't know. Just humor me."

I twisted my arms over my eyes, wishing I could click my heels and be anywhere else but here, right at this moment. If he didn't think I was a lunatic after that rant about Embry, the tragic tale of Riley would surely change his mind.

"What if I said I didn't want to?"

I felt a light tugging on my arms. I moved them off of my face and turned to face him fully.

"Bella, I would never ask you to do something that you didn't want to do. I hope you believe that and trust me when I say it. We're friends and you can tell me anything."

_Friends…_

"Besides, I think it would help." He added.

I knew at that moment that I didn't want to be his friend. I wanted to push him over onto his back and trade in these crappy memories for new ones. But, that wasn't going to solve anything.

"I was a freshman. He was a senior. I was in love. He wasn't. It's simple."

"Bella."

_Shit…_

When I say that I really didn't want to get into this with _him_ right _now_, I mean that shit with my whole heart. With all of my soul. This could be the moment when he feels like he should just wash his hands of my broken, fucked up ass and be done. And that would be such a shame. I had the sneaking suspicion that, if I could just get over my trust issues and my hang ups, Edward and I might be something.

_Borrowing a page out of Alice's storybook, we could be something magical. _

I could walk the plank, take a long walk off of a short pier, or I could jump in with both grace and determination.

He watched me as I battled with myself. I found it hard to believe, as I watched him watching me, that he didn't realize how magnificent he truly was. The fact that he was right here with me, right _now_, giving me the opportunity to not only purge what ailed me tonight, but urged me to get to the heart of the matter, something that had been plaguing my entire being, spoke volumes to me.

_What guy volunteered to clean up another dude's mess like that?_

It was then that I decided that if I were to ever come to a point where I could trust him enough to see where this could go without all of this heavy ass carry-on luggage, now was that time.

"Just so you know, this is the long, sad story of a naïve girl."

He opened a fresh beer and handed me one as well, nodding his head, cheering me on as I told him a story that I had never shared with anyone in its entirety.

"His name was Riley. I met him during my very first quarter of my freshman year…Do you really want to hear all of this?"

"Bella, dear, you're stalling."

_Damn it._

"I had a work study job on campus that year; Charlie wasn't the Chief just yet, so I qualified for the financial aid. It was a desk job, so I had time where I could do homework or read or whatever I needed to do. He was older and had a lot of girls stopping by on their way to and from class to see him or talk to him or whatever, but I kept my nose buried in a book of some sort. I hadn't had many boyfriends back home. I was actually still a virgin, so I was naïve to the tenth power when it came to guys, but he was persistent in getting me to notice him."

The look on Edward's face was priceless, but instead of making a smart comment about my chastity, I went on.

"It was wonderful. His family had money, so he made me quit my job. I wasn't that girl, I knew I had to work to make my way in life, but he convinced me that I didn't have to work because I was his and I allowed myself to believe him. He would drive me to class if we didn't walk together. We studied together. We went to his frat parties together. Everybody knew I was his and he made me feel like a princess…most of the time. I felt like a big fish in a big pond. Riley had made his claim on me apparent and I was just fine with that. Sure, he had a temper and would wig out on me every now and then, especially at parties if I talked to one of his frat brothers too long or if I wasn't with him and didn't call to check in or something, but I thought that came along with the territory. I had only met Alice a few weeks before that, so she was tickled for me, but Rose was always asking me how I was and if I was happy. I didn't understand it at the time. I had even entertained the idea that she may have been jealous, but that bubble didn't get too high up in the air before it fell to the ground, hard and fast."

He looked confused, so I clarified.

"See, Rose was pledging a sorority, so while I was walking around in the bliss of what I thought was a real relationship; she got to hear all of the lowdown of high society and sorority life. Many a big sister had been with Riley, many a little sister, too, but I didn't let that bother me. Even after Rose told me all about it, I stayed with him because he wanted me and convinced me that my world was nothing without him, just like his was nothing without me. I wanted that. I wanted it so, so badly. I had even stopped getting upset with him when it came to the other girls. He made me believe that I was the only one that mattered. We went to a party one night and he completely lost it when I danced with a guy he didn't like. I had never seen him that angry. He walked right up to us and started shaking me and yelling 'You're mine, Bella. No matter what you think, no matter how many girls I fuck around with, you will always be mine.' I should have punched him, but I felt so bad for upsetting him, we left the party and went back to his apartment and…that was the night I lost my virginity."

"Oh, Bella." Edward said.

"Turns out, I was never more than something to do, just a notch on his bedpost once he finally got in my pants. I guess it was a guys' mantra that you had to put in work to add a virgin to your list or something? Anyway, aside from the time he spent on extra-curriculars around campus, he had a girlfriend back home the entire time. Put that with the fact that he had also been accepted into a prestigious law school back home, he had a full life without me just waiting for him."

We sat in silence for a moment, but the quiet was starting to bug me.

"I found all of this out at Rose's Spring Social after she had finished her pledge process, about a week or so after that party. Alice actually helped me find a dress and everything for that night; we were both so proud of Rose. Riley called and said he would meet me there instead of picking me up like we had planned, but I didn't really think anything of it. I guess he thought I just wouldn't go. Alice had a final to study for, so I went by myself. Once I got there, I had the chance to meet Riley's girlfriend from home, face to face. She came down since she had been a member of the sorority and the day before, her sisters had a shower for her because she happened to be seven months pregnant."

He listened as I summed it all up, his hand covering his mouth.

"Not only was I a laughing stock, but the life that I had planned out for us was flushed down the toilet before I had ever even dreamed it up. I knew he would apply to law school and would get in, but I assumed he would stay with me and go to Northwestern. That was never his plan. The fairytale had never included me and his life was moving along. Not for one minute did I ever have a place in it."

He slid closer to me, wrapping an arm around me.

"Long story short, I trusted him. He promised me the world, even when all I ever wanted or asked for was some happiness. After Riley, I promised myself that I would never make that mistake again. Actions always speak louder. I'd fucked around with guys here and there after that, but I keep myself detached, I never let myself get too wrapped up in any of it. Embry was my first go at a real relationship and it just ended up being a similar kind of disaster."

We sat like that for a while, him with his arm around me, looking out at the cars passing by on the city streets below us. The only sound between us was the sound of the wind howling around us. After I had laid everything out, there really wasn't anything else that could be said.

_And now he knows, so let's get on with it already._

I waited, and waited some more for him to tell me I was looney tunes and he couldn't see anything more between us than friendship. I couldn't blame him if he did. But it was the waiting. The waiting was driving me nuts.

When he finally spoke again, I couldn't believe what he had to say.

"Sweetheart, that's just because you believed the lie. It doesn't always have to be like that. You deserve so much better."

I shook my head as I chased away the tears.

"Bella, do you know how strong you are? You have been through the ringer and you are still a shining, beautiful supernova of a star. Do you know what you get when you put coal through that type of stress and strain? You get a diamond. You get a pearl when you agitate a clam. I have no doubt that you are better off without the Riley's and the Embry's of the world. You think you're closed off, and you'd have every right to be, but you're not. Bella, you are a woman that knows who she is and what she's all about now. Period. Don't ever let anybody tell you that you don't. You've allowed yourself to be vulnerable and you've been burned because of it. That's unfortunate, but now? Now the ball is in your court. Do you let that continue to drag you down into the abyss of self loathing? Do you let it continue to agitate you or do you rise above it all and show the world what a gorgeous, priceless pearl that you have inside of you? I think you already know. You've already chosen."

He wrapped both arms around me and I let him, burying my face in his chest, finally able to exhale. He didn't say anything else and I didn't either.

I never got the chance to tell him that I believed him. I never took the opportunity to let him know that his words meant the world to me. I hadn't even had a chance to thank him before we dozed off on that blanket on the rooftop of my little building, surrounded by empty beer bottles and wrapped up tight in the secure comfort that we gave to one another against the blustery Chicago wind.

**EPOV**

Saturday went by without incident. I stayed in the house, did some laundry, and sifted through my thoughts on the last couple of days. Actually, the last couple of nights if we were being specific. I didn't field any phone calls, just a few text messages here and there.

I couldn't believe the story that Bella had told me the other night after we left the club. She was so upset, so shaken; I knew I couldn't leave her. I really didn't want to. I could tell that she didn't want to talk about it, but once the floodgates had been opened, she couldn't stop. That alone gave me hope. If she could trust me enough with the details of her darkest moment, then maybe, just maybe, she'd be able to one day trust me with her heart.

Rosalie came home in the wee hours of the morning to find me wrapped around Bella and buried under the blankets we had as we spooned on their rooftop. I wasn't really embarrassed for her to find us like that, it was all innocent enough, but damn it if she wouldn't stop telling me how cute we looked.

Rosalie promised me that she would wake her and get her into bed, so I kissed her on the forehead and made my way back uptown.

That brought me to Sunday morning, bright and early, sitting at Martha's for brunch with Alice.

"You promise that you would tell me if she wasn't fine, though, right?"

"Edward, I told you, she was like a new woman when I saw her yesterday. What are you so worried about?"

"I don't know. We had a pretty intense conversation after I got her home and I haven't talked to her since. I just want to be sure that I didn't say too much or make her uncomfortable."

We had sent a text or two on Saturday, I wanted to check on her after the emotional rollercoaster of the night before. She said she was fine and thanked me, but I wanted to be certain. I knew she was the type of person that would try and hide it if she thought she was being a burden.

"Whatever you said to her did the trick. She laughed off the whole Embry situation like it was nothing. And believe me, I've seen her when she's really fine and when she's only pretending to be. Even Rose agrees. She's good, Edward."

I left it at that, not seeing the point of bringing up the Riley part of the story. I sipped on my coffee while we waited on our food.

"So, Jazz and I were talking and we both want to ask you something."

I smirked over my coffee cup.

"Oh really? Ok. Shoot."

"What do you think about us hosting a Halloween party at Clarity?"

_Rats._

"Alice, that's next week. That doesn't give us a lot of time to plan."

"I know, but Halloween is on a Saturday this year. We'll decorate, the staff can wear costumes, and we'll have a big costume contest for the patrons, give out little party favors, have autumn and harvest themed dishes in the restaurant. It'll be a blast and a great way to keep our name buzzing."

I thought it over quickly, but it was really a no brainer.

"I'm all in if you and Jasper don't mind the fact that you'll be busting your asses on advertising and marketing this week."

She pulled her Blackberry out and started typing.

"I'm already half way there, Brother dear."

xx_C_xx

"Come on, Alice, I don't want to wear make-up."

"Puh - leazze?"

"No. Hell no."

"Come on, Emmett. You just need a little bit. Jack Sparrow wears make up."

"You say that like it's an incentive or something. That makes me pretty fucking sure that I _don't_ want to wear it."

"I thought you liked him?"

"Of course, I do, who doesn't? But that's why I didn't let you put me in an outfit like his. I wanna be gritty and grimy. I wanna be one of them bad motherfuckers that sweeps barnacles off the deck and shit."

"Geez, fine Emmett, go on," Alice groaned as she waved him away from where she was seated at the vanity.

Jazz and I laughed as he got up from the seat and pulled the wedgie that his red and black striped pantaloons or whatever the fuck they were called had created.

"Fuck the both of you. Especially you, Jasper. I can see your whole package in those white pants."

I looked at myself again in the mirror. Alice had put me together quite nicely and neither one of those fuckers could say shit about it.

_I only hoped I could live up to the image._

"I must say, Jazz. Them are the tightest, most penis-compressingest, sperm-killingest, testicle-grippingest, nut huggenest pants I ever did see," Rosalie commented in the most awful imitation of a southern accent I'd ever heard.

Still, it was one of the funniest things I had heard in a long time.

Alice had called us into the foyer of the room to make sure we had all dressed to her specifications. She did her little inspection while Rosalie and Bella finished dressing. We were all still falling over ourselves with laughter by the time the door to the locker and dressing area of the women's room had opened and Bella stepped out of it.

I had to wonder if she had put on the whole outfit or if she had accidentally left some of it behind.

If you looked over each of the girls, it was easy to figure out that crinoline was a theme they had all agreed upon even though the outfits they had selected were very different.

Alice was a female sailor. She was an all American: Stars and stripes, pristine white and navy blue all the way. I hadn't quite decided if she was allowed to walk around in that short skirt with anchors and shit on it or not. She _was_ my damn sister. To make matters worse, her top was a bustier thing with long sleeves attached, like they would make the situation any better. I had to give her credit, though. The navy and white peep toes were a nice touch.

I could only assume that Jasper was supposed to be her 'first mate' of sorts in his matching sailors' suit. He was fairly standard in his all white outfit, lined in navy. I think I also detected some flair in the bottom of those pants legs. Even I had to admit that they were adorable together, right down to their matching hats. I chuckled to myself as I wondered if she had gotten white pants to fit his junk like that on purpose. Not much of what she did was ever on accident.

_Morons._

Then we had Rosalie and Emmett. He was a brawny, cut throat pirate, complete with fake scruff and dirt on his face. That and a little eyeliner was the only make-up that he let Alice put on him.

His long sleeved white shirt was ripped and the black vest he wore over it tied the outfit together with his shorn red and black striped pantaloons. The sash of the red bandana that was tied around his head hung low across his shoulders, almost down to the black boots he wore.

Rosalie came from the dressing area as his proud pirate wench in her lacy black bustier, matching crinoline skirt and black stilettos. The whole thing was lined in gold and red. The big frilly hat that she had on is what set it off, though. It was dripping in lace and red bows. Somehow, she had it cocked sideways like a gangster.

_Idiots._

Their whole water theme was cute, but the outfit that Alice handed me didn't match at all. I was supposed to be your average, every day, run of the mill prince charming. I didn't see how that had anything to do with water, but I had to admit, I was pretty damn suave looking.

The outfit was pretty spiffy. It had a white military style jacket, brown slacks with gold running down the sides and a golden sash across my chest. I even had a medal of honor. I was used to rolling solo, so I wasn't too bent out of shape about it.

_At least Alice had me looking right…_

Once our laughter had died down over Jasper and his 'britches', I stopped wondering about themes, water and any other unnecessary bull shit as soon as Bella emerged.

_Pure. Fucking. Genius. That's what my sister was._

She had forgone the damn bustier. A bra must've been good enough for her because that's all she had on: A bright, royal blue bra lined in yellow with red, puffy capped sleeves attached and an even brighter yellow skirt with layers of white crinoline showing underneath without shame or remorse.

_That's how short the skirt was._

Cute little white gloves and a red bow in her long, curly hair completed the package. Primary colors of everything. She was live and in Technicolor, all set and ready to make this party, a few hours of watching her work like that, one of the most painful experiences of my life.

_Just friends._

_Fucking hell._

Once I let my eyes travel all the way down to her royal blue heels and back up again, stopping somewhere around the flat plane of her stomach and the dip of her luxurious belly button, the magnitude of the situation hit me like a fucking freight train.

Bella was fucking Snow White and I was…I was to be her Prince Charming.

* * *

><p><strong>X's and O's to you all!<strong>

**Playlist is updated. Costumes are linked, too.**


	12. So Into You

**As per usual…**

Quotes, images, songs, and lyrics belong to their respective writers and/or artists.

Sadly enough, I _don't_ own anything related to Twilight. I _do_ own my original characters and my original story. No copyright infringement is intended.

I do not have a beta, so my apologies in advance. Anyone willing to take on the task, I'd love to chat with you!

Hate it or love it…let me know. Matter of fact, tell a friend! I won't mind!

**Lots of references made in the next two chapters, peeps. Two great songs inspired this chapter. Check 'em out on the playlist or on youtube.**

**Think of this as part one. Part two will be up tomorrow…**

**Chapter 12 – So Into You / We Could Be**

**Progress always involves risks. You can't steal second base and keep your foot on first.**

– **Frederick B. Wilcox**

**BPOV**

It might be a stretch, but I think Edward liked my costume.

When Alice handed it to me, I had to ask her where the rest of it was.

She just laughed at me as she walked out on us, stopping short before she made her way out the door with her cell phone pressed up to her ear.

"Don't walk out of here without putting that bow in your hair." She warned. "No Jazz, not you. Will you grab Em and Edward and meet me in the ladies dressing room?"

Rose took the hanger out of my hands and gave it a once over. "Nice."

"Nice? That's all you have to say is nice?"

"What do you want me to say? It is nice. I'll be naked, too."

"At least you'll be covered. I can't walk around here serving food in a bikini!"

She thought about it while she slipped on her black knee boots.

"Umm…I think you actually can. They do it at Hooter's every day. Strip clubs too." She said with a wink, sliding on her own short skirt over her black boy shorts. Alice made sure to pick up a matching pair for each of our costumes.

"Who are you supposed to be anyway?"

"Nobody specific. I'm just a hot ass, generic pirate by the look of things."

She turned so I could lace up the back of her corset.

"There you go. Can you help me with mine?" I asked.

I had gotten my boy shorts and my shoes on with no problem, but the rest of this fucking thing had bows and twist ties all over the place. The bra and the skirt both tied in the back which was not gonna fly if I had any unruly or frisky customers.

With my luck, we'd have a house full of jackasses tonight. We'd have to pin it or something. Nip this thing in the bud.

"This cape is adorable, Bella." Rose said as she finished what I hoped was the last of the bows.

"Hmm. I was wondering about that. It's kinda short for me to be a super hero or anything like that, right?"

The bright colors brought comic books to mind, but I was clueless which one it would be until I turned around to put on the final touch, the headband with the big ass red bow on it. Alice had made it a point to threaten me about it, so I wanted to be sure I had it on.

"Holy shit."

That was all I could come up with when I saw my reflection.

"Wow. I didn't know Snow White was a porn star in her free time. Fucking A!" Rose said.

"Yeah, well, I didn't know Captain Hook allowed pimps on his boat, either. Nice hat."

She laughed, but still gave me the finger as she walked out, leaving me to fend for myself now that I was fully strapped into my costume.

_Alice…_

I leaned against the sink as I thought of our last few conversations.

_Damn it._

Alice could be a sneaky little bastard when she wanted to be. Something generic like an unnamed pirate or sailor just wouldn't get her point across, would it? I knew she was thorough, but geez…

_Snow White. Of all things…_

I immediately thought back to last week. Our night on the rooftop…

xx_C_xx

I woke up that Saturday morning, in my bed, refreshed. I should have been drained from the night before, upset, maybe even a little down, but I wasn't.

I don't remember Edward leaving, but you could tell that the sunrise wasn't far behind when Rose shook me awake. We must've fallen asleep after our talk. Once I got my bearings, she helped me gather up the blankets, Edward had apparently cleaned up the beer bottles before he left, and we went back down to the apartment.

"You guys were up there for quite awhile, I just got home about ten minutes ago. You sure there's nothing you want to tell me?"

Rose thought she was a bull dog, and she was when it came to sniffing out newsworthy gossip, but the time I spent with Edward the night before didn't feel like gossip worthy fodder. It felt like something special. I wasn't going to tarnish that for anything.

"Rose, I love you, but there's nothing to tell. We took some beer up to the rooftop and we talked about everything that happened last night. We just fell asleep. Don't you think you'd be able to tell if we had had sex or not?"

She looked at me for a long minute.

"No, I suppose you're right. You don't have that glow that I would imagine would come along with sleeping with Edward after the drought you've had."

She quickly covered her mouth, clearly having let out more of her thoughts than she meant to.

"I'm sorry Bella. That was insensitive after everything that's happened."

I could've been mad at her, but what would've been the point of that? Embry and I hadn't been together for a while before the break up, so she knew I wasn't getting any. Having been as close to Edward as I was last night, it was obvious that he was packing. I tried not to notice, but fuck it, I'm human. A girl would have to be blind to not have noticed.

"You're fine, Rose. It's been awhile, so I'm sure I'd be a glow worm if anything had happened last night, but it didn't. I promise."

She nodded while we started folding up the blankets. I took the one that we had both laid on last night and put it to the side. I wanted to take it back to my room with me just the way it was. Call me sentimental…whatever.

"Do you think he's a good guy?" Rose asked.

I thought about it for a moment.

"Yes, I really think I do."

She agreed and we finished folding and generally cleaning up in silence. I knew she worried about me, but we understood certain things about one another having been friends since preschool. She might tease me unmercifully, but she knew I wouldn't talk about something until I had analyzed it, taken it apart and put it all back together again.

After that, I went on to bed only to be jostled out of my sleep a few short hours later.

I blinked hard twice and saw Alice's pixie form come into view. I glanced over at the clock.

"Geez…don't you have a home?"

"Yes, I do, but I was worried about you. How are you?"

"I'm good. How are you?"

"I'm fine, but you're the one that was put through the ringer last night. Did Embry try to call you or anything?"

I picked up my cell phone from my night stand.

One new message, but that was from Edward's number. His adorable smirk from last night at the club looked right at me.

"_**Good morning, Beautiful. Are you ok?" – EC**_

_How sweet is he?_

"_**Beautiful? Did you mean to send that to me or were you meaning to check up on Rose?" – BS**_

_That boy could be a charmer when he wanted to be._

I smiled to myself.

"Nope, not a word. I doubt that I'll hear from him, though, especially not after he's sobered up."

She nodded. "Do you want some breakfast or coffee or anything?"

"That sounds great actually. Come on, I'll make us some eggs or something."

We made our way to the kitchen, but the smell of bacon and eggs and coffee met us along the way. Rosie had beaten us to the punch. I made a b-line towards the caffeine.

"Good morning ladies, I thought we'd have some brunch while we raked Ms. Swan here over the coals for details of her long evening spent on the rooftop with one dashing Mr. Edward Cullen."

"What?" Alice spun around towards me.

"Uugh. Rose, I told you, nothing happened!"

She turned away from the stove and pointed her spatula at me. "So you say."

"Ok, what'd I miss? Spill!" Alice was jumping up and down like a Chihuahua.

I put my phone in my lap as I sat down on the couch to enjoy my coffee only to feel it vibrating a few seconds later.

"_**You don't see yourself very clearly, do you?" – EC**_

_This guy…_

_Oh, what the hell. I'll humor him._

"_**Flattery will get you far in life, but you probably already know that. Yes. A valiant young gentleman saw to it that I made it through the night in one piece. I'll have to be sure to thank him for that the next time I see him. I didn't get to properly do so last night." - BS**_

His response was instantaneous.

"_**I think he's well aware of your gratitude. I think he may have realized it when a young, gorgeous damsel shared a piece of herself with him last night. He may mention his own gratitude and how he'd never be able to repay her for the trust she has in him." - EC**_

_Wow._

"_**I believe said damsel would laugh and tell him that he made it easy. She would thank him again and ask if she'd ever be able to repay the chivalry of said young gentleman." - BS**_

Two seconds flat.

"_**Said gentleman would tell her that, although it isn't necessary, he looks forward to the moment when they can repay each other." - EC**_

_Oh my…_

I looked up and Alice was looking at me funny.

"What?"

"Bella, you're blushing. Who are you texting over there?"

I blushed some more.

"Ooh! Edward and Bella sitting in a tree…K-I-S-S-I-N-G!"

"Alice!" I tried to sound frustrated, but it was hard to. I liked the sound of it too much.

"Before I forget, Jazz and I are going to see what Edward thinks about having a Halloween party this year. Rose is in and I figure I'll get started on everybody's costumes."

I nodded. A party sounded awesome.

"Now, I want to know everything, starting from the cab ride home last night." Alice said, coming over with her breakfast.

"You're just setting yourself up to be disappointed. There's really not much to tell."

"You may as well go ahead. She's working on cup number two," Rose laughed as she came over with my plate and hers.

So, I went through every piece of the night before, right up to the point that Rosie woke me up. She filled in the details about how she started to rip him a new one for taking advantage of me before she realized he was truly on the up and up. My heart may have even skipped a beat or two when she mentioned how he had kissed me on the forehead before he gathered up all of our empty beer bottles and went home.

"You like him, don't you?" Alice said, vibrating with anticipation.

I looked over at Rose and she was actually…smiling. No smart remark, no mother hen, no ruffled feathers over me putting my feelings on the line again. She truly looked happy.

"Yeah, I really think I do."

I should have known when she mentioned getting our costumes together that she would let me know that fairytales were real. _Really real._

xx_C_xx

I walked into the foyer of the dressing area trying to find some imaginary length in my skirt. All I found was more crinoline. That shit wasn't giving for anything.

"Hey Alice, do you have some pins or something for this bra? I don't know if I trust the bow in the back."

Her eyes lit up as she breezed past me.

"Sure honey, let me get a couple. You look fantastic, by the way. Very story book."

"Yeah Bella, you look hot. The wolves will be hovering tonight for sure." Emmett said, bumping up against Edward's shoulder.

I heard a low noise coming from their general direction.

_Did Edward just growl?_

"Thanks, guys. You all look pretty terrific yourselves."

I scanned each person, noting the couples and their matching outfits. Once I noticed that Edward wasn't just any old prince, but _Prince Charming_, I gave Alice the stink eye as she started to get me situated.

"What?"

"Subtlety, Alice?" I whispered, not wanting to draw anyone else's attention.

She whisper yelled right back.

"Subtlety my ass. I'm trying to get results here and you two are taking too long. Now shut up so we can get you fixed up back here."

She proceeded to secure my bows so the important ones wouldn't come loose during my shift. She stuck me every now and again, but I let it slide. She sort of had a point. _Pun intended_…

I hadn't seen much of Edward over the last week. School had been pretty busy with finals coming up and he'd been doing manager stuff on the nights that I did make it into work. I missed him. I couldn't tell him that. I didn't plan on telling him that. But I did, I missed him all the same.

I allowed my eyes to rake over his fine form as he perused himself in the full length mirror. He made one hell of a knight and shining armor if I did say so myself. And damn it, I did. His jacket complimented his muscular build and made him even broader in the shoulders, those same shoulders and arms that kept me warm and comforted that night on the rooftop.

He was majestic, in more ways than one. Majestic and regal and scrumptious. He was easily the stuff that daydreams were made of.

_Very storybook indeed. _

He looked like he had a lot on his mind, though. He had tried to tame his hair, constantly smoothing and rearranging it. But no matter how hard he tried, it still had that look like he'd been tugging on it more than usual. I tried to catch his gaze whenever he would turn and respond to something Emmett would say or if Jasper would ask a question, but his eyes were trained on that mirror. It was as if he were heavy in a contemplative concentration. More concentration than the style of his hair could ever actually need.

I strolled over toward the mirror that he was standing in front of once Alice finished me off. I could've sworn she had patted me on the ass and pushed me a little in his direction. I turned back towards her with a hairy eyeball, but she left my side with a wink and a smile.

_Traitor…_

"You're looking very dapper this evening, Mr. Cullen."

He looked every bit like a dying man in the desert. His brow was damp and he tugged at his collar like it would give him a reprieve. He squeezed his eyes shut tightly, as if he were trying to focus. I must have really done a number on him.

_Interesting…_

"Bella, you…I…I don't have words. You look spectacular. Much hotter than I ever remember Snow White being in the story."

My blush was automatic, I'm sure flaming over every inch of my exposed skin, but somehow, I couldn't find it in me to care.

"Thank you. Your sister seems to have a flare for the dramatic."

I tugged on my puffy sleeve and nervously tapped my royal blue heel against the floor.

"That would be an understatement."

He swept over my form again, visibly attempting to maintain but failing miserably.

I laughed a little. He had no idea how much I wanted to say fuck it all and climb him like a tree with him being all flustered and cute like this. And this horrible attempt at small talk amidst the obvious tension building between us was becoming uncomfortable. I couldn't help but wonder, like everybody else, what exactly we were waiting for.

Me? Yeah, I had my hang ups. I still have them, but verbalizing all of that, unloading it like I had the other night, was like getting a sigh of relief after holding my breath for much too long. Hearing it all, I guess I realized how stupid it truly was. How simple and naïve it made me sound. Once I combed through all of the bullshit again, I found a new perspective, one that I hadn't considered. You were supposed to be able to trust and it was alright to do it blindly. There was a risk to it all, sure, and unfortunately, I had taken the gamble and crapped out more than once.

Over the last week, I discovered that I didn't want to be that girl anymore. I didn't have to be. I had let the losses consume me and I was living my life just as I did that summer in Forks.

"How have you been? I haven't seen much of you since last weekend."

The low, slightly timid tone of his voice brought me out of my thoughts.

"Yeah, it's been pretty busy all around. I'm fine, really good. How about you?"

"I'm not bad at all, busy like you, but not bad."

"Good, good."

He raked his long fingers through his unruly hair. "So, do you think she's playing matchmaker with all this or just didn't want us to be the only ones not coupled up?"

He waved his hands between us to show me what he was talking about.

I tapped my chin, thinking it over.

_I wanted to scream to the high heavens: Yes! Yes! Let's give her what she wants! _

Not so much Alice, though. More like me. But my pride wouldn't let me say the words. Instead, I decided to mess with him a little. Play the part as it were.

"Hmm, that's an intriguing question. Honest answer?"

He looked around and nodded, satisfied that nobody else was within earshot.

"Of course."

I leaned in close, standing on my tippy toes.

"Honestly, I think it's a little of both."

I stepped back, taking a pregnant pause, but he wasn't having any of it.

"How do you feel about that?"

I shrugged. "You know your sister better than I do. I don't think it really matters how I feel about it."

His eyes widened in surprise, but he composed himself quickly.

"It matters…Bella."

Seriousness started to color his gorgeous face.

"Does it?"

"Yes, it does."

"Why?"

"Why what?"

"Why does it matter? Why does it matter how I feel about it?"

I was all for giving into this, whatever it was. But damn it if I was going to do it all on my own.

He looked pained, but I wasn't going to cave, not this time.

I crossed my arms and waited.

He rubbed the back of his neck.

I started to feel a smile form on my lips as I waited some more.

I glanced up at the clock and the time was ticking…literally. I needed to finish getting ready. The party paired with tonight's normal rush was sure to keep the place jumping all night long. If I was going to get this ball rolling, the time was now.

"How about this? How about you think about it and let me know?"

He nodded, not saying a word.

I turned toward the door, resisting the urge to look over my shoulder at him. I checked my ruby red lipstick and my cleavage in the mirror by the door before I pushed it open. I gave into my desire to see is face and it was just as I imagined it would be. He was flushed, beautiful and wanting. I strutted my stuff out that door for all that I was worth.

As I walked out of that room and into the crowd, I felt strong. I felt empowered. This feeling was new and I loved it, wanting so badly to make it a regular part of me. It was tingly and scary like the other times, but this time, the feeling was different. It was true and clear and totally worth the risk.

When he thought things over tonight, I hoped he considered the fact that I wasn't that bruised up little bird that I was on the rooftop the other night. I could be a damsel, but I was sick and so fucking tired of being distressed. Tonight he would find a new Bella in town, a Bella that was ready and waiting for him.

_If he wanted me, he'd better come and get me. Period._

Rose was waiting in the archway, looking at me in question. I looked at her quickly, hoping that I was maintaining my come hither stride.

"Don't say a word, just keep walking."

She looped her arm into mine and we walked into that party like we owned the place.

_Mahnolo Blahnik Barbie? Eat your fucking heart out._

**EPOV**

The sweat was pouring off of me in buckets, but I managed to make it out of that foyer without saying anything stupid. She wasn't there anyway, so it really wouldn't have mattered.

As I watched Bella walk off with Rosalie to start her shift, my heart was pounding and my mind was starting to take me to places that would not be good if I was stuck working behind the bar tonight. I would already have to watch her serving horny men at their tables, leaning over the bar to get drinks, and generally driving me insane without any clue to the trance she would have me under.

But maybe she did have a clue after all. The way she just left me to mull over what I thought about Alice and her efforts to get us together, why the way she felt about it mattered to me, spoke of something other than fear and the arms length that we'd been operating in.

I said I spent the day at home alone on Saturday to get some things done.

_Laundry._

That's all bullshit. I locked myself up in the house because I was wrapped up in my thoughts. Those thoughts were wrapped up in Bella. Bella eclipsed everything else and not telling her was making me crazy.

I could've dropped her off at home that night, but I didn't want to. I wanted to comfort her anyway that I could, anyway that she'd let me. She dug down deep and gave me all of the details of her past and released some of things that she had kept inside of her all of this time, causing her to maintain this distance. She's grown up so much since then, but she just couldn't seem to let herself get past it.

When she had finished purging it all, she smiled up at me. It was all sad and watery, but she was smiling none the less, allowing me to embrace her and keep her safe, even just for one night. I knew I was officially done for. I was hers.

And that was exactly what I wanted. I wanted to be somebody that she could lean on. I wanted to be a rock for her.

Those few hours gave me the glimpse that I needed of what we could be for each other if she would just let me in.

_Hell yes it mattered how she felt about it._ It was all that mattered because how I felt about it was tattooed on my forehead. I couldn't exactly tell her that, though. So I just nodded and watched her walk away.

I went into the men's restroom and took a minute to myself before I got situated for the night. Why in the hell did I ever say ok to Alice when she suggested we have a party? I should have known that she had tricks and treats up those skinny little munchkin sleeves of hers.

I splashed water on my face and took out way too many paper towels to dry myself off. It helped, but there was only one thing that would do the trick.

_Bella._

This little game we were playing was starting to wear me thin. I was a young, I was successful. Women liked me, they even thought I smelled nice, was easy to look at. Why shouldn't I just man up and ask her out? _No. Fuck a date at this point._ I needed to say fuck it all and ask her to be mine. The worst that could happen would be her saying no. She could say that, but why would she? And why the fuck was I so afraid that she would? I want her…so bad…and I know she feels something for me, too.

_This was getting to be beyond stupid._

The restroom door cracked a bit, letting some of the light from the hallway shine in on me. I looked up and Jasper was peeking inside with Emmett's head right above his. They chuckled and whispered amongst themselves before Jasper turned back towards me.

"You, Sir, are being a pussy."

_Damn it…_

"Yeah, you've said that a few times already. You know, why don't you asses try helping me instead of making fun of me all the time?"

They laughed a good bit and decided to have pity on me by coming in.

Jasper, ever the voice of reason, got straight to the point.

"What is it exactly that has you so afraid to just talk to her?"

Emmett chimed in. "Yeah man, I know she's into you. You know she's into you. It was sorta cute at first, but now you motherfuckers are seriously just wasting time now."

Never had I ever seen flawless reasoning come out of Emmett.

_Never._

I looked at myself long and hard in that mirror.

"You're right. There have been way too many chances, too many opportunities to make this shit happen. I'm going for it tonight."

The two idiots fist bumped or whatever, giving me manly words of encouragement, but I had tuned them out. I was determined. I was on a mission.

xx_C_xx

I walked out into the restaurant and the place was jumping. There were all sorts of costumed guests and employees milling about, enjoying the festivities. Alice and Jasper had outdone themselves. They had turned my respectable place of business into a den of iniquity.

Halloween must have been a pass for women to throw on their most scantily clad clothing and gallivant around the city showing anybody that wanted to see what they had to offer.

_Yeah, my sister and my girl were naked, too, but that was different._

There were cowboys and Indians, zombies and freaks, monsters and aliens. Any super hero that had ever been created was represented. Every league, legion and guild was in attendance. Popular movies and books showed their popularity, too. There were wizards, warlocks and a shit load of vampires and werewolves crammed into every open space.

I made my way through them all to start setting things up at the bar where a few of the barmaids were slicing fruit. The sound system was doing its thing and the crowd was loving it. Mike wasn't due in the booth for a little while yet since the dinner shift was just starting, but instead of being a fucking professional and preparing for his long night, this bastard had _my_ girl pinned up by the kitchen door. His costume was clearly that of a rapper. He had on a full adidas sweat suit, a kangol and many thick gold chains hanging from his neck. He even had gold fronts in his mouth.

We had only been separated for a matter of minutes, but I guess that was long enough for him to spot her and move in. This was my first taste of what tonight was going to be like. It wouldn't be a party for me at all. This was going to be another shift on patrol.

I made my way towards them, fully prepared to kick the shit out of Mike, damn the fact that he was an employee and I was his manager. He had his back to me, leaned in super close to Bella. She was pressed as far up against the wall as she could, clearly trying to avoid any physical contact with him.

His approach actually came off as sort of sad. It was all very high school. It would have been simple to sneak up and pull him off of her. He wouldn't know what hit him if I decided to follow my instincts and go that route.

My eyes locked with Bella's and I knew she was ok, amused even. I still didn't fucking like it. I stopped short and settled myself against the railing to listen in on the game that he was putting down for her.

_Hell, I may even be able to get some tips from him…_

_No, wait. I think I just threw up a little in my mouth._

"Bella, you know I have a hard enough time keeping myself away from you. You and this costume are going to drive me crazy all night while I watch you move from up in that booth."

_Amen, brother._

"Mike, I already told you. I think you are a nice enough guy, but I'm just not interested in you like that."

_That's my girl._

"You just don't realize that you are, but we can work on that. I have ways of changing your mind."

He made a move to run his fingers through her hair, but she artfully dodged him and did it herself.

"I just bet you do."

"You can count on it, Babe."

"Look, Mike, you're sweet, but why don't you do yourself a favor and spend your time more constructively. You should try getting the attention of one of the lovely young ladies here tonight."

"Why in the world would I waste my time doing that? I told you when you first got here you were it for me."

_Did you, now?_

"Mike, we've already been through this."

"You just wait. I'm going to wear you down. You may as well just come out with me tonight; let me show you what you've been missing."

_Alright, that's enough of that._

He wasn't actually touching her, so I wouldn't necessarily have to break his fingers or anything. I could hardly fault him, though. Bella was amazing anyway, but tonight, she was on a whole other planet. I couldn't be mad at him for going for his, but I reserved the right to fuck him up a bit for it later.

I cleared my throat loudly, causing him to jump away from her. I switched modes from jealous wanna be boyfriend to jealous, territorial, but by the book employer flawlessly.

"Mr. Newton, I'm going to have to ask you to refrain from sexually harassing your co-workers if you plan on remaining under my employ."

He went on the defensive, not realizing how much of the exchange I had overheard.

"Mr. Cullen, I wasn't harassing her, we were just talking and…"

"That's not what it looked like Mike. You looked like you were seconds away from invading her personal space even more than you already have. I'd hate to have to call security and have you tossed out of here."

"No need to call security. It's already here." Emmett said from behind me, cracking his knuckles with several loud pops in rapid succession.

Mike immediately went into panic mode.

"Come on guys, there's no need to get physical. We were just having a conversation, right Bella?"

She looked on, twirling a lock of her hair around her finger and sort of shrugging at him. She looked so innocent and clueless that all she needed was a lollipop in her hand. She didn't confirm or deny anything.

"Yep, that's all I needed to hear. Let's go, Newton." Emmett scooped him up by his collar and led him away from the scene for a 'pep' talk. "What'd I tell you about being a fucking jackass?" He scolded as he smacked Mike upside the head a few times.

I watched on in pleasure as he squirmed in Emmett's choke hold, leaving little pieces of his pride in his wake. _Poor bastard._ I looked over, instinctually wanting to check on Bella, make sure she was ok. She was still just as dazzling as she had been when she left me a few moments before. She stood as tall as her heels would allow her, crossing her arms and arching a perfect eyebrow at me. She was fantastic. We closed the gap between us, moving towards each other purposefully.

I couldn't quite put my finger on it as I watched her moving closer. I just couldn't figure out what this change was that had come over Bella. It wasn't the costume, although that was a pleasant surprise of epic proportions. No, it wasn't anything superficial that had changed. It had to have been something during this past week, but whatever it was looked damned good on her.

It was almost like a light had been turned on inside of her, emanating through her pores, brightening her eyes and her smile. It was more confident. She seemed much surer of herself. I don't know, but it was more of _something_.

Mike must've been dropped on his head as a baby if he thought he was going to be the one to win Bella over. I knew then that there would be no more of this passing me by shit. If I couldn't get her, he didn't have a snowballs' chance in hell.

"So, I see you have a bit of an admirer?" I said, trying to keep my curious grin from overtaking my face. I was officially in boss mode, after all. We'd have to discuss this new her later. _In detail._

She rolled her eyes. "Tell me about it. He's starting to become a bit of a pest."

_Wait a minute…so this is a regular thing with him? How did I miss that?_

"A pest, huh?"

"A sleazy one at that."

_I would need to have a word with him about a few things. _

"Has this happened a lot before?"

Her eyes got bigger and she answered quickly.

"No, well, yeah, a few times. I figured I had it under control."

I didn't want to respond based on my personal feelings about the situation, but it still needed to be addressed.

"Bella, you should have told somebody. He can't work here if he's going to stalk my female employees."

_There, that was impartial._

"I did! I told Rose and she made me tell Emmett since he's the head of security. I took care of it. I even attempted having a talk with him myself. He's a persistent little sleaze ball, but he's harmless. I didn't want to get him into trouble."

I didn't feel the need to let her know that my feelings were slightly hurt that she didn't come to me if this was becoming an issue for her.

"I'm sure you can handle yourself Bella, but this could turn into something bigger and could affect more people…Out of curiosity, what did you tell him?"

_There goes that eyebrow again._

"Well, I told him something that I thought would make any reasonably sane person back off."

"And what was that?"

She reached inside the kitchen door and grabbed an apron before she moved in, dangerously close and tight to my side, causing that entire portion of my body to ignite.

"I told him, unequivocally and without exception, I do not date men that I work with. Not at all. Speaking of…I need to get to work."

She waltzed off, tying the apron over top of that wonderfully sorry excuse for a skirt.

_Huh…_

xx_C_xx

**Part two of the party is next…**


	13. Let's Chill

**As per usual…**

Quotes, images, songs, and lyrics belong to their respective writers and/or artists.

Sadly enough, I _don't_ own anything related to Twilight. I _do_ own my original characters and my original story. No copyright infringement is intended.

I do not have a beta, so my apologies in advance. Anyone willing to take on the task, I'd love to chat with you!

Hate it or love it…let me know. Matter of fact, tell a friend! I won't mind!

**Part two, my lovelies…**

**Chapter 13 – Let's Chill**

_Have you ever wondered which hurts the most: saying something and wishing you had not, or saying nothing, and wishing you had?  
>- Author Unknown<em>

**EPOV**

I had decided to lay low and plan my strategy to get Bella to be mine before this night was over. How was I supposed to do that when I constantly had to lay my hands on people to keep theirs off of her? This was getting ridiculous.

Emmett, Jasper and I were like a three man tag team, snatching motherfuckers up left and right from getting up on Rosalie, Alice or Bella. They were like locusts. The worse ones were the dudes dressed up like they were some suave, Don Juan type dickheads. Those were the Zorro's, the Green Lanterns and every one of those fucking vampire douche bags.

"Fuck! They're coming out of the wood work tonight, man. Whose genius idea was it to have this shit, anyway?" Emmett whined as he sat down on a bar stool. Being the head of security was wearing on him tonight.

"You can thank your boy here and his girl for that one." I chuckled, drying a couple of wine glasses.

"What did you just say?" Jasper asked.

Emmett looked between us, but didn't say a word. Stumbling over himself wouldn't help.

"You and Alice." I clarified. It wasn't even a question.

_Who else would I be talking about?_

"You called her my girl," he whispered, bashfully putting his hands into his tight assed pants pockets.

"Yes, I did. Apparently, so do you." I whispered back.

I was tired of playing all these games, including theirs.

I laughed loudly as he looked back at me, bright eyed and bushy tailed. He was completely speechless and in utter shock. _That shit was priceless_.

"It's all good. We'll talk later." I said, patting him on his back.

xx_C_xx

Our shift was winding down and Mike was in the booth now. Garrett and Liam were getting ready to take over for us at the bar. It was funny how we didn't have any trouble getting people to volunteer for the later shift we had added on for the occasion. The lights had gone down even lower and the diners had made way for those that simply wanted to drink and party.

"I love what you've done with the place, son."

I looked up at the sound of the familiar voice and found my mom's hazel eyes looking back at me. She and my dad had been out of the country for the last few months doing charity work. Mom usually stayed behind when he went on his trips like this, going to remote parts of the country and abroad providing medical supplies and care for the less fortunate. He would usually be gone for a few weeks at a time, but this would be an extended trip. I don't think they could bear to be apart much longer than that, so she decided to just go with him.

Married for years and more in love than they were when they first got together. Most kids would gag at the thought, but I wanted to find a love like that. My other half.

"Mom!"

I made my way to the other side of the bar like I was five years old again after my first day of kindergarten. I had no shame in being a momma's boy.

She hugged me hard. "Edward, it's so good to see you! I missed you! Where's my darling girl?"

"I'm not sure; I thought she was at the hostess station. When did you get back? I thought you'd be gone another month or so?"

"We were supposed to be, but we cut the trip short because of some unrest building within the country. I spoke with Alice when our flight arrangements had been finalized and she told us about the party that you were hosting for the holiday. You know we've always enjoyed Halloween, especially when you guys were younger."

She looked around the restaurant, not having been here to see any of the changes we had instituted. She took it all in, beaming with pride. She had been a major influence in our first round of designs and Alice had learned a great deal from her in that regard. Our new design was no exception.

I hadn't laid eyes on my mother in so long. I don't think I realized just how much I missed talking to her on a regular basis until I heard her voice again. She looked really good, like she had gotten some sun. I don't think I had ever seen her in fishnets before, though. The red and white gingham, maybe, but definitely never with a black corset laced up around it. And her hair is in pigtails?

I looked at her skeptically.

"Mom, where's dad?"

"Oh, your father made a stop in the men's room when we came in."

Just as I turned, my father was shaking hands with Emmett and Jasper near the archway in the front, flanked by a joyful looking Alice.

_She's always been such a daddy's girl. _

He looked smooth in a tailored charcoal suit, confusing me even more as I looked back over at my mother, fighting the urge to cover her up.

"So, why are you in a costume but dad isn't?"

"We're both in costume, honey. Stop looking at me like that. I'm your mother, but I'm not dead you know."

"Yeah, I know," and I did, but her in a pair of black stilettos was making me uncomfortable.

"Son! How have you been?"

I embraced my father while my mother snatched Alice up into a bear hug.

"How are you holding up, old man?"

"You wish I were an old man. I've got your mother here to keep me young and spry."

_Oh my damn…_

"Speaking of, I've been trying to figure out how and why you let her out of the house like this."

I waved my hand from the tip of her head to the pointed heels of her feet to emphasize my concern.

"Loosen up, Edward. This is a party, right?"

Before I could answer him, he pulled a wolf mask from inside his lapel and tugged it on over his head.

"Come on, Sweetheart, let's cut a rug!"

I groaned.

"Oh Lord, not you too!"

My mom picked up a wicker basket that I hadn't noticed before and handed it off to Alice. Leave it to my mother and father to come to our Halloween party as Red Riding Hood and the Big Bad Wolf. I refused to call her 'Little.'

"Give me a minute, honey. I want to have a word with Edward."

Alice came quickly from around the bar after stowing mom's basket. "Come on Dad, I'll help you get warmed up."

They walked arm and arm out onto the dance floor.

"I always thought Bella was a lovely girl, Edward."

I gave her a knowing smile.

"Alice?"

"Yes, Alice. I've known Bella since they started college together. Her father, too. Wonderful man, by the way. At any rate, she's shared her thoughts with me on the subject and I can't say that I would disagree with her assessment."

Her eyes sparkled as she spoke to me. She always had a knack for giving me her opinion whether I asked her for it or not. I guess she figured it was her right as a mother.

"Is there anything that I can do to help?"

I glanced around the room, noting my employees as they wrapped up the shift change, some heading out while some stayed to enjoy the rest of the evening. I noticed Bella and Rosalie coming out of the kitchen doors. By the way Rosalie was shifting her cleavage, they must have done whatever it is they do with the Kitty back there since we were so overrun with people tonight. They were headed in the direction of the dressing rooms.

"No, but don't worry. I'm working on it."

She caught the direction of my gaze and gave me that smile that only a mother can give and patted me on the cheek.

"Whatever you do, don't let her slip out of your hands, Edward. This isn't something that comes around every day."

_Don't I know it…?_

She squeezed my hand tight and made her way through the crowd to join my father.

xx_C_xx

I waited patiently by the archway, shifting from one foot to the other like a maniac.

Once Bella and Rosalie emerged from freshening up or whatever, I tried to ignore the fact that I was starting to sweat again. My hands were all clammy and my mouth was running dry.

_Game face, Edward. Don't buckle under the pressure now._

I tugged lightly on her elbow.

She turned towards me defensively at first, which I couldn't blame her for after all the shit they had dealt with tonight from handsy customers during the dinner shift. I held my hands up in surrender.

Once she realized it was me, her face calmed and she smiled. She turned towards Rosalie who nodded and kept walking.

"Hey," she said, seeming shy all of a sudden.

"Hey. Dance with me?"

"Edward, I don't really…"

"Please?" I cut her off before she could tell me no. I was itching for some alone time with her. It had been far too long. I wasn't above begging at this point.

She exhaled and mouthed, "Ok."

I took her hand and we made our way out onto the floor. The Isley Brothers were crooning away as we found a spot towards the center. The anticipation of actually being here with her gave clarity to our situation. Gone were the clammy hands. I needed to make this happen. We faced each other and began swaying to the music.

_I wanna be living for the love of you._

_All that I'm giving's for the love of you…_

_I might as well_

_Sign my name on a card which could say it better._

_Time will tell_

_Cause it seems that I've done just about all that I can do._

_I know that I'm living for the love of you._

_I know that I'm living for the love of you…_

"You know, this is the first time we've ever danced together."

She swallowed hard; the mounting tension between us was becoming overwhelming.

"It is, isn't it?"

"Yea. I never got the chance to last time."

Our foreheads pressed together. I let my fingers move up and down her arms slowly before winding them around her small waist.

"I don't usually dance, not to slow songs anyway."

I could tell that she was being reserved, so I decided to tease her a little.

"You know, I could always make you."

The dark brown depths of her eyes spoke volumes as she stared me down with absolute conviction.

"I'm…I'm not afraid of you."

My heart stuttered at the same time she did. _Progress_.

She had just allayed one of my deepest fears with a few short words from her lips, my fear that she was afraid of me, afraid of us washed over me and dissolved.

Luckily for her, the music had transitioned into an upbeat tune before I could analyze her statement further. Luckily for me, that meant I could keep her out here with me a little longer. She relaxed and we were able to enjoy this rare moment of closeness.

_Let's chill  
>Girl I don't want to rush tonight<br>Take your time when you're with me baby  
>So I can give you what you need, I know what you like<br>Let's Chill  
><em>_It's obvious that girl you're fine__  
><em>_But I just wanna make love to your mind__  
>So if you open up your heart I'll give you mine<br>Let's Chill_

It was all very chaste and playful at first.

She had her back to me with a fair amount of space between us as we danced to the song which, I had to admit, was starting to speak to me. It got inside my head as well as into the movements of my body if that makes any sense at all.

The best way that I can describe it is like the lyrics and the rhythm and the tone, everything about it, inserted itself into my every motion. The way I moved a little closer to her, the way my hands swept across her bare midriff, the way my fingers traced the shell of her hips. There was more meaning there, more energy pulsating and rippling between us.

Bella must've felt the same way because, just as the beat started to crescendo, she turned around and faced me. She worked up a sweat as she ground into me deeply, emulating the beat and my emotions to a tee.

She let her arms cross around my neck, allowing her eyes to linger along with mine as she toyed with the fine hairs there. I cracked my knuckles to keep my hands from drifting past her waist line; the temptation to let them fall further and explore unknown areas of her anatomy was maddening. Her fingers continued to tug, like she was fighting her own urges to pull me closer. The music was penetrating her in the very same way that it was drawing the words out of my soul and handing them to her on a platter. I prayed she was feeling this too:

_If you ready then I'm ready go, hear this on my radio.  
><em>_Hennessey is in my blood, don't tell me you gon' tell me no_._  
>Tell me that you love me most, I tell you you the only one.<br>__Tell me where you want me go, never mind I know what's up.__  
><em>_Come and see what I'm about, pull your hair you say my name_._  
><em>_Now you scratchin' on my back, I see your pleasure in my pain_._  
>She crack a smile, I'm finna turn it out.<br>__Probably won't last long, you know it's been a while_…

By this point, we were both panting. A mess of limbs and sweat and heavy breathes.

We rode the beat out together, but there were no words spoken between us. The energy that we just shared seemed to say it all. The next song started, but neither one of us moved an inch. We just stared at the reflections looking back at us. Measuring, detailing, memorizing.

"Excuse me, but can I cut in? You've been hogging him all night."

And the spell was broken.

We both looked up to find Gianna, dressed in a slutty French maids uniform, fuming.

"I'm sorry…I didn't catch that." Bella said.

She was still in my arms, but I could feel her body coiling up to spring at any moment. The more Gianna spoke, the more tense she became. All of her muscles were tightening, elongating.

_Would I be wrong to admit that I found her defensive posturing to be hot as all fucking hell?_

_Never mind, I don't have to admit it. I'm a man. You can figure it out._

I held onto her tighter, becoming fearful of what would happen if I let her go as Gianna kept talking, missing all of the bright yellow penalty flags dropping around us.

"You heard me. You think just because you're all dolled up like a princess tonight that you get to keep Edward all to yourself?" She took a moment to flick her hair over her shoulder. "You are no princess and you've been with him long enough. There are other women in here that want a crack at him and you're a damn distraction."

She didn't move and her exterior was as calm as an autumn evening, but her fists were twitching and balling up behind my neck.

"Is that right?" She growled.

_Fucking growled!_

Gianna smirked, completely oblivious to what was about to happen to her. She looked at me quickly and then returned her gaze to Bella, thinking she'd won.

"Yes. Move. On."

I had thought about holding her back, I really did. But once I felt her arms slip from around my neck, I knew I didn't want to. I wanted to see what she had in her.

In less than two seconds, Gianna was flat on her back with Bella standing over her. Everyone stopped what they were doing and were watching the show. Rosalie was at the front of the crowd, arms crossed and observing, having elbowed her way through, no doubt. Alice was next to her, jumping up and down, trying to see better. Dad had his arms wrapped tightly around my mom's waist as they looked on. Emmett was at my side with Jasper, but I held out my hand to keep either of them from interfering.

Bella was a big girl and could handle herself. She was defending her territory. Making her mark and I loved it.

_My girl was beautiful and a bad ass._

**BPOV**

I should have probably felt bad that Gianna had to catch the beat down that had been simmering inside of me all night, but I didn't. Between Mike's pushy ass and Edward working his own brand of magic, sparking a monstrosity of a volcano that was full to bursting with feelings and desires, one that was bubbling up and overflowing within me, somebody was bound to get it. My vote had been for Edward, but fate had other plans.

_Bottom line, that bitch shouldn't have been talking shit._

The worse part of it was that it all went down with Alice and Edward's mom and dad there. _Ugh._ I was too mortified for words once I realized it. I hadn't even had a chance to speak to them.

No, I didn't feel bad for putting her in her place, but the rest of the night had me horrified.

Once Gianna told me to move on like she had some sort of claim on Edward, I snapped. Before I knew what I was doing, I had pushed her as hard as I could. She fell ass first onto the floor even harder.

_Damn Cow._

I yanked on the straps of her costume since she didn't have on a real shirt. During the melee, I caught sight of Rose out of my peripheral. She made a move as if to help me, but I gave her a look that I hoped told her I had it all under control.

"Who exactly am I moving on for? You?"

She floundered like a fish out of water as I stood over her. For all of her venom and exterior beauty, she was simply your average, everyday, generally unhappy person. She was just another one of those mean girls that had to talk bad about other people in order to make herself feel better about who she was. I had seen enough of those bitches in high school.

She tried getting up, tried reaching out to find purchase on my skirt, but I yanked on the straps of her top even harder to get her to stay still long enough to listen.

"You're lucky I don't smack the shit out of you just for being a bitch. You walk around here showing people, people that you've never even taken the time out to get to know, a whole a lot of disrespect and that shit stops now. Starting with me. If you want time with that man over there, then you go ahead and try to take it, but I guarantee you that you will be right back here on this fucking floor unless he decides that he'd really rather spend time with a tramp like you."

I let her go and brushed myself off, straightening out my skirt that she had mangled in her attempts to gain some leverage. Everyone in the place was staring and pointing, mouths wide open. Gianna had finally gotten up and was yelling all sorts of obscenities at me, but I couldn't really hear her anymore.

_Oh God…_

My head was spinning. Could all of these people hear me threatening that girl about having to go through me to get time with Edward? What right did I really have to stake a claim on him like that?

_At work! _

_In public!_

How much did he hear of that?

_Oh God…_

The wind had literally been knocked out of me at the mere thought of what I'd just done.

Edward and everybody else I cared about watched me with a mixture of expressions on their faces. Some looked surprised, others looked amused, and a little pride may have even been mixed in there for good measure. I don't think many of them had ever seen me actually take care of my own drama before.

_Yes, new Bella was in full affect, but nobody said that new Bella couldn't be embarrassed as all hell. _

I made a beeline for the front door.

"Bella, wait! Stop!"

I could hear people yelling for me to stop, but there was no way in hell that that was going to happen.

"Bella! Wait! Come back!"

I tripped a little on some balloons or something. When walking wasn't carrying me fast enough, I snatched my heels off and made a run for it.

With my tip money securely tucked away in my cleavage thanks to Rosie, I hailed a cab and went home. My clothes, my purse, my phone, my house key, everything was still in my locker, back at Clarity. I didn't care though. I just had to get out of there…

xx_C_xx

Once Rose made it up the steps to the fourth floor of our building, I was sitting in front of our door, curled up into a little ball, wiping my tears away. Thank God for giving Alice the forethought to buy us boy shorts for these costumes.

I had found New Bella, which was great. New Bella knew what she wanted. New Bella had the power to get it, but New Bella went right ahead and fucked it all up before she could.

"You alright there, Slugger?" Rose laughed as she stepped around me to unlock the door.

_She laughed!_

"Shut up!" I said, biting back my own laughter amidst my sniffling.

"Come on, Laila. I grabbed your purse and everything from the locker room."

She held her hand out to help me up off of the floor.

I walked back into my bedroom and shed my clothing, tugging on a t-shirt. After washing my face and brushing my teeth, I came back out to find Rose sitting on my bed. She had pulled my phone out of my purse and handed it to me.

"Embarrassed?"

"Yes. A little."

"Bella, the only thing that you have to be embarrassed about is the fact that you didn't punch that bitch."

I flopped backwards onto the mattress.

"Rose! How could I have done that? I shouldn't have let her get to me like that, and in front of Edward's parents?"

"Bella," she tried to stop me.

"And then all of those things I said. How can I show my face around there again? He heard everything, Rose! He probably thinks I'm crazy. I've ruined it all."

"Bella! Will you fucking stop?"

She was laughing again, but I didn't see what was so funny.

"Bella, they all thought that was the coolest thing they had ever seen you do. You got the fuck outta there so fast; you didn't give anybody a chance to tell you."

I sat up and thought about it for a minute.

"I may as well have just peed on him. I should have gone ahead and bit her like a dog and peed on him."

She laughed even more.

"Bella, you are one piece of work. I don't even have words for you right now. Go to bed. I'll wake you up in the morning; we all have a cleanup shift tomorrow. You and I are responsible for bagels."

She turned off the light as she left.

I curled up on the bed, but I knew I wouldn't be going to sleep anytime soon. I looked at my phone, but instead of looking at it to see the messages that were flashing there; I cut it off and laid it on the night stand.

xx_C_xx

The next morning found me tired and a little cranky. The last thing I wanted to do was go into Clarity. I didn't want to have to apologize or see the disappointment in Edward's eyes when he'd have to reprimand me for how I had behaved. Let's not even discuss the other ways that I'm sure I'd disappointed him.

I didn't bother grabbing my phone, leaving it to charge. I showered, put on some jean shorts and a pullover and threw my hair into a messy ponytail.

We stopped at the bakery and grabbed some bagels and cream cheese for everybody coming in to help with the cleanup. There were people milling around when we arrived, but I would imagine not many people would show for another hour or so with the late night that most of them had.

"You want some juice?" Rose asked as she went behind the bar to get glasses.

"Sure, why not." I said. I plopped myself down onto a stool and started slathering cream cheese onto an everything bagel.

Just then, the sound system blared with the theme song to Rocky.

I spun around on the stool to see Emmett up in the DJ booth, bobbing his head and pointing both fingers at me. I didn't want to give in, but it was hard to not find Emmett funny. His constant good mood was infectious.

I smiled, but went back to preparing my bagel.

He came down from the booth.

"Aww, Little One! What's wrong? You totally rocked the house last night!" he asked, grabbing a bagel of his own.

"Emmett, I made a complete ass of myself."

Before he could respond, another voice beat him to it.

"No, you didn't actually."

We both looked up to see Edward walking in with a few boxes of donuts in his arms.

"Umm, I think I'm gonna go find Rosie." Emmett said quickly, backing away with his bagel and three glazed donuts.

"Coward!" I yelled after him.

"Right back atcha, babe!" He replied, laughing at me.

_Why was I so fucking funny to everybody all of a sudden?_

I didn't want to look at him. I didn't want to chance having him revert back to the Edward that I met on my first day here. I didn't want that at all. I wanted yesterday to be so much more than it turned out to be. I didn't want to be the possessive, crazed, not even close to being a girlfriend that most men hated to be around.

He sat down next to me.

I pulled sesame seeds off of my bagel.

"Bella, I think…"

_No. No no no no! _

_I couldn't take a licking and keep on ticking right now. What he thought would just have to wait._

"Juice."

He stopped, looking at me like I had startled him.

"I'm sorry. What?"

"We need juice. You want some juice? Or milk. I'm gonna go and see if we have some juice or some milk to go with breakfast."

I hopped up and ran into the kitchen where Emmett and Rose were hiding out.

"Did you talk to him?" Rose asked, flipping through a magazine while Emmett stuffed his face.

"No. I can't. I can't do it."

"Un-frickin believable." Emmett said around a mouthful of donut.

He got up and went to the walk in refrigerator.

Rose tsk tsk'd me as she read through an article.

He came out with a few jugs of juice, orange and apple and cranberry. He sat them on the table and came right up to my face, damn near touching my nose with his.

"Here, we are gonna start over. You take a couple of these and I'll take a couple. We are going to go back out there, because I didn't just see you run in here like some scared ass little girl just now. That is not you and you can face him. It's just Edward. You two idiots are damn near a couple. You already would be if you'd just pull your heads out of your asses."

"Milk." I said.

He stopped in the same way that Edward had just a moment ago.

"What?"

"Milk. I said I was getting juice _and_ milk," I clarified.

"Un-frickin believable." He said, shaking his head and adding two gallons of milk into the mix.

I took a moment to breathe while Rose snickered to herself, continuing to flip through pages.

"Aren't you supposed to be cleaning?" I asked.

"Why? You're the one with the mess." She shot back.

"Come on now, chop chop. Grab some juice, we're about to do this."

I couldn't believe Emmett was the one trying to knock some sense into me. I gave in because there was no way to argue my point. I was scared and I didn't want to. That was the best that I had. It sounded childish, even to me.

I felt like I was getting ready to walk the green mile. I panicked again and turned back to Emmett who was following close behind me. He just stood there smiling, arms full of jugs and humming the Rocky theme.

"Geez…" I mumbled under my breath.

More people had arrived and the full cleanup effort was underway. The troops were glad to see some beverages on the scene and came up to lighten our load.

Edward was behind the bar, gathering up the dirty glasses that had been brought up from various places around the room and stacking them onto trays. His brow was furrowed and I knew that I had a good part in putting it there. I doubt he heard me approaching him at all.

"Did you want some help with these?" I asked.

xx_C_xx

**EPOV**

"Did you want some help with these?" Bella asked.

I looked down at the endless rows of dirty glasses that I had lined up on the counter. I hadn't realized that there were so many.

"Sure, if you don't mind."

"No, I don't mind at all."

I wanted to pull a Mike Newton and trap her up against a wall or shake some sense into her or something. But no, I wasn't going to do that. Not this time. We had come much too far for any of that.

She asked me to think about something and I had spent the entire night doing just that, especially after I had given up trying to reach her on her cell phone after she fled. The way that she ran was kind of funny at first, but that was before we all realized that she wasn't actually coming back, that she had bailed for real.

No, there would be none of that today. We were adults and we'd talk whenever she was ready to.

We both picked up some glasses and headed to the kitchen area. I held the swinging door open for her as she slid past me.

"Ladies first," I said, glancing down when I knew she wouldn't notice me checking out the assets. Those shorts were 'mighty fine' as Jasper would say. Not as fine as the green ones, but short denim also had its merits.

We made a few more trips like that. Once we had carried in the last of them, Bella shrugged off her hoodie to reveal a gray tank top underneath it. She turned the hot water on at the sink and started the arduous task of washing glasses.

I sat mine down next to her and grabbed a towel to dry them with.

"Bella, I think I should thank you for what you did last night. I tried to reach you after you left, so I want to go ahead and tell you that now, even if you don't want to talk about it."

She looked up at me through those dark eyelashes of hers in a way that almost made me give in and forget about my resolve. I was almost ready to cave and let her have this all her way. She clearly had no idea what she did to me.

"Why in the world would you be thanking me for that?" She asked.

Thankfully, it took her a few moments to get what I was saying, but those few moments allowed me to attempt to regain my composure. Instead of composure, though, I had gained a front row seat into her huge brown eyes staring directly into my green ones, like I was getting ready to reveal one of life's deep, dark secrets. I found myself getting lost in them as I unconsciously took two steps closer to her.

"I've never been on the other side of chivalry like that before. I was the one dressed up like a prince, but you saved me from Gianna's clutches instead. Thanks for that."

I was standing so close to her, I could feel her sharp exhale of warm, cherry scented breathe. Something had shifted between us in that moment and, even though I had no idea where we would go from here, the thumping in my chest told me that I liked it.

"That's an interesting way of thinking about it," she said after another shallow exhale and a step in my direction. "I would've thought you would have been completely appalled and repelled by the possessive ranting and raving of a crazy person?"

If I had been thinking clearly, I would have removed myself from the kitchen and this moment as soon as I smelled her cherry lip gloss. We were at the restaurant with a place full of people, but seeing as how I never thought clearly around Bella, _my Bella_, I only seemed to be pushing myself further into this moment.

"Well," I said, taking a chance and running a single finger along her forearm, feeling the silky soft skin there. "I never saw it as crazy. I saw it as a completely reasonable reaction, especially considering the circumstances."

I ran that same finger up the rest of her arm and allowed it to linger along her collarbone as I followed it with my eyes, landing on her soft, supple lips. They were begging for me to quit messing around and kiss them.

_How could anyone ever be this naturally beautiful? Not a drop of makeup was on her face, only lip gloss. _

I trailed my finger along her cheekbone, realizing that Bella appeared to be just as mesmerized as I was.

Bella parted her lips to speak, but before she could utter a word, Emmett came bursting through the doors of the kitchen, making Bella jump. I took three steps back in response.

"Dude, what the fuck are you doing in here? Newton is about to settle an argument for us. Jasper swears that Teddy Pendergrass drops more panties than the Isley Brothers. I think that's bullshit."

Once he finally stopped talking, he took a deep breath and looked at the space between me and Bella. I rolled my eyes at his unasked question and took the towel that I had barely used to dry glasses with and threw it over my shoulder.

"When did Jasper get here?" I asked.

"A few moments ago. Alice is here, too."

"Oh, ok. Well, Bella and I were doing some cleaning up. Why the hell aren't you all doing the same?"

She looked away quickly and continued to wash the glasses in the sudsy water.

"Dude, chill. Don't be a dick, this place'll be spick and span by the time we're done. When you guys finish, you should come out and help us decide. I'm so gonna wipe the floor with his ass!" He said as he went back out the door as quickly as he had come.

Rather than tempt fate twice, I opted not to go back to my drying duty and decided to do a quick run of the inventory before it got too late into the morning. With so much traffic, I had my doubts that we'd be able to hash this out without being interrupted a million more times.

"I'm gonna go over some inventory, Bella. Holler if you need me." I called over my shoulder as I walked further into the kitchen where we stored the liquor.

"Ok." She replied.

After about a half hour, I was satisfied with the state of our liquor supply. I had jotted down a few essentials that would need to be ordered first thing Monday morning and had made a mental note to do that and order a few more beer steins. As I stood and placed my notepad in my back pocket, I could hear some shouting from the front of the club and "For the Love of You" blaring through the speakers. By the sound of it, Emmett and Jasper were still in the heat of battle.

I chuckled at their antics and when I remembered dancing with Bella to that very song the night before. I'd have to disappoint one of them by letting them know that the Isley Brothers song didn't end getting a single thing dropped for me last night.

I went back toward the front of the kitchen where I found Bella standing on her tippy toes precariously on some stacked milk cartons and reaching into a cupboard that was clearly too high for her. Even though I had been side tracked by the view, her calves and ass looking absolutely stunning in the position she was in, I was able to make it over to catch her right as she started to take a tumble.

"Bella, are you nuts?" I asked as she squealed in both surprise and relief. "I told you to holler if you needed help."

The way she fit so perfectly in my arms last night was a memory that had been placed indelibly on my brain. I wondered if she would still feel like perfection within my embrace when it was by accident. I wound my arms tighter around her waist just to test my theory.

_Yep. Perfect._

"I – I didn't think I did. I thought I could reach it fine with the cartons." She answered as she looked up at me and stroked the hair on my exposed forearms.

Again, I found myself lost within her gaze, lost in the feel of her and lost in another moment where we found ourselves closer to one another then we rightfully should have been.

I felt my face moving closer to hers of its own accord. I never pictured our first kiss taking place in the kitchen like this, and I knew that we had too many things that had gone unsaid between us, but damn it if I was going to be the one to stop it from happening. At the rate that we had been going, it was never going to happen at all.

As her sweet breathe blew across my face, I may have gone just a bit insane.

"Thank you for catching me," she whispered, almost too quietly for me to hear her.

She looked up from my chest and into my eyes. I couldn't help but notice the hooded, lazy expression that had come over them. I looked between her eyes and her lips, again wanting to heed their call.

"Hey Edward, is there anymore ajax or 409 back here?" Rosalie yelled, much louder than she really needed to.

"God dammit!" I yelled before I could stop myself.

I was more frustrated than I thought at being interrupted a second time. Bella jumped down and reached under the sink to get the cleaning supplies for Rose.

"Here you go, Rose," Bella said as she handed her the containers. "Let's go check on the boys and their little competition."

Bella pushed Rosalie through the doors before she could cuss me out about my blow up. I couldn't be sure if Bella completely understood my frustration with everything in that moment, but as she looked over her shoulder before the door swung shut behind her, I knew that she did.

I stood stuck in that same spot, feeling my jaw clench and pulling on the roots of my hair.

I had a million and one questions but no answers to speak of.

Once I pulled myself together, I walked out of the kitchen to find my place looking like new. Any remnants of the party from the night before were gone and every surface sparkled. Everybody had gathered around the DJ booth, listening to songs as Newton played and Jasper and Emmett called them out, claiming to have the perfect song to make any woman melt.

"Ok, fuck the bullshit, I'm not playing anymore." Emmett yelled. "I've got something for you fuckers that will bring the house down and crown me king."

Instead of telling Newton what to put on, Emmett got behind the turntables himself.

Bella was sitting at a table off to the side, away from all of the commotion. I walked over to her table and sat down. I looked at her. She looked at me.

"We just can't win, can we?" She asked, not making eye contact with me.

"Bella, I know we have a good amount of things to talk about and I…"I started, but she cut me off before I could continue.

"Edward, as you can see, none of that is going to happen here." she chuckled. "Besides, I need to go to campus for a little while today and do some research for my comparative studies paper."

_Fucking hell._

"I could always give you a ride if you wanted to hang out a little before you do that. It's raining cats and dogs out there anyway."

We both looked out of the window and, sure enough, the rain was coming down hard from out of nowhere.

"No, I'd love to, but if I stay much longer, I'll never go. Plus the rain should be passing soon. It's supposed to be nice out." She said.

I knew this was the case, I had caught the weather and I remembered my own college days well, but I didn't want to see her go. Pride, however, seemed to be the name of this new game. Not wanting to look like the punk that I was starting to feel like, I figured it would be best to hold onto what little dignity I had left and not argue with her.

"Ok, just be careful."

"Ok." She whispered.

She got up and zipped up her opened hoodie.

"I'm gonna try and track Alice down before I leave."

I nodded and she wandered off to begin her search.

Emmett had found the song that he was looking for and the slow, mellow, and completely appropriate words of Luther Vandross came pouring through the speakers like molasses.

'_Let me hold you tight, if only for one night. _

_Let me keep you near to ease away your fear. _

_It would be so nice, if only for one night.'_

"Emmett, you jackass, that's Luther. I thought you were trying to say that the Isley Brothers were better than Teddy P?" I yelled over the music, trying to keep my mind from going haywire at the implications of the song on what I felt at that very moment.

"I know, I know," he yelled back, "but who in the world could beat Luther Vandross?"

And he was right, nobody could beat Luther Vandross in the panty dropping department. _Nobody._ That man didn't even like panties.

'_I won't tell a soul._

_No one has to know_

_if you want to be totally discreet._

_I'll be at your side, if only for one night.'_

"Fine, Emmett, you win. Victory is yours." Jasper said.

"I know I do! I'm the absolute best! Just ask my girl!"

At this point, I was totally done.

Another chance and several other perfect opportunities today had passed me by and instead of just taking the bull by the horns, I had wussed out completely. I was so frustrated with myself that I figured I would stay behind once everyone had left, do some paperwork up in my office and wallow in my own self pity.

Bella rounded the corner of the archway after finding Alice finishing things up in the women's dressing room. Like I had done so many times before, I swallowed my regret and looked Bella dead in the face, wishing she could read my mind and all of the things running through it.

"Have a good day then, Bella. I'll see you later." I said, hoping I was hiding the lump in my throat well enough.

"You too, Edward."

She looked up at me with an expression that I wasn't familiar with, stared at me for a moment and left.

I closed the door behind her, leaning up against it and closing my eyes tightly. No mention of talking about things later, no plans made to call or text or anything. She was just gone.

Emmett walked past me, shaking his head and heading towards the kitchen.

"Fucking brutal man."

_No shit…_

I stopped at the bar to get the receipts from last night. I could go through all of those and have that situated before going back to my house to do more damn laundry. I got to the staircase and thought better of it. I may as well grab Jasper. If we do it together the first time, maybe my OCD won't be the reason we have to do it a second time.

I put my papers and things on the bottom step to find him.

Before I could take any steps, a sopping wet Bella stood in the archway.

We both stood stock still, staring at each other for what could have been several minutes, or several hours, I couldn't be sure.

"Do you remember what you said to me on the rooftop?"

I looked around, several people were still buzzing around the place.

"I said a lot of things on the rooftop, Bella."

She shifted from one foot to the other, working through her nerves.

"You said that I was strong. You said that I'm not as closed off as I think I am. You said that I was what you get after a piece of coal is put through stress and strain, that I was that diamond. I want to be those things, Edward. I want you to see a pearl when you look at me. I'm ashamed of how I acted last night. I don't own you, but I pushed that girl like I did, like I had some power of you. Like you were mine."

I cocked my head to the side as I looked at her, absorbing her words. I had processed her thoughts, I even understood what she was saying, but only one thought ran through my head right then.

"But Bella, that's what I've been trying to get you to see all of this time. You _are_ those things and I _am_ yours. At least, that's what I want to be."

Before I knew what was happening, _my_ Bella had run across the bar and launched herself at me, wrapping her legs around my waist as I caught her, cupping her delicious ass in my hands.

I was still attempting to find the right words, there was still so much to talk about, but she put her tiny finger up to my lips, stopping all of my thoughts before they had a chance to interrupt us, again.

"Shut up and kiss me, Edward…."

And I did.

_And it was beautiful. _

_And spectacular._

The curve of her soft lips finally moving in time with mine was pure magic. We hung onto one another like our lives, our very access to the oxygen that we needed in order to breathe, depended on it. She was in my arms and this time, I wasn't letting her go.

You could hear all of the cheers and whistles from the people around us, clapping and urging us on.

I think Emmett may have been the loudest.

"Whoop whoop! It's about fucking time!"

We kissed in that spot until we both needed to breathe.

"Is that what you came up with when you thought about things like I asked you to last night?"

I thought about it for a moment.

"The ending is similar, but getting there was a whole hell of a lot easier."


	14. A Love of Your Own

**Long A/N:**

**An apology wouldn't even come close to what I owe you guys…. **

**I've honestly been trying to take steps to be a better writer and to bring you guys a better story. Not sure if it did much good, but it resulted in a long and unexpected delay in my posting.**

I would like to thank **Miss Penny Lane** with Sparkly Red Pen for her expertise as a beta and to **Mimi **for hers as a pre-reader, also with Sparkly Red Pen. Big thanks to both of you ladies for your assistance and the self less giving of your time and attention with this chapter.

I appreciate you both.

**To Sunflower3759: **

What could I possibly say? You have been an unexpected and pleasant bright spot in what would have been another dark and murky time experience in the fandom.

You are my sunflower, through and through.

This chapter is yours, bb.

Xs and Os.

**As per usual…**

Quotes, images, songs, and lyrics belong to their respective writers and/or artists.

Sadly enough, I _don't_ own anything related to Twilight. I _do_ own my original characters and my original story. No copyright infringement is intended.

Hate it or love it…let me know. Matter of fact, tell a friend! I won't mind!

**This is a short chapter for transitions sake. Don't fret…the next one is already in the can. :o)**

**Chapter 14 – A Love of Your Own**

_The sooner you give, the sooner you get to have a love of your own. _

_The longer it takes, the better you come to know a love of your own._

– _Average White Band_

**BPOV**

Kissing him may have been the absolute best thing in the world.

His lips were full and soft, molding to mine perfectly as I found myself pressing harder, willing him to tighten his hold on me. I nipped at his bottom lip, seeking entrance. He obliged, and our tongues seemed to battle for dominance before they realized that fighting wasn't necessary, not anymore. Now, they were on the same team.

"Um…guys?" A little voice whispered from below.

We didn't stop.

"Hello-o? I know you hear me. You _do_ realize that everybody is here, right?"

I took that moment to tug on his top lip as he groaned his appreciation.

"Go away, Alice," he mumbled from between my kisses.

She huffed loudly, and I could feel his cheeky grin as we kept right on making out in front of everyone.

"Listen," Alice said as she stomped into the kitchen. "No one is happier than I am to see you guys finally working things out, but you've got everybody blushing now, seriously," she said.

Edward pulled his head back and looked at me with mischief shining brightly in his eyes.

"I guess we _have_ given them some drama to start their day off, huh?"

I could feel the flush making its way over my body.

"Yeah. In addition to the drama they got to witness last night, I suppose we have."

He set me back on the ground with one last long, lingering, luxurious peck on the lips.

"To be continued," he whispered seductively into my ear.

I almost stopped breathing as the fire in his expression told me that he meant every word he said.

He took me by the hand, and we walked back over to our table. The idea of spending the day with Edward instead of making the trek to campus was tempting, but I couldn't put off studying today. He hadn't even asked, but it was what I wanted. I could only hope that, after the last few minutes, spending some time alone with me would be as high up on his agenda as it was on mine.

I never thought we would end up the way that we had, wrapped around each other for the world to see, but we did and I was relieved. Ecstatic. I was proud of how I took control of my feelings, despite the public setting. I thought public displays would always weird me out after Riley, but - this longing, this indescribable need for Edward could no longer be denied. No matter how much I didn't want to believe it - I didn't want to need somebody else. I wasn't ready to have my feelings back in the hands of another - but, for him, I was willing; I was willing to try.

The way that he still held tightly onto my hand, even as we were sitting across from each other at the tiny table, told me that he felt the same.

"I really do need to get to campus before it gets too late," I said, breaking the silence that hovered between us.

He sighed, brushing his fingers along my knuckles, leaving tingles in their wake. That ever present spark lingered under the pad of his thumb. His touch was always so gentle, yet wildly electric.

"I wish you didn't. I'd love to take you out to brunch or something."

I smiled weakly, knowing that I was once again the reason that things weren't going to go the way they should have gone.

"That would be nice," I said as I looked at him, long and hard. "Edward, I need you to know that I'm so sorry for how difficult things have been. I know that I'm not an easy person to get to know – but – it's just hard for me. It's hard for me to trust blindly."

He got up and walked over to my side of the table, kneeling in front of me as he pulled my chin up, so I looked at him instead of the floor.

"Hey, no more apologizing, ok? Trust me, I know."

We both chuckled at the pun.

"In all seriousness though, blind trust is a lot to ask for, but- I'd like to think we know each other well enough by now that it's not exactly blind, right?"

He looked up at me with a wide grin, willing me to agree with him.

I shook my head and smiled. _He was right. _We had gotten to know each other on a level that spoke of how much we had actually grown to like each other as people. That had to make moving into something more intimate easier, right? As excited as I was at the prospect, the butterflies banging up against the sides of my gut told me something else.

He stood up and kissed me soundly, taking my hand back into his as he sat down again.

"I'll tell you what - I'll suffer while you go to campus and take care of your studies under the condition that you promise to let me make you dinner tonight at my place."

I pretended to think it over for a minute.

"Can you cook?"

The way his face lit up with laughter told me that it didn't matter. _Not one bit._

"Don't you worry about that! Just know that you'll be satisfied and you'll be happy."

I rubbed the back of his hand with my thumb this time.

"I'd love to have dinner with you tonight, Edward."

Emmett walked up behind him, placing his meaty paws on his shoulders.

"Dinner tonight? That sounds awesome!"

He then turned his head, yelling at the top of his lungs.

"Hey, you guys want to meet at Edward's house for dinner later?"

We both shouted at the same time - "No!"

Emmett looked between us with a smirk on his baby face, nodding his approval.

"Well, fucking A! Glad to see you dorks finally speaking up for yourselves. You just might make it after all."

_That seemed to be a running theme here._

I couldn't be too mad at him for almost wrecking another date for Edward and I, though. If it weren't for Emmett, Edward and I would still be tiptoeing around one another. I'd have to find a special way to show him how grateful I was for all of his support.

I hopped up from my seat, a spring in my step for some reason, and Edward stood up to walk me to the door, shaking his head at his goofball friend.

"I'll be a few hours, but I'll call you when I finish up," I said.

I felt like I wanted to cry at that moment. Leaving Edward right then was the hardest thing I ever had to do but, duty called.

"I'll be waiting for your call," he said, winding his arms around my waist and pulling me in close. "We're going to do this the right way, Bella Swan."

This time he kissed me slow. Then he kissed me deep. I was two seconds away from saying fuck the research paper as my fingers found their way back into his messy head of hair. That is, until I felt myself being pulled away by two strong pairs of arms.

"Don't worry Edward, we'll get her back to you in one piece!" Rose yelled from over her shoulder.

"Bella, don't you dare go giving my brother the milk before he's bought the cow," Alice chided quietly.

"Hey!"

_I may have had a little junk in my trunk, but I was no cow._

"Shush, you know what I mean."

They were literally carrying me out to the Beetle…

xx_C_xx

We double backed to the apartment so we could grab our books and laptops. Alice already had her things stowed away in the car. Rose had a meeting with some of her classmates for a group project in her Manufacturing Technologies class and Alice had a paper due for her Marketing Co-op, so they joined me on my trip to campus.

"I don't even know why I'm meeting with them! I end up carrying all of the weight on these fricking things anyway," Rose griped as we made our way across the quad towards University Library.

"I'm really surprised by that. I would have _never_ thought Engineers were lazy like that," I said.

"Please believe it. All of them aren't lazy, per se, but even the ones that think they're trying don't pay enough attention to detail, at least not for my tastes."

She even flipped her hair over her shoulder for emphasis.

"Rose, that's not fair, you're a perfectionist."

She suddenly stopped walking.

"So?"

"So? So, you should cut the rest of the world some slack some times."

We'd had this conversation more times than I could count, but Rosalie always stuck to her guns when it came to her drive. She was even more stubborn when we were talking about her determination. She didn't want to just be one of the few females to finish the program. No, Rosalie Hale wanted to be one of the best Engineers to come out of Northwestern, period.

"_Lazy, good for nothing, shiftless, mouth breathing…" _She mumbled under her breath the rest of the way while Alice and I just giggled behind her.

When we arrived, Rose went to find the reserved study room where her group was meeting while Alice and I found a nice, quiet table in the corner of a room on the second floor to spread out at and get comfortable. I had just started to put my ear buds in when I realized that she was staring at me.

"What?"

"Hmm?"

"What? Why are you staring at me?"

"Oh, I didn't realize that I was."

I shrugged and started booting up my laptop. The little imp was still looking.

"Ohmigod, if you don't just spit it out!"

She laughed.

"I'm sorry, I really am, but, I don't know. You're kind of glowing."

My face flamed up immediately.

"Alice," I started, but she cut me off.

"No, really, you are. I'm so glad that you and my brother stopped fighting this."

She reached across the table and covered my hand with hers, showing me that this wasn't about teasing me this time. She was being sincere.

"I know you've been hurt before, but Edward really is a good man," she said.

She paused for a moment, as if she wanted to find the right words to say to me.

"Bella, you are one of my very best friends. You are a terrific person and I love you. You both have so much to offer and I've seen with my own eyes how people have only taken that for granted so far. I think you made the right choice by giving him a shot and I think you two will make each other really, really happy."

I didn't have any response to what she had just said to me. I fought the tears that were welling up behind my eyes, but there was no way to stop a few rogue ones from spilling down my cheeks. This had already been such an emotional day and it was still early in the afternoon.

"Damn it, Alice," I pulled at my eyelash, feigning as if one had fallen into my eye.

I got up and went around to her side of the table, hugging her as hard as I could. After a few moments, I went back to my seat and Alice pulled on a pair of reading glasses. We wiped our tears, ignored the questioning looks that our peers around us were giving us and got down to business.

xx_C_xx

After a few hours of researching, typing and producing a damn good paper if I did say so myself, my fingertips were itching to dial a certain someone's phone number. The only things stopping me were the butterflies that were still relentlessly pounding away at my insides with their pretty little flapping wings and my own self doubt.

_I can't believe we're really doing this…_

That thought had been marching around in my brain as I did my best to stay focused on my task. I had come too far to let my work ethic take a plunge now, not when I was so close to the light at the end of the tunnel. I still had a nice chunk of time ahead of me, but I was extremely proud of what I had accomplished so far. I was doing well at maintaining my GPA amidst my work duties and my reemerging social calendar, so I knew that my concerns about school were just a cover-up to my real fear. I was opening up again to a man that had the potential to utterly destroy me.

_I doubted my ability to love like I hadn't been hurt before._

Love was a strong word - Edward and I had yet to have a conversation about any of this, but I knew in my heart of hearts that I was already head over heels for him. The word itself was merely a technicality at this point. That fact alone had me scared shitless. Pair that with the extremely public shows of emotion that I had made over the last twelve hours or so, first in my altercation with Gianna and then this morning at the bar – and my mind was completely scattered and covered.

"Just do it already."

I looked up from my computer screen to see Rose plop down in the seat beside Alice.

"You've been rubbing on that phone since I came out of the study room. Just dial his number and call him. I'm sure you're both miserable heaps right now."

I looked down in my lap. I hadn't even realized that I had moved the phone there; my hand was placed squarely on the keypad.

"Shut up," I said, only slightly embarrassed.

"Hey, I'm on a roll. I've been barking orders at wannabe Engineers for hours now!"

She laughed without humor as she rubbed her face and attempted to wipe away her frustration from spending so much time with her classmates. She even tried putting her feet in Alice's lap, but Alice wasn't having any of it. She shoved them off with a loud, "Eww, Rose! You are spending too much damn time with Emmett!"

I chuckled and stepped away from the table, searching the contacts on my phone. I stopped and looked at his picture for a minute before I hit send. Thank God I did it before my nerves could get the better of me!

He answered halfway through the second ring.

"Hey," he said.

"Hi," I replied. I felt shy all of a sudden, wanting him to take the lead.

"Things go well with your paper?"

He sounded genuinely concerned about my work. That made me smile with happiness, even though I knew he couldn't see it.

"Yes, I did a decent job, I think. I'll need to do a few minor tweaks here and there and type up my bibliography before I turn it in, but I'm pretty much done."

"Good."

"Yeah, good…"

The awkward silence was starting to kill me.

"So…are you hungry?"

The timid way that he asked gave me a little confidence. He was nervous about all of this, too. Feeling bold, I told him exactly what I was thinking, hoping he would pick up on the double entendre.

"Like you wouldn't believe."

I could feel my heartbeat, as well as my anticipation, moving up several notches.

"How about I come pick you up? I need to stop by the grocery store to get some supplies for dinner anyway."

"That would be nice, but I could always have Alice bring me by."

He was quiet for a minute.

"Well, whatever you think is best."

I had already put this man through the ringer. With gas prices as high as they were, I could do him a solid and have the pixie take me uptown. I was sure she wouldn't mind.

"Why don't I do that? We're wrapping up here and that way, you don't have to go to any extra trouble."

Alice and Rose had gathered their things and were headed towards me. We started walking to the front door of the library. I balanced the phone and checked my own bag to make sure I hadn't left anything behind.

"Ok. I guess I'll see you in a little bit then."

"Alright. I'll see you in a few."

We made our way down the steps of the building. I hoped I had imagined the slight disappointment that I heard in his tone. That would make my batting average for the day pretty shitty.

"Alice, do you think you could drop me off at your brother's house? Alice?"

After a moment of silence, I looked up to see why she hadn't answered me.

"I don't think that'll be necessary, Bells."

"What do you mean?" I asked as I followed her and Rose's gaze.

Sitting in the faculty parking lot was Edward and that fuck hot Mustang of his. He sat on the hood of the car, phone in hand, engine still running.

**EPOV**

"Sorry, it was a little too nippy out for me to put the top down," I said by way of greeting.

I stood up from the hood of my car, wanting to meet my girl properly.

Well, she wasn't technically my girl yet, but we were still working out the semantics.

"I'm in shorts, Edward." She giggled. It turned into a squeal as I scooped her up, eager to have my hands on her again.

"Yes," I nodded, checking out the curve of her hips and the heavenly length of her legs. I allowed my hands to settle a little lower than I would normally consider appropriate in public. "Yes you are, indeed."

Any apprehension that I had felt throughout the course of the day melted away when I had her in my arms again. I kissed her passionately and with no regard to the audience that we had. I had never been one for big, public displays.

This was the second time today and I still didn't care.

"Jesus, Edward," Rosalie said, evidently the new head of the peanut gallery.

I pulled away reluctantly, not wanting to remove my eyes from Bella's for too long.

"My apologies, ladies, but I'm sure you understand."

I opened the door, and Bella slid in after she shook the mental cobwebs off. I was glad to see that I hadn't lost my touch due to lack of practice. She waved to Rosalie and my sister as I got into the driver's seat and whipped out of the parking lot.

We made our way to the freeway in relative silence aside from the low tunes that I had playing in the car. I could only hope that Bella didn't find it strange that I was listening to Average White Band. I couldn't seem to get it out of my head all day.

"That was quite a pleasant surprise, Mr. Cullen."

"Was it?" I asked.

She had to know that this waiting around was a struggle. Jasper and Emmett seemed to work in tandem while they teased me and gave me advice while we finished up at Clarity. After we had finished all of the cleaning, we drank a few beers and relaxed. I even played the piano for a little while. I was grateful for the help that my friends had given me; that was for certain, but Bella and I had significant things to hash out. After all of this time spent waiting and wanting and wishing, I just wanted to get this show on the road. The clock had not been my friend at all.

She giggled again. "Uhh…yeah. We had just talked about getting Alice to drop me off. I was trying to give you an easy option…especially seeing as how I've managed to make everything else fairly difficult up to now."

I shifted gears and looked over at her. She genuinely looked sad, almost regretful, shouldering the burden of how we had gotten to this point all on her own. I couldn't allow that to continue.

"Listen to me," I said, hoping that I didn't come off as harsh, but wanting to get my point across. "This is uncharted territory for me, and I imagine that it's the same for you. I asked you to my place for dinner so that we could have a chance to unwind together and speak privately without any outside interference. We've come a long way, and I'd like for us to talk openly and honestly about everything. That includes our pasts _and_ our future…together. Only if, that's what you want, of course. I know that I do."

I looked at her expectantly, waiting for an answer or some sort of acknowledgement that we were on the same page. I had even worded that last part in a way that would draw some of that snark and smart-assery that I had come to love and expect from her…

_Nothing._

I'd be lying if I said that I wasn't concerned. While her small smile was beautiful, I had hoped for more of a reply. This morning's breakthrough was quickly starting to lose some of its luster, and I wasn't exactly sure why. I'd be damned if I was going to just sit here and watch all of our progress go out the window.

I laughed a little to myself as I turned up the volume. That was big talk for somebody that had no other choice but to sit here and watch. _I'm the damn driver._

I reached over and grabbed her hand into mine. I couldn't seem to stop touching her. But she didn't say anything about it and I didn't either. We stayed like that all the way to the Fox and Hound Gourmet Market while AWB sang about finding a love of their own.

"What's on the list?" Bella asked as we walked through the doors, immediately hit by the bright lighting.

Even from the front of the store, it was overwhelming. Normally, I would have taken the time to plan a trip like this, but today I found myself with a bit of an attention deficit like Emmett has most of the time. I liked to think that I was a decent cook when I found the time to do it, but with a schedule as busy as mine had become since opening the bar, cooking for myself had become a rare treat reserved mostly for special occasions. This just happened to be one of them.

It was enough to make me blush from embarrassment as I watched the look she was giving me as _she _waited for a response this time.

"Uh, I didn't really make a list."

Her eyes grew wide.

I rubbed the back of my neck.

"What? Edward Cullen didn't make a list? How do you plan on shopping without one? I would have bet my pinkie finger that someone as organized as you would make a list to shop from."

I honestly thought she was disappointed in me until she quietly started chuckling to herself.

I picked her up and swung her small frame closer to the shopping carts.

"I'll have you know that I had other, more important things on my mind this morning besides making a shopping list."

"Hmm," was her only response as she pulled one of the carts out and started pushing. "I suppose that answer will do."

We made our way past the gifts and floral department into the massive produce section.

"So what's on the menu tonight, Chef Cullen?"

I had to laugh because she was _so damn funny_ today. At least she was when she was talking to me. At this point, I was grateful for what I could get.

"I never claimed to be a chef, Ms. Smartass. But, since you ask, I don't really know. What would you like?"

She thought about it for a minute, pausing in front of the bagged spinach and salad mixes.

"I actually had an idea. How do you feel about Italian?"

I smirked at her. "I love Italian, but you know that already. Remember that time we all went to Luigi's?"

Recollection dawned on her face.

"Damn, how could I ever forget? Emmett was sick as a dog after eating way too many stuffed shells!"

We both enjoyed a laugh at Emmett's expense.

"Well, Rose and I have an old staple that we've been making since high school. I think you might like it, especially since I don't know what your preferences are."

"Yet," I corrected her.

She nodded as her cheeks flamed up. She was so adorable, even when she was trying to give me a hard time.

"Anyway, we call it 'The Trifecta.' She and I have extremely different tastes when it comes to Italian food. She loves tomato sauce while I prefer alfredo or butter sauces, that sort of thing. Anyway, we get some ziti or some other pasta. We load it down with cheese and three different types of sauce – tomato, alfredo and pesto - since we could never agree on just one. After a few attempts, we found a balance and decided that we loved it. Even Charlie admitted that he liked it when we made it for him."

I tried to picture this creation of hers and gave up, figuring this would be a terrific first chance to show her that I trusted her.

"Alright, I'm game. Where should we start?"

"Well," she said. "Since neither one of us is a top chef, we usually start in the sauce aisle."

I tried to hide my grin, but I don't think I did a good job. I was happy that, even after the few months of knowing her, there were still things that I didn't know. What made me even happier was that she was willing to share mundane, personal things like this recipe that she and Rose had created as kids. I suddenly couldn't wait to make it with her.

"Let's go," I said as I nudged her further into the abyss.

We headed down the aisle that was fully stocked with any and every type of sauce that you could ever dream of putting on a noodle. That was a good thing since it sounded as if we would need one of each. Bella grabbed a bottle of each kind, selecting her brands carefully.

Once we got to the pasta aisle, a box of multicolored radiatori caught my eye. They were weird looking among the spaghetti and linguini and lasagna noodles, so I thought they'd be perfect. I grabbed the box, looking over the circular pasta pieces and their mixture of green and orange and tan colors. I held it up to get her opinion.

"You catch on fast," she said, nodding and winking at me. "We had to make it with plain old macaroni once because that's all that Charlie had in the cabinet. From that day on, we made it with the strangest shapes we could find."

She took the box and tossed it into the basket.

We trolled through the dairy aisle, picking up several different shredded cheeses before heading back to the produce to grab onions, mushrooms, and bell peppers. The butcher shop is where we had our first official spat, unable to agree on whether we should have chicken breast or steak with the pasta. We finally decided that we'd get one of each since she wanted chicken and I wanted a ribeye.

We stopped off in the extensive wine section to grab a couple bottles of both red and white wine. After that, we went back and forth about dessert. We finally agreed to get something from the bakery in case one of us had a sweet tooth after dinner tonight. But only after she promised to bake me some of the famous brownies I had heard so much about from Rosalie and Alice. Soon!

Finally, we swung past the frozen food aisle to grab a box of Texas Toast.

_Jasper would be so proud._

After about an hour in the grocery store, I was more than ready to get the evening started.

"I bet you never realized you could learn so much about a person by shopping for groceries with them, did you?" She asked, looking up at me from under those long, dark lashes of hers.

_This shy business was going to be the death of me._

It took all that I had to not pick her up and lay her across that conveyor belt and do unspeakable things in order for her to talk to me. I just wanted her to be, well, to just be her. Something told me that Marge, at least that was what her name tag said, would totally disapprove.

I stood and watched as Marge scanned our items. Bella flipped through some of the tabloids looking cool and collected, beautiful and innocent. I hoped I looked as comfortable as she did, but I knew that I was a total wreck on the inside.

Tonight would be a pivotal point for us, in our relationship. Tonight could undoubtedly be the start of something. We could try to give a name to this overwhelming pull between us, or give it a rational definition and make the decision to remain friends. The possibilities were numerous; _endless._ That created an uncertainty that made me nervous, plain and simple.

After paying and loading the bags into the trunk, we were back on the freeway, headed uptown to my place. My mind was running a mile a minute while the cruise control kept us going at the speed limit. At that moment, I wished I had a cruise control button for my nerves. They took a firm grip on me as I settled in for the ride to come.


	15. Kisses Don't Lie

I would like to thank **Miss Penny Lane** with Sparkly Red Pen for her expertise as a beta and to **Mimi **for hers as a pre-reader, also with Sparkly Red Pen. Big ups to you ladies!

An extra special thank you goes out to** Sunflower3759. **Your way with words and the way you brought organization to my thoughts is an inspiration to me!

You brought _**clarity**_ to this chapter and I'd be lost without you.

To round out the love, I want to thank for keeping me focused and grounded with her honesty. This one's for you love!

**As per usual…**

Quotes, images, songs, and lyrics belong to their respective writers and/or artists.

Sadly enough, I _don't_ own anything related to Twilight. I _do_ own my original characters and my original story. No copyright infringement is intended.

Hate it or love it…let me know. Matter of fact, tell a friend! I won't mind!

**Chapter 15 – Kisses Don't Lie**

"_**The truth is, everyone is going to hurt you. You just got to find the ones worth suffering for."**_

– _**Bob Marley**_

**EPOV**

We pulled up in front of my place and just sort of sat there.

As we approached the I-94 exit the tension had mounted, and the magnitude of the situation had taken hold of us both. By the time we made it to Lake Shore Drive, I had to roll the window down just to let out some of the built up pressure. Bella's fidgeting was relentless, and I was holding onto the steering wheel so tightly, my knuckles had turned white. This was it. We were here, so I plastered a smile on my face and hoped that this wasn't a preview of the night that we were in for.

"Well, I don't know about you, but I'm starved. You want to help me carry the bags up?"

She nodded, and I popped the trunk.

We didn't have many bags, so I gave her the lighter ones and took my key out of my pocket to unlock the door. I could feel a knot in the pit of my stomach, felt like the bottom had fallen out of it. I was wired and excited but weary from all of these weeks and months spent pining over Bella and what could be. Now that the time had come, I couldn't shake the fear that maybe I had built this up too much in my own head.

_Damn, I wish I could shake this._

Bella didn't strike me as the type that was turned on solely by the thrill of the chase. What if she had changed her mind now that the cat and mouse part of the game we were playing had come to an end? What if we were both disappointed now that we had come to the crossroads together? Don't get me wrong, _I_ was still sure, more than anything, but I felt the distinct weight of apprehension from my toes to my hairline.

I had been fighting it all day. Images of the times we'd spent together over the last couple of months moved through my mind at hyper speed, but I wasn't able to pinpoint the little things. I wanted to find out what made her tick, to become familiar with all of her nuances and subtleties, but I couldn't do that until we went further. I wanted the details. Hell, I needed them! I wanted to get into her mind and really know _Bella_. Right now, as we stood in front of my door, we were nothing but perfect strangers.

_I can't believe we're really doing this…_

That was the soundtrack banging around in my head. As I stepped back and watched her take a tentative step inside my door, I felt like I didn't know her at all. And now, she would barely even look at me. One of the things about Bella that drew me in was her wit. Her quick mind was always thinking, and she was always a step ahead of the crowd. She usually had a quote or a reference at the ready for any and every situation, but she had been as quiet as a church mouse since I picked her up. We talked while we were in the store, but that was all for the sake of utility. It was as if we were starting all over again.

She was here, and I prayed it was because she was still interested in the _possibilities_. The actuality of this silence, though, was stifling. It fueled all of my doubts and heightened each of my insecurities. I couldn't help but think that those magnificent possibilities may have been exhausted already. Maybe they had already reached their crescendo and would fizzle out into nothing? That thought was enough to let the adrenaline from the morning wear off and evaporate. Outside of my show of masculinity on campus this afternoon, I was all out of ideas for the night.

Bella was wandering around as I meandered through both my thoughts and our grocery bags, putting things away where they needed to go. My hands were starting to feel clammy, and my brow was starting to sweat. Fear can be a real son of a bitch when it wants to be.

_Relax, Cullen. Stay fucking calm._

I could practically hear Jasper in my head, laughing like an asshole, calling me a pussy. I watched Bella cautiously. She seemed oblivious to my presence as she ran her small, delicate hands over my things. She looked at my pictures with those dark, expressive eyes. She kept that juicy bottom lip of hers trapped in between her teeth as she read the book spines that lined my shelves. Her curiosity and interest was sexy as all hell.

_Like she needed something else to make her attractive to me._

While my mind was attempting to make sense of everything, my body had started to respond in a way that always made sense.

_Maybe I'm over-thinking things? Perhaps this uncharted territory simply has us both off of our game?_

Very rarely was my dick the voice of reason. Suddenly feeling like a creepy stalker, I shook off the familiar haze and tried to make myself look busy. We couldn't exactly have a clear, unbiased conversation if I was hard throughout the whole damn thing. I could have just pulled a Clarke Gable and kissed her again, but I didn't want our night to be about that. _Not all of it anyway_. I was starting to get hungry, so I set out some veggies and other snacks in case she was, too. I adjusted myself on the sly and went to work, not knowing how long it would take to cook dinner. Wine goblets would be next, then maybe I'd put out the unused place settings that Mom bought…

"This is beautiful, Edward," she said softly, interrupting my train of thought.

I looked up, noticing that she had stopped off by the fireplace.

"You like it?" I asked. I hadn't brought many people up here, so I wasn't used to getting compliments on it.

"It's very…you," she giggled as she moved towards the stereo, perusing the rows and rows of CDs that were displayed. "It's a bachelor's pad, obviously; but it's different."

My eyebrow raised in question.

"Is that different in a good way or different in a bad way?" I asked as I took a few pots out, setting them on the stove. I figured we'd need a few of them before the night was out. I had to admit; I was curious as to where she was going with this. While I'm admitting things, I was also interested in hearing about whatever had gotten her to come out of her shell.

"I'm not sure yet," she said, continuing to finger through the shelves, pausing whenever something caught her eye. "I shouldn't really be surprised, though. You seem to be unique when it comes to most things."

I popped an olive into my mouth and gave her what I hoped was a sexy smirk, "I'm listening."

She selected a disc, placed it in the stereo, and pressed play. A moment later, the sounds of Duke Ellington's "In a Sentimental Mood" filled the room at a low, sultry volume.

"Well," she paused thoughtfully. "You're sort of quiet and just a little bit shy when you want to be. And you're fairly easy to look at."

She moved away from my music and walked towards me at a torturously slow pace. As she made her way across the expanse of my hardwood floor, my very breath was drawn from my body at the change in her entire demeanor. _I was a warm, lightly buttered slice of toast._ My dick was screaming at me to let him out, so he could give her a proper tour of the place, but my mind wanted to see what she was up to.

I straightened my posture and laid my previously sweaty hands flat on the counter in front of me as I absorbed her flawless form, her unintentional sexuality coming closer to me. She concentrated as she spoke, being careful with her wording.

"Once you decide to open up and give people a peek inside that head of yours, you're incredibly captivating and funny. You're patient and understanding. You're a terrific listener, and you give expert advice. You're almost 'sage' in your wisdom.

We both laughed out loud at that.

"No, really. You're like an old soul wrapped up in a young gentleman's body!"

"So, I'm a young gentleman, huh? Am I truly that old fashioned?" I asked, already knowing the answer.

She sat down on one of the bar stools across from where I stood.

"Not in every way, just in some."

I nodded because she was right. "Well, in my defense, I've tried to be as much of a gentleman as my mother raised me to be."

She started to nibble on that damn bottom lip again.

_Shit._

"I'm very sure she would approve."

I leaned in, slightly encroaching on her personal space.

"Do _you_ approve?"

She leaned over the counter, closing the gap between us. She grazed my lips with hers, barely allowing them to touch. "I must say, it _is_ an attractive quality."

She sat there, looking me over with her hands folded under her chin. Somehow, the sweetest little smile had taken over her face again. This time, it wasn't in place of something that she wanted to say, but chose not to. This time, it was for real. And just like that, no longer was the mood in the room darkening, along with the setting of the sun as it just a few moments ago. Her smile…it lit up the room. No, that's not right. It lit up my _world_!

"Separately, those things could all be considered to be fairly common. But when you put them all together the way that they are; all wrapped up and tied together inside and outside of _you_? That makes for an intriguing package, don't you think?"

I was in awe of her. She was taking the steps that we needed so desperately right now. We sat on the precipice of defining our roles in each others' lives and, somehow, she had found the courage that I couldn't seem to. She took the initiative and, in a matter of seconds, turned this thing around by putting her unbelievably sexy self out there.

_For us._

Emmett's words from earlier in the day echoed in my mind. I couldn't help but smile back at her as I repeated them out loud. I wanted to say it in a way that, just maybe, we could both understand without the white noise of other people and insecurity swirling around us.

"We just _might_ make it after all, huh?"

She beamed, bright and clear and all _Bella_.

I leaned over and kissed her again; partly because I had been dying to touch her, but mostly because I wanted to seal this deal. I kept it chaste. You might even say I kept it old fashioned. At this point, I couldn't really give a shit, but I made sure to make it count.

I beamed right back at her, ready to redo the last hour and a half that I'd wasted.

"Would you like a glass of wine or something?"

xx_C_xx

We worked together at the stove, boiling and simmering, laughing and teasing. By the time we finished, we had two steaming plates piled high with some truly delicious pasta. After toasting the garlic bread and pouring a few more glasses of wine from our second bottle, we were ready to take our plates out onto my small patio.

Since we couldn't agree on a protein at the store, we had made a compromise. I cooked up both my steak and her chicken out here on the grill while she put the finishing touches on her 'Frankenstein' sauce. From now on, that was the name that I would use for it. She promptly snapped me in the ass with a dish towel when I told her so.

"Your little hibachi grill is pretty cool," she said as she took another sip of her wine.

"Alice actually bought me this as a housewarming gift when I moved in. Works well since it's usually just me."

She hummed in response.

"I've never lived by myself. Do you ever get lonely?"

I considered the question for a moment.

"I wouldn't exactly call it lonely. I've always been a bit of an introvert, so I've never been afraid to be inside my own head for extended periods. When I moved in here, solitude was exactly what I wanted. You could say I needed my own space to re-evaluate a few things."

"How did that go? The evaluation, I mean," she asked.

I choked a bit, but I recovered quickly. I should have anticipated her question, but I hadn't considered she'd be interested in my hermit tendencies.

"I would say it's gone well. I still have a few things I'm working on, but its gone better than I thought it would."

I didn't see the need to tell her that she was a deciding factor into how my hypothesis would play out in the end.

We both relaxed in the recliners, letting the night air surround us. We still had a full agenda of things to discuss, but the silence wasn't at all as uncomfortable as it had been earlier. The atmosphere around us was calm, but buzzing at the same time.

"Tell me something?" I asked.

She swallowed down her last bite of food. "What would you like to know?"

I reached across the small table between us and tugged on her hand. I pulled her up from her seat and coaxed her into mine. Once she realized what I wanted, she settled in between my legs and I wrapped my arms around her. I loved how it felt so natural to just 'be' when I was with her. We had fought against it for so long that I simply wanted to test it out, again.

_Yep, still perfect._

She curled up into me and pressed her cheek into my chest.

"What's your favorite color?" I asked.

She snorted. "Green. Yours?"

"I have two: Green and Brown. Chocolate brown, to be exact."

"What's your favorite movie?" She asked, catching onto my game.

"That would have to be '_Goodfellas_.' For as far back as I can remember; I always wanted to be a gangster. What about you?"

"That's such a typical choice for a guy. Mine would be '_Pretty Woman'_," she answered.

"Ha! And you call me typical?"

"What can I say? I _do_ want the fairytale."

The sound and feel of her breath catching stopped me in my tracks, like she had slipped up and said something that she hadn't meant to. In an effort to comfort her, I took that moment and loosened her ponytail, watching her hair fall around her shoulders in waves. I wanted her to know and feel that she could totally relax with me.

"You deserve the fairytale, Bella," I whispered softly, grazing her earlobe with my teeth. And she did. I would make it my personal mission to make sure she got it, too.

Her shiver was a tell tale sign that she enjoyed our close proximity as much as I did. She tried to hide her fluster by sitting up and taking a sip of her wine. "So, what's your favorite sport?"

_There's my Bella, changing the subject._

_I can roll with the punches, too._

"It's a tie. Football is my favorite to watch, but golf is remarkably serene," I said.

She chuckled while she poked my chest. "I told you. You're an old man in there."

"Ha ha. What about you?"

"I'd say I'm a little more non-traditional. I love to bowl, but paintball is my number one."

"Really? I wouldn't have pegged you for the violent type, Ms. Swan."

"Says the guy that loves _Goodfellas_? I learned how to shoot when I was young. Charlie wanted me to be able to handle myself and paintball was a safe way for me to practice in the town that I grew up in. It was very small, so there weren't too many other options aside from that and hunting. Besides, I didn't want to be the one to shoot Bambi's mom."

"I see. Have you ever had a pet? My mom only allowed us to have fish. Anything we thought would make a good pet, she thought was too messy."

She nodded.

"Charlie had a black lab named Buster. He was the best. He died shortly after I left for school, though."

"I'm so sorry to hear that, Bella."

"Don't be, he was old and happy. He lived a good life."

We asked each other a few more questions, all mundane in nature, but extremely entertaining and eye opening. We had plowed through all of the wine, and we weren't ready to call it a night just yet, so I brought out a few beers, a pitcher of water, and a soft, thick blanket.

As I sat back down, Bella reclaimed her spot like it was second nature. I moved a few loose strands of hair from her face. She thanked me with a small smile. The moonlight gave her a glow that I would never get tired of seeing. She belonged right here with me. I wanted more than anything to make sure she knew that.

"What do you think about Jasper and Alice together?" She asked, sipping from her bottle.

It was my turn to snort. "I think it's great if he doesn't fuck around and make me kill him."

We laughed, but I knew he knew better than to hurt my little sister.

"Seriously though, if they're happy together, I'm not going to be the one to stand in their way."

She looked at me thoughtfully and, at that moment, I knew the game was officially over.

"I want to know what makes _you_ happy, Bella."

She coughed a little on her beer before setting it aside, looking me square in the face.

"That's not really a question, now, is it?"

"Maybe not, but I really want to know."

She laid her head back down and we intertwined our fingers.

"Edward, I have no idea what makes me happy. I know that, right now, being with you makes me the happiest I've been in an awfully long time."

"I feel the same way," I whispered, bringing her knuckles to my lips and placing a kiss there.

I could feel her smile against my chest before she spoke again.

"I've been on a cloud all day, but I've got to be honest with you, I'm scared out of my mind. I'm terrified that I'm going to do or say something that's going to cause me to wake up, like this has all been a figment of my imagination."

_Jackpot!_

"So that's what's had you acting like the _Pink Panther_ with me?"

"Seriously?" she laughed.

"Hell yes! You've been moving in complete silence up until a little while ago. You had me terrified that you'd changed your mind about me. But tell me more. What's making you feel that way?" I asked.

_Pleaded was more like it._

She hesitated, and I could feel her heart rate picking up, but I wasn't going to interrupt her. I wanted her to get her fears out in the open; however she needed to. Once we tackled both hers and mine, we could move forward.

Finally, she let it all out.

"I'm a disaster at these things, Edward. A part of me is bursting at the seams to just let go and not worry so much, but the more and more I think about it, I know that I'm going to find a way to fuck it all up."

I started to interrupt her, just like I said I wouldn't, but she stopped me with a finger to my lips.

"I've always tried to fit the mold, so to speak. I've never been 'me' in a relationship. Not that I've had many, but I know that I've always focused on being who I thought I was _supposed_ to be. I started to become uncomfortable in my own skin. I know that I don't have it in me to do that anymore…definitely not with you."

I took it as a positive sign when she wrapped her arms around mine, allowing me to hold her even tighter.

"Edward, I feel things in ways for you that I never thought I could. It terrifies me that I could get comfortable and then have the rug pulled out from under me again. I don't think I could recover if it happened this time."

I kissed her on the forehead. My mind raced as I tried to find a way to soothe her fears, but time was the only thing that could do that. She had to learn to trust me the same way that I had to learn to trust her.

"I don't ever want you feeling uncomfortable, Bella, especially not with me. Besides, your skin is way too beautiful for you to not be comfortable in it."

She shook her head and leaned back into me.

"Look, none of this relationship stuff has been easy for either of us. You've done what you've felt you needed to do in the past as well as in the present. I've done the same. It's funny because, in a way, our fears are similar. If we're speaking openly, I'm tired of playing all these games. I just can't play them anymore.

She wiggled as if she were trying to get out of my grasp before I realized how that may have sounded to her.

"No, Bella, wait. Please don't misunderstand me. When I say that, I'm not talking about you. My last relationship was full of games that I _chose_ to play along with because I thought that was what I was supposed to do. I thought that kind of pettiness was necessary to get to the pay off of happiness and love in the end, but that wasn't the case. I never felt any of the things that I find myself feeling for you. Not once. I should have taken notice of that and recognized it for what it was. I can't blame anyone for that but myself. I was looking for something that the person I was with simply couldn't provide for me. I couldn't provide the things that she needed in a relationship, either."

"Plastic Boobs Barbie," she whispered, thinking I couldn't hear her.

I tried to ignore it, but it was hard to hold in my laughter.

"See, that's one of the things that I love most about spending time with you. I never know what you're thinking or what's going to come out of your mouth next."

She turned slightly to her side.

"My verbal filter seems to fall away when I'm with you."

"I'm glad," I said, kissing the tip of her nose. "What I'm trying to say is that it doesn't matter if it were easy or hard if it's _what_ and _who_ you want. Then it's all worth the effort. Bella, I meant what I said today about us doing this the right way. I'm grateful to have had this time to, not only meet you, but to get to know you. Now, I just want to know you _better_. I want a deeper understanding of your heart and your mind. I've never met anyone that I wanted that way. If things ever turn sour between us, I can guarantee you that I wouldn't recover from that."

The look in her eyes as she lifted them to meet mine made me shiver.

For just a moment, I thought she had reverted back into that shy girl that rode in my car, full of nerves and fear. When she wrapped her arms around my neck and pressed her soft, lush lips firmly and surely against mine, I knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that this was what I had been searching for.

No kiss had ever felt so perfect nor had one ever been so full of promise.

I kissed her back with equal force, running my fingers through her long, thick hair, caressing the back of her neck. She let her fingertips trail a path along my biceps and forearms, giving me goose bumps that I hadn't felt in forever.

It wasn't hurried or impatient like the kisses we shared in the bar this morning. This time, it felt more like we were officially declaring ourselves to one another. We were giving a definition to this thing.

When we broke apart, we were both panting. I irrationally blurted out the first thing that crossed my mind.

"I know you said I was a gentleman earlier, but I need you to know that that all goes out of the window the minute some fucker looks at you the wrong way. I don't share."

I couldn't help it. The idea of that had been bubbling up inside of me for weeks now.

She arched a brow at my random statement, but she caught on quickly to my line of thinking.

"It's funny that you should say that. I was starting to wonder when I might see _Sgt. Slaughter_ again."

_Oh really?_

"What'd you call me?" I asked in mock anger, tickling her sides until she yelled uncle.

I knew this was one of my nicknames at work. I even knew that she and Rosalie had dubbed it.

Once she caught her breath, I pulled her face back to mine; locking her lips in a searing kiss full of the passion and assurance that I hoped would drive my point home. I may be an asshole sometimes, but I was hers if she wanted me. Heated and full of pent up need, I felt the power of both sides of the same coin pulsating between us. This want for each other was obvious, but it was so much more to it than that. It was the mutual desire for something real.

She whispered against my lips as we reclined fully, wrapping ourselves around each other. Her knee slipped in between my legs, creating friction exactly where I needed it. I caressed along the curve of her back and settled around the bottom of her ass, relishing her perfect feminine form. I would never get enough of her.

"I know we need to slow this down, but my heart just won't listen. The way you touch me, Edward…I don't know. I can't even find the right words. I swear it feels like all of this is gonna crush me," she moaned.

Our teeth clashed with the force of our kisses as we tried to get impossibly closer. The heat of her flushed skin against my palm was overwhelming as I made my way under the sweatshirt she was wearing, ghosting over her succulent breasts. I could only imagine how warm and inviting other spots on her body would be right now.

I couldn't do anything to stop my groan from slipping out at that moment.

"Bella," I mumbled. "I feel everything that I've been missing out on when I'm with you. You're everything that I could want or wish for."

A whimper escaped from her pouty lips as her actions continued to betray her words. She wanted this just as much as I did, even as she continued to fight me on it tooth and nail. _Literally._

"Those are pretty words, Edward, but-"

I lifted her chin and looked deep into her eyes. I needed her to grasp my words, fully and unconditionally.

"Hey, you can keep running from this if you want, but there's nowhere to hide. Kisses don't lie, Bella."

She whimpered again, and I lost myself in the breathless, sexy sound.

"You just remember that I know how to use a firearm the next time some skank tries to make a move on you. I don't share either."

I swear she growled as she ran her fingernails down my back. I arched from the pleasure.

"Duly noted."

We were moving fast and furious, but I knew it was too soon for anything overly physical like that. We had just had our first kiss yesterday, after all. My rational mind knew we had to lay a sound foundation before I could properly lay anything else.

_Shit._

I wanted her in the worst way. But, I wanted all of her, not just a piece, not a fleeting moment. Hell, I'm man enough to admit that I wanted the fairytale, too. So, waiting would be a no brainer if it meant she wouldn't have any regrets later. She was worth that and more to me.

_But God help us when we did finally give into this lust. _

Once we reluctantly untangled ourselves, we cuddled together under the blanket and continued to talk about nothing and everything. It was heaven.

From the even pattern of her breathing, I knew that she had dozed off. The fact that she was comfortable enough in my arms to fall asleep warmed my heart every time. I should have woken her up and taken her home. The gentleman she thought I was would have done that, but, deep down, I was a selfish bastard and I didn't want this night to end.

_Ever._

xx_C_xx

**BPOV**

I woke up in a daze, unsure of where I was. I could hear traffic and feel a breeze that I had no business feeling from my _own_ bed, even if I had the window open. When I felt strong, warm arms tightening around me from behind, memories from the night before flooded me. I remembered strategically walking on eggshells and a fear so strong I was choking on it. Those memories were so strong, I cringed. But I also remembered coming to the realization that I was safe and secure with this man, I just had to allow myself to believe it. I also remembered his hands on my body. _Gah!_ It felt so good, my panties almost caught on fire.

_Yeah, that about covers it._

I knew that, in the recesses of my mind, my doubt would continue to skim the surface. That was a fact that I had come to live with. I can't change it; it's simply how I'm built. But I could _try,_ and that was the revelation that gave me hope when that thought hit me last night. For this man, for Edward, I could try to put my trust and my faith in something that I simply _did not_ trust in. I could do this for us. I would trust my heart this time.

Surprising and strategically placed kisses along the column of my neck shook the fog off, but it only seemed to replace it with a new, much more potent one. I turned as gracefully as the narrow seat would allow. I melted into him; morning breath be damned. Light closed mouth pecks became open mouthed kisses in record time. I was proud of myself for being able to resist him last night, but I knew I wasn't quite as strong as I thought I was. I wanted him so badly; I could literally taste it. And, if what I felt inside his pants was any indication, I would say that he wanted me just as much. I could almost see how long and thick he was. A man as beautiful as Edward was was bound to have an equally impressive package to make my resistance all the more futile. I ground myself into him, hoping to create a better visual for myself.

_Wow…No doubt. _

His large, strong hands grabbed firmly onto my ass as he held on and kneaded it, pulling me into him more tightly. I would never get enough of how much he seemed to appreciate my ass! This was the sweetest form of torture I could ever be subjected to. He was tearing me up into tiny, bite sized pieces…and I loved every minute of it. How could I not? This was the stuff my fantasies had been made of for the entire time that I'd known him. The mere thought had led me to drift off in thought during class. I damn near ran into other waitresses while on the job.

Somehow, being with him this way was too much and not enough all at the same time. As I felt my resolve crumbling, brick by brick, I could hear the faint boom and hiss of a microphone being tested at the podium:

_Microphone check, one two, one two…Bella! Isabella Marie Octavia Swan! Don't you dare!_

**Grab it, Bella. You know you want to! Hell, if you won't, I'll do it!**

They were back. The Devil on my left side just mugged the Angel in the face as she told me to go ahead and reach inside his pants and see firsthand what I was working with. The Angel on my right, however, was urging me to save something for later. _She was staring at his chest as she said it, but I understood the conflict. _In the end, the Angel won, like she often did. I couldn't play myself like that, not on the first date.

I slowly brought the heat of our kisses down to a low boil. Once he caught the hint, we turned it all the way down to a simmer, sharing a few more deep and meaningful smooches before we settled in and pressed our foreheads together.

"Thank you for last night. It was fantastic." I said, truly meaning my words.

He kissed me lightly on the tip of my nose. "That was just the first of many, Ms. Swan."

xx_C_xx

I carefully unlocked the front door, hoping to tiptoe my way into the apartment without alerting Rose to my arrival.

"Good date, huh?"

I cringed and stopped walking.

Rose and Alice were both in pajamas and standing in the walkway. I was so focused on my steps being careful; I hadn't even thought to look up. The expressions on their faces were priceless as they caught me on my walk of shame.

I decided to ignore Rose's question. If she wanted details, she was gonna have to wait for them. _And her little friend, too._

"Alice, what are you doing here?" I asked, opting to busy myself by making coffee rather than wait on the Spanish Inquisition to start.

"Well, I wanted to see your face when you got back from your first date with my brother. Once it got so late that Emmett and Jasper called it a night and went home, I just ended up staying. At that point, I _really_ wanted to catch you trying to sneak in."

I rolled my eyes just as Rose decided to interrupt her. You could tell she was full to bursting with the shit she wanted to say.

"Speaking of which, I can't believe you slept with him on the first date! Ho!"

_For the love of…_

"Pump your breaks. I didn't sleep with him."

She gave me a look that said she didn't believe me, so I amended my statement.

"I _should_ have slept with him, but I didn't."

She almost looked - disappointed?

"Well, shit. I can't tease you if you didn't sleep with him yet. What the hell were you guys doing all night?"

"We actually slept, slut bag!" We all laughed as they sat down and I gave them each a mug. "We made dinner, we drank, and we talked. We honestly just enjoyed spending some time together."

"Really?" Alice asked. She was so hopeful that I had kept my chastity intact. I doubt I would have had the heart to tell her if we actually had sex.

"Yes! Really! It was honestly one of the nicest, most relaxing nights that I've ever spent with a guy. He's so cute and so sweet to me. He's not afraid to express himself, even if he is a little shy about it. I've never experienced anything like it."

I think she may have swooned a little.

_And I knew exactly how she felt._

"And you're sure you didn't get a peek at the merchandise?" Rose laughed.

"Rose!" Alice chided, but that only made her laugh harder.

"What? How and why are you such a fucking prude all of a sudden? She spent all night with the man, so I know she at least got to check out the snacks. Right, Bells? I know I've taught you better than that!"

I didn't even answer her, but I'm sure my blush gave her the confirmation she was looking for.

She winked at me as she hid the single handed spirit fingers she gave me so Alice couldn't see her.

"Speaking of snacks, it was nerve wracking at first. I totally freaked out in the grocery store."

"No you didn't," Rose said, looking at me skeptically over her coffee mug.

"Yeah, I did," I giggled. I could laugh about it in hindsight, but the fear that I felt on the freeway was real. "I swear to you both, I damn near called you to come and get me. I thought I was gonna start hyperventilating once we were on the way to his house!"

The look on Alice's face was one of pure sadness. "But why, Bella? I thought you liked my brother?"

_She was killing me with the 'Puss and Boots' eyes._

"I don't know, Alice. I guess it just hit me that we had officially passed the basic 'infatuation' stage in all of this. We had just entered into win, lose, or draw country and that's some heavy shit for somebody like me that's allergic to all things love related. I think that was my safety net. I could always chalk things up to my being wrong about his signals or about him just being a jerk. We hadn't truly confirmed anything to each other before yesterday. Once we left the store and got in that car, it got _way_ too real for me."

"So what did you do? How did you get over it?" Rose asked.

"Well, I gave myself a pep talk. When we got to his place, I started looking around, checking out his personal space, how he lives. I decided then and there that I genuinely wanted to be a part of his life…and not just as a friend. I can't say that my past isn't gonna continue to pop up and haunt me, but I have to make an effort to not let it keep me from letting Edward in. If I don't, I'll always be _that_ girl and I won't have anyone to blame for being alone but myself."

They were both quiet as they absorbed my words.

"That was extremely profound. I'm proud of you," Rose nodded.

Alice smiled from ear to ear. "Me too! So when's the wedding?"

I spit my coffee all across the breakfast bar.

"Uh uhn. I think _you_ need to pump your brakes now, Munchkin. I'll have both of you scavengers know that I'm not ready to be a concubine _or _a wife. Besides, that was only the first time we've ever done anything where it was just us. As much as I love you guys, we needed that time together. Now, when I decide which one I'm gonna be, you guys will be the first to know."

"Yeah, we can be pretty rowdy when we're altogether, huh? There's no way to have an intimate moment when the whole crew is around," Rose snickered.

I took my coffee and made my way to my room for a much needed shower, laughing and shaking my head at my silly ass friends. When I got there, my closet was standing open and half of it had been emptied out, covering my entire bedspread.

_Alice._

"Alice! Why is there shit all over my bed?" I yelled down the hall.

She yelled right back.

"I needed to make some room in your closet, but you came home before I could clean it up. I figured I'd keep a few things in there since I'm here so much. Hope you don't mind!"

I looked over my shoulder and she was standing right next to me.

"We need to go shopping soon. You need to update some stuff that I took the liberty of tossing for you," she said. I groaned as I shut the door in her face.

xx_C_xx

Sunday morning was relaxing. After the carnival ride that the rest of the weekend had proven to be, a day to veg out in my sweats was just what the doctor ordered. We sat around, just sipping coffee and celebrating the moments of our lives. Rose gave us a status update on her and Emmett after Alice told us how Edward had found out about her not so incognito situation with Jasper.

"So, he didn't fly off the handle or anything?" Rose asked.

Alice shrugged her shoulders. "No, it didn't sound like it. Jazz said he was all cool and shit about it. I don't know. I'm sure we'll sit down and talk at some point.

I could tell she was still doubtful about it all. "I honestly don't think you need to worry. He loves both of you guys and, if you make each other happy, how can he have a problem with it?"

She nodded her agreement, but I knew she'd feel better once she had the chance to talk to her brother.

Just as her brother crossed my mind, my phone vibrated on the coffee table. Rose jumped to get it and tossed it over my head to Short Round on my other side. When I lunged toward her, she tossed it under her leg back towards Rose.

"How fucking old are you two?" I whined.

They laughed at me until I had to pull out the big guns. I crossed my arms over my chest and started to pout. That had always been Rose's kryptonite. She finally gave up the phone, but not until they'd had their fill of me being the monkey in the middle. Emmett was proving to be a _horrible_ influence.

"Quit being a baby!" Alice laughed, pushing past me to get to the kitchen.

"Short people have no reason to live, you know?"

I opened up my phone, grinning wide as I read the text message that waited for me.

_**Up 4 a l8 lunch 2day?**_


	16. It's Gotta Be Destiny

Big thanks to both **Mimi** and **Sunflower3759** for their time, expertise and support.

**As per usual…**

Quotes, images, songs, and lyrics belong to their respective writers and/or artists.

Sadly enough, I _don't_ own anything related to Twilight. I _do_ own my original characters and my original story. No copyright infringement is intended.

Hate it or love it…let me know. Matter of fact, tell a friend! I won't mind!

**Chapter 16 – It's Gotta Be Destiny**

_"To be in love is merely to be  
>in a state of perpetual anesthesia:<br>To mistake an ordinary young man for a Greek god  
>or an ordinary young woman for a goddess."<em>  
>- H.L. Mencken<p>

**EPOV**

When I dropped Bella off at home, I had a hard time letting her out the car. Now that I had an idea of what she felt like, what she tasted like, I never wanted to be without her again.

We were on number five of the 'just one more kiss' game.

"Edward, I could sit here all day kissing you, but I need to show my face at some point before Rose calls out a search party!"

She was right, so after a few more attempts at deepening our kisses, I let her go with the promise to talk later today.

I drove home with a huge smile on my face and an even bigger problem in my pants. That girl already had control over my mind, but now she was doing all sorts of things to my body. I should be embarrassed, but fuck that. I'll just be happy instead. I adjusted myself a few times to try and make the situation a bit more comfortable, but there was no use. My memories from the night before only made the problem worse. _God help me when we let things go further._

I groaned to no one in particular.

I stopped and grabbed a coffee and bagel for breakfast on my way back home since Alice and I weren't meeting up for brunch today. Once I got there, I took an extra long, hot shower in order to take care of my persistent _little_ problem. It took two tries, but I was able to gain some momentary relief and soon I was settled in to enjoy a quiet morning.

I was reading the paper when I got a text from Jasper wanting to play Madden online. I put my headset on and started up the Xbox.

"It took you long enough Fucker," he said once I logged on.

"Good morning to you too, Dickhead."

We played the game with the usual amount of trash talk and bullshit. He used his usual team of losers – the Philadelphia Eagles - while I played with my normal squad – the New York Football Giants. I was out of practice, and Jasper was in rare form today, but not even losing a couple games was going to spoil my good mood.

"So, things went well with your date last night, I take it?"

I chuckled.

"I was wondering how long it was gonna take you to ask, but yeah, last night was sort of amazing," I said.

"Hmmm," he mused. "I'm glad to hear it. Did you finally get to see what our young Miss Swan is working with?"

I rolled my eyes. _Rico Suave_ here never had an issue with telling us all about his new adventures with 'whatever her name is.' He rarely went out with the same woman twice – something about repetition and variety. He did just enough to attain his all access pass to her bedroom.

_Whatever._

Let him tell it, most of his dates involved wining and dining, fucking and fleeing. It didn't matter if it was the first date. By the end of the night, he swore he wouldn't have anything left to give - he'd have a little white flag with the word bang coming out of his junk. I wasn't a prude and we were positive that his stories were mostly bullshit, but it didn't matter. He had life fucked up if he thought I was telling him _anything_ that had to do with me, Bella, or the bedroom.

_Not happening._

"Jasper," I said calmly, letting him sense my building frustration at his line of questioning.

"What? The quiet ones are _always_ the ones with the best tricks up their sleeves. I'm willing to bet an obscene amount of money that she has quite the arsenal when it comes to taking care of business between the sheets."

"Really now?" I asked, but he kept on like he hadn't heard me.

"Damn, remember that one chick I used to mess with, Sheila? _That_ girl was super quiet when we were in public, but she was nasty! One time, she dropped her napkin at the dinner table, just so she could crawl under the table and lick my entire…"

"Jasper! Don't forget that I know you're dating my little sister, Fucker."

"Yeah, I know. Still doesn't answer my question, though," he laughed.

Knowing I was going to tell him anyway, I sighed in resignation.

"As long as you understand that I'm gonna fuck you up two times when I see you, we're good. But no, we didn't get into anything physical last night."

All I could hear was coughing from his end of the headset.

"You're kidding, right? What are you waiting for? Your wedding night? You two have been having a mental fuck fest for months now!"

I didn't answer him, hoping he'd let it go since one of his players had just made it into the end zone.

"Dude, you know if Emmett were here he would tell you to take the handicapped sign off of your balls. He would tell you to pull your skirt down. No, no, scratch that. He would probably tell you to pull your skirt up!"

By this point, the asshat was in hysterics. He was probably rolling off of his couch, wiping the tears from his eyes. _Douchebag_. I was used to him laughing at me, that part came with the territory, but he was starting to piss me off.

"Jasper."

"I'm not even gonna call you a pussy because I'm sure you already know what you are by now."

_Damn, I can't wait until I see him again._

"Be that as it may, you fucking dog, neither one of us is in a rush to hop into bed."

"That's fucking obvious," he added.

I huffed in frustration.

"Look, we messed around some, so I know that when we actually take it there, it's gonna be insane. I don't know. It was one of those nights where everything was just perfect the way it was…but I wouldn't expect you to truly understand that."

He scoffed, "I'm hurt!"

"No, you're disgusting."

"Correction: I _used_ to be disgusting. Now I'm reformed."

"Bullshit," I laughed.

"No, really, I am, but my being on the side of monogamy now doesn't have _anything_ to do with whether or not _you_ got some last night."

"Touche…Jackass."

We laughed as we started another game.

"Seriously though, all the bullshit and driving myself crazy has been worth it. I can really see being able to build something with Bella, something real. I've never had that…with anybody. I don't want to mess that up by pushing her into something she's not ready for. She's had enough assholes in her life treating her that way."

He was quiet for beat. Then I heard a sniffle over the sound of the video game.

"I think I'm about to fucking cry, man."

"Fuck you, Jasper."

His laughter was infectious, so I joined in against my will. "Sometimes I wonder why I even call you my friend."

"That shit's not true and you know it."

"I know."

"Alright. I'm being serious now, bro. You're pretty sure about all of this, huh?"

That was the understatement of the century. If memory served me correctly, it was a wise man that once said, "I don't wanna be a player no more."

_I couldn't have said it better myself._

"Jasper, I can't even explain to you how I feel right now. Her spirit, her mind, her fucking body - everything about her was made for me. I don't know, man, she could be Mrs. Cullen one day."

His sharp intake of breath over my headset sounded out loud and clear. He knew I was being real with him about this. I meant business.

"I mean it Jazz, I'm out the game. I'm gonna do whatever I have to do make that girl mine for good."

We played out the fourth quarter before either of us spoke again.

"I like it. Determination looks good on you, Cullen. I'd wish you _and_ your dry balls the best of luck, but I don't think you'll need it."

I wish I shared his certainty. I felt a whole hell of a lot better, but we still had some waters to cross before I'd be the cocky motherfucker that Jasper could be. Ah, the delicate dance of being in a relationship.

"You're a jackass, but thanks, man. Bella is a stubborn one, so I'll take all the help I can get."

Our fifth game was over and he had beaten my ass soundly for three of them. We were just shooting the shit and going over our game stats at this point.

"You mentioned something about stubborn," Jasper said.

"Yep, I sure did. Why?"

" I was wondering if maybe we could sit down and talk about _that thing_ you mentioned at the Halloween party when you weren't busy romancing Miss Swan."

I chuckled to myself.

_So predictable._

"That _thing_? What thing?"

"You know. _That _thing."

I knew exactly what '_thing_' he was talking about. He wanted to talk about my sister. _And he called me a pussy?_ Well, I had already given him a life raft by letting him off the hook in regards to being a man about it and telling me himself. I wasn't going out of my way anymore.

"Oh, yeah…_that_ thing. We'll talk, bro. We'll talk for sure. I've got something that I need to do though, so I'll catch up with you later," I said nonchalantly.

"Oh, ok. That sounds good. I'll hit you up later then."

I smiled to myself as I turned off the game system and put my headset on the end table. I had managed to make Jasper uncomfortable as fuck and I had come up with a brilliant idea that would allow me to spend some more time with my girl. I sucked at Madden, but today was gonna be a good day.

I looked at the clock. Mid afternoon was perfect for what I had in mind. I grabbed my phone and sent Bella a text message with the hope that she wasn't tired of looking at my face just yet:

_**Up 4 a l8 lunch 2day?**_

xx_C_xx

A couple hours later, we were walking through Lincoln Park. The sun was shining, and the wind was whipping around us, but as we walked and talked, our steaming hot cups of cocoa made everything seem warm and inviting.

As we walked along the scenic lakefront, I thought over the conversation we had over lunch. I had Bella meet me at one of my favorite seafood restaurants close to the park, hoping to turn our lunch date into an all day excursion if I could. Now that I had a taste of what time alone with her was like, I had become insatiable. I wanted more…much more.

When she walked into the dining area, I was again struck by how attractive she was without even trying. Her hair was wavy, and her natural, warm blush and lips were highlighted by the crimson hue of her sweater. Her magnificent curves were accented perfectly by skinny jeans and tall boots she was wearing. Once again, she caught me staring.

_Gorgeous._

To those around us, it may have seemed that chivalry made me stand to greet her. Truth be told, it was mainly my overwhelming desire to touch her. I took her hand in mine, but then thought better of it. I pulled her into a hug, taking a feather light kiss from her lips for good measure.

"Thank you for coming. I missed you," I whispered close to her earlobe like she loved.

Her eyes flickered doubt for a brief moment. I might have missed it, but she'd shown me that emotion so many times before.

"Well, thank you for inviting me. I may have been missing you a little, too."

"Just a little, huh?"

She held up her thumb and pointer finger to show me exactly how much.

"Yeah, maybe just the tiniest bit," she chuckled. She was trying to be funny about it, but I could tell that she meant it. Hell, she wore her embarrassment around like a neon sign half of the time.

_I'd never get tired of seeing that blush, especially not when I was the one causing it. I may as well have a remote control for that shit._

I touched her warm, rosy cheek because I could. Once we were seated and comfortable, the waiter took our drink orders and gave us some privacy. Most normal people would jump right into conversation. They would chat and ask questions like how has your day been or what have you been up to?

Not us.

The mundane seemed like a stupid place to start. Frankly, I was tired of driving myself crazy with the _shoulds _and _should nots_. I just wanted to be with her, to bask in her presence. I wanted to radiate in her glow. So I did.

Clearly we agreed on that because we just sat there – staring at each other.

She was quiet. I was quiet.

We simply looked at one another. It wasn't weird or uncomfortable. We just _were_. The unspoken heat, that electrical buzz, it was all there, sure and persistent. The quiet vibrated and thumped along in between us like a sensual song. It had become white noise for us. Comforting. Relaxing. The way she would bat her eyelashes or lick her lips had me in a trance of sorts. Not to mention her adorable attempt not to smile as we continued our little stare down.

_Shit. I shoulda rubbed another one out before I called her._

As uncomfortable as this attraction was making me physically, I knew that her smile was all the entertainment I needed right now. I did a terrible job at trying to hide my own satisfied grin. Once the waiter came back, he dropped off our iced tea and lemonade. He took our order and left us to our own devices again.

"Does this seem strange to you?"

Her whispered question broke our bubble. Not necessarily in a bad way, but I would have been completely content just sitting here, continuing to take her in.

"How do you mean?" I asked.

"Well, I was so certain that we were going to hate each other when I started working at Clarity. I thought you were going to be a big, humorless dick toward me."

I had to interrupt her. "Part of that is actually right on the money."

I winked at her. She just rolled her eyes and kept talking.

"Anyway, it almost seems unreal that we've been feeling the same things all of this time. And this pull? This feels…" she trailed off.

"Intense?" I figured I'd go ahead and finish the statement for her since we obviously weren't gonna be beating around the bush here.

She nodded, lowering her eyes as she did.

_Uh-uh, none of that. Not today._

I reached across the table and lightly lifted her chin.

"Honestly? This never seemed strange to me at all," I stated confidently. "As a matter of fact, it felt more like déjà vu than anything else when I first saw you with Alice."

She looked at me thoughtfully, the face of pure confusion.

"What do you mean? Had you seen me at your house or something? How's that even possible when you were never around when I visited your parents with Alice?" she asked quickly, trying to make logical sense of my statement.

The only problem with that was that my mind wasn't operating on logic anymore when it came to us.

I shook my head, smirking at how she wasn't catching my drift.

"No, that's not what I'm talking about."

She tilted her head, scrunching her little face up at me. She had no clue how deep this ran for me, even after last night.

The little voice in my head was still terrified of scaring her off, so I tried to be as clear and concise as I could in my explanation. I took a deep breath and finally said fuck it. It was a risk, but she'd done the same for me. _Here goes nothing._

"Bella, I've never been superstitious, but you're what I've dreamed of. Déjà vu might not be the perfect phrase since we hadn't met before, but I stand by it."

She arched a brow and narrowed her eyes a bit. "Explain."

I laughed, thanking God that I was catching more and more glimpses of my sweet and sassy girl. I should have known by now there was no other way for me to put it on the table for her but with blatant honesty. That's a big reason why things had been so muddled and fucked up before. Now she wanted it raw and uncut, straight, no chaser. _This_ is the girl that I had come to know and love.

_Wait a minute. Love?_ I'm sure I'd thought it before, but yeah, that sounds right to me. I _love _my Bella.

"Let's see. How can I explain this?" I pretended to think about what I wanted to say, loving how impatient she seemed to get all of a sudden. Oddly enough, this was an easy question for me to answer.

"Yours is the face that I see when I consider any quality that might be important to me. You, Bella, embody everything that I could have thought about when I came to the realization that I wanted something more meaningful in my life. Hell, you're even the things that I never considered before. You? This? It _has_ to be destiny."

Her eyes widened and all of the color drained from her face at the same time.

_Well…damn._

That wasn't at all what I expected.

I figured she'd give me a few nervous chuckles, maybe even call bullshit on me, but the look on her face wasn't something I had ever seen on her before. Well, maybe once before. She was pretty freaked out that night at the club when we saw Embry.

But shit, this wasn't the same thing. This was a good thing, right?

_Shit…_

As her immediate reaction sank in, I considered backtracking and making it more palatable for her to absorb. Just because I was all in didn't mean she had to be, right? I could have kicked myself for being so blunt so soon. I mean, this wasn't soon at all for me. Hell, it feels like we've been at this for ages, but I had come to a point of clarity in regards to this long before she had wrapped her mind around the idea. I knew that and I respected it.

I was done with all of that. Fuck all this fear and being timid with one another. _It's time to shit or get off the pot. _

"I'm really sorry if that scares you, but it's the truth," I said, willing my voice not to crack.

I wouldn't back down and change what I had said. Not at this moment. Not ever. This was my truth and I wasn't about to backpedal. If I couldn't believe in it enough to stand behind it, then she never would.

I watched her take a long sip of her iced tea as she absorbed my words. I could literally see her playing it in her head, mulling it over. What could have only been a few seconds felt like an eternity as I waited for a response –something – anything.

Inside, I steeled myself for the agony of defeat or the embarrassment of rejection, whichever came first.

Before I knew what was happening, a crimson and cream colored blur flew across the table and into my arms. She had damn near knocked me out of my chair, but I recovered quickly once I realized she hadn't run from me. She had run straight to me, straddling my lap and planting a big sloppy wet one squarely on my lips.

Needless to say, I was floored by her reaction.

"What's the matter?" She giggled as she traced along my jaw line with her tiny finger.

I stumbled with my words, still in shock at how she had taken my declaration. That shock must have registered fresh and true across my face.

"It's just that, uh, very few people surprise me."

I coughed a little, wanting to clear at least one of those octaves from my voice.

"Yeah, well, you're lucky. Most of 'em shock the hell outta me," she said with a wink.

Before I could get her settled in the way that I truly wanted her, she was out of my lap and back in her own seat.

"Have you noticed that you always catch me when I jump on you, Edward?" she asked, all shy and come hither like.

It was my turn to raise an eyebrow at her.

"Baby, you have no idea how good of a catcher I am," I wiggled my eyebrows to show her I meant business. "I'll be here to catch it whenever you want to throw it at me."

We enjoyed the rest of our lunch, laughing and talking as we watched the world outside passing us by.

xx_C_xx

After I paid the check, I convinced Ms. Swan to spend a little more time with me. I suggested a trip through Lincoln Park since it was such a pretty day.

_God, I sounded like a girl._

I felt a slight tug on my jacket sleeve right before I felt Bella trying to wrap her much smaller hand around mine. Once she realized it was a lost cause, she slid her fingers in between mine instead.

_Heaven._

Stopping off at a vendor to buy two hot chocolates, we strolled through the park, hand in hand, on a beautiful, blustery Chicago afternoon. We sat down on a bench overlooking the water once Bella spotted one that she liked.

"So what are your plans for the holidays?" I asked. Thanksgiving was right around the corner and I wanted to be prepared if I had to be away from her for the weekend.

"Umm, I hadn't really made any. Charlie is going on an extended fishing trip with some of the guys from the reservation back home and Rose is travelling with her family, so I'll probably keep it low key and hang around the apartment," she said.

_Bella alone over the holidays? That's unacceptable._

"No, I don't think I like that. Why don't you come home with me and Alice? I think Jasper is coming up this year, too."

"That's sweet, Edward, but no, I'll be fine. I wouldn't want to impose on your family like that."

We went back and forth on the topic for a bit and she wasn't giving up any ground. I conceded, but only because I had a plan. I knew of two people that were just as good at arguing their points as she was…if not better. I'd leave this job to the professionals.

"Do you really believe in all of that? Destiny or whatever?" She asked, pulling me from my internal planning.

I smiled on the inside, glad to know that my words were still on her mind.

"Sorta. You don't?"

"I don't know. It's hard to look at some things and believe that they were destined to happen."

I knew I was the pot calling the kettle black, but I hated how jaded my Bella could be sometimes. She was such a complex individual. She was so bright and warm. She drew people in simply by being her, but there were other times when she seemed so clouded over by memories of her past. It was as if the lines of being a realist and being a defeatist were blurred, especially in the companionship department. I truly couldn't blame her, but I would make it my mission to change that.

"Are we talking about in life or in love?" I asked.

She thought about it for a moment.

"What's the difference if you have love in your life?" She countered.

"Touche," I laughed as I pulled her closer. "I've always believed that everything that happens is for a specific reason or purpose. The trick to that is we may not always know what that reason is until after the fact."

"Hmm. That sounds like some shit you say to get over the fact that something fairly fucked up happened to you."

_Prime example._

"I guess that works, too. My mom actually has some interesting thoughts on the matter," I said as I looked into her eyes, hoping she was interested in hearing _Deep Thoughts_ by Esme Cullen.

"Ok, I'm game. Shoot," she shrugged.

"Well, when we were growing up, she would always have some uplifting saying or quote to make us feel better. She would tell us that sunny days wouldn't be special if it wasn't for rain. Or joy wouldn't feel so good if it wasn't for pain; that's one of her favorites."

She nodded with a gleam of familiarity behind her eyes.

"I can totally see her saying that. She's had a few choice words for Alice and me over the years. At least it makes you feel better whether it's bullshit or not, right."

"Whatever am I gonna do with you, my sweet and salty girl?"

"Sweet and salty? What am I now, a pretzel?"

The sounds of her laughter rang out throughout the expanse of the park.

Suddenly, I felt the need to clarify the little nickname I had just used.

I pulled her impossibly closer, much closer than she already was tucked under my arm. I swung her legs around so they laid securely across mine. I didn't care about being on this very public bench - I wanted her to know that I was for real.

She squealed in surprise as I gently cupped her face, pressing our foreheads together.

"You, my dear, are extremely sweet, but you're as salty as a sailor when you want to be."

She started to interrupt me, but I silenced her with a forceful kiss on the mouth. When I pulled away, her eyes were wide and clear, like she was mesmerized by my actions. If that made her agreeable to what I was about to say, then I was good with it.

"If that combination makes you a pretzel, then so be it. But…you missed the part about being mine. I know you're still hesitant. I know you want to protect yourself. I get that. I'm all for that. I know you're tired of the usual. I can give you so much more than that - if you'll let me. Please be mine, Bella. Please."

I wrapped my arm around her waist and cradled the back of her head as she allowed me to kiss her again. Our tongues tangled and stroked, triggering little sounds and breathy moans of satisfaction that went straight to my lower half. I poured everything that I felt for her into that kiss. I would gladly continue to beg if it meant I'd be able to have her this way. I sucked on her bottom lip for a bit before we were finally able to pull ourselves apart.

"I thought we had already been over this, Edward," she whispered breathlessly as she held tightly to the collar of my coat.

My breathing situation wasn't much better.

"I learned a long time ago not to assume _anything _when it comes to you."

She snorted as she shook her head at me.

"A wise man once told me, and I quote: _I am yours. At least, that's what I want to be_."

The use of my own words against me was enough to make me want to stake my claim on her right here in the middle of this fucking park. Little kids, the elderly and unsuspecting tourists be damned. Before I could pull her in again and embarrass us both, our phones vibrated at the same time.

We both looked down, making eye contact almost immediately after reading our text messages. We must have received the very same one.

"Umm, I was going to ask you if you had plans for the night, but I don't think that'll be necessary," I said, regretfully running my hands through my hair.

"Yeah, doesn't look like it. Would you mind dropping me off at my apartment?"

"Yes, I _do_ mind, but of course I will since I'll only have to be apart from you for a short while."

She kissed me on the cheek and I squeezed her hand. I suppose it was our way of apologizing to each other for our equally overzealous sets of friends. We got up and walked to my car that was still parked at the restaurant, hand in hand I might add.

_If Jasper could see me now._

**BPOV**

He probably thinks I'm some sort of freak by now. I'm always jumping on him and kissing him. Can't help it. And did I mention how much of a turn on a commanding Edward is? _Gah!_

That man is sex on legs. Sex on fire! And we hadn't even done it yet.

But his question was as stupid as it was redundant.

_Just saying._

I'm not sure what kind of vibe I was throwing him, but I thought it was clear. I had become _his_ a long time ago. I never did well under the girlfriend moniker, but he was right. I was tired of the usual and everything about this man so far had been extraordinary. Everything that I felt, both with him and for him, had been unusual. He was not your regular guy; that much was for sure.

When the text message from Alice came through, I knew I would have some explaining to do. The activity that the gang had picked for tonight was something that I had mentioned last night, during our time together. _Briefly._ I may have failed to mention that I was borderline addicted to it and that my two best friends shared in that addiction. It was our guilty pleasure and we didn't usually share that fact with others. I knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that it was game-on tonight when Alice told me, (in no uncertain terms) that Edward needed to be considered 'the enemy' as soon as he dropped me off at the apartment.

_Shit._

It took everything inside of me not to burst out into a nervous giggle. He would _really_ think I was a freak then. I just hoped he would still love me after we gave them all a long, merciless ass whooping.

_Whoa…wait…love?_


	17. Only Wanna Give it to You

Big thanks and a warm welcome to my new beta **Ninmesarra**! Glad to have you!

Thanks and hugs also go to my girls **Mimi** and **Sunflower3759** for their time, expertise, and support.

I couldn't ask for more awesome people to help me!

Best of the New Year to everybody! I'm so grateful to all who continue to read, review and recommend this little story. We're coming up on the light at the end of the tunnel soon, but I'm not done writing by a long shot. Put me on alert if you haven't already…

**As per usual…**

Quotes, images, songs, and lyrics belong to their respective writers and/or artists.

Sadly enough, I _don't_ own anything related to Twilight. I _do_ own my original characters and my original story. No copyright infringement is intended.

Hate it or love it…let me know. Matter of fact, tell a friend! I won't mind!

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**Chapter 17 – Only Wanna Give It to You**

**Passion surprises. **

**One doesn't search it. **

**It can happen to you tomorrow.**

**-Isabelle Adjani**

**BPOV**

They knew us pretty well here at Lucky Strike. As far as bowling alleys go, this place was considered a fairly high end establishment. No, we weren't strangers to regular, plain old bowling alleys, not by a long shot, but the atmosphere here suited all three of us and would be perfect for the night that Alice and Rose had planned. Besides, we could wine and dine our boys after we thoroughly humiliated them with our surprise attack.

I still didn't feel completely comfortable with what we had planned. I hadn't _truly_ shared the scope of my passion for bowling with Edward, but the girls assured me that Emmett and Jasper were in the dark as well, so that would only make this night that much sweeter. Alice was the true fiend for having been able kept this from her brother for so long.

Speaking of her brother, my revelation that I may have feelings of love for him, sat in my stomach and let itself be known. It wasn't heavy or anything like that. It just…was. I rolled the idea of it around in my head for awhile, but it always ended back in my belly.

_Strange._

We walked into the place like we were the baddest bitches out. Rose led us through the doors as we flanked her sides. Our look was very retro: All three of us in black spandex capri leggings, mini dresses straight from the 50s, smoky eyes and fire engine red lips. My dress was aqua, Alice was in pink and Rose was in red. All three had our team name and logo emblazoned on the back.

This wasn't your usual place to bowl. No sloppy fuckers were allowed here; you had to at least be neat and casually dressed to even get in the door. We quickly understood the reasoning behind that on our first night here. The establishment routinely hosted elaborate corporate parties and celebrities could be found frequenting the place on any given night. Having been in Chicago for only a short period of time, I was supremely star struck at first. Hell, I was from Forks for fucks sake! Alice followed me around with a drool mop as she laughed her ass off.

That first night, Rose could have easily taken Fred Durst or Ashton Kutcher home with her. She said she was flattered, but she had too much respect for Demi to take him up on his offer. We damn near had to drag her out of there the night that Tom Selleck made a pass at her!

We had our bowling ball bags and our clothing bags slung over our shoulders as per usual. We would change into more 'suitable' attire once our games were over. If there's one thing to be said about Alice, she never did anything halfway – ever. Rose wore a high ponytail while I opted for one that hung low to the side and wrapped around my shoulder. Alice had pin curls and spikes throughout her short cropped cut.

We could see the guys who were already at our two lanes lacing up their bowling shoes. Alice must've had this planned for some time as they were all casually cool in their own retro bowling shirts and slacks, very ala Charlie Sheen. Edward looked as yummy as ever while I wondered where they had found a shirt big enough for Emmett's massive shoulders. Jasper even had on a matching fedora to complete his look.

Once they looked up and noticed us walking towards them, it was like they had turned into cartoon characters – much like the other men along our path. Eyes bugged out and jaws dropped like dominoes. Rose popped her bubble gum as if her life depended on it and Alice had the cutest little black scarf tied around her neck. We even had on high heeled bowling shoes. We couldn't actually _bowl_ in them, but they always made motherfuckers drool, so Rose said we had no other choice but to wear them.

The three of us were your average, everyday unassuming chicks, but we were a force to be reckoned with when it came to this bowling shit. It's hard to pinpoint exactly how the problem started. Rose and I had been bowling since we were little kids. It became a high. The attention that we got for being so good at it was like a drug. Once we got older and started filling out in all the right places, we sort of took it and ran. When we met Alice at school, she came along with us one night to some hole in the wall alley we had found. To our surprise, she showed us that she was pretty damn good herself.

Alice thought we all needed to match, head to toe, but I thought that was a little over the top – if there was such a thing considering what we were doing. She pouted, of course, but I negotiated a compromise with her. We could all wear the same outfit if we each had the right to choose our own color dresses. I also had the final say on the name and logo for our little team. She reluctantly agreed after I told her I'd slit my wrist if I had to wear pink or be referred to as a 'pink lady'.

And so the BFBH Commission was born…

xx_C_xx

**EPOV**

"You've gotta be fucking kidding me," Emmett whispered.

When Jazz and I turned around, all rational thought left my brain. I guess that's what happens when all your blood flow moves from your brain to other extremities in less than five seconds.

"Holy…" was all I could sputter out.

"It's a damn good thing we didn't put any money up on this shit," Jazz groaned. "I'm going to get some beer."

Our ladies screamed hardcore and oozed charisma as they walked through the crowd. They could have told me they owned the place and I would have had no other choice but to believe them. This was _clearly_ something they did on a regular basis. I know how much my sister loves to play dress up, but you could tell by the way they walked, the satisfaction on their faces, the sureness in their postures that this was much more than a game to them. This was serious business.

_How the fuck did I not know about this?_

Any frustration that I felt at not being aware that they had a bowling team fled the minute Bella approached me. She placed her bags on the floor and walked right up to me. She pulled me down to her height by way of my hair and ruined all of that pretty red lipstick she was wearing. As soon as she pulled away from me, she delicately wiped the smudge from her bottom lip and began her own preparations. Such a fucking lady, I swear.

_Remember that blood flow I mentioned a minute ago? Yeah…_

The way her hips swung as she silently commanded the attention of any and all beings with testosterone was downright criminal. If Rosalie was a Coke bottle in red, then my Bella was an ice cold bottle of Pepsi in blue. My sister doesn't count cause…that's just gross. Suddenly, I was thirsty as hell. And those fuck me heels weren't helping. They had me starting to sweat…

_Wait…heels?_

This was too much. I wanted to be amused, they were obviously very serious about this shit, but instead, I was a little afraid. Who takes their bowling to this level, and where were the burps and beer bellies?

Emmett must've been channeling my inner thoughts.

"Now, hold on a minute. Where the fuck did you find high heeled bowling shoes? _What_ is going on?"

Alice looked up as she laced the shoes that she actually planned to bowl in. They were powder puff pink just like her dress. "What's the matter, Em? Do you have a _problem_ with our shoes? Rose was certain that you'd like them."

Just then, Rose put her foot up on the chair directly in front of Emmett, slowly undoing the ankle straps on the shoes in question. "I'm so sorry, Baby. I thought for sure you'd want to see these up close later. I must have been wrong."

He frantically grabbed at her wrist, "No, hell no! I don't have a problem with them at all, I just…I didn't know you even liked bowling. You guys came in here like you were bowling superheroes or some shit."

And they did. My Bella was chock full of surprises it would seem.

"You dames aren't trying to swindle anybody tonight, are you?" Jazz asked when he returned with a tray of beer. "I'd like to know up front if I'm going to have to pound on some of the patrons of this fine establishment."

One of said patrons had just walked past Bella from behind much more slowly than he needed to. By the look on her face, she was clueless to his presence, so he hadn't touched her. Still, I could feel a growl building up low in my belly_. Mine._

"That might be in order regardless."

I could feel my fists tightening at my sides. This was going to be one long fucking night.

**BPOV**

"No, we are _not_ ringers. That only cheapens the game," I chuckled at Jazz, answering truthfully and speaking from experience. Rose and I had hustled the pants off of most of the residence of Forks. After a while, it just wasn't fun anymore.

Edward had reacted a whole lot better than I thought he would. Not that I expected him to be angry with me. I guess I figured he would laugh at us, but all three of the guys seemed to be stuck in a combination of awe, fear and a good amount of caveman mixed in for good measure.

Emmett hadn't released Rose's calf muscle yet, Jazz had his full on Clark Gable Southern Hospitality Mack Daddy thing going on with Alice and Edward had a big purple vein pounding away in his forehead. I turned to see what his problem was and saw that some random guy was checking me out. He was a little ways away by that point, so Edward must have been following his gaze.

"Hey, hey, I'm here with _you_," I whispered, trying to sound soothing. "You can relax there, slugger."

He just nodded as he cracked his knuckles and neck simultaneously.

_Captain Caveman is all kinds of hot right now. Just saying._

Once he seemed sufficiently calmed down, I went to get my ball out of my bag. She was my baby.

"Alright, peeps, let's get this party started!" Alice squealed as she put her airbrushed Hello Kitty bowling ball in the ball return. She was using the white one tonight, but she had a total of three of them. It was just a big old shot of Hello Kitty's face with a flower in her hair. Each one of them was adorable, but a tad bit girly for my tastes. Not to mention how it stuck out like a sore thumb next to the house balls that the guys were using.

She diligently started adding names into the computer. I cringed a little, but tried not show any discomfort as I shot the shit with Jasper and Emmett.

Rose walked over and placed her clear ball in with the others. She was going with simple tonight, forgoing her tiger print ball. That one was my favorite, but this one was special. It was the original and the best. It was her signature. Hell, I remember saving money all summer and going with her to Newton's to buy this ball. It was the summer between ninth and tenth grade and she absolutely had to have it. It was clear with a big red rose in the middle.

Once all of the guys' names had been entered into the computer, I knew it was time for me to get into the game. If they were going to laugh at us, that time was now. No one had asked about our team name or individual names yet, but now that all of the attention was on the lane, it couldn't be avoided.

I grabbed _Double F_ and put her in the ball return. Edward walked up behind me, placing a hand on my hip, and whispering in my ear.

"What do we have here?"

I closed my eyes tightly as he rolled the ball around with his fingertips. Like I said, this was my baby, and I'd hate to have to kick my brand spanking new boyfriend in the junk for making fun of her. Especially since I hadn't even been properly introduced to said junk yet.

I knew what he would see upon further inspection.

At first glance, it was just a regular black ball. But the black had a luminescence and glow to it caused by the particle resin cover stock that I had it made in. The particle resin makes it easier for me to control the force and the reaction of the ball as it rolls down the lane. That, and it looked cool as shit. Of course, I wasn't about to tell him all of that. On the other side there were purple paint splotches and a caricature that I knew he had seen fully once I felt his breath hitch. The caricature was of me. Naturally, I didn't truly look like that, but it was me, none the less. I had an art major friend of mine do the mock up and I fell in love with her instantly.

The little figure had a knockout body and wore a Jessica Rabbit dress, only hers was short and she donned a red garter around her thigh. She wore pearls and her long dark hair seductively covered one eye. She was on her knees and looked over her shoulder with the funniest little smile on her face. Oh, and she held a bloody knife in her hand, unapologetically allowing it to drip on the floor. She was my _Femme Fatale_; or _Double F_ for short.

"Wow," was all he said.

I waited patiently for the laughing to begin, but it never did. He traced the shell of my ear with his lips and I knew he felt my body shiver in response. I simply couldn't control how I reacted to him. He was so close; he could probably feel it tingling, too.

"When you enjoy something, you enjoy it _fully_, don't you, Ms. Swan?" He asked, mercilessly continuing his assault, allowing the pads of his fingers to linger along the dip of my waist.

I breathed hard and shut my eyes, finding it difficult to take in enough oxygen all of a sudden.

"You know what they say. You either go hard or go home," I managed.

He chuckled, but it was without humor.

"Well, just so you know, I agree with that sentiment - wholeheartedly," he breathed into my ear, hot, wet and sultry, as he ground into my leg, showing me just how _much_ he agreed with my phrasing. "I can't wait until it's my turn – to be enjoyed."

My knees almost buckled right there at the ball return, but I held my ground. That was a good thing because he turned on his heel and went back over to sit next to Jasper.

"Yes, that's my goddamned bowling name so suck it!" Alice yelled as I shook my head to regain some composure before making my own way back to the group.

"What's the matter? "I asked, although I had an idea.

Emmett had his meaty hands raised in surrender.

"Look, it's not my fault that you call yourself _Little Mama_! It's cute and it's fitting, sue me!"

"Ok, before you all have a fucking field day with this shit, allow me to re-introduce our little group to you," Rose said as she stood up with her hands on her hips.

I could only shake my head.

_Here we go._

"As you now know, our friend in pink here is _Little Mama_. Don't take her size for weakness, gentlemen. Her being that much closer to the ground than you actually works to her advantage. But don't worry, you'll see that for yourselves in a little bit."

She even got up and did a little curtsy.

_Geez…._

"I am who they call _Hot Mama_. I wear red because I'm hot as fuck, obviously, and you will see flames more often than not when it's my turn."

_It's amazing that something you take pride in can sound so very, very stupid when it's said out loud in front of others…_

"And finally, I give you _Ill Mama_," she said with pride.

I, on the other hand, was feeling nausea, not pride.

"That's right, fellas. I said ill as in sick. Emergency room sick. This young lady wears blue. Blue is a calming color and she truly regrets how badly you're going to feel after challenging her. Because gentlemen, her game will leave you physically ill!"

When she finished, I really just wanted to get the game started. Alice and Jasper were up first. Alice hopped up, but Jasper hadn't budged. Instead, he raised his hand.

Rose raised an eyebrow. "Is there something that you wanted to say, Mr. Whitlock?"

He cleared his throat, walking around the invisible eggshells scattered around us. "Umm, yes, actually. I had a question if that's alright."

She regarded him before crossing her arms over her chest. "Go on."

"Well, I noticed your team name and logo on the back of your shirts. As a Marketing guy, it's hard to miss and I have to ask…what does the lipstick smudge and _BFBH Commission_ written over it stand for?"

Rose lit up like a Christmas tree and I cradled my pounding head in my hands.

She thawed to his inquiry immediately and I knew we were done for. Rose was my hard-assed ace in the hole and if _she_ was going soft…

"I'm _so_ glad that you asked. The _BFBH Commission_ stands for the Best Fucking Ball Handlers! Pun intended!"

Jasper spun Alice around to look at her shirt and…sure enough, written in small print under the logo were the words 'Pun intended.'

Snickers and giggles could be heard all around us.

"Fucking hell," I muttered under my breath as the guys fell into various fits of laughter.

xx_C_xx

_It's amazing how quickly the tide can turn._

All the giggles and snickers had stopped. They were shut down. Closed for business.

Somehow, we weren't quite as funny now.

_It was all good just a moment ago…_

When Emmett went head to head with Alice on the first frame, he had a good amount of swagger to his step. He even threw Rosalie a wink. She blew him a supportive kiss in response, like a good little girlfriend.

Alice made a gagging sound.

Ever the good sport, she let him go first as he bowled a respectable spare that, unfortunately, he couldn't pick up. He shrugged it off as he took his seat, like it was no big deal. And it probably wouldn't have been until he noticed Alice putting on her little pink and white polka dot pair of gloves with the fingers cut out.

It was really, _really_ fucking hard not to laugh out loud at the looks on all of their faces. Their jovial expressions were replaced with sheer, unadulterated awe. Nobody could have expected the brute force that Lil Mama had behind her when she rolled her ball down the lane with a wicked awesome hook. The pins all fell, bowing to her strength and power in a mixture of spinning flourishes.

She curtsied again while she watched the ball return for her coveted all white Hello Kitty bowling ball to come back to her.

I bit my lip to keep from laughing. _Yeah, assholes, it's gonna be a long night…_

Rose and Jasper struggled through their own humiliating frame. Jasper rolled his sparkly blue ball straight into the gutter when Alice flashed him her ruffled pink underwear. Apparently, he was still so flustered; he fouled out at the line on his second roll. The names and taunts being thrown at him by Emmett and Edward didn't help, either. Even through her bout of hilarity, Rose scored a double on his ass.

I waited a moment as I watched Edward stand up for his turn.

_Just look at him._

His shoulders were square, his jaw was locked tight, and determination was set on his masculine features. Confidence and ability oozed out of his pores and I wanted to jump up and wrap my legs around the man. And that feeling in my belly? It fluttered a little, taking on a life of its own now that the object of my affection was in plain sight. Fucking butterflies. I guess that's why they weren't heavy before. The excitement that they registered was different than before. This time, they seemed to scream out the same thing that was fluttering around in my head - _Mine_.

As if he could read my dirty mind, he looked up and shot me a lazy, knowing grin. Somehow, I stood up instead of rubbing my thighs together like my instincts told me to.

"Are you enjoying yourself?" I asked as I approached him warily.

"Immensely. You ladies are very entertaining tonight," he answered simply.

If I didn't know any better, I'd say _Major Payne_ had come out to play. _This_ was the Edward that we worked with, the Edward that rarely took excuses and wanted the best performance out of his staff. I decided then and there that he would get the performance of a lifetime. I hadn't had much of a chance to play with this Edward since we became an official item. I was going to capitalize on our newfound situation tonight. Test the waters of having _Sgt. Slaughter_ as a boyfriend if you will…

_Fuck yeah…_

I fist bumped myself internally. How many fantasies had I had starring this man? Not  
>Edward out at the club or at dinner. Not even Edward at the park. <em>This<em> Edward? It was time I showed him that I was ready. _More_ than ready. It was only him if I were being honest. I only wanted to give it to him...even this version.

_Especially this version…_

"Entertaining? Well, good. I'm so very glad that we've been able to amuse you," I replied in a breathy tone.

He arched an eyebrow at me.

I licked my lips, allowing my smirk to overtake me.

I nodded towards the lane. "You any good at this?"

"I'm pretty good at a lot of things."

Yeah, somehow I expected an answer like that. He'd never let me know if he wasn't. I allowed him to watch me as I took an intentional step back and eye fucked him for all he was worth. I started from his ugly bowling shoes, lingering around that oh so pretty package that he had hidden away under those neatly pressed slacks of his. My eyes roamed over his shapely arms and pecs, highlighted by the fluid material of his bowling shirt. Suddenly, the temperature in the room skyrocketed.

I kept my game face on, tilting my head and whistling low in approval as my eyes met with his.

I approached his form once again, wishing I was a little bit taller so I could pull that whispering shit on him. Instead, I made a circuit around him like I was continuing my appraisal. I had seen him uncomfortable when women at the bar came on too strong for his liking, but this didn't seem to cause the same sort of reaction. By the way he shivered slightly, just enough for me to notice, I'd have to say he enjoyed it.

I stopped in front of him, tracing the buttons of his shirt for a moment before I tugged him down towards me. His face lowered and he hovered in front of me. Warm and soft and sandalwood. I closed my eyes to maintain my focus. The desire to kiss him burned deep, but no, I wouldn't. I had a point to make. I moved closer, our noses grazing, my lips so faintly brushing his. I let my tongue sweep over his bottom lip, tasting him.

I stepped back as I choked on a sigh before he could reciprocate. I placed my fingers delicately inside of _Double F _as I lifted her gently.

"I look forward to witnessing just how good you are…Mr. Cullen."

With that, I blew him a kiss and went to take my turn. I heard the distinct sound of a groan just before I heard the beautiful sound of pins hitting the hardwood.

xx_C_xx

Needless to say, we beat the shit out of them. Don't get me wrong, they weren't bad by any stretch, but unless they were hitting strikes every frame like we were, there was no way for them to beat us. True to his word, Edward was pretty good while the other boys held their own. We had kept score during the first game, but like Edward and Jasper agreed, what was the point? They took it like men and gave us our props on a good game. I was so nervous about looking silly, but all in all, they were quite impressed by our skills.

We decided to go out for dinner instead of staying at Lucky Strike, but we needed to change our clothes first, as per usual.

Alice made sure that our outfits maintained the retro tone that we had set for the evening and we each changed into little black dresses. We all had our fair share of drinks so far tonight, but I was especially feeling no pain. I looked forward to what the rest of the night held for us. Edward and I were still quite reserved around each other, but I figured we just had to get used to the idea of 'us' a little more. The tension between us was building at a delicious pace and I could feel it all the way down to my toes.

I took my bag and headed for the women's locker room to get changed. Rose caught my eye from across the bowling alley. I noticed she had a bit of a defensive stance as she spoke with someone who had a mop of sandy blonde hair, but I couldn't make out the face of who she was talking to. She seemed to shift along with her gestures, blocking my view. After a few more moments of trying, I gave up, especially since the guys were still lingering around waiting for us. Shrugging it off, I went to prepare for part two of our night.


	18. Tell Me a Secret

Thanks and hugs go to **Mimi**, **Sunflower3759** and **Ninmesarra** for their time, expertise, and support.

I couldn't ask for more awesome people to help me with this!

**As per usual…**

Quotes, images, songs, and lyrics belong to their respective writers and/or artists.

Sadly enough, I _don't_ own anything related to Twilight. I _do_ own my original characters and my original story. No copyright infringement is intended.

Hate it or love it…let me know. Matter of fact, tell a friend! I won't mind!

**Chapter 18 - Tell Me a Secret**

"_**Seduce my mind and you can have my body. **_

_**Find my soul and I'm yours forever."**_

– _**Anonymous**_

**EPOV**

My girl certainly wasn't feeling any pain at this point in the evening. But I'd be a stupid son of a bitch to complain about it.

When those girls came out of that little dressing room, specifically _my_ girl, any pinup wet dream that I had ever had came to life. _Oh. My. Lord…_

She was an absolute vision. Each of the girls had put on a little black number that reflected their homage to the 50s tonight, but my girl stood out. She was the Marilyn Monroe of _my_ fantasy, long dark hair cascading over her shoulders, pouty red lips that popped amidst her little red belt and the single red rose on her sleeve.

_Beauty is her name indeed._

I stood slack-jawed as she approached me, much like I had been earlier in the evening. She seemed to have that affect on me for some reason. She stopped a step and a half away from me, grinning like the Cheshire cat.

"I clean up pretty good, huh?" She asked as she did a little turn for me.

"Real good," I said as I tugged her gently, closing the distance. She was too damn far away.

She ordered another drink as we waited for Alice and Rosalie to finish whatever they were doing. They had gone back into the ladies room, so I took a few moments to just savor being here with Bella. Her skin was so soft and she was so responsive to my touch. I could see it in the goose bumps that followed the path that my fingers were taking up and down her arms. I should have been concerned about how easily she was tossing back her drinks, but she was a big girl and I knew she could handle her liquor. Besides, how much damage could a Sex on the Beach really do?

The fact that she loosened up just the tiniest bit with each sip wasn't lost on me, either.

I'll be the first to admit that we were still fairly reserved with one another. I suppose that's natural when you're just starting out, but the freedom to show how I felt about her in public was good enough for now. I still didn't want to go overboard, though. I was truly content to just watch her. When I looked at her, she looked like happiness. She looked like joy. It was there in her smile, in her glow. I never wanted to stop being that gentleman for her. Since we were really doing this, trying out this relationship thing, I wanted her to feel cherished and revered by me. I didn't want to push her into too much too fast, especially in public. Truth be told, I wanted to get up on the rooftop and scream for anybody that was willing to listen that she was my girl and I was her man. To know that I had the freedom to do that would be…liberating.

I liked this. As much as I had fought it, as much as I waited for someone to really share myself with, I liked knowing that I had found the right one. I never came out and said it to her, but I hoped that when I drew her close to me, with my arm around her waist, that she could feel it, that she would know. She turned within my embrace and locked eyes with me. She kissed me slowly, deeply, and I returned it. Message sent. Message received.

When Rosalie and Alice finally emerged, they looked…intense. Alice whispered something to Jazz as Rosalie took a seat beside Emmett, speaking quietly. I wanted to be concerned, I really did, but Bella was doing her own bit of whispering, directly into my ear. I didn't want to miss a word of what she was saying, and she was oblivious to anything else going on around us.

"Edward, you looked so good out there on the lane. I just wanted to climb you like a tree."

I'm sure my eyes popped out of my head at her whispered admission. The fact that one of her hands was lingering on my chest while the other ran through my hair didn't help matters much either.

"Is that so?"

"Mmm hmm. Very much so," she confirmed as she ran her nose up and down the column of my neck.

As much as I enjoyed her newfound candid way with words, I recognized the signs of a decent amount of alcohol coursing through ones veins. I was afterall, a bartender. I couldn't control my nervous chuckle as I looked into her hooded eyes. It still floored me that all her little suggestive looks and gestures could be for me. I tried to convince myself those looks were all about the liquor taking its toll, but I knew there was something else there as well.

"Come on, Beautiful. Let's get some food into you."

xx_C_xx

We left Lucky Strike after taking a group poll. There was a perfectly suitable restaurant in house, but Rosalie and Alice were fairly adamant about going elsewhere, even more so after their powwow in the ladies room. The guys agreed with them wholeheartedly, so Bella and I ended up going along for the ride.

"What happened back there?" I asked Jasper once we had all pulled up to Alejandro's and the girls had walked ahead of us.

"Well, the ladies thought it would be wise if we moved our little party. Apparently, someone from Bella's past was in attendance and she would have been none too excited about seeing him."

I felt the hairs on the back of my neck stand up.

"Who was it?" I asked, not really sure if I wanted to know the answer.

"Some dude named Riley?" Emmett asked more than he stated.

_Shit._

This couldn't be good. In fact, this could be supremely fucking awful if she wasn't truly over her feelings for him. Any progress that she had made in regards to getting her life back on track could all be for naught. If he tries to traipse his way back into her life after their fiasco of a relationship, would she take him back into her good graces? Would she do that? Doubt plagued me already.

_What if she's alright with that?_

_What would that mean for us?_

_Shit._

"Did she see him at all?" I knew that seeing him would have put a visible damper on the evening, but she seemed to be in good spirits as we watched her walk into Alejandro's, arms linked with Rosalie and my sister.

"Umm, no," Emmett chuckled. "I think she was sufficiently distracted as she – and I quote – before you try to kick my ass – tried to climb you like a tree." Jasper tried to hide his laugh with no luck.

I choked on air, but I recovered quickly. Leave it to them to pay attention to the parts of this night that they absolutely didn't need to.

"Whatever. You assholes are just jealous." I shrugged, hoping to appear both unaffected and unembarrassed.

"Oh no, not at all. You see, Rosie learned how to climb trees when Bella did. And just as good, I'm sure."

The fucker even wiggled his eyebrows at me before fist bumping Jasper.

I looked at them for a long minute before I laughed and shook my head.

"Geez, you're as bad as Jazz is."

"No, I'm just not a prude like you are." He clapped me on the back, showing me that he was only teasing.

"I am not a fucking prude. Now, what does this douche bag Riley want? Why is he back in Chicago?"

"Alice didn't see him, but from what Rose told her, he's here on business," Jazz said. "He was at Lucky Strike for an office party or something, but he has Bella front and center on his radar now that he's seen her."

I sighed heavily.

_Can't say I blame the guy._

"What exactly does that mean?"

"I don't know, but I don't like it," Emmett said.

_That_'_s_ an understatement.

"I don't fucking like it either, especially not with how he treated her. I don't want him anywhere near my Bella."

"Should we tell her?" Emmett asked. "Rosie isn't sure that we should."

"Shit, I don't know. She and Alice would know better than any of us."

We walked in to find the girls already seated at a table, surrounded by pitchers of margaritas and baskets of chips.

"There you are, Hot Stuff. I saved you a seat," Bella winked as she patted the spot beside her. Her smile was blinding and I knew that I would do whatever I had to in order to keep it there.

I slid into the seat next to her, making sure that Rosalie wasn't seated too far away from me.

xx_C_xx

The food at Alejandro's was wonderful like always. They still had the best enchiladas in the city. I felt better knowing that all three of the girls had some grease in their systems to counteract the amount of alcohol they had ordered and consumed.

The mood around the table was festive and upbeat as we talked and ate. Bella and I meshed well with the other couples in our group. To the outside eye, we looked like we could have been together for a long time. I had given it a lot of thought about how our transition into a couple would affect our friends. But there was never anything to worry about because it went over without a hitch. All those sleepless nights were for nothing. I guess I worry too much about this stuff.

The mariachi band they had playing tonight was on fire, and Emmett pulled Bella out onto the dance floor. Soon he was twisting and twirling her around like a rag doll. She was having the time of her life and that was all that really mattered to me. Jasper and Alice soon followed suit. I kept an eye on her while I took advantage of this opportunity to have a chat with Rosalie.

"You love her, don't you, Edward?" She said, startling me. I hadn't realized how much I had zoned out watching my girl move on the dance floor.

"I'm sorry, what was that?"

I did my damndest not to look like a deer in the headlights.

She did nothing to hide her amusement.

"Oh, I think you heard me just fine there, Handsome. Our girl out there? You love her."

She nodded towards Bella and I did a piss poor job of covering the sigh that escaped me. Hell, I may have even blushed a bit. I was feeling like a 17 year old on the inside. That girl out there was becoming a vital part of my life.

"Am I that obvious?"

She shrugged a little. "Maybe, maybe not. You could say I have a sixth sense about these things and I love that girl like my own sister. I just notice how you guys are around ever since you got your heads out of your asses. If she moves, you move." She even gestured with her hands to prove her point.

_Shit. She had me there._

"Yeah, well…."

I was sure I'd be getting another warning from her, but instead she gave me a warm smile. It was sorta creepy coming from her, but I'd take it. Approval seemed like something that didn't come easily from Ms. Hale.

"Don't worry, it looks good on you, Major Pain. Now, what do we do about our little problem that showed up today? I did a good job of not junk-punching his ass on sight, but I can't make that promise a second time."

I hadn't spent a whole lot of one-on-one time with Rosalie, but I always knew she wasn't one to fuck around with silly shit. I liked that about her.

"The guys caught me up as best they could, but I was hoping you could tell me and fill in the blanks," I said as I sipped my tequila. "What exactly does he want?"

"That's the easy part. He wants Bella."

The mariachi band stepped it up a notch just then, which was great because it covered up my growl. "That's too fucking bad. He can't have her."

She sat back in her seat and smiled, tossing back the rest of the melting drink in her glass. "Excellent. I was hoping you'd say something like that."

Rosalie recounted the conversation she had with this Riley guy. She ran into him on her way back from getting her curling iron from the car…

xx_C_xx

**RPOV**

Hearing that fuckers voice after all of this time made me stop dead in my tracks, but that was only after I had scanned the place to make sure Bella was at a reasonable distance if and when this became a crime scene.

"Rose? Rosalie Hale? Is that you?"

I squeezed my eyes shut, hoping to God I was imagining things. I could play this like an old college chum, greet him pleasantly the way he was greeting me, like everything was all good but…no…fuck that.

I spun around just in time to stop the asshat from trying to hug me.

"Rosalie is just fine, Nimrod. Only my friends call me Rose."

He had the gall to look surprised, but he covered it up nicely.

_Douche._

"Umm, okay. How are you Rosalie? It's been a long time. You're looking like life is treating you well."

This acting all charming and shit business was only serving to piss me off further.

"I'm peachy, Riley, but cut the games. What the fuck are you doing in Chicago?"

"I come back to town every now and again for alumni activities. This time I'm here on business. This is actually a corporate sponsored event tonight. How long has it been?"

"Not long enough," I gritted out.

"Listen, I've been around campus, but I haven't run into Isabella. How has she been?"

Just then, something over my shoulder seemed to catch his attention. I could see his entire demeanor change when he took her in. She looks so different now than when she was with him, it's so obvious. And if anyone were to notice, it would be him, no doubt about it.

I turned my stance in order to avert his attention, to keep his gaze on me, but it wasn't working. But I wasn't about to pave the way for his dumb ass to just walk over and turn her world upside down with whatever bullshit he was selling. Not again.

"None of your goddamned business, actually."

_He laughed! The fuckhead actually laughed at me._

"Rosalie, you haven't changed a bit. But, if it means anything at all to you, I have. That's her standing over there, isn't it?"

He took a few steps forward, attempting to get around me. I met him, step for fucking step.

"I don't know what you're talking about Riley, but I'll give her your warmest regards when I see her."

He looked at me questioningly for a moment.

I just smiled, hoping to bring a quick end to this little reunion without any bloodshed.

"You don't have to do that. I see her right over there. Damn, she looks good. Listen, it was great seeing you, but I'm just gonna go over and say hello."

I stopped him with my palm to his chest.

"Maybe you're not getting my meaning, asshole. You aren't going to do anything of the sort. Bella is doing awesome and she doesn't need you. You lost all of your "checking in" privileges a long time ago. By the way, how's your little family doing back home?"

Dumb Ass didn't seem to be able to respond to that question, just stood there in silence, staring at me like an idiot. So I continued.

"Yeah, that's what I figured. Let me make this crystal clear for you. To get to her, you gotta get through me. Now, you say I haven't changed a bit, so I'm sure you remember that a problem with me is not something that you want in your life."

He arched a brow in response, but he knew better than to push me. His gaze was situated back over my shoulder, so I turned and followed it. We both watched Bella go into the dressing room to change.

"Still the ball buster, I see. Do me this favor then, Rosalie. Tell her that I'll be seeing her. I'm in town for awhile and I'm sure our paths will cross again."

xx_C_xx

**EPOV**

I wanted nothing more than to break the empty glass that was resting in my hand, but that wouldn't solve anything. Riley was back in town and he made no mistake about wanting my girl. There was nothing for me to do but watch and wait. In reality, it would be all up to Bella.

"Is that why you're being so nice to me? You used up all your good ball breaking stuff on Riley?" I teased. I needed something to break this tension, ease my frustration.

"Hell no! I actually like you. That dickhead can go jump off a bridge."

We both laughed out loud at that.

"Seriously though?" I asked. I was glad that Rosalie and I could speak freely on the matter, but I didn't want to walk away from this conversation without a clear picture of what could potentially happen because of this asshole.

"I don't think it's a huge problem per se. Our girl is tough. You'll see. We need to tell her and she needs to be aware that he may pop up at some point. I think she'd rather be prepared, but I have no doubt that she can handle Riley," she said.

I felt a knot forming in my gut, but she was right. Bella was strong and she could deal with the situation. I just had to keep myself from bitching up and worrying about things….

"And I doubt you have anything to worry about, pretty boy. She's just as crazy about you as you are about her."

Her ability to see right through me was aggravating, but I wouldn't have a chance to call her out on it tonight.

"Hey guys?" Emmett called, drawing our attention to the dance floor.

"I think it's time to call it a night."

He walked over to our table with a sleeping Bella wrapped up in his arms.

xx_C_xx

**BPOV**

I could hear the conversations going on around me. Sleep can be tricky when you've had a few too many drinks, and way too many spins on the dance floor. You sort of drift in and out of it even though all you want to do is pass out and redo the last few hours.

Details were lost to me as my head pounded and throbbed. I could make out Emmett's booming voice as he drove and I drifted off again. Alice's tinkling voice woke me up again, but seemed further and further away, finally stopping altogether as we stopped and she and Jasper got out of the car after giving me a kiss on my cheek. I found sleep again, but only briefly. Rose and Edward seemed to be having a bit of a back and forth discussion – I won't say argument because Rose didn't have to fucking argue with anybody. She didn't sound very happy, but the conversation ended once the car stopped again and I was lifted out of it.

"You can sleep, Beautiful. I've got you."

I recognized the masculine timbre of Edward's voice as I allowed sleep to finally overtake me. I was suddenly surrounded by softness. He tucked me in and wrapped his arms around me tightly.

xx_C_xx

I never slept well or for long periods in unfamiliar surroundings. Not that I made a habit of it, but I was still a college student.

_Sue me._

I sat up in the strange bed and immediately noticed that I was surprisingly comfortable being in it. Comfortable, but alone. I thought for sure that Edward had carried me up the stairs to our apartment, but it seemed that he had actually carried me up the stairs to _his _place. I lifted the covers to find myself still fully dressed, minus my shoes.

_Always the gentleman._

At the end of the bed was a pair of boxer shorts and a wifebeater. Suddenly feeling constricted by my dress, I changed into them. My bag was also at the foot of the bed, so I took that opportunity to tuck my dress away and swap out my thong for a regular pair of panties. Comfort was what we were going for, right? My head was still feeling the effects of my drinking, but sleep had actually brought me some relief. Looking over, I noticed some orange juice and two aspirin on the night stand. I smiled and took them.

_So thoughtful._

The soft sound of a piano reached me and I knew exactly where Edward had gone. The sound was beautiful, but kind of sad, like he had something on his mind. I hadn't had the pleasure of hearing him play, but it was clearly something that he needed to do more often. He was extremely talented.

I tiptoed down the steps and found him playing his heart out in the dark. Moonlight streamed in from the balcony doors, casting an eerie shadow on his form. I wasn't sure what he was thinking about, but I wanted to take away whatever was drawing this type of release from him. It was such a strange feeling. I couldn't seem to stay away from him too long. It was like I was drawn to him. Even in this moment of solitude, there was no way that I could back up those steps.

I sat there, still and unmoving, until he finished his song.

"Edward?" I whispered, not wanting to disturb the quiet hush that had fallen over the room.

His head popped up, obviously surprised by my presence.

My legs carried me closer to him and the baby grand.

"I'm so, so sorry for intruding. I heard you playing and…I couldn't stay away."

I hoped he had heard me. I barely heard the words come out myself.

He didn't say a word. He just nodded and held his hand out for me. I hesitated for a moment, wanting him to be sure, but the main thing that his eyes reflected was certainty. Like a moth to a flame burned by the fire, I padded across the floor and took it.

He turned to face me from his spot on the piano bench and immediately wrapped his arms around my waist. My fingernails ran along his scalp, finding the tense planes of his back. The familiar hum was there, buzzing and sparking around us.

"How are you feeling?" He asked, his nose drawing circles along my midsection.

"Much better, thanks to you."

I pulled his head back, needing to see his eyes. I'm not sure exactly what it was I was looking for, but I needed to see what it was that was lingering there. What I saw overwhelmed me. I saw need. I saw fear. I saw desire.

"Edward?"

He looked away from me, almost as if he thought I could read his mind. Then he turned back to me again, and drew me closer still, pulling me onto his lap.

"Bella…"

I kissed both of his eyelids that were squeezed shut. Then I kissed his nose. Then both of his cheeks. His chin. I wanted him to know that I was here.

"Bella…I need you. So much."

I took his face into my hands then, silently willing him to open his eyes and look at me. When he finally did, I placed a feather light kiss on his lips. So soft and tender, full and smooth. He needed me, but I doubt it was anywhere as much as I needed him….in so many ways.

I pulled back in order to tell him so, but his damn eyes. I made an embarrassing squeaking noise, startled at the intensity of his gaze in the moonlight. It was more than I could handle. He cupped my cheek in his hand and I leaned into it, running my fingers along his jaw line, tracing a pattern along his throat.

"You're a major part of my life now, Bella. I can't picture my world without you in it. I don't think I can breathe without you now. When I say that I need you, that's exactly what I mean. I can't…"

I know that interrupting him was rude, but it couldn't be helped. I had to kiss him. I teased his bottom lip with my teeth, pleading for entrance.

He granted it without hesitation.

**EPOV**

I felt like a wide opened book and I knew she could see exactly what I didn't want her to when she looked into my eyes – fear.

Fear of the unknown was stifling me. We had come so far to get here and now, to possibly have her wrenched away from me, felt like a death sentence. She had slowly but surely become my world, easily and without question the most important thing in it.

_How do you let go of that?_

I don't know, and I didn't plan on finding out anytime soon, either. I had come downstairs after tucking her in so I could clear my head of the doubt and bullshit that lingered. Playing my Baby Grand was always my go to move when I needed to think. I feared I would make an ass of myself with my declarations, but she put a stop to that quickly and efficiently. I was simply lost to her kiss. Once my tongue was enveloped in the warmth and taste of my girl, I was a dying man given a second chance at life. I ran my hands tentatively up and down her sides, gently grazing her breasts, making more substantial contact on every pass. She tugged a little more forcefully on my hair, inching her body a little closer than it had been a moment before. Our gentle, sweet kisses became frantic in a matter of seconds.

The weight of her breasts felt magnificent in my palms. The thought occurred to me that I may have been moving too fast, but instead of pulling away from me, she molded herself into me even more. She was already straddling me on the piano bench, so I was unable to get us any closer. The surprise that registered on her face hadn't escaped me; I was just as surprised by my actions as she was. I wasn't in control anymore, that much was for sure.

Bella made herself right at home, grinding herself onto my erection. This was the same erection that I had become a professional at keeping under wraps as not to scare her off. I couldn't stop myself from opening both palms and gripping onto her tight, firm ass, squeezing the flesh for good measure. The feeling was divine.

"Bella," I rasped in between kisses. "Bella, love, I don't want to start something that neither of us will be able to finish."

She moved along my dick with purpose, back and forth with that confidence that I fell in love with. "Why, Edward? Why won't we finish?" She reached down between us, palming me through my pants, firm and sure. "Edward, don't stop this now. Let me show you what you do to me." Her voice, husky and full of need.

"Bella," I said. There were no other words to be found.

Our mouths clashed forcefully, devouring one another. I pushed her back onto the piano keys in an effort to free her from my t-shirt; her beautiful, full breasts bouncing free. I sucked and nibbled on each pink, perfect nipple, spurred on by her moans of pleasure. These were sounds that I never thought I would have the chance to hear from her. All the while, she never stopped her grinding motions. The friction between us gave way to a different sensation that I wasn't able to describe. Our movements were almost being guided by the steadily increasing warmth and moisture that gave away the extent of her desire for me. She wanted me just as much as I wanted and needed her.

I ran my hands under the waist of her panties, so cotton and cute. I reached in, running a single finger along her slit, lightly grazing her swollen clit. She moaned and I couldn't keep the grin from splitting across my face.

"Is all of this for me, Beautiful?"

"Mmm hmm," was all that she could manage with her lip trapped between her teeth.

"What would you like for me to do with it, Love?

"Edward," she whispered, lifting herself up by her hands and pressing down on the keys.

Normally, I would have demanded more of an answer than that, but somehow, I knew exactly what she meant. I took advantage of her being lifted up and slid her panties and shorts down her legs, watching them fall to the floor. I slid my pants and boxers down, but was only able to get them to just above my knees before she wrapped her legs around my waist. I teased her opening with the tip of my now throbbing erection. I knew that I wouldn't be able to take much more. It had been a while, so this direct contact with her warm, slick heat was more than I could bear. I would have to make it a point to make things up to her later.

"Baby?" I whispered, licking around her earlobe and along the column of her neck.

"Ye -es - s," she forced out.

Our position against the keys of my piano allowed for a much more intimate connection than I ever could have imagined. There we were, her straddled and leaning against the other love of my life and me, simply sitting on this bench in the best possible position on the planet.

We barely even moved our bodies. She was such a vision, splayed out and opened before me. Her hips ground so delicately and yet, so very sinfully.

I followed her rhythm, meeting each move of her hips with a shallow thrust of my own; my mouth never losing contact with her lovely throat and ear. The beauty of the moment was that it was silent all around us aside from the sound of our heavy breathing and the occasional ping of a piano key. Each grind resulted in more of my length being enveloped in her sweet, soft pussy. Every movement was magical. There was no rush, no race to get where we were going because we would get there together, inch by inch. It was heaven.

Just before I was fully sheathed within her, my strokes became impossibly deeper. Her hips moved impossibly faster. I wrapped my arms around her waist, hooking under her back and lifting her up off of the piano.

"Bella," was all that I could ground out as my need for her overtook me. I held onto her body for dear life as she latched onto my shoulders, screaming out with the violent force of the orgasm that crept up on her. She shook uncontrollably, pulling me over the edge right along with her. My own orgasm ripped through my body, leaving me incapable of slowing my thrusts until every ounce that I had to give was spent.

We sat there, lost in time, holding onto one another, sharing sweet kisses and delicate touches.

I scooped her up bridal style and carried us both to bed, tucking her in for the second time, but this time I was right beside her, and it felt so right.


End file.
